


Teacher's Pet

by AngelsFallFirst



Category: Nightwish
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Student/Teacher, F/M, Teacher-Student Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-04
Updated: 2016-08-18
Packaged: 2018-05-24 16:57:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 44
Words: 95,075
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6160342
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AngelsFallFirst/pseuds/AngelsFallFirst
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>[Alternative universe fanfiction about Tarja and Tuomas. Rating will go up in later chapters!!]</p><p>Tarja Turunen teaches singing at a university. Her normally strict behavior changes when a new student messes with her head madly.</p><p>Tuomas Holopainen is new at the university and first he has no idea what he even does here - until he falls in love with this wonderful, beautiful creature, who is no one else than his teacher ...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

She came in like a thunderstorm. With a loud *wham* she banged her bag on the desk, making every student sink two centimetres deeper into their seats.  
"Stand up!", the teacher barked and every student jumped up.  
"Good morning, class", the teacher now said calmly and the students answerd in a choir.  
"Good morning, Miss Turunen!"  
The teacher looked around the room, checking if everyone was present. And everyone was, no one ever played hooky in her class, everyone knew she would find out. And her vengeance would be unbearable.  
"Everyone present?", the Finn asked.  
"Yes, Miss Turunen", her frightened students answered.  
"Alright. Anyone remembers what we did last week?"  
This time no one answered and the black haired teacher started to bump her palm against her desk in an inpatient way.  
"Did no one take notes?", she asked. "I told you in the beginning of the year to take notes whenever I say something important! You'll need this! You'll be thanking me for that in a few years!!"  
"M - Miss Turunen?", a girl suddenly said shyly.  
"Sandra?", Tarja said.  
"I - I wanted to ask how we can take notes whenever you say something important? We'd be taking notes the whole lesson."  
No one said something. Normally Sandra knew how to talk to teachers, but Tarja wasn't like the other teachers.  
"Well, that's your problem", she said icily. "On Wednesday we will write a test about what we did last week, well, you'll write the test."  
Everyone moaned and Tarja smirked. "Next time take notes", she whispered and observed Sandra as she pulled her notepad out of her bag.  
"Put that away, Sandra", she barked and the girl looked at her startled.  
Oh, how Tarja loved to tyrannise her students. "We'll go to do a little practice today, you have enough experience now to try what you learnt through the theory lessons."  
No one said something, so Tarja added, "We'll go to the music room and sing. I've never heard your voices before, so I thought about -"  
She got interrupted by a knock. Everyone stared at the door as it opened and a young man entered the classroom.  
"Sorry for being late, Miss Turunen", he said. "My bus was stuck in traffic."  
"Are you Mr. Holopainen?", Tarja asked and the young man nodded.  
"Come here", Tarja said. "I need your informations."  
While the man approached the teacher's desk with hanging shoulders, the students started to whisper.  
Why did he come so late in the term? It was already November!  
Why had he long hair and earrings?  
Why did he dress like he did? Wearing jeans and a black shirt, which was buttoned open on the collar but held together by a tie?  
Was that a rosary around his neck, dangling down his chest?  
Was he a rock star, trying to dress sophisticated?  
"Name?", the teacher asked, ignoring the brilliant blue eyes of the young man. She loved blue eyes, blue eyes like that made her go weak, made her knees wobbly, made her heart beat. But she had seen the man's blue eyes and decided not to look at him closer, he was her student, for heaven's sake!  
"Holopainen. Tuomas", the young man said lowly and Tarja looked for him in the list.  
"Hometown Kitee?", Tarja asked. "Is that correct?"  
Tuomas nodded and the students started to whisper again.  
He was from Kitee! How embarrassing!  
"SHUT UP!", Tarja barked and everyone jumped, Tuomas included. His eyes went wide when he finally looked at the teacher, whom he had found pretty when he had entered the classroom.  
Now he had to change his mind.  
She was gorgeous.  
Beautiful.  
She was a goddess.  
An angel.  
Her eyes were so green that he had to think of a flower meadow in spring. Her lips were full and well formed and in a lovely shade of red. Her nose was perfect, but not operated. Her eyebrows, though, Tuomas was so close that he could see that she had used an eyebrow pencil.  
He didn't care, the form of them looked lovely.  
Her long, black hair was tugged behind her ear on one side, which gave him access to stare at her ear. And even her ear seemed to be perfect. The small red stone in her ear hole made her look classy.  
The shape of her face made him wonder how it would feel to touch her face, he had never seen a woman with cheekbones like hers, sharp and shapy. And her skin -  
"Is your birthday correct as well?", the goddess brought him back to reality.  
Tuomas hadn't noticed that he had held his breath, and now that he breathed normally again, he could smell her scent. It smelled like flowers ... Was it a perfume or her own scent? It smelled so lightly, it couldn't be a perfume. Maybe it was her shampoo? Tuomas wanted to grab her hair and smell it.  
"December 25th, 1976?", Tarja asked and Tuomas nodded, suddenly wondering about her birthday. How old was she? She looked very young, not even one single crinkle was visible.  
"Okay, look for a desk", Tarja ordered. "And try to be on time tomorrow." As she looked up to him, their eyes met.  
For a felt minute it was completely quiet in the room.  
Tarja's eyes were sunken into those sky blue/grey orbs, those long, thick lashes, this soft gaze ...  
Tuomas was feeling something similar.   
Her eyes bore into his and for a short moment they felt a connection.  
He is twenty, Tarja thought. That's acceptable. Wait - what am I thinking?? And why are his eyes trailing down ...?  
Tuomas' look slowly fell to her cleavage.  
Normally his reaction when he saw a hot woman was to look at her boobs first. But with his teacher it had been different - he had seen her whole body first. And when he had decided that she was beautiful, he had observed her face. Now he was checking out her body, something he usually immediately did.  
His eyes found her cleavage and he tried hard not to moan.  
She wasn't only gorgeous and beautiful, she was also hot.  
She was a gorgeous, beautiful and hot goddess.  
"Please", Tarja said lowly and the young man's eyes travelled up again. "Have a seat."  
Tuomas nodded and turned, walking to the desks with hanging shoulders. His backpack hung down on his right shoulder only, which made this shoulder hang down a little more than his left. His head also hung down, Tarja noticed. Was he here to sing? If he was, he really needed to change his posture.  
She waited until he had found a free desk in the very last row, next to the most beautiful girl in the class. But why did Tarja disturb the fact that this girl (what was her name again? Linn? Tarja only remembered that it was a Swedish name) was staring at him, obviously interested?  
Tuomas only noticed the blonde hair of the girl next to him. Oh great, a Blondie, he thought and decided to ignore her. Which wouldn't be hard with the most beautiful creature being his teacher.  
"Hey, I'm Linn", the girl whispered, but before Tuomas could even answer, Tarja stopped the conversation.  
"SHUT UP, LINN!"  
Tuomas tried hard not to smile. What a fury this beautiful person was. Why was she such a witch? She didn't have to be ... She could get everything, that beauty she was ...  
"Okay, let's go to the music room", Tarja ordered and as no one stood up in the next second, she screamed again. "LIFT UP YOUR LAZY ASSES, COME ON!"  
And everyone jumped up. Now Tuomas grinned. She was amazing.

"So ..." Tarja bumped her index finger against the blackboard again and again. The whole class was waiting for the next thunderstorm. "I knew that I would have a hard time with some of you ... But this ... How the fuck did you think to pass this year without being able to sing?? At least one of you could be talented!"  
No one answered and everyone looked at Cornelia, who had - in everyone's opinion - sung the best.  
"I can't teach all of you!", Tarja said. "I thought I'd have to train maybe three or four, but this - I can't train all nineteen of you! You'll need to look for a teacher for yourself."  
"Can you sing?"  
Everyone's head turned and now the whole class stared at Tuomas shocked.  
"Tuomas!", Linn whispered shocked.  
"What?", Tuomas asked her and then he said loudly, "I'm sorry, Miss Turunen, but you can't be like that without showing us how it works. Everyone of us is a bad singer? What is your imagination of a good singer, then?"  
"She really, really can sing!", Linn whispered and Tuomas shrugged.  
"How can I judge? I've never heard her singing before."  
"Believe me, then", Linn said. "And now you'll better be quiet ..."  
Tarja's eyes were furious. "You want to hear me sing?", she asked calmly, exactly that calm that usually came before the thunderstorm.  
"Yes", Tuomas answered and everyone held his breath.  
And Tarja didn't answer, but she took a book with songs of the Nineties. "What do you want to hear?", she asked and the whole class stared at her. And then at Tuomas, who looked quite satisfied.  
"Choose a song you like to sing", he said and Tarja opened the songbook.  
Tuomas didn't know the song she chose, it was a slow and classic song.  
But now he wished that Linn had stabbed out his lungs as he hadn't stopped talking when she had told him so.  
Her voice was the voice of an angel.  
It was so clear and so full, it was operatic and unmistakable. He had never heard a voice like that.  
"Her voice has a vocal range of three octaves", Linn whispered into Tuomas' ear and he swallowed.  
He could hear at the high part ... Her whole body was trembling when she was giving everything to reach that high note, and it sounded like an angel singing. But at the same time it looked so erotic ...  
Tuomas scanned her body again, bathing his eyes in her curves, her trembling breasts ... Her parted, red lips ...  
"And she is so beautiful", Linn sighed. Tuomas nodded, not able to say something.  
Tarja ended the song with another high and operatic note. As she stopped, she was breathing hard, her chest was raising up and down rapidly. "Was that good enough?", she breathed and Tuomas nodded wordlessly.  
The students started clapping, but Tuomas couldn't join. He couldn't even move.  
He wanted to compose a song for her, wanted to play it next to her while she was singing.  
He had just fallen in love.

He needed to find out more about her. The only thing he knew about her was her name, Tarja Turunen, and that she was a goddess or an angel and a prisoner in a very lame job, a teacher.  
Tuomas bumped his head against his keyboard. He had never felt something like this before ... that woman had bewitched him. Did no one else in that classroom feel like that? If no, how was that possible?? He groaned.  
"Tuomas? Is everything okay with you?"  
Tuomas lifted his head up and stared into his mother's worried face.  
"Why?"  
"Because you're in here for an hour already and you only bump your head against your keyboard. How was college?"  
"I guess I have no inspiration to play anymore", Tuomas sighed and crashed his head on the keys again.  
"Well, that didn't even sound bad!", Kirsti tried to compliment her son but he only glared at her. "Sorry", she quickly said. "Is it because of the college? Are the other students better than you?"  
"No ... it's not about the students", Tuomas sighed. "They're even nice, the girl next to me is very ... talkactive." He grimaced and Kirsti laughed. "It's about the teacher ... She's a fury but such a damn good singer. She tyrannises us but somehow I'm totally daunted by her. Despise her being a fury she's almost too gorgeous to be mad at her ..."  
"Sounds like a lovely person. I can't wait to meet her at the parents-teacher-conference", Kirsti said sarcastically and Tuomas let out a long sigh.  
"Anyway, did you ask for a room at the college?", the blonde woman changed the subject.  
"Yes", Tuomas sighed again. "That stupid secretary said I'm too late for this term and if I'm lucky someone will leave and then I'll get his room."  
"I'm sure someone will leave", Kirsti promised. "Someone always leaves after a term. A new job, too much stress, his family moved, impregnation, death ..."  
"You can stop, I got it", Tuomas groaned and hit his head against the keys again and again.  
How could he get that woman out of his head?


	2. Chapter 2

Tuomas checked the time table that the secretary had given to him. He was looking for ME, which meant Music Education, which meant Music Education with Tarja Turunen.  
Monday was already done, one hour theory. Tuesday - nothing. No Music Education on Tuesday. Wednesday: ME. One hour. Probably theory again. Thursday - nothing again. Tuesday and Thursday would going to be useless.  
But then:  
Friday. Four hours ME in a row. Probably practise.  
Tuomas' heart was beating as he laid his finger at the four small ME's and caressed them gently. He wore a light smile and leaned back. As he closed his eyes he imagined her face inches apart from his. Her smile was only dedicated to him, her green eyes were darkened ...  
He opened his eyes again. Why am I thinking about her like that?, he thought bitterly. I've only met her yesterday, I have no idea how she is. Maybe she's also a witch in private. And I have no idea how old she is. And besides that - she is my teacher. I can't be in love with my teacher!  
He sighed and peeled his headphones out of his bag. He had a long day coming up to him, so he needed a dose of Heavy Metal before he could start this day.  
He had to stand up at four in the morning, because he had to drive to Helsinki first. He had decided to drive by train, so he could either sleep or study a little while he was driving. At about seven he would arrive in Helsinki, but then he still had to take the bus to get to the university. And that could last an hour, as it had done the day before.  
Tuomas came too late again, but luckily the History teacher understood why he was too late.  
"I have to drive here from Kitee everyday because every room is taken", he explained to the teacher, a young, blonde woman. She was pretty, but as she nodded at Tuomas and welcomed him, he wished she was the strict dark haired.  
In the breaks he wandered through the halls of the university, but he didn't see her once. Maybe she had a free day?  
"Tuomas, hey!", an excited voice suddenly called and Tuomas turned around startled. Linn was waving at him. She was standing in the middle of a group of girls, not stopping to wave at him.  
Tuomas sighed and approached them.  
"This are my friends", Linn said giddily. "Girls, this is Tuomas. Tuomas - Valerie, Cia, Lucinda, Jule, Cornelia, Amy and Sabrina."  
"Hi", Tuomas said emotionless and Cia and Valerie looked at each other and started to giggle. Linn smiled broadly. "What'ya up to?", she asked.  
Looking for Miss Turunen and hoping I will never meet you and your friends again, Tuomas thought, but he didn't answer.  
"He's shy", Linn told her friends and Tuomas had a sudden urge of strangling her, so she would finally stop talking.  
I need to find Miss Turunen, he thought helplessly. Tarja ... Miss Tarja Turunen ... She's not married ... How old is she?  
"I need to go. My lecture starts soon", he said.  
"In which course are you now?", Linn asked and Tuomas checked his time table.  
"Eh - literature."  
"Then we can go together!", Lucinda said. "Together with Cornelia!"  
The reddish blonde and the purple haired girl looked at each other excitedly.  
Help, Tuomas thought, but he forced himself to smile. "Kay, let's go."  
Lucinda and Cornelia were like Linn. They talked and talked and weren't quiet for a single minute.  
In the classroom they started to fight about if Tuomas should sit next to Lucinda or Cornelia.  
Tuomas ended that fight with sitting down next to a tall boy with glasses in the first row.  
In the next lesson, English, he met Valerie, and because it was the only free place, he sat down next to her. Valerie was a little different, she didn't talk as much as the other girls and she seemed to be really concentrated on the lesson. He got a bit annoyed by her after he noticed what she was doing when someone read an English text out loud - she read along quietly. Her pronouncing was very good, no doubt, and - other than the others who were reading - she was pronouncing the words correctly. But it was annoying anyway.  
He was hoping they wouldn't follow him in lunch break, and he was lucky to flee from them. He grabbed his food and carried it to a table with a few people. These eight girls would never have enough place to join, there.  
"May I have a seat?", he asked and everyone around the table nodded without a word.  
After the lunch break he went to the next course, Arts, where he saw one of the girls immediately. She was standing in front of a canvas and already drawing. She looked so concentrated and not caring about anything around her, so he went to her.  
"Hi", he said and the brunette looked up.  
"Hi - Tuomas, right?"  
Tuomas nodded. "What was your name again? Sorry."  
"No need", the girl said with a shrug. "I'm Johanna, but everyone calls me Amy. Long story."  
Tuomas smiled.  
"What are you drawing, Amy?", Tuomas asked and Amy turned her canvas around, so he couldn't see it.  
"It's ... embarrassing", she said, her cheeks red.  
"I won't tell anyone."  
"I'm drawing ... My idol."  
"So you're drawing a human? May I see?", Tuomas asked.  
"But please don't tell anyone", Amy pleaded and as she turned around the canvas again, the breath got caught in Tuomas' throat.  
It was Tarja Turunen.  
"Is that ... Miss Turunen?", he asked and Amy nodded.  
"She is so amazing", she said shyly.  
"She is, indeed", Tuomas said with a smile. "Are we in the same ME class?"  
Amy shook her head. "I'm with Valerie. You are with Linn, right? Then you are also with Jule and Corny."  
"Corny? You mean Cornelia?", Tuomas asked and Amy nodded. "She sung beautiful yesterday", he said.  
"Corny is a wonderful singer, but Miss Turunen hates everyone's talent as long as you're not as good as herself", she sighed. "Jule, for example. She is an amazing piano player but Miss Turunen doesn't care about that, because it's no singing. She's a bitch but ... she's just so amazing."  
"I was wondering ...", Tuomas started, but then the teacher came in.  
"You know the rules, you can start!", he told the class and Tuomas grabbed a canvas and sat down next to Amy.  
"What shall we do?"  
"Just draw", Amy answered. "Mr. Jokinen is the coolest teacher here, he lets us do what we want, he only wanders around and gives us little hints what we can do better."  
"Okay, cool." Tuomas grabbed some pencils and looked at Amy's art-Tarja again. "So beautiful", he complimented.  
"It's only beautiful because she is beautiful", Amy whispered and Tuomas nodded.  
"That's true. Listen ... I was wondering about her age. She's very young, isn't she?"  
His heart was beating as he asked her, but Amy didn't seem to notice his interest in the teacher.  
"She turned thirty last August", she answered without another question and Tuomas tried hard not to jump in the air.  
Thirty!  
That was even younger than he had expected! He clenched his fist around the pencil and suppressed a happy laugh. He would turn twenty-one in a month, so she was only nine years older than him! Nine and a half. Everything less than ten years was acceptable.  
It wasn't too creepy that he loved her.  
With a smile he started to draw something random. In the end it turned out to be a few birds, a crow, a dove and an owl.  
Mr. Jokinen complimented him and told him to use the internet to look for pictures of those birds to perfect the details.  
And then he looked at Amy's canvas. "WOW! That is - I am speechless! Where did you learn to draw like that, Miss Langinen?"  
Amy was bright red. "It's just my hobby ..."  
"She is beautiful", Mr. Jokinen said. "You know - she almost looks like ..." He went quiet and Tuomas could see the angst in Amy's eyes. He secretly hoped that he wouldn't say "Miss Turunen" out loud now ...  
"Like a young Sigourney Weaver!", Tuomas called and Mr. Jokinen clapped his hands. "That's it! A young Miss Sigourney Weaver. You're very talented, Miss Langinen."  
"Thank you", Amy said and Tuomas knew that she had meant him as well.  
A few people came over to look at her work, and everyone told her that this woman really looked like a younger Sigourney Weaver. As finally everyone was gone again, Tuomas and Amy shared a short look and started to laugh heartily.  
After the Arts lesson, he was about to visit the next lesson, Finnish.  
"Oh, you can skip that", Amy told him and turned around to hug Linn. The girls walked next to him with linked arms, talking about girls stuff.  
"Why can I skip Finnish?", Tuomas asked.  
"Because you'll hear nothing new", Linn told him.  
"It's mainly for the foreigners who came to study here", Amy explained. "We have a lot of German people around."  
"Jule, Lucy and Sabrina for example."  
"They're from Germany?", Tuomas asked and the girls nodded.  
"That's why they should better go to Finnish, but we don't have to", Linn said.  
"Sounds accurate", Tuomas said and followed the girls outside. They sat down at a bench and after some time, Valerie joined them. She lightened a cigarette, telling them she really needed that now. Then she told them a long story about this guy who wouldn't leave her alone. Tuomas didn't really listen.  
And he forgot about the blabbing girls completely, as he saw her.  
And also Amy had seen her. While Valerie told Linn about that boy, Amy leaned in. "She's wearing a miniskirt", she whispered into his ear and Tuomas nodded, his mouth growing dry.  
Though she wasn't that tall, her legs were so incredibly long. She was passing them, her hair waving in the air, her hips swaying with every step she took. What a short miniskirt ... Tuomas swallowed as he could make out a peek of her rear when she swayed her hips to the left ...  
Linn and Valerie had stopped talking and stared after her as well.  
"She is so beautiful", Linn sighed.  
"And sexy", Valerie added. "God, look at her ass."  
"Val!", Linn called out and Valerie giggled.  
"No honestly!", she said. "Whenever I see her I turn gay, but as soon as she's gone I'm straight again."  
Linn was laughing loudly.  
"Val is always like this", Amy explained to Tuomas.  
"But she's right", Tuomas said. "She is very sexy. I'm also checking her out."  
"But you may, you're a man", Linn said.  
They continued discussing, while Tuomas followed where Tarja was going. She entered the library and Tuomas decided to talk to her.  
"I'll go to Finnish", he lied. "I don't want to miss the first lecture."  
"Okay, bye", the girls said and Tuomas went inside. He would take another way to the library ...

Tarja had decided to spend her free day in libraries and bookstores. She was desperately looking for a book, but none of the stores could offer it to her. It was a fantasy book and the plot was about an elf who fell in love with a human. She had read it when she was a teenager, but then she had given the book away. But since she had seen that boy yesterday ... Truth be told, she hadn't slept well. His face had haunted her, his deep blue eyes, his soft look, his long hair which framed his beautiful face so gently ...  
Tarja was looking for that book because she needed to read about an impossible love story. She needed to be sure that this could never work out, that boy and her.  
Because he was a boy and she was a woman. She was no young girl anymore.  
But she hadn't found that book, so she drove to the university. The library there had so many books for teenagers and young adults, Tarja was sure she would find it there.  
And as she crossed the school grounds, she saw him. He was sitting on a bench with three other girls. One of them suddenly leaned in and whispered something into his ear - was it about her? Or was it something intimate?  
Tarja's heart stung with jealousy and she told herself to calm down. There was no need to be jealous, she wasn't together with him. He was her student! And they looked quite cute together, actually. So she didn't even look at them as she passed them. But she tried to sway her hips a little more than she usually did.  
She could hear one of the girls say how beautiful and sexy she was and she smiled proudly. She enjoyed the fact the students looked at her and found her beautiful (and sexy) and that was why she dressed the way she did and moved the way she did. She knew she was a tease but she loved when people were nervous in her presence.  
As she entered the quiet library, every head turned to her. Logic, she wore high heels which clicked with every step she took. A group of nerdy boys turned red as they saw her and quickly looked away.  
And Tarja went to the Fantasy fraction directly, looking for the letter S.  
"S ... S ...", she mumbled. "Su ... Summ ... Summer ..."  
She had already found the books that started with "Summer", as a light clearing of a throat startled her and she turned around.  
And looked right into his beautiful blue eyes.


	3. Chapter 3

She was leaning down and Tuomas couldn't help but look at her ass. Why did she wear a miniskirt? Was she crazy? First, she was in a school full of young adults and she was a natural beauty, and second, it was November.  
He bit his lip, not sure about if he should really talk to her or leave.  
"Summer ...", she mumbled and Tuomas decided to talk to her. Maybe he could help her, she was in the Fantasy departure and he was an expert when it came to fantasy.  
He cleared his throat and Tarja turned around.  
Their eyes locked and for a moment and none of them moved. Until Tarja smiled. "The sceptic", she said and stemmed her hand on her waist. "Hello, Mr. Sceptic."  
Tarja immediately wanted to slap herself. 'Mr. Sceptic?? Am I stupid??'  
But she didn't stop smiling at him.  
"Why Mr. Sceptic?", Tuomas asked and tugged a strand of his long hair behind his ear.  
"You doubted my talent", Tarja said a little hurt.  
"I didn't", Tuomas defended himself. "I didn't doubt your talent, I didn't know about your talent ..."  
"Still", Tarja said with a broad smile. "Mr. Sceptic."  
"Well ... Miss ... Bitchy", Tuomas said and crossed his arms.  
"What?", Tarja asked and stared at him. "Miss - what?"  
"Miss Bitchy!", Tuomas repeated with much more confidence.  
"How dare you -", Tarja started and shook her head. Don't. Keep calm, she told herself. "How dare you calling me a bitch", she whispered.  
"I dare because no one else does", Tuomas said courageously. The talk went different than he had intended but at least they were talking. And he could look at her closely ... Her lips were parted as she was still too shocked to talk. "Honestly, Miss Turunen -", Tuomas started, but he got interrupted by his teacher.  
"Can we meet somewhere else?", she asked quietly. "Somewhere more quiet?"  
"Uhm ...", Tuomas looked around the library and Tarja's cheeks went pink.  
"Louder", she corrected herself embarrassed and Tuomas smiled. God, she was gorgeous.  
"Where and when?"  
"I thought about this evening", she said with a wink. "There's a bar I like ... It's probably not something you're used to, but -"  
"It's okay", Tuomas said. It was hard to breathe for him, right now. "Why do you want to meet me there?"  
Tarja wanted to bite her lip, but she knew it would look insecure, so she didn't. "I know almost everything about my students, because they tell me during the first weeks. As a pedagogue this is important for me. With you I had no chance ... And you interest me. You're different, you dare to talk ..."  
"I'm a little older than the others", Tuomas said.  
"Let's talk tonight", Tarja said and winked again. "You can tell me why you're older and why you came later than the others ... Why you have to drive everyday and why you think I'm a bitch."  
Tuomas smiled shyly. "Sure", he said. "Where is this bar?"  
Tarja pulled a pen out of her bag and looked around. "Do you have a piece of paper?", she asked him.  
"Only my books", Tuomas answered and held his breath when the teacher took his hand and started to shove up the sleeve of his shirt. Her slim, cold fingers touched his hot skin and left goosebumps there.  
He shivered when she put the pen on his skin and started to write how he would come to that bar, starting at the university.  
"Okay?", Tarja asked as she was done. Tuomas read the instruction again and nodded.  
"Rockhouse Helsinki, eight o'clock. I've got it."  
"Good. Then you can leave." She turned around again and continued looking for a specific book, one hand on her hip.  
Was it real? Would he meet that sexy creature tonight?  
"Can I help you?", he asked hoarsely and the woman turned around again.  
"Still here?", she asked.  
"Are you looking for something specific?", Tuomas asked a little louder.  
"Summer of elves", Tarja answered without hesitating and Tuomas' jaw fell.  
"You ... You like things like that?"  
"Yes", Tarja answered and Tuomas swallowed. She was ... perfect.  
Summer of elves was a book full of passion, love, fantasy, humour ... An elf called Sanuri falls in love with a Finnish boy. She finds a way to get a human for one day, in which she has to win his heart. She does, because Leon had fallen in love with Sanuri years ago when he had seen her first, and there the passion begins. That one night is so erotic, passionate and beautiful ... But sadly it is the wrong way to win his heart and she turns back into an elf ...  
Tuomas had been in love with the writer for years, not only because of her name (Raava Holopainen) - the way she had described everything had taken his breath away. He had never read something erotic like that from another Finnish author.  
"I love that book!", he breathed. "But to be honest, I doubt you will find it here."  
"Why do you doubt that?", Tarja asked and grinned. "Doubting again, Mr. Sceptic?"  
"Because, Miss Bitchy", Tuomas said without hesitation, "this book is too erotic to stand around in a school's library."  
"This is a university", Tarja said. "I'm sure there's a hidden porn-fraction somewhere."  
"I don't know", Tuomas answered. He wasn't interested in porns, not at all. "But I'm sure it's not here. I ... I have it at home, though."  
"You mean you would lend it to me??", Tarja gasped.  
Tuomas nodded.  
"Wow, thank you. Well, I can't say no to such an offer."  
She grinned broadly and for the first time Tuomas could see her teeth.  
Which were perfect as well. They were straight and white ... Tuomas suddenly asked himself if she had something on her that wasn't perfect.  
"I'll give it to you tomorrow", he promised and Tarja didn't answer - she only winked at him and went past him. She went to the exit of the library, her hips swaying as always.  
"What a ...", Tuomas whispered.  
His heart was beating. His mouth was dry. He knew he was in love.  
And he would met her in a bar tonight ... Alone ...  
His smile suddenly faded as he reminded himself that he couldn't drive back to Kitee, if he went out tonight. But where would he sleep, then?  
He quickly went outside, but he was too late. She was already starting her car.  
"Fuck", Tuomas mumbled but then he decided to book a hotel room when the lectures were over. He went back into the university, his mind turning. Had it been real? He had a ... date with Tarja Turunen?  
The description on his arm told him that it was real, but his sanity told him that this was certainly no date.  
He went to the room he would hear things about his mother language he already knew and knocked. As he went in, he immediately apologised. "Sorry, I couldn't find the room."  
"It's okay, you must be the new one. Welcome!", the teacher said. "There are many places, just sit down where you want to."  
No joke, the room was almost empty. He sat down far away from Jule, Sabrina and Cornelia, so he could have his peace.  
And daydream about Miss Turunen ... Her red lips, her green eyes, her sharp cheekbones ... Her body ...  
He sunk his pen down on his Finnish-book and started writing what came to his mind.  
Ever felt away with me, just once, that all I need. Entwined in finding you one day ...

He was waiting in front of the Rockhouse. It was a big, black house with two mean looking security guys at the entrance. The music was loud and they mainly played Rock- and Metal-songs. If that was Tarja's music style, he would immediately ask her to marry him, Tuomas had decided. But currently it looked bad for him, she was already twenty minutes too late.  
"Did your woman dump you?", the girl asked him again. Her name was Elisa and she was annoying, for half an hour already she asked him things. Where he came from, what his name was, why he was still waiting ...  
"She didn't", Tuomas grunted.  
"But if she did", Elisa purred. "I'm here for you, okay? If you need a shoulder to cry ... Or to nibble on ..."  
"Go away, Elisa", Tuomas said unfriendly. "I'm not interested in you. My heart belongs to her, only her, okay?"  
"To who?", a sudden voice next to his ear asked and he twirled around.  
"Miss -", he breathed as his eyes met those meadow-green orbs.  
"Sorry, I totally forgot the time", she said and now looked at the girl who had pestered Tuomas. Her mouth was so agape, it looked as if she tried to dislocate her jaw.  
"That is ... That is ...", she stumbled. "Wow. Congratulations, Tuomas."  
"Why?", Tarja asked happily but Tuomas waved the next comment away before it could leave Elisa's mouth.  
"Thanks. Let's go inside, Tarja?"  
Tarja was stunned. He called her by her first name without asking. That wasn't really polite, but somehow it made Tarja's heart beat in expectation.  
They entered the bar and Tarja took off her coat.  
For a minute Tuomas forgot to breathe. She was ... so sexy.  
Her dress was short and deep red. It was very, very tight and gave a really good peek at her cleavage. Tuomas longed to touch her.  
He quickly looked away from her body, up to her face. Her cheekbones looked very obtrusive, Tuomas was sure she had painted those shadows beneath them into her face. Her eyelids were deep black and the line reached back to the end of her eyebrows. Her lashes were long and tight and black and her full and well formed lips had the same colour as her dress. And her hair was straight and simply falling down on her shoulders and back. No wonder that Elisa had almost suffered a heart attack when she had seen her.  
"Do you ... Do you want to drink something? Do you want a cigarette?", he asked nervously, but Tarja shook her head.  
"I can't, Mr. Sceptic", she said with a light smile. "I don't want to ruin my voice in any way."  
"Ah, okay", Tuomas said a little helpless. "Is that what you like? The music I mean. Rock?"  
"Yes", Tarja said, still smiling.  
"Do you ... Do you also like Metal?", he asked and now Tarja smiled broadly.  
"Yes", she answered and Tuomas forgot to breathe for a few seconds.  
'She is mine', he thought, his heart beating madly. 'I need her.'  
"I hope that's not strange ..."  
"Why strange?", Tuomas asked and opened his bag, looking for his music player. Wordlessly he gave it to her and she started looking through his song.  
"Like that song ... Amazing song ... Love that song!" She smiled at Tuomas. "You have an excellent taste in music, Mr. Sceptic."  
"So do you, Miss Bitchy", Tuomas answered and finally they moved to get a place. They sat down on a couch, next to each other, so they could talk.  
"Tell me, now", she said. "Why didn't you start in the beginning of the term?"  
"The university didn't want to take me in", Tuomas said. "And to be honest - I didn't want to be in. But my mother wanted me to study and talked to the university ... So they accepted me at last."  
"How the heck did your mother succeed with changing their minds?", Tarja asked.  
"Hm. Maybe because she is Kirsti Nortia-Holopainen", Tuomas said carefully and Tarja's eyes went wide.  
"She is your mother??", Tarja breathed. "That woman is the university's proudness! I admire her so much!"  
"I thought you weren't interested in piano-talents?", Tuomas asked, thinking about what Amy had told her about Jule.  
"Why wouldn't I? I play piano for myself."  
Tuomas didn't answer. And every time he thought she couldn't get more perfect, she suddenly did.  
"Wow", he said. "Good?"  
"No", Tarja smiled and blushed a little. "That's why I admire her ..."  
"Anyway", Tuomas continued. He didn't dare to tell her that he played piano as well. "It lasted two months until I got the letter that I could start. And my mother didn't want me to wait until a new term."  
"Okay", Tarja said with a nod. "And why are you older than the others? As I can remember you're getting twenty-one soon. All the others are between seventeen and eighteen."  
"I had a job for the last two years", Tuomas said. "After school I started working and I was happy with that, actually. But again, my mother didn't accept my apprenticeship and forced me to study." He laughed dryly. "But that's okay. At least I have enough money now to rent an apartment here."  
"So you don't have to drive back to Kitee everyday", Tarja said with a nod.  
"Exactly", Tuomas answered. What a nice person she was outside the campus ... She was so different in private.  
"You have more experience", Tarja went on. "You had a job for two years, so you know how life outside is. You aren't afraid of talking and saying your opinion because you have enough experience with life to know that you have to say what's going around your head, sometimes."  
Tuomas nodded again.  
"So you called me a bitch - because you think I am?"  
"In the classroom", Tuomas answered. "You told Linn to shut up, screamed at us to move our lazy asses - the pupils are afraid of you, Miss Turunen! Why are you laughing?"  
"That's just a façade", Tarja laughed. "I love to tease and frighten the students."  
"That's mean", Tuomas said coldly. "Sorry, but in my opinion you are a bitch."  
Tarja shrugged. "Tuomas - I am experienced too. I learnt that sometimes it's better to be a bitch and don't give a fuck about anyone's opinion. I do what I want and I don't care about the people who hate me for who I am. It's really none of your business, but I got hurt a lot. I was too nice and too naïve. I trusted everyone and only got mucked. That guy I'm talking about cheated on me for more times than once and I believed him every time when he said he loved me more than everything. Now I'm a bitch and now I am the woman with whom guys cheat on their wifes and girlfriends but at least I don't get hurt anymore."  
"I'm sorry to hear that", Tuomas said quietly. What a fool! Who could ever cheat on her?? He was really feeling sorry for her, but one thing disturbed him.  
'Now I am the woman with whom guys cheat on their wifes and girlfriends', she had said.  
Did that mean she had a lot of one-night-stands? Well, he didn't doubt it ... If he was a stranger in a bar, he would definitely ask her to dance, rather than anyone around here.  
"I'll fetch a drink", he informed the elder woman and stood up, not waiting for her answer.  
He bought two cokes and went back, all in all he had been gone for about a minute.  
But already this had been too long.  
When he came back, Tarja was surrounded by three tall and strong guys who all seemed to be in her age. Tuomas knew he could never get back to her without getting knocked out by one of them. But he loved that woman, she was his! He needed to try.


	4. Chapter 4

"Excuse me?", he said loudly and the tall and strong guys turned around.  
"Can I - I'm here with that lady, can you please let me go to her?"  
"Is that true?", the tallest of them answered and looked at Tarja. "You're here with that dwarf?"  
Dwarf, Tuomas thought hurt. He was 1.88, how could they dare to call him a dwarf? Okay, they were probably two metres high, but still.  
"Indeed. I'm here with him", Tarja simply answered and as if she had spoken magic words, the guys disappeared.  
"I bought coke", Tuomas said with a dry mouth.  
"Thank you", she answered with a smile, a smile so bright he had a hard job to breathe calmly. She was so breathtaking ... No wonder the guys had started talking to her.  
"So, Tuomas", Tarja said and took a sip of her coke. "When did you read Summer of elves for the first time?"  
"When I was sixteen", Tuomas answered. "I was so in love with the author. Do you know her other books?"  
"No", Tarja said surprised. "Are they similar?"  
"Mainly they are about ... impossible love stories", Tuomas said shyly. "Like a human and an elf, but also 'normal' things like a very rich and sophisticated woman and her butler. For example."  
"Sounds interesting", Tarja said, desperately trying not to ask if there was a story of a teacher-student relationship. "So she also writes normal romantic stories, not only fantastic ones?"  
"Exactly." Tuomas nodded. "But one thing is always the same."  
"The eroticism?", Tarja asked and Tuomas nodded, not able to talk.  
Her green eyes were staring into his.  
'She is so beautiful. I wish she was mine ... I mean, she is mine but only in my mind ... I wish she was mine for real. I wish I could just grab her and kiss her and go home with her ...'  
"Tuomas?"  
"Huh?"  
Tarja smiled. "I asked you something."  
"Oh - sorry. Could you repeat it?"  
"Where are you going to sleep tonight?", Tarja asked again.  
"I booked a hotel room", Tuomas answered.  
"Ah, good." Tarja took another sip. 'Very good. What were you thinking, Tari? You just invited him to the bar without thinking about that he lives three hours away. But he is so ... independent. As I said, he knows how to deal with life. He doesn't seem scared that he's in a foreign bar in a foreign city with a foreign woman. He booked himself a hotel room 'cause he knows what to do. He is ...'  
Tarja couldn't think of a word. He was young, but so grown up already. He was so calm. Shy, somehow. He was a really good-looking guy, Tarja had to admit. she had never thought she liked that long haired and bearded type of men but now, when she looked at him, she realised she did.  
"And ... Where do you come from?", Tuomas suddenly asked.  
Tarja smiled. That was something else she admired - he was shy, but when he needed to know something, he just asked. "I was born and raised in Kitee", she answered and Tuomas' jaw fell.  
"You're - from Kitee??"  
Tarja nodded. "Yes, we have the same hometown. I grew up there, until I got eight. Then my parents decided that Kitee wasn't good enough for me and my talent and we moved to Helsinki. I went to a singing school and yeah. That's my story. What's yours?"  
"I have no story", Tuomas said.  
"Oh, come on. You had a job for two years! What did you learn?"  
"Carpenter", Tuomas said and Tarja gasped.  
"My father is a carpenter!"  
"Oh", Tuomas said with a light smile. "Cool."  
"So you couldn't finish your apprenticeship because your mother wanted you to study?", Tarja asked.  
"That's right", Tuomas answered. "But it wasn't my dream job anyway."  
"What is your dream job?", Tarja asked interested.  
"My dream job ...", Tuomas said slowly. "Pianist or keyboarder in a band. Or author of books and poems."  
Tarja's heart stood still for a second. He was one of those ... a pianist. An author. Tarja's heart suddenly beat faster as usual. She had always thought about her dream man as a pianist. "And what's your dream job?", Thomas asked.  
"Teacher", Tarja said and Tuomas shook his head.  
"If you want to know more about me, you have to be honest with me", he said gently and Tarja's cheeks went red.  
How had he known ...? "S - singer", she said.  
Tuomas smiled at her. "One day you will be a famous singer, Miss Turunen. And if I may, I'd like to join for a song as pianist."  
"So you do play piano?", Tarja asked and Tuomas nodded, his cheeks red as well. "I should have known", Tarja said. "Son of Kirsti Nortia ... Do you play good?"  
"Not really", Tuomas lied. He knew he was brilliant, but he also knew to reserve himself when he had to. She was the woman of his heart, so she would get the whole attention from him. He wouldn't brag.

For almost two hours they had their fun. They talked about their earlier lives, their families, their future plans. Beside the big plans, of course, like getting married and getting children. They laughed about stories of the past and of the school. Tarja knew so many stories of her students, like embarrassing things that happened to them (she even told him one of the most embarrassing things ever, two years ago she had screamed at a guy in her class and he had gotten a boner. And the whole class had seen it. Tuomas laughed but didn't tell her how hard it was as a boy to restrain that reaction in her presence).  
They were already out of topics, as Tuomas dared to ask.  
"And that guy ... That cheated on you", he started carefully and Tarja pressed her lips together. "Sorry, I won't bother you."  
"No, ask", she said.  
"I just was interested in that story ... You know that I'm fond of sad love stories ..."  
"I'm going to tell you", Tarja said, placed her third coke on the table and leaned back. "I was twenty", she said. "And I believed in true love. He promised me to give me love and in the beginning it was wonderful. I was young, he was my first and I believed him. And I was in love ... I ... I wanted to marry him ..." Tarja lowered her eyes. "Until my best friend told me that he cheated on me. I couldn't believe it first, but she was right ... He cheated on me every weekend ... He told me then that I wasn't ... According to him I wasn't hot enough, not pretty enough ... Not good enough in bed ... But he said he loved me anyway."  
Tuomas was speechless. "That guy was blind, right?"  
"I didn't always look like I look now, Tuomas", Tarja said with a smile. "After months I managed to break up and then I changed my style. I learnt that no one wants my real self."  
"That's bullshit", Tuomas said. "Miss Turunen, if you want to find your true love, you have to act like your true self! Imagine someone falls in love with you and you marry and so on ... And then he doesn't like your true self."  
"But no one will fall in love with my true self", Tarja repeated.  
"Bullshit", Tuomas said again. "Do you still look for the one?"  
"Yes", Tarja answered.  
"A hint, you won't find him like that", Tuomas said. "In a bar? No. I met my first and last girlfriend in a bar."  
"Was it so bad that you decided not to get yourself a girlfriend again?", Tarja chuckled, secretly fond of him. His 'first and last' girlfriend ... So cute.  
"Yes", Tuomas answered. "I never loved her but all my friends had a girlfriend so I felt alone." Tuomas grinned. "We got together and I still regret that."  
"Why?"  
"In the bar she seemed like a wonderful girl. She was pretty and nice and she would have been a great catch. But her character ..." Tuomas shook his head.  
"Why?", Tarja asked again.  
"She was ... strange", Tuomas said. "She had a really strange character."  
"Example?", Tarja asked, noticing that Tuomas was deep red. It was embarrassing.  
"She - she loved S and M", Tuomas sighed. "We were about to get ... intimate for the first time when she told me. She said she loved really hard sex and if I'm the guy to 'make love' to her, she'd be out of here."  
"And what did you do?", Tarja asked, not feeling embarrassed at all. It was a normal topic to her.  
"We didn't even sleep together", Tuomas only answered. "I broke up."  
Tarja's hands started to shiver. Did that mean he was still a virgin? Of course it did, besides he had lost his virginity in a one night stand. But he didn't seem like the guy to do that. A man who thought about sex as 'love-making' (and Tarja could see that he did) wouldn't lose his virginity in a one night stand.  
Tarja had the sudden urge to show him how love-making was like.  
'Are you stupid, Tarja?? You can't sleep with a student!!'  
"And she was your first and last girlfriend?", Tarja asked.  
"Yes, ma'm. Since then I'm also looking for my true love, but I know I will never find her in a bar", Tuomas said. 'If you only knew that I've found her', he added in his thoughts. 'In a classroom. Behind the teacher's desk.'  
Tarja was feeling something similar. She was confused. He was such a wonderful man! He looked for his true love, he was romantic, he wanted to be a pianist, he was really good-looking, tall, not all too muscular, he was rather shy and polite, but he knew what he wanted.  
Her head was spinning. 'Am I ... Am I in love with him?'  
To break the silence between them, she looked at her watch. "Oh my god, it's already half past ten!", she said. "We both have school tomorrow."  
"Then we should leave", Tuomas said. It was okay for him, he could barely await the next day. He would see her again, after all.  
"Can I drive you to your hotel?", Tarja asked and Tuomas beamed at her.  
"That would be great!", he breathed. Had she just really offered him to drive him?  
"Great", she said and started to look for her keys in her purse.  
"Ehm - I'm back soon", Tuomas said. "I need to go to the toilet."  
"Take your time, until I've found my keys you can pee three times", she replied and Tuomas laughed.  
In the cabin he had to calm down, first. She was amazing.  
Hot, beautiful, funny, nice (besides the times in school), talented ... And obviously interested in him.  
His heart was beating madly and he grinned like a fool.  
'She's going to drive me to the hotel!', he thought excitedly. He wondered if he was brave enough to ask her to stay.  
'What if I ask her and she says yes?', he thought. 'What if we sleep together? What if I'm only a one night stand to her?'  
Tuomas shook his head. No, he wouldn't sleep with her this night, even if she wanted him to. He loved her, it would break him if she only used him.  
'I have to win her heart like Sanuri had to win the boy's heart! Maybe she will want me forever, then.'

But as Tuomas got back, she was gone.  
Completely.  
'I bet she's on the toilet as well', he told himself and sat down and waited for her.  
And waited. And waited.  
After a few minutes he decided to call her name into the girl's restroom, when someone touched his shoulder.  
Tuomas turned around, thinking it was Tarja, but it was one of the tall guys who had called him a dwarf.  
"Are you looking for your hot friend?", he asked and Tuomas nodded.  
"She went outside", the man answered and Tuomas thanked him.  
He went outside the bar and looked around. He thought he would immediately find her, he thought she was waiting for him.  
But she was nowhere.  
"Miss Turunen?", he called but it seemed she was gone.  
He turned around to look for her and with a shrug he walked to her cars. It was dark, but as he came closer he saw that someone was leaning against her black Ford ...  
Tuomas smiled, knowing it could only be Tarja - until he heard a moan.  
Suddenly the person moved and he saw that it was more than one - there were two. Two persons. And they were kissing.  
One of them was one of the tall guys. And the other was ...  
Tuomas froze.  
"Oh, Tarja", the man moaned. "You're hot and a goddamn good kisser ..."  
"Let's move this ... Let's drive to my apartment ...", Tarja moaned.  
"What about your boyfriend?", the man asked.  
"Boyfriend? Are you kidding? He is my little brother ...", Tarja answered and they continued kissing.  
Tuomas felt as if Tarja had stabbed him with a knife.  
His heart was breaking.  
Wordlessly he turned around and walked away, not able to believe what he had heard and seen.


	5. Chapter 5

Tuomas didn't sleep well. As soon as he entered the hotel room, he threw himself on the bed and started sobbing.  
He had never cried because of a woman. Never he had been heartbroken like that.  
But why? He only knew this woman since yesterday, why did it hurt so much?  
Tuomas knew the answer.  
'Because you thought she liked you.  
Because you thought you had a connection with her.  
Because she is the most beautiful thing existing.'  
As he had stopped crying, he couldn't fall asleep. Her words were haunting him.  
"Are you kidding? He is my little brother."  
Little brother.  
It hurt, it hurt him too much. The knowledge of that he would see her the next day again ate him.  
Finally he fell asleep, his face in a soaking wet from tears pillow.

He thanked the receptionist and asked for a card, in case he would need a hotel room again. It wasn't as good as an own apartment (or a room at the university), but is was better than nothing. He didn't have to stand up at four and he even caught the earlier bus, so he reached the university on time.  
"Hey", Valerie and Jule greeted him at the entry. "Long night?"  
"You look down."  
"I didn't sleep well", he answered and looked at Jule. "You play piano right?"  
Jule nodded.  
"Cool", Tuomas smiled lightly.  
"The bitch doesn't think it's a talent, though", Jule sighed and Tuomas' heart clenched as she called her a bitch.  
"She's only jealous", he told the girls. "She plays piano as well but not that good, so -"  
"Where do you know that from?", Valerie asked with an open mouth.  
"I - heard her", Tuomas said. "Have to go now. See you later." And he quickly left to Religion.  
And he was relieved when he saw that none of the annoying girls was there.

Religion was over fast, too fast, and after it Tuomas went to the music room with hanging shoulders. Would he survive seeing her?  
He opened the door and went past her, not directly looking at her.  
But he smelled her. She smelled lovely again (like vanilla ...) and Tuomas was sure that she had taken a shower in the morning. As if he had wanted to know that she had slept with that guy ... Maybe even showered with him ...  
"Good morning!", she called after him and Tuomas mumbled, "Good morning, big sister."  
He heard her gasp, but he ignored her. Good. She had heard him.  
He sat down at his place and finally looked at her.  
She looked gorgeous, as always. Her hair was curly today, so it didn't reach until her mid of her back but only until her shoulder blades. She wore a grey eye shadow and her lips were dark red today. She wore a white - and very transparent - blouse and a white bra beneath. The blouse was tugged into her waist high black leather skirt, which reached only a little beneath her ass. She wore fish-net stockings and knee high high-heeled boots.  
Her eyes were widened and she still looked at him.  
Tuomas locked his eyes with hers and tried to tell her what he felt gaze.  
'Why, Tarja?', he thought desperately. 'Why did you do this? It hurts. You broke my heart.'

His look was so full of hurt. Her heart ached as he looked at her, his eyes asking "Why?"  
'Because, Tuomas', she thought. 'Because I can't be in love with you. It's not allowed. It's illegal.'  
It hurt her as well to think like this. She knew she had fallen in love with him after only two hours (two perfect hours), she had fallen in love with every part of him. His character, his smile, his eyes ... His looks in general. He was so good looking but he was shy. He wasn't a player. He was still a virgin. His laugh. The way he talked. Him, just all of him ...  
Tarja had seduced that guy (whose name she had forgotten already again) because she suddenly had been afraid. When Tuomas had gone to the toilet, she had imagined what to do now.  
She had imagined to invite him into her apartment. He would have agreed, no doubt. In the apartment she would have kissed him ... And she would have let him make love to her.  
That's when she realised she had fallen for him and that this love wasn't healthy at all.  
She had seen one of he tall guys and decided to forget about Tuomas.  
She hadn't, not a second.  
While they had been kissing, she had caressed his hair and she had hated the fact that his hair wasn't long. After he had managed to drag her into her car, she had kicked him out (she had really kicked him) and driven away. She had felt bad because she had left Tuomas alone.  
Now that she knew that he had heard (and probably seen) them, she hated herself.  
She tried to tell him that she was sorry with her eyes. She tried to tell him that she hadn't slept with that man.  
But he didn't understand her.  
And then the other students entered and she had no chance to tell him, anymore.  
"So", she started as everyone had sat down. "I'm asking you rather now than later, and for those who know me, you already know what I mean."  
The pupils nodded and Tarja's eyes fell on Tuomas. "Mr Holopainen is new so - does anyone want to explain it to him?"  
Linn's hand shot in the air and Tarja nodded.  
"Miss Turunen gives us a little homework every Friday", Linn started. "We have time until the following Wednesday and if someone forgets it, the amount of homework grows."  
"Thank you, Linn", Tarja said, not looking at Tuomas. "So. Anyone who hasn't done his homework?"  
Every single student shook his head and Tuomas was - once again - amazed. She was really the only teacher he knew, who had managed to drill her students like dogs.

The lesson was exhausting for both Tuomas and Tarja. While Tuomas avoided her looks, Tarja desperately tried to find his. Her heart broke when Tuomas leaned closer to Linn and told her something, on which she replied with a hearty laugh. She beamed at him so brightly and he grinned back so gently, Tarja helplessly thought, I should forget him ... He is too young and he's one of my students ... Shall he date Linn.  
But as the teenagers wouldn't stop smiling at each other, Tarja had enough.  
"Mr. Holopainen and Miss Barnelinen!", she bellowed. "It would be very nice of you to either give us a little show right here and now or SHUT THE FUCK UP!"  
Tuomas and Linn stared at her and then started giggling.  
"Enough!", Tarja shouted, her blood boiling. The whole class was suddenly quiet. Never had anyone dared to disturb her lesson.  
"Both of you get an extra homework until Friday and you know what will happen if you don't listen to me."  
Nobody said a word.  
"I guess you do, then", Tarja hissed, her glaring eyes directly on Tuomas. "Linn, read page 170 to 173 in the music book and Tuomas, you read page 174-180. On Friday there'll be a test for both of you about your topics."  
"What?", Tuomas shouted and Linn gasped as she checked the page and saw how much it was to study. "Why do I have a bigger topic?"  
"Because you're older", Tarja answered bittersweetly. "You told me you're different because you're older. Show me."  
The air in the room was thick and still no one said a word.  
For everyone it didn't mean anything, that 'show me' of hers, but for Tuomas it meant the world.  
His heart was both clenching and feeling relieved and he didn't know what to do.  
He remained quiet for the rest of the lesson, even though Linn tried to seek for his attention.

As the lesson was over, he told Linn she should go already, he needed to go to the toilet anyway. Then he packed his stuff extra slow and when the last ones left, he slowly walked to the teacher's desk.  
He looked down to her. She was writing something in her book and Tuomas could only see her hairline.  
He smiled. Her hair was dyed, no doubt. She had a much lighter natural haircolour, brunette or brown.  
"What?", Tarja asked lowly but without looking up.  
"Why?", Tuomas finally asked. "I thought -" He stopped and Tarja finally looked up.  
"What did you think?", she asked softly. Her green eyes were so gentle ...  
"I thought you were smarter", Tuomas said. Originally he had intended to tell her "I thought you saw something else than a student in me" but he had decided to tell her about her faults directly.  
"Are you crazy?", Tarja asked and stood up. She was so tiny, had she stripped off her shoes? "Telling me I wasn't smart?"  
"Oh, you are smart, no doubt", Tuomas grinned down to her. "Though I thought you were smarter."  
Tarja stared up to him, ignoring her madly beating heart. Why were his eyes so blue? Why were his lips so kissable?  
'... Kissable?? Gosh, stop thinking about him like this ...'  
"That guy, Miss Turunen?", Tuomas whispered and Tarja saw the hurt in his eyes.  
"That's my business", Tarja told him. "My life and my decision with whom I start something and with whom I don't. Do you understand me?"  
She wished so badly to tell him that she hadn't slept with him ... But it wasn't his business! It was only her own!  
"I understand you loud and clearly", Tuomas said. "And to be honest, I'm disappointed. I thought you were looking for your the one? I thought you were believing in true love?"  
"I still do, even though it's not something that you have to worry about", Tarja said icily.  
"Somehow I do", Tuomas said. "You talked to me about that wish after all. It hurts to see you throwing your chances away." 'It hurt to see you kissing that man.'  
"Which chances?", Tarja asked challenging and put her hands on her waist. Tuomas gulped as she pushed her shoulders back and her chest forward. The white bra touched the transparent blouse and made the contours of her bra and breasts even more visible.  
"Chances of doing something else than going out", Tuomas said with a dry mouth. "I told you what I think about meeting your one in a bar."  
"You honestly think I would like to marry that guy now?", Tarja spat. "I don't even know his name! I don't even have his number! He doesn't even know where I live, we didn't make it until there!"  
The pain went through Tuomas' heart like a sword. It hurt so much, hearing about how she had fucked him in her car.  
"Wow", he said. "Wow. I didn't know you were such a slut."  
For a second it was completely quiet, then a loud *slap* broke the silence.  
"How dare you??", Tarja screeched and Tuomas rubbed his burning cheek. "Out!", she cried. "Get out of my classroom!"  
Toumas didn't wait longer, his hand still on his reddened cheek he started running out of the classroom.  
Outside he slowed down and went to the toilet, his mind turning. Had he just really called her a slut? And had she just really slapped him??  
Tuomas locked himself in a cabin and sunk down on the toilet seat, burying his face in his palms. His left cheek burned and hurt and suddenly tears started to flow.  
'Why did I do this?? I've never called anyone a slut before ... Why the woman I love? She is no slut ... Why did I do this ... She was right to slap me ...'

Tarja sat down on the chair and put her elbows on the desk. She rubbed her eyes and tried to calm down.  
'Why did I slap him? He doesn't deserve to get a slap. And am I stupid?? I CAN'T SLAP MY STUDENTS! ... But he has called me a slut ... He shouldn't have ...'  
Tarja stopped rubbing her eyes and buried her face in her hands.  
'But he's right. I didn't sleep with that guy but I do sleep with strangers often enough. I'm a slut.'  
She shook her head, deciding that she needed to apologise to him. She would tell him how sorry she was for that slap ... and, even though it was none of his business, that she hadn't slept with that man. She wanted to see his reaction to it, hopefully he would be relieved. Hopefully he would smile at her and tell her that she was no slut. Hopefully he would wrap his arms around her and kiss her, then.  
Tarja leaned back and smiled.  
'I'm really in love with one of my students. I can't believe it ...'


	6. Chapter 6

"Everything alright?"  
Tuomas let himself fall on the couch. It was seven in the evening and he was done, completely done and exhausted.  
"Nope", he answered his mother and buried his face in the pillow.  
"What's up?", Kirsti asked gently and sat down next to her son. "Can I help you?"  
"I don't know ... My music teacher makes me so angry ..." He then told his mother the shortened version of Tarja Turunen, the version where she was a mean teacher but yet too beautiful to be mad at her.  
"Too beautiful? On Monday it was too gorgeous", Kirsti chuckled.  
"She's an angel. She's too beautiful to be real, she must be an angel", Tuomas sighed and his mother let out a short laugh.  
"Now I'm really looking forward to meet her", she said, wondering about the looks of that teacher, who spinned with her son's mind so obviously. "But tell me, what did she do?"  
Tuomas sighed. "She screamed at me and the girl next to me because we talked. And then she gave us pages from the book to study and on Friday we'll have a test about it. Only Linn and me."  
"That's not really pedagogic, to be honest", Kirsti said, after all she was a teacher as well, she knew perfectly how to punish children who were always talking. "But she's the teacher, you have to respect her."  
Tuomas closed his eyes. 'I called her a slut. I didn't respect her ...'  
He sighed. He couldn't fight the feeling, the longing for her. He wanted to drive to her place, grab her, kiss her, make love to her.  
"I'm in my room", he then mumbled and stood up to walk into his room, where he sat down in front of the keyboard and started playing a random but beautiful melody, which should reflect his feelings for the dark haired, green eyed, almost ten years older than him creature, with whom he wasn't supposed to be in love with.  
"Ever felt away with me", he mumbled while he played the beautiful melody. "Just once ... That all I need ..." He played a few other notes. "Entwined in finding you one day ..." He stopped playing and buried his face in his hands once more.  
'I love her. I love her so damn much it hurts. Because I know I have no chance to get her ...'

Tarja shook her head and took a note, before she pressed another key. She took a note again and tried to play what she had so far.  
She played the melody without a name, she played it while humming a random text to it.  
"I see you everyday ... Yet I can't touch you", she mumbled and gave herself a little more to the piano. 'Think of Tuomas!', she told herself, but it wasn't necessary. She always thought of him anyway.  
"I wonder if I get punished if I kissed you", she sang on. "Yet I really want to ... Your soft lips make me go crazy, your blue eyes make my knees go weak ... It's illegal but I want you ..."  
Tarja stopped playing.  
'What a stupid song', she thought and snorted.  
For a few minutes she tried to play another song, until she gave up. She brushed her teeth and put off her make up.  
Sadly she stared into the mirror. She felt so old when she looked at herself ('Oh no, another crinkle!'). And now, compared to Tuomas, she felt even older ...

Tuomas pressed Summer of elves against his chest as he stepped out of the bus. He was late again, but it didn't matter. He didn't have ME anyway.  
He quickly rushed through the corridors, not caring about that he had English now. Nothing was important, right now - only putting the book on her desk. This was important now.  
He took a deep breath before he laid his ear against the room that said 06, Music Education, Professor Tarja Turunen.  
He didn't hear anything, no one was talking or singing, so he entered.  
And froze as two green eyes stared at him.  
'She is here??'  
His first instinct was to run as fast as he could, but then he took a step forward instead. "Hi", he breathed and Tarja stared at him.  
But suddenly her look softened. "Hello, Tuomas", she said calmly. "What brings you here?"  
"An apologise", Tuomas said and came closer. She looked fabulous, as always. She wore a short sleeved, black vest but nothing beneath (not even a bra?) and simple blue jeans (but hell, they were tight). Her hair was long again and fell down in soft waves.  
"Then I'm waiting", Tarja said and crossed her arms. Tuomas tried to ignore the fact that her crossed arms pushed up her breasts.  
"I shouldn't have called you a slut", Tuomas said.  
"I know you shouldn't have", Tarja answered dryly.  
"I was angry", Tuomas blurted out. "And disappointed. Angry, because you just went away. Disappointed, because I thought you were different."  
"Different ...?", Tarja asked and uncrossed her arms.  
"You ... I - I thought you were ... A woman like no one else", Tuomas breathed.  
"What kind of a woman?", Tarja redrilled. 'Just say it, Tuomas ...'  
But Tuomas didn't answer, a little harsh he pressed the book against her chest, and as Tarja took the book he turned around and wanted to walk away - but Tarja didn't let him.  
"Don't you dare walking away from me after I've asked you something!", she hissed and grabbed his upper arm.  
Their eyes met and Tarja was shocked when she saw the fear written all over his face.  
"Let me go", Tuomas whispered, holding the tears back. What did she even want from him?? First she slapped him, now she wouldn't let him go ... "You have the book, now please leave me be ..."  
Tarja slowly let go of his arm. Had she hurt him? Her heart beat madly as she looked right in his still shocked face.  
'Is he afraid of me?? Oh, shit ...'  
"Tuomas, I'm sorry for hurting you with that slap -", she began, but Tuomas shook his head.  
"That wasn't the way you hurt me", he whispered. "Read the book, Miss Turunen. Maybe you'll find an answer in it."  
"What?", Tarja asked confused, but he had already turned around again and was about to leave the classroom.  
Tarja let herself fall on the chair, her heart still beating madly.  
'He is afraid of me. Oh my god, what have I done?'

The whole Thursday was passing without other incidents. Tarja went home at eleven, she only had to teach two courses on this day, and Tuomas avoided her. He watched her slim but curvy figure walk to her car - the one where she had fucked with that guy - out of the window in Maths.  
He felt a little disappointed in himself that he had brought up the courage to talk with her in the classroom but then he had fled - why the devil had he fled?  
Her black (or was it rather dark brown?) hair waved in the air as she unlocked her car (no, it was definitely black). She wore a tight, red coat, thank god, it was almost December. Soon the snow would start to fall, Tuomas was wondering how her winter clothes looked like. Would they be tight and sexy?  
He smiled as he watched her in a normal routine, opening the car door, getting inside, closing it. Even while making normal humanly moves she looked like a goddess.  
"Are you looking at her?", someone next to him suddenly whispered and he turned his head, looking right into the face of one of Linn's friends.  
He nodded and she sighed.  
"She is so beautiful", the girl whispered and Tuomas smiled. She had a cute accent, Tuomas assumed she was one of the German girls.  
"Sorry, what was your name again?", he asked. "I'm not good with that ..."  
"No problem", the girl said with a smile. "I'm Sabrina."  
"And I guess you're one of those from Germany", Tuomas went on and Sabrina nodded.  
"You learnt our language quite good, then", Tuomas complimented her.  
"Thank you", Sabrina answered. "To be honest, I'm quite good with languages. I rather have English or Finnish now, I understand nothing here ..."  
"Me neither", Tuomas sighed. "I rather have ME now."  
"But not because of the lesson itself, am I right?", Sabrina asked with a giggle and Tuomas nodded, his cheeks reddened.  
"No need to be embarrassed", Sabrina said. "I feel you."

After a tiring maths lesson, Sabrina went to her friends while Tuomas walked outside. He wanted to avoid Sabrina's friends, in front of all Linn. But unfortunately she wasn't with the others, Valerie and her stood next to the ash-tray.  
'Damn, I honestly forgot that Valerie is a smoker', he thought, cursing himself, but still he approached the tray.  
"Tuo", Linn immediately said as she spotted him and Valerie held her pack of cigarettes to him without a word, Tuomas took one.  
"Hey girls", he said and lightened the thing he had sworn not to ever light again a year ago. But now that he knew that person named Tarja, he felt as if he needed something to calm himself down.  
"Have you already started studying?", Linn asked. "I did yesterday, two hours I sat there and answered the questions. It's a lot, but it's not hard at all! We'll do that."  
"I won't", Tuomas grunted. "I won't study for it."  
"What?", Linn asked shocked.  
"She'll kill you", Valerie said dryly.  
"Tuomas - yes, she's beautiful but she's the devil!", Linn screeched and Tuomas lifted up his shoulders.  
'And if she kills me, it's worth it. I'll be killed by h e r.'  
"Let him", Valerie said, as Linn wanted to go on talking. "He will learn of it. He doesn't know Tarja Turunen yet."  
'f you only knew' he thought. 'I think I know her better than any of you ...'

At home Tarja opened the book. After she had cooked herself some food she had decided to enjoy her free afternoon with Summer of elves.  
She had changed into jogging pants and a wide shirt, her hair was in a loose bun and her make up was off. She avoided to look into the mirror at days like that, thinking of herself as a scarecrow.  
She started reading with a beating heart, started reading the book that would give her so many answers to her.  
In a cold, white winter night the small, fragile elf finally decided that she was ready to visit the humans, not knowing of how this decision would change her life ...  
Tarja had already finished chapter one, as she found the answer that Tuomas had talked about. It happened soon after the elf had fallen in love with the human. Tarja turned the page and gasped as a piece of paper fell out of the book.  
With shaking hands she took it and opened it, her eyes scanning the words on it, growing wider and wider and her mouth went a little more open with every sentence that he had written.  
After she had finished reading the text that had came out of Tuomas' feather, she shut the book, put it away and went to piano. She put her fingers on the keys and as the melody she had in mind flowed through her mind, she played it.  
It sounded beautiful, so she wrote it down.  
She played the beginning of the song again, after a new tunes starting to sing.  
"Every felt away with me, just once, that all I need. Entwined in finding you one day."  
She repeated playing the melody once more, now starting with the second line. "Ever felt away without me, my love, it lies so deep, ever dream of me ..."  
She stopped, smiling to herself. Had he written it for her?  
Her heart was beating and she decided to continue the text. Her English skills were not that good, but with the help of a dictionary she had soon created a beautiful first line.  
Would you do it with me?  
Heal the scars and change the stars.   
Would you do it for me?  
Turn loose the heaven within ...  
With a beating heart she put the paper into her bag, deciding to give the text to him tomorrow.  
'Maybe he will continue as well', Tarja thought. 'I hope so.'


	7. Chapter 7

At Friday the first snowflakes fell. Tuomas was clad in a winter coat, wondering the whole drive to Helsinki what Tarja would wear today. He had held his word and hadn't studied for the test that Tarja had threatened them with. Somehow he thought he needed to gain her attention with that, needed to show her that he was different.  
He pulled out his music player and looked for a specific song by Metallica - the song where Tarja had told him she loved it as she had looked through his MP3 player.  
So close, no matter how far, couldn't be much more from the heart ... Forever trusting who we are. And nothing else matters.  
Tuomas closed his eyes. How true this was ... His heart was clenching. He needed her so badly.

"Good morning, class", Tarja greeted as she came in.  
"God morning, Miss Turunen", the class answered in a choir, just the way she liked it. She looked around the room and spotted Tuomas.  
'Good. At least he isn't late.'  
"So, let's start another four hour practise, or what do you say?"  
The students nodded, not really happy about this. They hated those practises of singing gamuts and listening to Tarja all the time, when she warmed up her voice, sung ballads, telling them how to breathe and how to posture correctly while they were trying to sing, and then parting into groups to write a song every group of them would perform at the music party in April.  
Tarja put Tuomas in a group where he knew no one but Jule and then she looked at Linn.  
"You can start writing the test, by the way", she told her. "Go back to the classroom, the test is on my desk. Please take it and sit down in the first row. I'll fetch you after ten minutes."  
Linn nodded and did as she had told her.  
Tuomas turned to Jule. "Which music party?", he asked.  
"I don't know", Jule answered. "You have to ask Val and Amy, they are here for a longer time now. I only know that every group has to perform a self-written song. And the parents will come and the whole university will be there as well ... Pretty big thing."  
"That's cool", Tuomas said. "I like writing songs."  
"Then you can write one for us", the boy next to Jule said.  
"I'd love to", Tuomas said honestly. "But only if Jule has a piano solo."  
Jule grew red as everyone agreed.  
Tuomas took the piece of paper and read the words they already had.  
"Doesn't even sound bad", he said. "Does she help you in any way?", Tuomas asked and looked at Tarja, who wore a long, black turtle neck pullover and white trousers by the way (and red lipstick).  
"No", Jule answered.  
"Not at all", the boy from before said. "She is too selfish to help any of us."  
"Then I will help you. I'm a songwriter", Tuomas said.

After ten minutes, Tarja went to the classroom. "Are you done?", she asked.  
"Not yet", Linn said panicking and Tarja pulled the paper away.  
"Sorry, but time is over", she said. "Go and tell Tuomas he can write the test now."  
Linn nodded, silently cursing that beautiful teacher, and went out of the classroom. Tarja looked at the test and shook her head with a smile. That girl was such a slow writer - she hadn't even done the half of the test.  
'Good for her I don't count the test result', Tarja thought. She only needed a certification that the students listened to her, sometimes.  
She sat down on the edge of her desk and pulled the songtext out of her bag. Her heart was beating crazily as she sent a prayer to heaven, begging for Tuomas to continue.  
A few seconds later the young man entered.  
"I'll tell you right away", he said and Tarja's heart jumped. "I haven't studied."  
Tarja's face fell. He was the first one of a class who didn't listen to her - why wasn't she angry?  
"That's not my problem", she answered coldly and crashed the paper down at his desk. "Ten minutes", she said and as he only stared at her (with his beautiful blue eyes), she turned around and went away, swaying her hips from left to right.  
'Goddess, her ass', Tuomas thought and bit his lips. 'Even in such a pullover she is sexy as fuck ...'   
He really didn't care about that stupid test, but he looked at it anyway - and gasped.  
This was not a test.  
It was the song he had started. Ever Dream.  
And she had continued.  
With shaking hands he took the paper and read what she had written. After that, he closed his eyes.  
"The game is on", he whispered.

Tuomas came back five minutes later.  
"Are you already done?", Tarja asked as his challenging look hit her.  
"I told you that I didn't study for it", he said icily and the whole class went quiet, observing this brave man in admiration.  
"And I told you I didn't care", Tarja answered sweetly. "Go to your group now, while I'll correct the test."  
"It's on your desk", Tuomas mouthed and Tarja rushed out of the music room, back to the classroom.  
She immediately saw that he had continued, which made her dance around happily.  
She pressed the text against her chest while she danced around the classroom. Through the paper she could feel her beating heart.  
Slowly she pulled away and read the text that he had added.  
I'd take you away,  
castaway on a lonely day.  
Bosom for a teary cheek,  
my song can but borrow your grace.  
"Wow", Tarja whispered. His English skills were astounding - he had written this beautiful line within five minutes and without a dictionary.  
I'd take you away ...  
Tarja's heart beat even faster as she stuffed the paper back to her bag.  
'Does he love me? Does he want to take me away? Castaway on a lonely day ...'  
Tarja couldn't suppress a smile as she went back to the music room, and Tuomas, who always looked at her as soon as she entered a room, smiled as well as he saw it.

After only an hour Tuomas had created a song. Everyone was astounded by his fantasy, he had thought about the already existing text and the ideas had flown.  
He had asked them for their talents and after writing down a few names and the instruments they played, he had created a band.  
Their members were Jule on the piano, Janne on the guitar, Noah on the drums and Sandra as their singer. After some thinking he added himself as singer as well. They were no jazz or symphonic band, so they didn't need his saxophone or clarinet skills, and Jule did already play the piano, so his piano skills would be useless.  
He asked his 'band' if they already had a melody in mind, and Sandra started humming. Tuomas quickly wrote down the notes she hummed and soon they had a melody for the chorus.  
And this was how Tuomas had grown to be the band leader within only an hour.  
He didn't turn around once, but if he had, he would have seen that Tarja was constantly and only looking at him. She watched every of his move closely, her heart beating excitedly. Never had she seen such a talented, amazing, likeable and beautiful man before. Once again Tarja admired the way he took the lead, probably due to his age. He obviously enjoyed his position, but he was friendly enough not to make the others hate him. He was so grown-up for his age ... So mature.  
Tarja caught herself staring at his lower region, secretly wondering of how he looked naked.  
He shook her head, scolding herself.  
But she couldn't help it ... He was dressed quite good, blue jeans and a belt stayed the same everyday, only his shirts changed. Sometimes button-down shirts with a tie, sometimes plain T-shirts with or without something on it (on Wednesday his shirt had the brand of Nirvana on it), and today he wore a black cotton jacket over a simple white Shirt.  
Tarja smiled again as she thought about his choice of colour - they were the same as hers today.  
She had decided for a turtle-neck pullover, because she felt quite sexy in it. She didn't even have to wear a push up-bra, her breasts looked bigger through the pullover anyway. But she had gotten disappointed, Tuomas hadn't even looked at her ...  
"She is staring", Jule whispered as she and Tuomas were alone, because the others had gone to look for a room to practise.  
"Who?", Tuomas asked lowly, his heartbeat fastening. 'Oh, please ...'  
"Miss Turunen", Jule whispered back. "She's staring at you all the time ... I wanted to tell you earlier but I didn't think of it as a good idea ... Sandra can be quite a bitch."  
"Oh", Tuomas only said. 'Heaven, she is STARING at me??' "How - how does she look like?"  
Jule weighted her head. "Interested", she said and giggled a little. "Oh my god - do you think she has the hots for you??"  
Tuomas only smiled at her. She was so cute with her German accent. "Nah", he said. "I doubt this."  
But in real he thought 'I hope so!!'  
"But look", Jule whispered again and Tuomas turned around.  
His blue eyes met the green ones and within a second Tarja looked away, her face deep red.  
"She did look at you!", Jule whispered excitedly and grinned madly. She tried to seek for Tuomas' eyes, but he hid his face behind his long hair.  
And Jule knew - he was deep red as well.  
"Okay", she whispered and swore herself not to tell a single soul about this - not even Sabrina and Cornelia.

'Shit ... He has noticed. And Jule has noticed as well. Shit. SHIT! What am I supposed to do??'  
She was pretending as if she was writing. From time to time she threw a look to the table that Tuomas was sitting at, but the only one who looked back was Jule. And every time Tarja looked at Tuomas again, Jule whispered something to him.  
'I'm so screwed. I hope she doesn't tell anyone ... If principal Nieminen finds out, I'll have to quit!'  
Tears jumped into her eyes when she thought of quitting. She actually loved that job, even though it was very stressful to be the mean teacher, she enjoyed scaring the shit out of her students.  
And if she quit, she would never see Tuomas again ...  
'Get yourself together, you've only known him for a week!', the devil on her left shoulder said angrily.  
'But you're in love!', the angel on her right shoulder said kindly. 'Love is beautiful ... You should seize it.'  
'Shut up, both of you', Tarja thought and the imagined angel and devil disappeared. Inside her mind she knew that both of them were right - she had only known him for a week. But love was beautiful, the way she felt when she was thinking of him ...  
For a moment she forgot that this love was impossible, forbidden, illegal - she forgot that she was the teacher and he was her student. She forgot that she was almost ten years older.  
She closed her eyes and thought back of Tuesday evening, the two wonderful hours she had spent with him. Got closer to him.  
Fallen in love with him.  
Tarja opened her eyes again and now she looked at Tuomas directly. Jule immediately whispered something to him again, but she ignored it.  
Tuomas turned around slowly and once again Tarja's eyes met those beautiful, blue orbs.  
Her green eyes made him go crazy, but he looked back. He needed to tell her what he felt, somehow, and he didn't care that Jule noticed this exchange of looks.  
For a few seconds she only looked at him and he only looked back - until Tarja noticed that she was holding a breath.  
She broke the eye contact with reaching down and pulling the songtext out of her bag.  
With a racing heart she put her pen on the paper and continued.  
Come out, come out, wherever you are,  
so lost in your sea ...


	8. Chapter 8

Never had Tuomas hated the start of a weekend like this before. The second Tarja wished her class a nice weekend, he missed her madly.  
He threw a last look at her before she left the classroom, his heart clenching as if someone had taken his reason to live.  
'Now she is gone. I bet she will go out this night, hitting on guys. God, how I hate this ... Why does she have to be so beautiful? She could have a man on every finger ...'  
"Are you okay?", a soft voice asked and as he looked up, he looked right into Jule's worried face.  
"Yes", he answered lowly. "I'm ... fine."  
Jule nodded slowly. She had noticed the sad look as she told them the practise was over and now she was sure that he felt something for her. She had figured as she had seen his red face after their exchange of looks, but now she knew for sure.  
As Jule wanted to say something, someone grabbed her arms from the left and the right and pulled her back.  
Cornelia and Linn put her in the middle of them, starting to talk about nothing that Tuomas cared about.  
He had just stuffed his things back into his bag, when suddenly Linn stood in front of him.  
"Wanna go out tonight?", she asked. "A few friends are coming and I thought it would be cool if you came as well."  
"Who is coming?", Tuomas asked with a doubting look. He gladly could do without the girls.  
Linn had noticed his look and now chuckled. "Only Valerie and Amy, but Amy will bring her best friend along. In the Rockhouse we'll maybe meet the German clique, then."  
"I don't know ...", Tuomas started, but suddenly he ripped open his eyes. "The Rockhouse?? In Helsinki??"  
"We go there every Friday", Linn said and Tuomas lifted up his bagpack.  
'Maybe I'll meet her! Maybe ... Maybe I can check on her, check that she doesn't go with a wrong man. A raper or killer ... Strange how I want to protect her.'  
"I'm thinking of it, okay? I'll tell you after Finnish."  
"Why do you go to Finnish?", Linn whined.  
Tuomas lifted up his shoulders, pretending as if there was no reason, but in real there was.  
He wanted to have a good graduation to impress her. He wanted to start a good job to impress her.  
Tuomas noticed how quickly his life had changed, suddenly he was building his life around her.  
Linn sighed and turned around, while Tuomas followed Cornelia to Finnish.  
"Do you want to sit next to me?", the young girl asked a little shyly and Tuomas answered with a polite nod.  
They went to the classroom together and chose a seat more in the back.  
"Your voice is really good, by the way", Tuomas told her and the blonde blushed. "When I found out that we have to part into groups, I hoped that I would be in yours. I would have found a song fitting for your voice immediately."  
"Sandra is a good singer as well", Cornelia tried to cheer him up and Tuomas sighed.  
"Miss Turunen doesn't think so."  
"Miss Turunen likes no one's voice!", Cornelia spat and then she smiled at Tuomas. "If you ever need help with a text, show me. My roots are British."  
"Oh, great!", Tuomas called and then went on more quiet, because the teacher entered. "I'll keep it in mind."

Tuomas had a whole lesson to think of the invitation and at the end of it he decided to come.  
If Tarja wasn't there he would be both sad and relieved (sad because she wouldn't see her and relieved because she wouldn't be there to go home with a man), so he had no idea if he should hope for her to show up or not.  
Linn waited for him with a big grin and Tuomas sighed.  
She would be so charming if she wasn't so annoying ...  
"And??", she asked and as Tuomas walked past her, she ran after him, not stopping to ask "And? And??"  
"Oh my god, yes, Linn I'll come!", he finally groaned and Linn jumped in the air, unseen by him.  
"But when? And where? And where do I sleep?"  
"Eh, Amy and Leonie will come at seven, so it would be great if you also came around that time ... And you can sleep at mine and Val's apartment", Linn offered.  
"You gals have an apartment?"  
"For the weekend", Linn explained. "For parties, but also for quiet time when we have to study. In fact it belongs to Val."  
"Ah", Tuomas only said. "Well, you have to tell me where you live and then I'll come."  
Tuomas had no idea what he had done with that, fact was - Linn's hands shook madly as she wrote down the address of hers and Valerie's apartment.

The girls had welcomed him heartily and first wanted to show him around the apartment. Tuomas put his school bag down and let them show their apartment to him. It was quite small but enough for two young women (and enough place to throw a party) - it only had one bedroom, though.  
"I'm sorry, but you will have to sleep on the couch", Valerie said. "Linn and I share a room and if I offer to sleep on the couch ... Well, yeah."  
"Maybe you won't even come home tonight!", Amy said and elbowed the dark haired girl with the glasses, who grew deep red.  
Linn, Leonie and Amy were laughing about their blushing friend, while Tuomas didn't even think about it any longer. His mind had already drifted away, to the beautiful dark haired woman ... God, her eyes were killing him even when he only thought about them.  
His heart made a jump when a picture crossed his mind - her legs wrapped around his middle, her fingers running through his hair, her naked, sweaty chest pressing against his, her warm, wet tongue dancing with his ...  
"Tuo? Are you okay?"  
Amy was shaking him softly and Tuomas nodded. "I'm only a little tired. I walked through the city all day long."  
"Oh, I forgot you live so far away", Linn said. "Sorry."  
"It's okay", Tuomas said and suddenly the party started when Valerie and Leonie carried the alcohol into the living room.

The Rockhouse was even more filled than it had been on Tuesday. The music was good (as always, probably), but Tarja was nowhere in sight.  
They arrived at ten, Tuomas madly hoped that Tarja would go out longer than half past ten at weekends.  
Sabrina, Jule, Cia, Lucinda and Cornelia where already there when they arrived.  
The German clique, that was how Linn had called them.  
Tuomas tried to be close to one of them all the time, so he wouldn't get lost, but looking for her at the same time. With a drink in his hand - and a madly turning head - he went after Amy and Leonie, until he decided to talk a little to Valerie.  
He looked for them, but only found Linn talking to Cia.  
"Where is Valerie?", he asked and put his drink on the table.  
"Uh ...", Cia said and started to look around the bar. "Somewhere ... There. In the corner."  
"With Jack", Linn said and the girls started to giggle.  
"So that's what you meant, maybe she won't come home tonight", Tuomas chuckled. "Does she go home with lots of men?"  
The girl shook their heads. "Only Jack", Linn said.  
"It's quite cute, he waits for her every week", Cia said. "Once we went without her and when he saw that she wasn't with us, he went home. They love each other but are too shy to tell the other."  
"So they met here?", Tuomas asked. "In the bar?"  
"Yes, they met here for the first time", Linn answered. "Val first thought he would be a one-night-fling after they kissed, but he waited for her every Friday ..."  
"So romantic", Cia sighed and Tuomas smiled lightly.  
'Maybe I was wrong', he thought. 'Maybe you can meet your true love in a bar ... Oh my god - there she is!'  
His heart almost stood still as he saw her.  
She was waiting at the bar, waiting for her drink to arrive.  
Suddenly he was sweating.  
"What is this?", he asked nervously and pointed at Cia's drink.  
"Caipirinha I think", Cia answered and Tuomas grabbed the drink, gulping it down within two seconds. "I'll buy you a new one", he promised the girl and Cia shrugged. "It was Val's anyway."  
Tuomas looked at Tarja, not knowing what to do. She was alone. Should he go and talk to her?  
No, he couldn't. If he would be here alone, sure, but ...  
She looked so stunning.  
Her hair was wavy and her charcoal dress was short. She wore a white jacket over it and high heeled boots.  
'I have to go to her - she won't be alone for a long time!'  
He didn't even say a word to Cia and Linn, slowly he approached her ... And froze when a good looking stranger was faster and started talking to her.  
And she was laughing and smiling at him, until he pulled her in a light hug and they started to dance, she was holding her drink in her one hand, her other hand was on his back ... Tuomas got sick when he saw how his hands caressed her waist and hips ...   
He quickly turned around.  
"Where did you want to go?", Cia asked.  
"I thought I had seen someone I know", Tuomas mumbled.  
"If you talk about Miss Turunen, she's really here. She's here every Friday", Cia said and giggled. "She's a little slut, she leaves with different men every week."  
"I would do too if I had her looks", Linn said and glared at Cia. "Don't call her a slut!"  
Cia wanted to say something, but Tuomas prevented her from that by pulling Linn to her feet.  
"Wanna dance?", he asked and Linn beamed at him.  
"Yeah!"  
They had lots of fun while dancing, they laughed and talked a lot. Tuomas always kept sure that they were close to Tarja and the man, so she would maybe see them.  
And she did.  
Her heart had made a jump when she had seen him, her first thought had been that he maybe came only because of her.  
But when the man (who's name she had already forgotten again) started to pull her in a hug and on the dance floor, he suddenly went to a group of girls and she knew - he had came with his friends. With Linn.  
The second she had noticed Linn, he had already pulled the blonde girl in a hug and they started swaying over to the dance floor, pretty close to them.  
Tarja bit her lip, trying not to stare at them all the time. But they seemed so comfortable ...  
Tarja froze when the man's lips touched (and gently bit) her throat. She didn't felt erected, to be honest, she wasn't in the mood for this today ... But she noticed that Tuomas looked over to her and placed his hands on Linn's waist, so Tarja leaned her head back to give the man a better access in kissing her.  
She didn't even say something as the man's hand suddenly was beneath her dress, between her legs and started massaging her through her panties - she said nothing, even though she normally didn't like those kind of things (when they were still in the bar).  
Tuomas had noticed that the man's hand had disappeared beneath Tarja's dress, but he didn't dare to do the same with Linn. But instead of that, he cupped her face, threw a last, quick look at Tarja (she was looking at them) and then laid his lips on Linn's softly.  
The cheering that went through the crowd of Linn's friends didn't reflect Tarja's feeling for a moment - her heart broke when the young man kissed the blonde girl.  
"Sorry", she mumbled and pushed the man away, biting back her tears. She got out of the bar quickly, finally letting the tears flow.

The kiss didn't last long and it didn't grow - but as Tuomas looked up and looked for Tarja, she was gone.


	9. Chapter 9

Tuomas awoke with an aching head. He sighed quietly but let his eyes closed - until he noticed that someone was next to him.  
He sat up, ripping his eyes open, and stared into the face of a smiling Linn.  
"Morning, beautiful man", she said a little shy and Tuomas noticed with a shock that she wore nothing besides her underwear. His chest was naked as well.  
Beautiful man ...  
"Did we - did we - have - did it?", he asked, not able to form proper sentences. But Linn shook her head, understanding.  
"No. We only were drunk. Pretty bad, we immediately went to bed."  
"Oh", Tuomas said. "Good. I wouldn't feel good if I slept with someone drunk."  
"I wouldn't have let you anyway", Linn admitted and then added quietly, "I want to remember my first time and now I can't remember anything of tonight."  
'I know what you mean', Tuomas thought, not telling her that he still was a virgin as well. He simply smiled at her and Linn smiled back.  
"Well", Tuomas then said. "Can I leave you alone? I need to get home."  
Linn looked a little disappointed at first but then she looked confused. "Where's Val?"  
"I think she left with Jack", Tuomas said with a grin and Linn clapped her hands excitedly. "Good god, that's amazing!", she screamed. "I need to call Amy."  
"No need", a sudden voice chuckled from not far away and Tuomas caught Amy leaning against the doorframe.  
"Did you sleep here?", Linn asked confused and Amy nodded.  
"Both Leonie and I did. You invited us, forgot that?"  
While the girls started discussing, Tuomas left the bed, a blanket wrapped around him. After he had grabbed his clothes, he went past Amy and Leonie, who stood behind her best friend, and went to the bathroom. He quickly dressed himself, trying not to think about Tarja.  
When he got out, he thanked Linn for the invitation and left the apartment. As he sat down in the bus, he finally allowed his thoughts to flow.  
'Thank god I didn't sleep with Linn. It would have been my first time as well ... How embarrassing. I'm almost twenty-one!'  
He switched the music louder.  
'But maybe I should look for a girlfriend ... Linn seems really nice and appropriate. And she's pretty. If I wait for my true love to take my virginity, I'll die as a virgin. After all it's Tarja who has stolen my heart. Tarja is my true love ... If I wait for her, I will wait forever.'

Tarja put her empty mug into the sink, sighing heavily.  
Her night had been a bad night, first she had cried herself to sleep, then she had awoken for several times, due of several nightmares. The worst one had awoken her around three, when a dream-Tuomas had announced his and Linn's engagement.  
"Admit it", Tarja whispered to herself as she rinsed the mug. "You're in love with him. So many years of looking for your true love, and now it happens to be your student." She shook her head. "I shouldn't have gone out with him."  
The moment he had called her "big sister" she had been simply shocked. He had told her that he had seen them and it had hurt him.  
Then he had called her a slut. Which had either meant that he really thought she was a slut (which she doubted) or that it had hurt him watching them making out. Which seemed to be more reliable.  
But then, when she had already thought that every chance was gone, he had given her the book, she had longed for.  
And she had found a text in it, a text so beautiful, it could also be a song.  
Tarja unfolded the piece of paper, which was always somewhere near her, and gently read the next words he had written within a few minutes and the continuation she had tried to write.  
Ever felt away with me, just once, that all I need. Entwined in finding you one day.  
Ever felt away without me? My love, it lies so deep. Ever dream of me.  
Would you do it with me, heal the scars and change the stars?  
Would you do it for me? Turn loose the heaven within.  
I'd take you away, castaway on a lonely day.  
Bosom for a teary cheek, my song can but borrow your grace.  
Come out, come out wherever you are, so lost in your sea!  
Tarja put the pen on the paper, slowly forming the next words, carefully, not wanting to destroy the whole meaning.  
Give in, give in for my touch, she wrote with shaking hands. For my taste, for my lust.  
She read the sentence again.  
Give in, give in for my touch, for my taste, for my lust.  
"That is ...", she whispered and tears welled up in her eyes. "If he doesn't get what I want from him - after that line ..." She shook her head and placed herself in front of her piano, starting to play the melody she had written down on an extra piece of paper.  
"Ever felt away with me ... Just once, that all I need", she sung, her voice full of feelings. In her mind she imagined violins playing in the background, fitting to the piano and her voice. "Ever felt away without me? My love, it lies so deep!", she sang, her voice bursting with feelings. She almost screamed out of hurt and love. "Ever dream of me ...", she added more quietly, before she stopped playing and broke together on the piano, wave after wave of sobs shaking her body.

"Ladies and gentlemen, I'm sorry to tell you this, but the train to Kitee will be delayed. It will arrive in ten minutes."  
"Honestly?", Tuomas sighed and sat down again.   
It happened almost everyday, the train to Kitee got delayed. On Thursday it had been half an hour too late.  
He pulled out his book again and went on reading where he had stopped.  
LYSANDER  
How now, my love! Why is your cheek so pale? How chance the roses there do fade so fast?  
HERMIA  
Belike for want of rain, which I could well beteem them from the tempest of my eyes.  
LYSANDER  
Ay me! for aught that I could ever read, could ever hear by tale or history -  
His reading got interrupted by a piece of paper that fell in his book from above - and Tuomas recognised it immediately.  
It was Ever Dream ...  
With a gasp he turned around and looked right into her sad yet beautiful face.  
"Hi", he whispered and Tarja smiled at him sadly.  
"Hi", she whispered back. "I ... I continued."  
Tuomas took a look at the last line, his eyes widening as he read them. "Miss Turunen ... Wow", he mumbled. "You're a wonderful songwriter."  
"So are you", Tarja said with a light smile and crossed the seats, sitting down next to him. "What are you reading?"  
"Shakespeare", Tuomas answered quietly, making Tarja smile.  
"Now I know where you have your talent from", she said. "I really admire your interest in this strange language. I'm so bad in it ..."  
Tuomas smiled shyly. "Do you ... Do you want me to continue?"  
"Only if you want to", Tarja answered. "I don't know when you intended it to stop, you started it after all ..."  
"Yes ... I'll write one more line and then it's done", Tuomas decided and folded the paper, put it between the pages he was currently reading and closed the book. "How did you find me?"  
"Luck", Tarja said. "I thought you had to drive home today, so I waited here until you walked past my car ..."  
"So you did see me yesterday", Tuomas whispered and Tarja nodded.  
"You know ... It's none of your business", she mumbled then. "But on Tuesday ... That - that man ..."  
Tuomas looked away. Why did she want to talk about it now??  
"I didn't sleep with him", Tarja whispered and Tuomas' head shot up.  
"What?"  
"I ... I had a bad conscience ... You were so right, Tuomas. I won't find my true love in a bar! I recognised while we kissed, so I dumped him. Before something could happen. He didn't even touch my car seats."  
"That's the right attitude", Tuomas said with a relieved smile. They hadn't slept together!! She was no slut!  
"Yes", Tarja said and smiled back. "But one thing I don't understand ..."  
"Tell me", Tuomas offered and then admitted, "I like talking to you ..."  
Tarja's heart beat crazily as he said that, but her smile slowly faded. "Does this only count for elder people? For those like me?"  
"Why do you ask that?", Tuomas asked, his heart clenching. He knew what she meant ...  
"Well ... Are younger people allowed to have their fun, kiss other teens and go home with them, while elder people are forced to find their true loves? Tell me." Her voice sounded bitter and he noticed that she had tears in her eyes.  
"Linn and I didn't sleep together", Tuomas said and Tarja gasped quietly. Tuomas smiled. "It's also none of your business, though ... But I'm really looking for my true love." 'I've found it', he thought. 'You.' "I kissed her because I was drunk, Miss Turunen. But I'm still a virgin, so I would have never slept with her drunk ..."  
He went quiet after he confessed, but Tarja didn't answer. She was too happy about his confession, and so was he.  
"Ladies and gentlemen, the train to Kitee is arriving on rail 2."  
Tuomas stood up and so did Tarja.  
"See you on Monday, then", Tarja said and Tuomas nodded.  
"See you", he said and as the train came to stand, Tarja surprised him by taking his hand.  
A short, electric shock went through his whole body, followed by a shiver that went down his spine. He felt goosebumps erupt on his arms as the woman touched him.  
They shook hands a little helplessly, but then their eyes met. Tuomas saw so much warmth in those beautiful, green orbs of hers, wondering if this warmth was directed to him ...  
"I need to go", he whispered and pulled his hand out of hers, his heart aching. "See you on Monday, Miss Turunen ..."  
Tarja nodded quietly. She didn't say a word when he left her, turned around and entered the train.  
She wanted to scream, wanted to shout "STAY WITH ME", grab him, pull him back, kiss him, pull him towards her car ...  
Her stomach turned around as she thought of the same lips kissing her as those, which had kissed the blonde girl yesterday (of course she just had to be blonde).  
"See you", she croaked, but she doubted that he had heard her.  
She watched him sit down at the window and smiled back, as he gave her a way smile. But her heart ached.  
He was the most perfect, amazing, beautiful, handsome, mature and interesting male creature she had ever met. Why did he have to be her student?  
'Oh, Tari. What did you do? You fell in love with him.'  
Tuomas was going through similar feelings, though his heart wasn't clenching but beating madly.  
He wasn't ashamed to be in love with her, it didn't feel wrong. It felt so right. He didn't care about the fact that she was his teacher and almost ten years older (nine and a half). He trusted her and he trusted her to find a solution for this love.  
And he knew that she was feeling something similar, she had to. Why on earth would she seek for him, if he was only a student to her? Why on earth would she have left as he had kissed Linn? Why else had she been relieved if he had told her that he was still a virgin? And she would have never told him that she hadn't slept with that tall man, if she wasn't feeling something similar, no doubt.  
Slowly he pulled out A midsummer night's dream and opened the page in which he songtext, Ever Dream, was hiding.  
Give in, give in for my touch, for my taste, for my lust, was the last she had written.  
His heart was beating so crazily, he was afraid it was about to jump out of his chest.  
For my touch ... For my taste ... For my lust ...  
Tuomas pressed the paper against his chest, ignoring the doubting looks that other passengers gave him.  
'I'm in love, let me be', he thought and closed his eyes. 'I'm in love with Tarja ... with Miss Turunen. Miss Tarja Turunen ... My beautiful Tari, my queen.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Book reference: William Shakespeare - A midsummer night's dream.]


	10. Chapter 10

"A week university and you've been gone for two nights already", Tuomas' mother chuckled as her son entered the house.  
"I know, but university life is different than normal life", he said, a broad grin forming in his face.  
"How was it?", Kirsti asked and nudged her son's lower arm, the highest part she could reach with her elbow.  
"Huh? How was what?", Tuomas asked confusedly and sat down at the table. The only thing he could think of was Tarja. Tarja, Tarja, Tarja, Tarja. How she had looked at him. How she had touched him ...  
"The party?", Kirsti asked, not less confused. "I thought that girl from your ME class invited you to it?"  
"Oh", Tuomas said. "Oh yeah. That was ... Fine. I guess. Different than parties in Kitee." He let out a short laugh and Kirsti placed a plate with Tuomas' food in front of her son.  
"Different?"  
"More ... More girls than boys", Tuomas said and forced himself not to laugh, since he had been the only boy at this 'party'.  
"So you found yourself a girl?", Kirsti asked with a wink and Tuomas let his fork fell on the plate.  
"M - mother!", he said shocked, his face deep red.  
"Oh my god, you did!", Kirsti screamed and Tuomas shook his head.  
"No!", he shouted and glared at his laughing mother.  
"Why not?", Kirsti laughed.  
"There is no girl I like", he muttered, his face still red. 'True, she's a WOMAN.'  
"Then why is your face red?", Kirsti asked and Tuomas sighed.  
"Okay ... I admit", he said quietly, looking down at his plate. "There is ... someone I feel attracted to ..."  
"A girl?", Kirsti asked, lifting an eyebrow.  
'No, mum, a woman.' "Yes, of course a girl. And I think, well, hope she likes me back."  
Kirsti let out a squeal and hugged her son. "You're in love!"  
"I am", Tuomas muttered.  
"Tell me everything! Her name, her looks -"  
"I won't tell you anything as long as there's nothing between us", Tuomas said and Kirsti let go of him.  
"Tell me at least a class you have in common."  
"Music Education", Tuomas said and Kirsti grinned at him with a knowing look.  
She was sure it had to be exactly the girl he had talked about so often already, Linn was her name. Everyday he had told her about that girl who seemed to never shut up. And then he had agreed to come to her party!  
Kirsti smiled and patted her son's shoulder. "She would be crazy if she didn't like you back", she said and Tuomas smiled at his mother thankfully, not aware of that Kirsti thought about a completely different girl than Tuomas did.  
They talked a little about college and the upcoming mother-teacher conference in February, where Kirsti could finally meet his teachers.  
"And I'll finally meet that 'gorgeous devil' you told me about", Kirsti said. "I'm very thrilled."  
Tuomas smiled weakly. 'Gorgeous devil ... Oh, if mother only knew that behind the mask the most wonderful woman hides herself ... If anyone knew! I'm so happy I'm the only one who knows. It's like a secret we share ...'  
"Where did you sleep last night?", Kirsti suddenly asked.  
"Hm? Oh, in the hotel room I already slept in last Tuesday", Tuomas lied.  
"Alone?", Kirsti asked and Tuomas stood up.  
"That's it, I'll continue in my room."  
"It was only a question!", Kirsti shouted.  
"But it's my life and you cling yourself on it as if it was yours", Tuomas said angrily.  
"I just wanted to know if my son is active -"  
"MOM!", Tuomas shouted, now bursting into laughter. "I am almost twenty-one, I'm an adult! Please, can we skip the embarrassing talk??"  
"If you're oh so adult, why are those talks embarrassing to you?", Kirsti countered and Tuomas glared at her.  
Active.  
"That's it. Bye", he snorted and grabbed his plate, carrying it upstairs.  
Active!  
He shook his head. His mother was unbelievable!  
He sighed, why had he told his mother that he felt attracted to a girl??  
"Woman, she's a woman", Tuomas mumbled and felt his cheeks go red. Oh, what a woman she was. He had never seen someone like her before ...  
He smiled as he remembered her long legs and broad hips (compared to her slim figure), her well formed ass swaying in the short mini skirt, her thin waist and the deep cut out of her blouse, that gave him a great view into her cleavage ...  
He shoved the plate away and pulled out the paper that had been changing between them the last days. He read the last lines once again before he was sure which last line to add.  
"Come out, come out wherever you are", he read loudly. "So lost in your sea. Give in, give in for my touch, for my taste, for my lust."  
He breathed in and out once more before he put his pen on the piece of paper and wrote the lines that had been flowing through his mind ever since she had touched him at the railway station.  
Your beauty cascaded on me, in this white night fantasy, he wrote, hoping she would get that it was her beauty, that left him back completely speechless and with a beating heart.  
With a smile he added something above the whole text, with his calligraphy skill he wrote a beautiful 'Ever Dream' at the head of he sheet.  
With shaking hands he folded it and put it in an envelope, carefully closing it.  
After some struggle he wrote "For Tarja" on the front side. It felt wonderful to write her name ...  
He smiled as his fingers trailed the letters of her name.  
He opened the small drawer at the bottom of his desk and pulled out the little notebook he had used in vocational school.  
He flipped to the next free page, where he wrote Tarja's name for felt fifty times.  
As soon as the double page was full with "Tarja", he put the notebook away, closing his eyes.  
'What if she doesn't like me back?', he suddenly asked himself. 'What if that's just my great imagination? Yes, she touched my hand ... That doesn't necessarily have to mean something ...'  
He rubbed his hurting eyes. 'Don't cry. If she doesn't feel for you, she's not worth it ...'  
But he abrogated his own thoughts by letting the tears flow. He shook his head desperately. Never had he cried because of a girl or woman, but since he had met this woman, he cried without a break.

"Ever felt away with me", Tarja sung quietly while putting her dishes in the dishwasher. "Just once, that all I need ... Entwined in finding you one day ..." Tarja smiled and added "Tuomas" with a soft whisper.  
When she closed her eyes she could see his icy blue eyes in front if her. If she wanted to, she could recall the feeling of his skin, as his hands had laid in hers. When she called herself his scent in mind, she could smell it.  
She whispered his name again, a smile on her lips.  
It was unbelievable that she had only met him not even a week ago, and now she craved for him. So much, that she couldn't even bring other men in her house and have some fun! He had changed her through only one talk, a deep talk, telling her how important it was to find her one and only and how impossible it was to find him in a bar.  
He had opened her eyes concerning her love life, concerning that it wasn't good to bring home man after man (maybe it wasn't healthy either). And, Tarja couldn't forget this, Tuomas had asked if her ex-boyfriend had been blind as she had told him that he had found her fat and ugly.  
"If you only knew", Tarja sighed as she walked towards her bedroom, sliding out of her bathrobe, letting it fall to the floor.  
She trailed her hands down at her side, caressing her waist with her finger.  
With a quick move of her hand she turned off the lights, leaving her dark bedroom only lightened by the lights from outside.  
Slowly she stepped towards the balcony doors, her look upon the lights of Helsinki.  
"Tuomas ...", she sighed. "I wish you were here with me right now ..."  
One of her hands trailed along her collarbones, slowly creeping down between her breasts, while her other hand stroke along the curve of her hips, teasing herself. She imagined a heavier, firmer hand grasping her hip, caressing it. It was his hand, if course it was him. She couldn't stop thinking of him.  
Her breath got caught in her throat as she thought about him curling a finger into neckline of her lingerie. She let herself believe it was him, peeling it from her body slowly. The thought of him caressing every sensitive part of her made her close her eyes, her lips slightly apart from each other. "Tuo - mas ...", she breathed as she ran her hand along her inner thighs, now imagining it was him, who parted her legs.  
But then she opened her eyes again, slightly groaning in frustration.  
"I can't do this!", she cried desperately and pulled her panty up again, before she let herself fall on her bed with an exhausted sigh.  
Never had she hesitated to do this, before. Never had she been ashamed to do this, to please herself, but today, while thinking of Tuomas ...  
She wished he was with her. And the fact that he had changed her idea of love made her hesitate to masturbate while thinking of him, it made her feel ashamed.  
"That's just inappropriate", she mumbled to herself and pressed her pillow against her face. "He's your student!", she groaned into it. "Your student and nothing else! Stop thinking of him! Stop!"  
But Tarja couldn't stop thinking of him. After an hour of trying, she fell asleep, a quiet sighed "Tuomas" on her lips.  
She couldn't remember her dream the next day, but she was quite sure it had been about him.

Tuomas rubbed his eyes and yawned. Desperately he tried to catch the dream, but it was slipping through his fingers slowly. But he had dreamt about Tarja, that he could remember.  
She had sung ... She had sung Ever Dream. Only for him.  
Tuomas stood up and walked to the bathroom, not sure if he was still asleep. He was too tired, to even think of it.  
'Funny', he thought. 'Even though I'm too tired to think about anything, my first thoughts are about her. Gosh, I must be obsessed.'  
He splashed some cold water into his face, praying that it would help something. After he was awake, he looked into the mirror and decided to go to bed again.  
'This is useless', he thought. 'I look like a piece of shit. I better go back to bed, today's not worth it.'  
But as he wanted to go back to his room, a young, blonde woman grabbed his arm.  
"Tuo!", she said excitedly and pulled him into a quick hug. "How are you?"  
Tuomas rubbed his eyes, not sure if he saw right. "Susanna??", he then called and hugged his sister. "What are you doing here?? Oh my god!"  
"I am here to show you this", Susanna said happily and waved with her right hand, on which a delicate, golden ring was glinting.  
"Oh my -", Tuomas gasped and grabbed his sister's hand. "Are you - are you and Kai engaged??"  
"Yes!!", Susanna squealed and Tuomas hugged her.  
"Congratulations!", Tuomas breathed. "When is the wedding??"  
"May tenth", Susanna said beaming. "I hope you'll bring that girl of yours." Susanna winked and Tuomas got red.  
"Did mother tell you?", he mumbled and Susanna laughed.  
"No one but you told me", Susanna giggled and Tuomas rolled his eyes. How typical of her. "Anyway", Susanna continued. "You'll bring her along?"  
"We'll see", Tuomas said. Tarja escorting him to his sister's wedding? Never. "When did he purpose?", he asked quickly, to prevent her from asking more about 'his girl'. "And how?"  
"He purposed Friday a week ago, and the story how he did is a little longer story", Susanna said with another giggle. "I'll tell all of you today at lunch."  
"Great", Tuomas said, relieved that she had obviously forgotten about that mysterious girl of him. He prayed to god that no one would ask him about her further. What should he say?  
"She is my teacher and love of my life"?


	11. Chapter 11

"Good morning, class."  
She sounded a little stressed as she came in and looked into the classroom. Her look hung on Tuomas a little longer than on everyone else, but not too much to say it was noticeable.  
Tuomas smiled at her and she replied gently, making everyone else wonder if she maybe had a good day.  
"Are you done with your songs?"  
Everyone nodded and Tarja clapped her hands. "Great! Write your names on it and bring them to me."  
"I'll do that for our group", Tuomas said as Jule turned around to look at him, and after he had told her, she nodded and pulled out the songtext, handing it to Tuomas.  
Jule, Tuomas wrote and thought about who else was in his group. Sandra, Janne, Noah, Tuomas.  
He put the last part of Ever Dream beneath the sheet of paper without Linn noticing and brought it to the teacher's desk a little later than everyone else.  
As Tarja looked up and saw, who was bringing the last songtext, her heart jumped.  
He smiled at her and she replied with a little smirk. "Done with the texts?", she asked, meaning both the one for school and their private exchange.  
"Sure", Tuomas answered with a sexy growl and Tarja's cheeks blushed a little when she thought back of what she had almost done on Saturday ...  
"Well, then", she said and Tuomas gave the sheets to her. "Thank you."  
"Thank you, Miss Turunen", Tuomas said, so quiet, that no one of the others could heart it.  
But Tarja had heard it, and her heart was fluttering like crazy as their eyes met.  
'He is so beautiful. Gosh, his eyes! I could drown in them ... His hair ... His body ... Gosh, I could jump at him and -'  
Tarja tore her eyes away with a deep blush, while Tuomas simply turned around and walked back to his desk with a poker face.  
On his inside, though, there was a tornado washing through his body.  
'She blushed twice! She asked me if I was done with Ever Dream! Well, not directly, but she meant it. We had eye contact! She is so beautiful and perfect ... I wish I could just grab her and kiss her ...'  
"You haven't even said hello", Linn suddenly said as he sat down.  
"What?", Tuomas asked and stared at the girl with a confused look.  
"As I greeted you in the morning, you haven't replied. And since then you're ignoring me. Did I do something wrong?"  
"No", Tuomas said. "I'm sorry, I had my head somewhere in the clouds." 'I've only been thinking of Tarja since a week ... And what she told me at the railway station ...'  
"And, what do you say?"  
"Huh?"  
"Of what are you thinking, Tuo?? I asked you, if you want to go to the cinema with me today after our courses", Linn asked again.  
Tuomas wanted to answer that he didn't know yet, as suddenly her voice reached his ear like the lash of a whip.  
"Miss Barnelinen and Mr. Holopainen! Always you two! I guess I have to seperate you. Tuomas and Sandra, you two change your places, please."  
Tuomas heard a grumpy noise from both Sandra and Linn, but he couldn't care less. His heart was racing as he sat down in the first row, only a few metres away from the most beautiful creature on earth.  
He couldn't concentrate when she talked, the only thing he could think of was the way she moved her lips while she talked ...  
She seemed to notice that he was staring at her, she didn't ask him a single question, but smiled at him from time to time.  
Tuomas was on cloud nine. Could this wonderful, wonderful person feel the same for him? Could that be possible?  
If she did, she didn't show. Her eyes rested on him every now and then, but that was everything ...  
She looked stunning today. Well, she always looked stunning, but she looked even more stunning when she smiled like she did today.  
And after she was done with telling her class about a certain work order, it was completely quiet in the class. The other pupils were working, but Tuomas just couldn't tear his eyes from her.  
He observed her as she took the songtexts in her wonderful, slim hands (Tuomas blushed a little as he imagined what they could do with him) and looked for something specific.  
Finally she had found it, and after she was done reading, she lifted her look up. First she checked if someone was watching - and then she looked directly at him.  
Her lips were curling into a beautiful smile and Tuomas smiled back straightly.  
'You like it?', he formed with his lips and Tarja seemed to understand.  
She nodded, a small blush creeping over her cheeks.  
Tarja's heart was racing madly. Those words.  
Those words.  
She couldn't get over their perfectness.  
Your beauty cascaded on me in this white night fantasy ...  
But what did they mean? Did he feel for her?  
Everyone was working, so Tarja used the moment to smile at the young man, who had been looking at her for the last ten minutes. He smiled back.  
After a quiet exchange of looks (and unspoken words), she again checked if someone was watching her.  
Nobody was (besides Tuomas), so she looked back at the black haired.  
And winked at him.  
Tuomas felt a flash shoot through his body as she winked at him.  
'Did she just -?! No, it can't be.'  
But she didn't stop smiling at him, so Tuomas winked back, smiling as well.  
Her blush deepened and slowly she let her hand wander up to her hair, striking it behind her ear.  
Tuomas watched her moves with a dry mouth.  
'How sexy she is ... I've never thought that someone could be sexy while striking his hair out of his face ... But she is. And now she does the same with the other side ... Wow, her ears are stunning. I wonder about the way she would moan while I bite and lick them ...'  
That was too much. Tuomas lowered his head to stare at the work order (not able to concentrate, though).  
He desperately tried to think of something that would prevent him from getting harder than he already was.  
Tarja's heart was beating. He had blushed so deeply has she had begun striking her hair behind her ears. What had he thought about? About kissing her neck?  
'Don't flatter yourself. You're not THAT beautiful to make a student fall for you', Tarja thought and shook her head. She couldn't deny that she wished it ... Somehow she knew that a man like him was the perfect man for her. But sadly he was the only man she knew, who was like that. Did that mean that him, really him and only him, was perfect for her?  
Tarja saw that Tuomas slowly lifted up his head again and Tarja smiled at him once again.  
Your beauty cascaded on me ...  
Did that mean something?  
Tarja wanted to cry when the bell rang that announced the end of the course. While everyone rushed out of the room, Tuomas packed his stuff extra slow. Tarja noticed that he did that on purpose, so she leaned back and pulled out Summer of elves.  
While she pretended as if she was reading, she only waited for everyone else to leave - but it seemed as if Linn would wait for Tuomas as well.  
"So ... Cinema today?", she asked and Tarja held her breath, in case she'd miss something.  
"I don't know", Tuomas replied. "Who will join?"  
"I don't know about Val", Linn answered. "I think she's going to meet Jack. But I could ask Amy if she wants to join ... Otherwise we'll be alone, would that be bad?"  
Tarja's heart clenched as Linn asked that. 'Please don't go out with her', she prayed. 'She's taking him from me ... Say no, Tuomas ... Say no!'  
"Linn, I ..."  
"You don't have to", Tarja could hear Linn say. She sounded very sad.  
Tuomas sighed. "I wanted to say that I'm not sure if I have time. You know that I have a long way home."  
"Okay, so ... then tell me when you know", Linn said. "I really didn't want to annoy you."  
'But you did', Tarja thought, staring at one single word inside the book.  
Maailmani.  
Maailmani.  
Maailmani ...  
Yes, Tuomas was her world ...  
"Goodbye, Miss Turunen."  
"Hm? Oh, goodbye, Linn", Tarja answered quickly as she looked up and watched Linn leave the classroom.  
And suddenly they were alone.  
For a minute no one said a word, then Tarja shut her book. "So", she started. "My beauty cascaded on you?"  
Tuomas gulped. "Well", he started, his cheeks red.  
"You're cute", Tarja whispered and smiled at him. "And you're smart. Too smart for her."  
"Linn?", Tuomas asked surprised. 'Cute?!'  
Tarja nodded and Tuomas laughed gently.  
"I don't want something from her", he said lowly, locking his blue eyes with her green ones.  
"You don't?", Tarja whispered and Tuomas stepped closer.  
"I really don't. She's ... too young", he whispered, hoping she'd get the hint.  
She blushed, so she obviously did. "Too young?", she whispered.  
Tuomas nodded. "I want ... a woman."  
'That's it', Tarja thought, her heart racing madly. 'He wants me. He means me. He feels something for me.' "Anyone specific?", she asked quietly, hoping he would kiss her now. 'And if he doesn't, I will', Tarja told herself, but suddenly Tuomas stepped back.  
"I have to go", he said. "See you, Miss Turunen."  
"Bye", Tarja whispered and couldn't help but check out his backside as he turned around and walked out of the classroom.  
Tarja's mind was turning. 'Did this just really happen? He told me he wants a ... WOMAN?! Could he actually mean me??'  
Her hands were trembling as she looked at the lines he wrote for another time.  
Every felt away with me, just once that all I need. Entwined in finding you one day ...  
My love, it lies so deep ...  
I'd take you away, castaway on a lonely day.  
So lost in your sea.  
Your beauty cascaded on me ...  
"I have to find out", Tarja mumbled and pulled out an empty sheet of paper.  
Princess of lust, she wrote, a line she had out of the book. Dignity put to dust. A virginal sight ('Cause he's a virgin', Tarja thought), their apple to bite.  
Drink from my thighs - she bit her lower lip as she wrote the last lines - the rain of lies. A sight so cursed, breasts which never nursed ...  
"Can I give that to him?", Tarja mumbled to herself. "Oh well, I can just say I want to improve my writing. I'll do that ..."

I want a woman ...  
Tuomas hit his palm on his forehead for the tenth time. 'How could I say that?? Am I stupid??'  
"Are you okay?", a sudden voice asked and Tuomas looked up, staring right into Amy's face.  
"No", he said and hit his forehead once again. "I embarrassed myself so much in front of Miss Turunen ..."  
"What did you do?", Amy asked and sat down next to him, Tuomas quickly telling her a part of the story, the part where he had told her that he wanted a woman.  
"Okay, that's really embarrassing", Amy chuckled. "But what will happen? She won't call the police to lock you away or so."  
"Yes, but - don't you get it, Amy?? She'll think I mean her!" 'Even though I do ...'  
"Oh, okay", Amy said. "Hmm ... And now?"  
"I don't know", Tuomas sighed. "I guess I'll go out with you and Linn tonight."  
Amy grimaced. "Tuo - don't understand me wrong now, but ... I think that Linn wants to go out with you alone. Well, she didn't ask me for anything. And to be honest, I wouldn't have gone with you two anyway after you ... after you kissed her."  
"Linn wants some alone time with me?", Tuomas mumbled and Amy nodded.   
"Then I guess I will go out with her", Tuomas sighed and Amy nodded.  
"You won't regret it", she said with a little wink.  
'I doubt that', Tuomas thought. 'Linn is wonderful ... But she's just no Tarja.'


	12. Chapter 12

Tuomas missed her madly at Tuesday. He prayed to God that she would come over to visit the library or pick up something she needed to work, but nothing. Tuomas placed himself on the bench he always sat with Linn, Val and Amy, staring at the cars, but Tarja's black Ford didn't appear.  
"How was your date, by the way?", Valerie suddenly asked and Linn sighed.  
"It was no date ...", she mumbled and Tuomas could hear the sadness in her voice.  
He didn't react on it, though. True, it hadn't been a date. Linn had tried to hold his hand once, but he had pulled away. She had paid her own ticket and as they parted, they had hugged shortly.  
"Tuomas", Valerie said reproachfully and Tuomas looked at her.  
"What?", he said and suddenly noticed that Linn and Amy were gone.  
"She's heartbroken", Valerie explained. "Don't you get that she ... likes you?"  
Tuomas lifted up his shoulders. "Would it be bad if I said she's too young for me?"  
"That is no obstacle", Valerie said coldly. "She is seventeen, you're twenty-one, what's bad with that? I'm also twenty and she's my best friend! That is no reason to be so mean to her."  
"I wasn't mean to her", Tuomas said and glared at the young woman, who glared back wordlessly.  
"Are you gay?", Valerie suddenly asked. "Just tell her, if you are. She will understand."  
"Why do you think that?", Tuomas asked with a dry laugh.  
"Because you slept next to her and nothing happened."  
"Because we were both drunk", Tuomas said and stood up. "I don't want to talk to you about this", he said, stuffed his hands into the pockets of his jeans and walked away.  
A few metres away, Linn and Amy sat on the grass. The brunette girl was hugging the crying blonde.  
"Why doesn't he just tell me that he's not interested?", she cried and Tuomas' heart clenched.  
"Love is mean, sweetheart", Amy whispered.  
'Indeed', Tuomas thought sadly and passed the girls.  
"But he could just tell me", Linn mumbled and Tuomas felt a sting in his heart. He knew she wouldn't feel better if he told her.  
'She's a nice girl. I guess she deserves to know. Tarja though ... I just can't tell her. Nothing would be more embarrassing as her reaction to a love declaration from me, while she just loves to flirt ... That winking yesterday, it can't mean anything. She's my teacher and she's beautiful. She knows she's beautiful, that's why she flirts. And I'm her victim, only because I'm older than the others ...'  
Tuomas went straightly to the library, thinking about what he could read next. He wanted to give back A midsummer night's dream and get something else, Emily Dickinson, for example ...

Tarja was having a bad day. Her mind just wouldn't stop thinking about Tuomas, the way he had blushed, the way he had winked at her, the way he suddenly had lowered his head ... Tarja wondered if he had thought of something specific while she had winked at him ... She had blushed as well as he had, but she had thought of his soft lips gently on hers, while his skilled hands caressed the sides of her (naked) body ...  
"You need help", Tarja mumbled and shivered a little. She closed her eyes and leaned back, deciding to turn that stupid day into something special.  
"What are you doing?", he says and comes closer.  
"Well, what does it look like?", I say coldly, but I'm smiling at him. His blue eyes sparkle as he smiles back.  
"Correcting essays?", he says with that growling voice of him that directly goes to my core. He slowly comes closer.  
"That's it", I answer, teasing him through leaning back.  
"Well ...", he whispers. "Can't you imagine doing something more ... exciting?"  
"Right now?", I smile at him with a teasing smile. "Mh ... No, not really."  
But he ends that conversation abruptly as he presses his lips on mine and I give in. What else should I do? I stand up and crash our bodies closer, my lips part and our tongues touch.  
My hands wander beneath his shirt and a little upwards, until I touch his chest. I can feel his heart beating madly. Our lips and tongues caress each others and suddenly his hand is somewhere between my thighs. He carefully grazes the skin beneath my skirt and I moan into his mouth.  
"Do it", I whisper and he lets his hand wander upwards until he touches my damp panty. I moan once again and kiss him harder, while he applies a little pressure against my clit. Soon he is massaging my private parts and I'm parting my legs for him, eager to make him take me against the desk, right inside my classroom, where everyone could just come in and catch us.  
"Tuomas -!"  
With a gasp Tarja ripped her eyes open and pulled her hand out of her panties.  
"I really need help", she sighed and fell back on her bed.  
'How can I even think of him like that? Again?? He's a student for heaven's sake ...  
Sure, he's beautiful and handsome ... His eyes sparkle and his lips are so wonderful ...'  
Tarja blushed deeply and buried her face in the pillow.  
"Princess of lust, dignity put to dust ...", she mumbled.

"I'm at home", Tuomas grunted and threw his bag in the corner.  
"Hi", Susanna answered and came up to him. "Are you in a bad mood? Didn't you sleep much?"  
She wiggled her eyebrows.  
"I didn't sleep at her place, Susanna", Tuomas sighed and Susanna squealed.  
"But you met her!", she said and grabbed Tuomas' arm. "Tell me about her!"  
Tuomas sighed. "What do you want to know?"  
"Name!", Susanna said. "Haircolour! Eye colour! When you kissed for the first time -"  
"I won't tell her name", Tuomas said. "But her hair colour is black ... And her eyes are green ..." He got a dreamy smile in his face.  
"Awwww!", Susanna said gently. "You're so in love. When did you kiss for the first time?"  
"We didn't kiss yet, Su", Tuomas said. "We only -"  
"Touch?"  
"Su!", Tuomas called. "No ... I - I didn't go to cinema with her ..."  
"Wo - ho!", Susanna laughed. "You are a player, Tuo!"  
"Linn loves me but ... I love T - her."  
"T", Susanna said. "So her name starts with a T. T and T - that's so cute."  
Tuomas blushed. True ... Tuomas and Tarja. Tarja and Tuomas ...  
"Does she love you back?", Susanna asked.  
"I hope so", Tuomas whispered and Susanna looked at him with a bad conscience.  
She hadn't known that they hadn't even kissed ... She had thought that they were already together.  
"And who will you take to my wedding? Linn or T?"  
"T, I hope", Tuomas sighed. "Yesterday she flirted with me, I hope that meant something ..."  
"I'm sure it does", Susanna said and nudged her brothers arm. "You're very handsome and you're nice. A girl can't wish for more."  
'But she's a woman', Tuomas thought again. 'A beautiful, intelligent, sexy, talented, woman ...'  
Suddenly he remembered something. Tarja was thirty - she was only two years older than Susanna!  
"Su?", he asked a little shy. "If you ... If you weren't my sister, would you want to date me?"  
"If I wasn't related with you in any way, I'd be all over you!", Susanna said and Tuomas' heart jumped. Maybe Tarja felt the same ... "Don't underestimate yourself, Tuomas." Susanna smiled at him gently. "You're intelligent, you're romantic, you're really good looking ... What makes you so insecure?"  
"Her perfectness", Tuomas sighed. "She can have everyone ... I doubt she'd take me of all people."  
"Aw", Susanna said and patted her brother's shoulder. 'So that T-woman is one of those who rule ... Oy, I hope he didn't fall in love with the wrong person.'

On Wednesday Tarja was wearing her hair back. She peeled off her leather jacket and Tuomas had to swallow as she freed her marvelous skin from her jacket. His breath was caught in his lungs, now even more than before, now that he sat so close to her.  
She collected the homework from everyone, but she didn't even look at Tuomas, as she took his work from him. She just passed his desk and Tuomas closed his eyes, smelling the lingering scent of her gentle perfume ... Vanilla, once again.  
As she walked back, he could only stare at her backside. Her black shirt had a V-cut out until the midst of her back, showing her fragile back. She was so thin, the line of her spine was visible on her skin. Tuomas let his gaze trail lower and finally it hung itself on her rear.  
She wore simple blue jeans, but her ass was really something you could look at for hours.  
"A few of you", she suddenly started and turned around, leaning herself against the desk. Tuomas quickly looked up - and met her green eyes ...  
"A few of you", she started again, ripping her eyes away from his, "already know about the music festival of our school in April. All of you are in their first semester, so all of you never have been at one. Or has anyone already been at one with their family?"  
Everyone shook their heads.  
"It works like this", Tarja sighed. "Every 'band' will show their songs to the guests. There will be something to eat and something to drink, I will say a few words, the principal will say a few words ... And I'll pick a few 'talents' out of you, those one will perform something on their own, without their band. And then we'll do something together as well, like a choir. Any questions?"  
"Why?", Tuomas asked and Tarja looked at him.  
"Why what?", she asked, an invisible smile on her lips.  
"For whom do we do that? Is it for us, is it for our families ...?"  
Everyone was quiet, it was so quiet you could easily hear a pin fall, if someone would drop one. Everyone was just stunned of what he was able to ask her. No one else dared to talk with her like that. Everyone was waiting for the thunderstorm ...  
"It's for you, because you get to see how it is to perform in front of the public", Tarja replied calmly and everyone still held their breaths. "Then it's for your families, so they will be able to see what their children can do ... Or what they can't do." Tarja smiled a little evilly. "And it's of course for the school, because if that festival is successful, and it always is, we will get more interested students and a good image, et cetera ..."  
"But if I wanted to study only Music, I'd go to the Sibelius, so why doing all of that?", Tuomas pointed out and now Tarja almost glared at him.  
"Because the Sibelius is for Music alone and we have Music, Literature, Arts and languages as English, Finnish, German and Spanish combined", she said through gritted teeth. "The Sibelius is for Musicians, our college is for Artists in general."  
"Hoo, sorry", Tuomas said as he noticed how pissed off she was. Her mouth was a thin line as she looked at him, not mad, but still. "Then I'm of course looking forward to it", he added a little sarcastically.  
Music festival.  
A music festival meant for him three to four days party with live bands on a camping place with loads of alcohol, headbanging and, in his alcoholic intoxication, kissing three different girls at one single day.  
Her music festival would obviously be more like a church choir.  
He thought about his band and thought about the possibility to add a little more metal or rock style into it ... Maybe he would find a way to replace the acoustic guitar with an e-guitar?  
"We will start practicing for the choir at Friday, okay?", Tarja went on and clapped her hands, bringing Tuomas back. Her eyes rested on him and he smiled at her.  
She didn't smile back, but her eyes were still resting on him.  
Okay, he formed with his lips and finally the corners of her mouth turned into the hint of a smile.  
Tarja was having troubles. He really was someone, who had to courage to say what he thought, even if it was against her.  
And that was something she admired ... And then he was smiling at her, whispering the word 'okay' to her ...  
Tarja had a hard time in calming her heartbeat down, but there was no doubt anymore.  
She was in love with him.  
And she knew she better wasn't.


	13. Chapter 13

December started with a heap of snow falling over Finland. Tuomas fought his way from the bus stop to the university through a metre snow that had fallen over night. He cursed as he almost got hit by a car, which came to stand only half a metre in front of him. His eyes widened though, as he noticed the black Ford.  
And his heart jumped as the door opened and no one else than Tarja put her head out. "Jump inside!", she called and Tuomas didn't hesitate. He opened the door of the passenger's seat and let himself fall down on the empty seat.  
"Thank you", he breathed and Tarja smiled.  
"No need", she said softly and started the car again. "You're not the only one who is late today. This looks if there is a huge, fucking blizzard coming. Driving the car is dangerous today."  
"But inside a car it's cozier than outside", Tuomas noted and Tarja nodded. His heart stood still for a moment as he heard and recognised the quiet tunes of her radio.  
"Is that Sonata Arctica?", he asked happily and Tarja nodded again, her eyes squinted.  
Tuomas dared to reach to the button and switched the volume a little up. She had a nice car, it seemed pretty new. The seats were leather and very comfortable. As he looked around, his eyes fell on a pair of glasses on the backseat. They didn't look as if they belonged to a man, they rather looked as if they belonged to Tarja herself. Had she thrown them backwards as she had seen him?  
Tuomas couldn't suppress a smile. "You've lost your glasses", he pointed out and Tarja groaned.  
"I've lost my contact lenses but there is no chance in this world that someone will see me with glasses."  
Tuomas shook his head. She was so superficial. "Tarja, you can't see anything", he said and quickly added, "Miss Turunen."  
"It's okay, you can call me Tarja", Tarja said and stopped the car. "I don't really care about formalities and you've already called me Tarja a few times, so ..." Tuomas said nothing as she reached back and grabbed her glasses. Then she threw a glare at him. "Don't look at me."  
'Will be hard', Tuomas thought and closed his eyes. After a few seconds Tarja had started the car again and Tuomas dared to look at her.  
The breath got caught in his lungs as he spotted the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.  
"Gorgeous", he breathed and Tarja groaned.  
"No. Now look away."  
Tuomas chuckled and looked out of the window.  
A minute later they came to stand at Tarja's parking place, and Tuomas turned his head to the elder woman. "Thanks for driving me", he said with a dry mouth. She was still wearing her glasses (she just looked breathtaking) and smiled at him broadly.  
"No need", she said as she had done before. "Please go first, I don't want anyone to see us getting out of the same car."  
"Oh", Tuomas said dumbly. "Sure. Alright. Sorry, Tarja."  
Tarja smiled at him and winked. "I like it when you say my name."  
'What a flirt', Tuomas thought, but the truth was, he liked it.  
He quickly got out of the car, his heart fluttering. He had never seen something beautiful as her smile ... She smiled so heartily and lovingly, and Tuomas couldn't stop thinking of the fact that the smile and the wink had been only for him. He ran to the university, glad that it was Friday and he would have four hours ME in a row now.

Tarja was wearing a black and white trouser suit and her hair was open and flat. Tuomas had first swallowed hard as she had taken off her coat. The suit itself wasn't tight but it brought out her figure anyway, since the blazer was short, so short that her ass was wonderfully visible, getting formed by the white fabric of her trousers.  
Beneath this blazer she wore her black turtle neck pullover again, the one that had brought out her breasts so much.  
As Tarja sat down on the teacher's desk, really on the desk, a quick fantasy crossed his mind, a fantasy where he was stepping up to her, claiming her lips and pushing himself between her thighs ... On the teacher's desk.  
He shook his head and forced himself to look away and back at his band. He had started liking his band, to be honest, Sandra was a really good singer (probably the third best after Tarja and Cornelia) and Jule was simply amazing on the piano. Janne had agreed to change the acoustic guitar to an electric one and Noah had turned out to be an incredible drummer.  
"Are you happy with the song?", Tuomas asked and looked at the copy, the original one was in Tarja's bag. His band nodded and Tuomas threw a look at Tarja.  
Everyone was thinking the same.  
No one was brave enough to ask her what she was thinking of the song, so after a soft sigh Tuomas pulled himself together and walked up to her.  
Tarja's green eyes widened as he stepped closer and then she smiled.  
"Tuomas. Can I help you?"  
"I wanted to ask you if you've taken a look at our song", Tuomas asked straightly and Tarja jumped off the desk.  
Now she was standing next to Tuomas, which made him look down to her.  
She only reached until his chin and that made his heart even flutter more.  
What he didn't know, Tarja's heart fluttered crazily as well.l as she looked up the him. He had no idea how hard it was for her right now not to pull him down and let their lips melt together in a searing kiss.  
Tarja quickly rounded the desk and sat down, pulling out her folder and opened it.  
"Right", she said, her heart beating so madly, she could feel it in her throat. She turned the folder. "I thought about this one ...", she whispered and Tuomas' gaze fell on a foreign piece of paper.  
Passion And The Opera.  
"Is that -?", he started, but Tarja shushed him, looking around.  
"I wrote it, yeah", Tarja breathed.  
"May I have it and have a look at it at home?", Tuomas said lowly and Tarja nodded, giving him back the song of the band, hiding her own song in it.  
Without another word he went back to his seat.  
He let Tarja's song fall into his lap before he opened the sheet of paper that showed his and his band's song.  
"Alright, let's see what the witch liked and what she didn't like", he said a little sarcastically, while Passion And The Opera seemed to pulsate between his thighs.

The hours went by fast, too fast for Tuomas' liking, and he also didn't see much of Tarja.  
As Amy invited him to go out again, he immediately said no. Not after the last time three weeks ago.  
"But Linn and I are so alone since Valerie and Jack are a couple", Amy sighed and Tuomas shrugged. He couldn't tell her that he would only come because of Tarja, or could he? And that he knew for sure that Tarja wouldn't be going out tonight? No, he couldn't tell her, Amy would ask him where he knew that from, and he couldn't answer "From herself".  
"Sorry, Amy, but my nephew is visiting us and he already asked for me to play with him", Tuomas lied and Amy sighed.  
"Alright, no problem. Have fun."  
"Thank you", Tuomas answered and smiled at Amy, who didn't smile back. He could tell that she was still pissed at the fact that he had "broken Linn's heart".  
The poor girl didn't seem as if her heart was broken, though, she only ignored him, but that was all.  
Valerie ignored him as well, but he didn't care. Her boyfriend was around every free minute, so she wouldn't be alone anyway.  
"Have you talked to Linn yet?", Amy suddenly asked and Tuomas sighed.  
"Amy, she ignores me."  
"Still you have to tell her a reason why you're not interested", Amy said. "She's very sensitive. She will need a reason why, because if you just dump her without a reason, she'll be -"  
"Okay, okay", Tuomas interrupted her. "Is it okay if I tell her next Monday? I really have to catch my train."  
"Call her", Amy said and opened her bag, pulling out a little booklet. "I'll give you her number."

An hour later Tuomas was sitting in the train back to Kitee. He had stuffed the little paper with Linn's number into his bag (between his ME and English books) and now pulled out the other piece of paper, the one Tarja had written.  
Written for him ...  
Tuomas unfolded the sheet with a beating heart, revealing a whole song only written for him.  
Princess of lust, dignity put to dust -  
Tuomas had to stop at the first line already. 'P - princess of lust? Does she mean herself?'  
A virginal sight,  
'Okay, she means me with that.'  
Their apple to bite. Drink from my thighs the rain of lies -  
Tuomas' heart almost stopped. What an erotic poem ... Did she mean him with that, drink from my thighs??  
A sight so cursed, breasts which never nursed ...  
Her breasts had never nursed.  
Tuomas pressed the sheet on his chest, his heart beating madly. This woman ...  
The whole week she had been secretly flirting with him and now she was giving him an erotic text like this? Wow ...  
He couldn't believe his luck. He knew her for three weeks now and it seemed as if she'd completely trusted him.

First thing he did when he came home, was calling Linn.  
"Barnelinen?", he heard her voice and thanked god that it wasn't Valerie.  
"Don't hang up, I need to talk to you", Tuomas said and Linn sighed.  
"Tuomas."  
"I have to explain to you why I'm not interested in you."  
Linn sighed again. "Okay. Start."  
Tuomas looked at his fingernails. "Linn ... There is a woman I love."  
"Oh", Linn whispered.  
"Yes ... I'm not sure if she loves me back, but I think so ..."  
"Is she from Kitee?", Linn asked. "A girl of your old school?"  
"Woman", Tuomas corrected. "And yes she is ..." Well, Tarja was from Kitee.  
"Oh sorry", Linn said bitterly. "At least I now know. Well, then good luck with this woman. She's really lucky, I hope she appreciates that."  
And without waiting for an answer, Linn had ended the call.  
Tuomas left the living room, glad that no one of his family had been there to listen at this conversation.  
Then he went upstairs and tried to think of something to do for the whole weekend.

Tarja couldn't concentrate a single minute. Whenever she played something on the piano, a sudden wave of longing for Tuomas standing behind her to guide her hands washed over her and she had to stop. Oh, how she wished for his hands to be on hers while she played, for his lips to be on hers after she stopped ...  
"Damn!", she screamed and threw her glasses on the floor. She hid her face in her hands and crashed her head down on the big piano, whiche made a horrible sound as she pressed more keys at once with her forehead. "Get - out - of - my - head!", she whimpered, crashing her head down with every word, one sound after the other sounding along every word.  
Then she slowly stood up and walked over to her telephone, eager to find his number in the telephone book and eager to call him.

"Nortia-Holopainen?"  
Tarja ripped her eyes open. She had forgotten who his mother was ... "Ehm - hi", she stuttered. "Eh, is Tuomas here?"  
Tarja could almost hear the grin in the woman's voice as she answered.  
"One moment. Can I have a name?"  
"Mh - Soile", Tarja said a little hesitating, in case that Tuomas had told something about her.  
"Just one minute", Kirsti answered and Tarja closed her eyes.  
Should she hang up?  
But then his confused voice appeared and Tarja had to held her breath. His voice was so amazing ... So deep ... Full of emotion ...  
"Hello? Soile ...?"  
"It's me, Tuomas. Tarja", Tarja whispered.  
Tuomas' heart almost stopped. She had called him!  
"Hi", he smiled, not noticing how his mother shook her head a few metres away from him. "Why are you calling?"  
"I wanted to ask you if you've already read my text", Tarja mumbled a little embarrassed.  
Tuomas' heart was beating madly. "I did. It was very good ... You are a wonderful writer."  
"And the sense?", Tarja asked nervously. If he had figured out that it was about him?  
"It's very interesting, you know? But can we talk at Monday?"  
"Oh, sure", Tarja said with pink cheeks. "Of course. Sorry for disturbing."  
"You never disturb, Soile", Tuomas said with a light smile and Tarja leaned back.  
"See you, Tuomas."  
"Bye. Have a nice weekend", Tuomas said gently and Tarja smiled.  
"Thank you. Same to you."  
Thomas hung up, smiling to himself. she had called him ...  
"Ehm ... Tuo?" His mother's voice was suddenly behind him and Tuomas turned around.   
"Yes?"  
"Soile? Tuomas, I'm confused. Who is she?"  
"Someone of my ME class", Tuomas said and wanted to went past his mother, but Kirsti grabbed his arm.  
"And what about Linn?", she asked.  
"Linn is just a friend", Tuomas said annoyed.  
"Mhm. And T?"  
Tuomas groaned. Since he had told Susanna about "T", no one ever started to talk about her. Every time he heard things like,  
"Is her name Tiia? Tamara? Tanja? Tove? Tarja? Thea? Talvi? Teodora?"  
Every day they came with a new name starting with a T.  
"T", Tuomas said and shook his mother off. "T is my true love." And then he sprinted upstairs, still trying to calm down his beating heart.  
She had called him ...


	14. Chapter 14

Monday arrived and Tuomas shivered madly as he walked inside the college. On his way to the ME room he spotted her immediately, she was leaning against her door, talking to a teacher.  
To a male teacher.  
Tuomas froze immediately as he recognised him, it was the arts teacher. What was his name again?  
Ah, Jokinen.   
Tuomas didn't know what to do, while student after student passed the talking and smiling professors, Tuomas just couldn't bring himself to pass them.  
He couldn't.  
Tarja was so beautiful ... And she was laughing about something the male teacher had said ...  
They were flirting, no doubt.  
Tuomas swallowed and waited until Mr Jokinen would leave, but it seemed he wouldn't leave so soon. Tarja smiled and then laughed as he said something to her, while Tuomas could feel the blood rush into his face.  
He was so jealous!  
But then something happened, something which Tuomas would have never thought.  
Tarja turned her head and looked at Tuomas, their eyes met and Tarja's cheeks went pink.  
She immediately turned her head back to Mr Jokinen and continued smiling and nodding, her eyes darting between the professor and Tuomas.  
Tuomas swallowed again, collected all his courage (hell, she had blushed as she had seen him!) and walked to the door. As he went closer and noticed that Tarja was clenching her bag against her chest, her hands slightly shivering. She hadn't done that before she had seen him ...  
"Good morning, Miss Turunen, Mr Jokinen", Tuomas greeted politely and Tarja nodded.  
"Good morning, Mr Holopainen", she said, avoiding his look, while Mr Jokinen smiled at him broadly.  
"Hey, Tuomas! See you tomorrow in arts, right?"  
"Right", Tuomas chuckled. "Looking forward."  
He liked the arts teacher, he had, now he was only afraid that he would try to take Tarja from him. Well, the little things he already had, like ... Her flirting with him?  
Tuomas didn't know but as he nodded at the teachers, he wished he could slap the handsome male.  
He was so jealous.  
He went inside and sat down, slowly pulling Slow Love Slow out of his bag. It was his favourite book by Raava Holopainen, and since Tarja had finished Summer Of Elves last week, he had sworn to himself to bring her the next book. And this one was even better, concerning the eroticism (and besides that, the continuation of Passion And The Opera was inside the book).  
"What is this?"  
Tuomas looked into the direction where the voice had come and spotted Linn. She sat where she was always sitting, only a little further away from him.  
"Just a book I'm currently reading", Tuomas said with a light smile. He was happy that Linn talked to him normally again.  
"Oh", Linn said and then she continued with what she originally had wanted to say. "Does your woman know you love her?"  
Tuomas weighed his head. "She doesn't know ... But I think she is suspecting something. She is not stupid and she always looks at me as if she knew ..."  
Linn smiled. "Your eyes glow when you talk about her. I hope she knows how lucky she is."  
Tuomas smiled as the lucky woman herself stepped into the classroom.  
Well, he didn't know if she knew. He only knew that the smiles she sent to the class were only directed to him ...

"Have you noticed?", Linn whispered afer a while. Tarja had turned around and started to write a few notes on the blackboard.  
"Noticed what?", Tuomas mumbled, eager to write down what Tarja was writing down as well.  
"Miss Turunen!", Linn whispered. "She's in a good mood!"  
Tuomas shrugged. "Maybe she got laid", he said quietly, knowing that this wasn't the reason.  
"You think?", Linn mumbled. "Yeah ... I also think her and Jokinen are a couple again."  
Tuomas' pen fell on the desk and he stared at Linn.  
"What!? I - I mean, what do you mean with 'again'?", he asked with ripped open eyes.  
"Last year they were together", Linn informed him quietly. "Val and Amy told us that they always left the classroom together after a quick fuck." Linn giggled and Tuomas forced himself to chuckle, even though he felt like crying.  
"They never made it official, said Amy", Linn told him. "But it was obvious, she said they always held hands when they thought they were alone. Oh, it would be so cool if they started dating again! They're so cute!"  
Tuomas didn't answer, or otherwise he would have told Linn that he didn't find them cute, not at all.  
Suddenly he hated the nice, cool, handsome and young professor, hated him from the depths of his heart.

As the lesson was over, Tuomas almost waited for Mr Jokinen to come in and wait until everyone was gone so he could have a quickie with his Tarja.  
But Mr Jokinen didn't come in, so Tuomas walked up to the beautiful professor's desk as soon as everyone was gone.  
Tarja looked up to him with her beautiful, green eyes and smiled. "Here to discuss my song?", she asked.  
"Indeed, Soile", Tuomas answered with a slight grin and Tarja blushed.  
"Soile is my second name", she explained. "I used it because I didn't want your mother to, ehm ..."  
"Think I did something wrong, because a teacher called me?", Tuomas offered to help her and Tarja nodded.  
"Smart", Tuomas breathed quietly and then he pulled out Slow Love Slow.  
"Oh", Tarja said with a surprise. "For me?"  
Tuomas nodded. "Her best book in my opinion", he said quietly. She was so, so beautiful ... Her eyes shone as she smiled at him.  
"Wow - I'll give it back to you as soon as I'm done", Tarja said, but Tuomas shook his head.  
"If you liked it, it's yours", he mumbled and Tarja stared at him.  
"What?"  
"It's yours", Tuomas repeated a little louder. "I have another one at home."  
Now Tarja looked at the book a little closer and gasped.  
It was totally new, it hadn't gotten opened once.  
"Tuomas - that's so nice, but I can't -"  
"And I won't take no for an answer", he interrupted her. "I wanted to tell you that you're a wonderful teacher and that you deserve a little attention. I don't want to bribe you, Tarja, I want to see my favourite teacher smile."  
And Tarja did smile at him.  
And laid her hand over his, the one which was on her desk. "Thank you", she whispered. "And I didn't see it as a bribe."  
Tuomas' heart was racing. She was touching his hand again!!  
But not for a long time, slowly Tarja pulled her hand away after some time.  
"So", she said and broke their eye contact, much to Tuomas' despair. "My song?"  
"Right", Tuomas said and collected himself. "I continued, if that's okay."  
"Sure!", Tarja called. "I'm honoured! So you liked it ...?"  
"I liked it a lot", Tuomas said with a nod. "It reminds me a lot of Raava Holopainen. The way you described this theme in a way you don't immediately sense what it's about ... Drink from my thighs the rain of lies ... It's genius, Miss Turunen." Tarja was smiling so proudly, that Tuomas decided to ask her what was bothering him. "Did you think of someone specific while you wrote it?"  
Tarja's smile slowly faded away, of course she had thought of Tuomas. But could she simply tell him? "No", she then said. "Why ...?"  
"Just because", Tuomas mumbled and avoided her look. "Because I've seen you with Mr Jokinen and thought you were ... flirting."  
"Oh", Tarja said and her heart jumped of joy as she saw how jealous he was. "Oh. That is long over, Tuomas. He is ... You know, Oliver is too old for my liking."  
Tuomas didn't reply. Too old??  
His heart beat fast as he swore himself to find out how old the male teacher was, if he was 'too old' for her.  
"The song is in the book", he then mumbled, his cheeks growing deep red.  
'It's long over ...  
Long over ...  
He's too old for her liking ...'  
"Okay", Tarja said. "See you at Wednesday?"  
"Of course", Tuomas said with a happy smile and Tarja winked at him.  
"Until then, my poetry teacher", she said.

Tuomas almost flew out of the classroom. He was so happy, he didn't even care about Mr Jokinen, who was waiting in front of the door.  
"Is Miss Turunen still inside?", he asked and Tuomas nodded with a smile, until he ran to his locker.  
Oliver Jokinen shook his head (what a strange boy) and knocked.  
"Tari?"  
"For the last time, Oliver, you're not in the position to call me that."  
Her words were sharp but she smiled.  
Oliver was so in love with her, never had he seen such a beautiful and perfect creature.  
But he only saw her outer beauty.  
"Forgive me, I forgot you like being on top", the man replied suggestively and Tarja pressed her lips together.  
"What do you want?", she asked in an unfriendly tone and Oliver smiled at her.  
"You know what I want, Tarja ... I want the same as always."  
Tarja sighed and shoved herself a little away from her desk.  
"Alright, start already. But I have to tell you, I'm not in the mood."  
But Oliver didn't care, he had never cared if Tarja was in the mood or not. He took her quickly as always, and as he was done he left the room satisfied, leaving Tarja alone in a frustrated and unsatisfied mood.  
And that was why Tarja would never ever get back to him. Not because he was too 'old' for her, he was 27 (and she had only said that to Tuomas to make him realise that she wanted him), but he had always just fucked her, he had never pleased her, he had never made love to her. He had just used her for sex.  
Tarja had never come in this relationship, not once.  
If Tuomas would make love to her, he would really make love. It would last an hour and he would touch every inch of her body, he'd lick her deepest, he'd ...  
"He'd drink from my thighs", Tarja whispered with a smile and leaned back, ignoring her sore genitals. Oliver had always been fast and brutal ...  
Tarja immediately imagined a scene where Tuomas was the one to take her, and as she opened her eyes again after an imagined orgasm caused by the student, she opened the book that her favourite student had bought for her.

"Amy! Amy!", Tuomas shouted happily as he spotted the brunette not far away from Valerie and Jack.  
"Tuo, hi", Amy said. "Did you call Linn?"  
"Of course I did, between us everything's alright again", Tuomas answered and then looked to the hand holding couple. "I'm Tuomas", he said and nodded at the elder man. Elder was good, he was probably two years older than Tuomas.  
"Jack", the man answered and they shook hands.  
"Can I have a word with you?", Tuomas then asked and looked at Amy again. "Just a minute."  
Amy sighed but then nodded. "Sure. Is it about your lady?"  
Tuomas took Amy's elbow and pulled her away from the couple.  
"No, it's about Mr Jokinen", Tuomas answered and bit his lip as Amy threw a doubting look at him.  
"What about him?"  
"Linn told me he's together with Miss Turunen!", Tuomas lied, acting happy.  
"What?!", Amy called. "No, Tuo, he was. She broke up last June."  
"They're together, I swear!", Tuomas said. "They flirted madly and I think they also fucked. Damn, he's so lucky."  
But Amy shook her head. "To be honest, I don't think they're together. Don't you think they only fucked? You know, they continued sleeping with each other, even after their relationship."  
This was new for Tuomas.  
His heart clenched at the imagination of the two teachers having sex ...  
"Are you okay, Tuo?", Amy asked carefully. "You look as if you've got a headache ..."  
"Oh, I do", Tuomas groaned lowly. "Anyway, I was interested in Mr Jokinen's age, you know ... He looks too young to be with Miss Turunen ..."  
Amy snorted. "No one's too young to be with Miss Turunen", she said and then laughed. "No, he's twenty-seven."  
Tuomas didn't answer. 27 ... And he was 'too old' in Tarja's eyes. Did that mean that he had a chance? He was almost 21, was that too young maybe?  
"Tuomas?"  
"I have Maths now", Tuomas said a little down. "See you tomorrow in Arts, okay?"  
"Okay, see you", Amy said with a lifted eyebrow. She looked after the young man, who had his hands stuffed in his pockets and who's head hung down.  
Was he sad because Miss Turunen fucked with Mr Jokinen ...?  
"No, that can't be ...", Amy mumbled.  
He couldn't be interested in the hot but mean teacher.  
Or could he?


	15. Chapter 15

Kirsti found her son on his bed, his face hidden in the pillow.  
"Tuo? Is everything alright?", she asked carefully and sat down on the edge of his bed.  
"No", Tuomas sobbed and Kirsti sighed desperately. She had never seen nor heard her son cry and now ...  
"Do you want to tell me?", she asked and stroke the young man's back. If he cried, something terrible must have happened .  
"It's T", Tuomas groaned into his pillow. "I think she's - she's dating someone ..."  
"Oh", Kirsti said, her hand still trying to calm the shaking man. "Why do you think that?"  
"I've seen her with him", Tuomas whispered and turned around. "It hurts so much, mum ..."  
Kirsti nodded and pulled her son in a hug. "Shhh ...", she said as she weighed him. "I know that love hurts. I wish I could help you ..."  
Pentti was standing in the doorframe, watching the scene a little shocked. He had known that his son was in love, but this? He was crying because of this woman! Was she even good for him?  
Kirsti threw a pleading look at her husband and Pentti stepped to the bed.  
"Oh, Tuo", he sighed and embraced him as well. "I don't think this woman is good for you."  
"Same here", Kirsti sighed. "She hurts you, baby ..."  
"I love her so", Tuomas sobbed back and his parents shared a knowing but painful look.

Tarja sat down on her bed, trying to forget Oliver and how he had taken her. Usually she didn't care, he came about once a week and took her, but now she suddenly cared. She had never cared about his roughness, sometimes she had even almost liked it, but since she knew Tuomas ...  
"This has to stop", Tarja decided and swore to herself not to let Oliver take her again.  
She opened Slow Love Slow and smiled as a familiar piece of paper fell out. With shaking hands she lifted it up.  
Princess of lust , dignity put to dust. A virginal sight, their apple to bite.  
Drink from my thighs the rain of lies. A sight so cursed, breasts which never nursed  
Tarja held her breath as she read on. He had only written four lines but they were amazing.  
An Aphrodite for mortal souls playing hide and seek in lecherous roles. Their erotic hour, my tearless weep, their satisfaction, my infinite sleep.  
Tarja leaned back and closed her eyes. Another daydream washed over her ...  
Tuomas parts my legs and plungs deeper into me. As if  I've known he does it slowly, he caresses my clit, eager to make me cum. I can feel how close he is, but he doesn't let go. He wants me to cum with him.  
"Tarja", he groans. "Please ... I'm close ..."  
"You may let go", I breathe back and cup his face. I press a kiss on his lips and he captures my lips with his. Tongue meets tongue and he moans loudly as he still wants to restrain himself.  
Tarja opened her eyes again and shook her head. "I'm so pathetic", she sighed and hid her face in her hands. 'Honestly now, now I'm thinking of Tuomas taking me slowly, only because Oliver uses me for quickies ... Oh Tari, Tari ...'

Tuomas felt like staying at home the next day, he knew that he couldn't face Mr Jokinen. But he stood up anyway, the chances of meeting Tarja were big, so he forced himself to drive through the snowy winterland. He wasn't in Christmas mood, not at all. He had never liked Christmas but this year it was even worse.  
Tuomas put in Children Of Bodom, he needed a heap of heavy metal now to make the other song vanish out of his head, a song, that described his wish the best.  
All I want for Christmas is you ...  
Tuomas came too late, but it didn't matter. The teacher already knew why he always came too late, so there was no need to say something, anymore.  
Later the urge not to go to Arts grew, but Tuomas forced himself to go. He greeted the teacher harshly and as he sat down next to Amy, the girl looked at him with a strange expression in her face.  
"What?", Tuomas huffed and Amy looked away without an answer.  
The whole lesson Tuomas drew dark creatures, which symbolised Mr Jokinen, but the teacher himself complimented him for his drawings.  
Tuomas couldn't stop staring at the man, he needed to find out what Tarja liked on him. He had no beard and short, dark blonde hair - did she like that?  
His dressing style was normal, jeans and a greyish pullover. Tuomas sadly thought of his experimenting Gothic/Rock/Punk style and shook his head. He was sure that Mr Jokinen would never use eyeliner if he went out. Tuomas did, but only if he went to the 'Kiteen Rockstation', which was something like the Rockhouse in Helsinki.  
"Are you okay? You look pale", Amy asked as the lesson was almost over. "And you're so quiet today."  
"I'm feeling sick", Tuomas replied. "I think I've eaten something bad."  
"Oh", Amy said with a worried look at him. "Do you have to vomit? If yes tell me, I'll ask Mr Jokinen to go out with you."  
But Tuomas shook his head, smiling at Amy. She was a great friend. But could he also trust her with his secret?

Tarja waited in front of the Arts room, her hands shaking madly.  
She'd ask him now.  
She'd give him the text and ask him out.  
As the bell rang, student after student stormed out. Some greeted her, some ignored her, but Tuomas wasn't with them.  
As everyone had gone out, Tarja stepped inside to ask Oliver where Tuomas was (she had thought about a little story in which Tuomas was a problem student, in case if Oliver would ask why she wanted to see him). And with a little shock she noticed that Tuomas was still inside, Tuomas and Amy. They were talking to Oliver, so Tarja froze and waited for them to finish. After a while she noticed how pale Tuomas was and her heart clenched. Was he ill?  
After a few minutes Oliver turned around and grinned at Tarja, who forced herself to smile back.  
Tuomas didn't even look at her.  
"Hey babe", Oliver chuckled and stepped close. He grabbed her butt cheeks and pulled her close, pressing a kiss on her lips.  
"Hey!", Tarja shouted. "Not in front of the students, Oliver!"  
But as she pushed the teacher away and seeked for Tuomas, he was gone. And so was Amy.

Tuomas tumbled out of the restroom and announced Amy that he would drive home. He hadn't even finished the sentence as he noticed that there was someone standing next to Amy.  
"I'll drive you to the railway station", the female teacher offered and Tuomas' heart stood still for a moment.  
He nodded and Tarja put her hand on his back. "You're sweating", she said. "Are you feeling cold?"  
Tuomas nodded again and Tarja sent Amy away to get his jacket from the locker.  
Amy went away and Tarja studied Tuomas' face, touching his forehead. "You have a temperature", she said softly. "Stay at home as long as you need to, okay?"  
Tuomas didn't answer and as Amy came back with his jacket, the women helped him into it.  
Amy also escorted them to Tarja's black Ford and as soon as the brunette was gone, Tarja put on her glasses. Tuomas still found her gorgeous, but he was afraid to say something.  
She had a boyfriend.  
She wasn't interested in him.  
Tarja switched on her radio and Tuomas recognised the fast power metal sound of Sonata Arctica again (Tarja must have been a big fan).  
After half an hour without talking a word they were at the railway station - but Tuomas froze as Tarja drove past it.  
"Tarja?", he asked carefully and looked at the concentrated woman as she made her way to the highway.  
"I'll drive you home", she said through gritted teeth.  
"You don't have to", Tuomas mumbled and Tarja smiled gently.  
"I have to. You're ill. And besides that, I need to pay you back for the book ..."  
The book.  
Tuomas swallowed. "Have you already started reading it?"  
"I wanted to", Tarja said. "But Passion and the opera wouldn't let me."  
Tuomas smiled gently. "You thought of Mr Jokinen as you wrote it, right?", he tried carefully and Tarja snorted.  
"Whatever you saw, Tuomas, there is nothing between us. I wanted to slap him for what he did before. He's such an asshole. Im so glad I broke up with him."  
Tuomas couldn't hold back another smile.  
And as Tarja brought her right hand away from the steering wheel to seek for his, his heart almost stopped.  
She squeezed his hand without looking at him.  
Tuomas' insides went crazy. His stomach made somersaults, his heart beat so madly he could feel it even in his ears, his mind was turning, his skin erupted with goosebumps.  
"I'm not feeling good", he whispered and Tarja squeezed his hand even more.  
"You have fever", she said softly. "Would be strange if you felt good."  
'Maybe I am close to death and hallucinating', Tuomas thought, but the soft, fragile hand on his was real, without a doubt.  
They weren't even on the highway for an hour, and of course Tuomas knew that driving with the car wasn't lasting as long as driving with the train, but sadly he had no car yet. Tarja took the first departure that led to Kitee.  
"I'll show you where I grew up until I was eight, and then you'll tell me where to drive you", Tarja said and Tuomas nodded, his heart fluttering. She hadn't let go of his hand for a single time and now she would even show him where she had grown up! Tuomas couldn't believe what was happening, that was why he was sure he was hallucinating.  
Tarja drove him a little away from Kitee, right into the small village Puhos. "This is where I was born", Tarja said. "I was born at home, same as my brothers."  
"You have brothers?", Tuomas asked and Tarja nodded.  
"Two. Timo was thirteen as we moved to Helsinki and Toni was four."  
Tarja stopped on front of a big, yellow house and sighed. "I always come here to see my old house first when I visit my grandparents", she said and Tuomas stared at the house.  
"This was your house?", he asked quietly and Tarja nodded.  
She turned to him and smiled. "How are you feeling?"  
"I'm fine, to be honest", Tuomas replied and looked down at their holding hands.  
Tarja brought her left hand up to his face and touched his forehead. "You're hot", she noticed and Tuomas looked at her in confusion.  
"Ehm, ehh -", Tarja stuttered and quickly pulled back both her hands. "In the sense of your temperature", she said with red cheeks, but then she giggled. "Oh god. How embarrassing."  
She started the car again and drove him out of Puhos, right into Kitee.  
Tuomas told her where to drive and as they drove past his old school, he looked at Tarja again.  
"Did you also go to that school?"  
"For two years", Tarja said. "I got bullied, that was another reason why we left."  
"Oh", Tuomas said, his heart clenching. She got bullied?! "Why?"  
"Why I got bullied?", Tarja asked and Tuomas nodded. Tarja shrugged. "I don't know and I don't want to know. I can't even remember, but my mother told me once. She said they pushed me around, called me dumb, ugly and fat, they laughed about everything I said, laughed when I sang ..."  
"They were blind and deaf", Tuomas mumbled and Tarja laughed heartily.   
"Tuomas, I already told you once that I didn't always look like I look now."  
"I know, but I'm sure you were a gorgeous child", Tuomas complimented and Tarja couldn't hide another blush. He was such a gentleman ...  
They talked a little about old teachers and Tuomas found out that Tarja had started playing the piano in his mother's class, but she did only for half a year before she had to move.  
"Soon we'll be there", Tuomas informed Tarja after a few minutes and Tarja immediately drove slower, so they had more time to talk.  
Tarja stopped in front of Tuomas' house, but Tuomas didn't get out. They continued talking for ten more minutes, before Tuomas was too weak to go on. He moaned and leaned back, Tarja noticing with worry that he was sweating madly.  
"Shall I help you out?", she asked gently and Tuomas nodded after he had made sure that his parent's cars weren't at home.  
Tarja helped him out of the car and led him to the door, helping him inside.  
"Thank you", Tuomas said gently. "You're good at heart."  
Tarja smiled and pushed a strand of his long hair behind his ear. Tuomas closed his eyes, shivering at her touch. "I needed someone like you in my life", she whispered. "Someone who tells me things I really want to hear."  
With those words she brushed her lips over his gently, but as Tuomas opened his eyes she was gone.

And as he woke up a few hours later, he was sure he had fantasized.


	16. Chapter 16

Tuomas thought of himself close to death during the whole Wednesday. He had 39,5 degrees fever in the morning already and thought he was about to die, until his mother stuffed a tablet into his mouth and forced him to drink water.  
"Paracetamol", she informed him. "Makes the fever sink."  
Tuomas leaned back. "Could you put on some music?", he croaked and Kirsti caressed her son's head.  
"Of course. Any special wish?"  
"Sonata Arctica ...", he mumbled and Kirsti looked at him in surprise.  
"You only have Metallica and Children Of Bodom", she informed him, looking over to the small shelf with CDs and Tuomas groaned.  
"Petri ..."  
"Sure, wait", Kirsti said, who immediately got the hint. Her eldest son had left a few CDs in his room, and to her joy he also left Sonata Arctica.  
Kirsti put the CD into her son's CD player and pressed play.   
Tuomas smiled and closed his eyes.  
"Since when do you like Sonata Arctica?", Kirsti asked, wondering why he smiled as he did.  
"Since I've found out that T likes this band", Tuomas mumbled and hugged his pillow, thinking of it as Tarja.  
"Oh", Kirsti replied quietly and stroke her son's arm. "I thought she's not available?"  
"Dunno", Tuomas whispered. "Maybe she is, maybe she isn't. Doesn't change the fact I love her."  
Kirsti bent down and kissed her son's cheek before she switched off the light and went outside.

Tuomas slept the whole Wednesday and as his mother looked for him in the evening, he slowly sat up.  
"Did I wake you?", Kirsti asked but Tuomas shook his head.  
"The hunger woke me. Hey I think the fever is gone!"  
Kirsti smiled. "The tablets", she informed him and then sat down on his bed again. "Soile called three times."  
Tuomas' breath got caught in his lungs. "She did?"  
Kirsti giggled. "I think she likes you, Tuo."  
'If only', Tuomas thought. "Shall I call her back?"  
"She didn't want to give her number to me. She said she would call again at seven, which would be in five minutes."  
"Okay", Tuomas said and sat up slowly. "I'll wait for her call."  
"Do that. Why don't you date her?"  
'Well, I want to ...', Tuomas thought but he said, "Hm. Because I love T."  
Kirsti sighed. "But Soile seems nice."  
Tuomas rolled his eyes. "Yeah ... she's my second choice", he then spat and Kirsti sighed again.  
This boy.

Tarja called at seven and no minute later.  
"How are you?", she asked gently.  
"I'm fine. The fever has gone down a little", Tuomas answered and Tarja closed her eyes.  
"I missed you today", she whispered. "No one dared to talk against me today."  
Tuomas laughed. "They don't know you as I do."  
"They don't", Tarja said, fiddling with her bathrobe. Oh how she wished to tell him that she was naked ... "Will you - will you be back at Friday?"  
"I don't know, Soile", Tuomas said (he had said her 'name' because his mother had just passed him). "I don't think so."  
"Oh no", Tarja said and bit her lip. "Do you want to meet me this weekend? If you feel better, of course."  
Tuomas almost dropped the phone.  
"If I want to?", he asked a little shocked. "Yes! Of course I want to ..."  
Both Tarja and Tuomas smiled.  
"Okay, if you feel better at Saturday I could pick you up from the railway station", Tarja offered.  
"That'd be great", Tuomas said. "I'll be there at half past three, I'm afraid there is no earlier train."  
"That's okay", Tarja answered. "I wanted to play a little on the piano."  
"Really?", Tuomas asked a little surprised, first thinking she was fooling him.  
"Sure", Tarja answered though. "I wanted to show you the melody I made up for Ever Dream and we can think of one for Passion And The Opera as well. And you can show me a few of your tricks." 'And maybe make out a little', she added in her thoughts, blushing deeply. 'And make love on my piano ... Gosh, Tarja. Come back to the ground again.'  
"Oh, good idea", Tuomas said and smiled. "Then I'll call you if I don't feel better. And if I don't call you, you can be sure I'll come", Tuomas said.  
"Sounds good, but I can't give you my number", Tarja said. "I'm not allowed to."  
"You're not allowed to give me your number?"  
"Law", Tarja simply answered. "But you can look for me in the telephone book. You know my name, I guess."  
"Great, I will", Tuomas said with a grin. "See you then, Soile."  
"I hope you'll recover soon", Tarja answered. "Bye, Tuomas."  
They hung up and immediately Kirsti was next to Tuomas. "You'll meet?", she asked.  
"I'll tell you the truth", Tuomas said, not thinking of speaking the truth for a minute. "She's in my band for the music festival in April and she just wanted to know if I'll come at Friday for practice. She's the singer and I am the songwriter, so I have to teach my songs with her in private."  
Soile ... Sandra ... Tuomas hoped his mother wouldn't want to have a proof.  
"Aha. So it's no date", Kirsti stated and Tuomas shook his head.  
"It's no date", he answered, even though he wished it was. "It's only practising."  
"Alright", Kirsti said. "And only if you're healthy again, you'll meet at Saturday."  
"Exactly", Tuomas said and then he fled from his mother's nosy look.

Tarja missed him even more at Thursday. It was her day off, so she had no idea what to do. She had started correcting tests, then she had played a little on the piano, she had created schedules for her future lessons, then she had gone to her little studio and had sung a little (her studio was nothing more than a room with a microphone, a stereo, a camera and a mirror, only the walls were soundproof, because of the neighbours). She recorded herself and then went to her computer to have a look at it.  
After she was done, she corrected the rest of the tests and then she started reading Slow Love Slow.  
And already the first chapter was so full of passion, that Tarja had to put the book away.   
She was sweating and her genitals were throbbing, it almost hurt, she longed to be touched.  
Without a hesitation she pulled down her panties and parted her legs widely, she touched her clit and gasped as she felt how swollen it was.  
She rolled over and pulled open the drawer of her nightstand, pulling out the black vibrator she loved more than she had loved every single one of her boyfriends.  
She stayed on her stomach, slipped her vibrator into herself and moved her hips against the bed, she got faster as the vibration made her lose her mind, her middle finger was massaging her wet bundle of nerves, which was swelling and pulsating more and more the faster she moved against her bed.  
She thrust the vibrator in and out of herself, wildly and with closed eyes, wondering if she should buy a thicker vibrator and how long Tuomas' cock was.  
She moaned his name without being ashamed as she thrust against the bed, pulling the vibrator in and out of herself.  
"Oh ... Tuomas ... Oh god ... Take me ...", she breathed in a high pitched voice, desperately thinking of the vibrator as the student's penis and thinking of her own hand as the student's hand. "Tuomas ... I'm there ... Don't stop", she moaned and suddenly her limbs got tense. "Oh GOD!", she screeched and her eyes rolled up. "Ohhh - oh good god ..."  
The spasms were taking her over, were taking away her sanity for a moment. She cried out his name, happy that she finally could do it. After that chaste kiss at Tuesday she hadn't forgotten his face as he had closed her eyes, as he had waited for her to kiss her. The way he had parted his lips as Tarja had brushed hers against his.  
She had to restrain herself from kissing him, though, it was still illegal. He was still her student.  
But yet here she was, masturbating and with Tuomas in her mind. She collapsed on her bed and wiped off the sweat between her breasts.  
She slowly pulled out the vibrator and smiled as she looked at the black, wet thing.  
"Tuomas", she said and suddenly the vibrator had a name. "I love you ..."  
And even though she had said it, she wasn't sure whom she had meant, her vibrator or the real Tuomas.  
She walked to the bathroom to take a shower, throwing 'Tuomas' almost carelessly into the sink.

A day later she was almost glad that Tuomas was still ill, otherwise she probably would have blushed madly if she looked at the student. She had continued Passion And The Opera right after she had come out of the shower the day before, her cheeks flushed and her mood lightened because of the previous orgasm (even though she now was depressed that it hadn't been the real, humanly Tuomas who had fucked out her brain).  
She didn't receive a call the whole day, so she figured that their meeting was still a topic.  
In the afternoon she went shopping, deciding to buy new make up. She bought a dark red lipstick, hoping that Tuomas would like that, and some new eyeshadows. After some hesitation she stepped into a lingerie store and went out with three new bras and thongs. She prayed to God that one day, Tuomas would be able to see them on her.  
She sat at home, reading Slow Love Slow, hoping he wouldn't call.  
He didn't.  
He also didn't call at Saturday.  
Tarja looked at the clock and moaned. It wasn't even twelve o'clock yet and he wouldn't arrive before half past three.  
Tarja made herself something edible and after she had slung it down, forcing herself to eat something even though she wasn't hungry, she moved around her apartment to tidy the rooms, which wasn't really necessary. Her apartment was always clean and tidy.  
She sat down in front of the piano and practised again, after all the son of Kirsti Nortia-Holopainen would play here soon. Practising wasn't necessary though, she would look stupid next to him anyway.  
With a groan she moved down to her car at half past two, she couldn't concentrate anymore.  
She drove to the city centre again and bought two cups of coffee, then she slowly drove to the railway station, careful not to make the cups fall, to wait for him.

The train was late again, as always. Tuomas' heart jumped as he spotted the beautiful dark haired clad in a grey coat, a claret scarf wrapped around her neck. Her lips had a lovely shade, fitting to her scarf, and her smile made his breath go caught again.  
He shivered as he got out if the train and he couldn't believe it as Tarja pulled him in a quick hug. "Hey, how are you?", she asked as she let go of him.  
His mouth went dry as she took his hand and pulled him towards the exit.  
"I'm fine", he said with a smile, his eyes hanging on their entwined hands.  
She pulled him to the car and opened the door for him. "The coffee is for you", she said and crossed the car. Tuomas laughed a little, she seemed to be nervous. She was so cute (and she had bought a cup of coffee for him, which was already cold, though).  
She had to start the car twice because she was too nervous to start it at the first try.  
"Tarja?", Tuomas asked after she had succeeded.  
"Hm?", Tarja asked and shoved her glasses back to the root of her nose.  
"The coffee is cold", Tuomas stated and Tarja grew deep red. "How long have you been waiting?"  
"A while", Tarja said softly and Tuomas smiled. She was too cute ...  
"So ... Where are we driving?", Tuomas asked after a few minutes of silence. "The school has a piano, right?"  
Tarja snorted. "That ugly, old piece of wood, yeah. No, we'll drive to my home, I have a real piano. A real, grand piano."  
Tuomas' heart stood still again.  
He would visit her at home. She was bringing him into her home.  
She wanted to show him her grand piano.


	17. Chapter 17

Tuomas slowly stepped in and looked around.  
Her apartment was really tidy. Beautiful. The cupboards were in a creamy white and so was the floor. The wooden table was in a dark brown colour, and the leather couch had the same colour as the cupboards.  
"You have a beautiful home." Tuomas complimented and stepped further into the living room. "And where's your piano?"  
"In the bedroom." Tarja said and couldn't hide a blush. "It fitted better with the furniture there." 'And it's a great place to have sex on ... well. I think so. I don't know ... yet.'  
"Okay then may I?" Tuomas asked and put his hand on the white door in the living room, only guessing that this was the bedroom.  
"You may." Tarja answered. "I'll get something to drink for you. What do you want? I have bourbon, whiskey, vodka -"  
"Water, please." Tuomas said a little uncomfortably and Tarja laughed.  
"The only 'hard' thing I have would be sparkling wine anyway. You know I don't drink hard things," she giggled and Tuomas blushed. He quickly looked away or soon he'd have a hard thing as well.  
He opened the door to her bedroom while Tarja vanished in the kitchen.  
"What the fuck?", Tarja whispered and hit her forehead with her flat hand. 'What a stupid joke! I have bourbon, whiskey, vodka. Of course he didn't laugh! I can't believe myself.'  
Still cursing herself in her mind, she prepared two glasses of water, throwing a few ice cubes into both of them.

Tuomas was amazed by the beauty of her piano.  
It was black, deep black and really huge. His keyboard was nothing compared to this masterpiece of a piano. He let his fingers run over the keys and smiled.  
He had honestly never seen such a beautiful piano as hers was.  
'Of course her piano is beautiful. It only can be beautiful, look at her!'  
He turned around and took in the rest of the room. Now he knew why she had said it fitted with the rest of the bedroom. The walls were white, the bed was mainly black (the blanket and pillow were white, but the rest was black). The nightstands were black. The floor was white and the closet was black as well.  
And what was that? It was black and was lying on the bed ...  
Tuomas squinted his eyes and stepped closer to the bed. It looked like a -  
Tuomas jumped back.  
It was a vibrator!  
He started shivering madly. Had she used it before she had picked him up? Oh god ...  
Tuomas could feel himself getting harder, so he quickly swung a leg over the bench of the piano and pulled himself close. He started playing a quick but beautiful melody, a melody that would help him coming down.  
And he did, shortly before Tarja stepped in. "Wow!", she breathed and put the glasses down on the piano. "Beautiful."  
"Just came through my mind." Tuomas shrugged it off and Tarja's mouth went open.  
"What?! Oh my - you just invented that?"  
"Here's the first hint, Tarja. Play a melody without thinking of anything and if it sounds beautiful, write it down."  
"Oh okay", Tarja said with a smile and then she saw the vibrator. "Oh! Fuck ..."  
"Pardon?" Tuomas asked and straightened his back.  
"N - nothing!" Tarja breathed and moved to her bed, quickly grabbing the black object, stuffing it into the drawer of her nightstand.  
Tuomas closed his eyes. Nope, she definitely hadn't wanted him to see it.  
Tarja sat down next to Tuomas, her hands shaking.  
"Don't be nervous," Tuomas said gently. "Did you already think of a melody for Ever Dream?"  
Tarja nodded, put her hands on the keys and started playing.  
And she played so wonderfully, Tuomas soon had wet cheeks, traces of tears marking his face.  
She was an amazing player. And she had said she didn't play good! She could give concerts!  
And as Tarja repeated playing the melody and started singing, Tuomas almost lost it.  
"Ever felt away with me," she sung, "just once, that all I need ... Entwined in finding you one day ..."  
She stopped playing because the breath in her neck distracted her.  
"Tuomas, you're distracting me" Tarja said quietly and closed her eyes as the breath in her neck got warmer.  
He was coming closer. "Do I?" he asked, very close to her ear.  
"Yeah ..." Tarja whispered, praying he would kiss the sensitive skin of her neck.  
But he stepped back. "Sorry. Just wanted to observe your playing technique."  
"No!" Tarja immediately cried. "Go on! I'm sorry, Tuomas, I didn't know you needed to watch my playing from behind me."  
"Well, it's easier for me to correct you, then." Tuomas said and slung his arms around the fragile figure in front of him, putting his hands on hers. "See?"  
Tarja nodded, she was too stunned by what had just happened.  
He was practically hugging her.  
Tarja closed her eyes again and leaned back a little, soon her head was touching his chest.  
"Ever felt away with me ..." she started singing while Tuomas moved his hands along with hers, playing the melody of Ever Dream together with the owner of those small and soft hands, who had created this wonderful melody.

They played the whole afternoon, not caring about the time. Tuomas had developed from a student to a teacher, to Tarja's personal piano teacher.  
"Funny," Tarja said as the thought crossed her mind, "I thought I was your teacher."  
"Well, we're both teachers." Tuomas said and guided Tarja's delicate hands over the keys, finding the next note for Passion And The Opera. "There ..."  
"Tuomas, it's late!" Tarja suddenly said a little shocked. "Shall I drive you home?"  
But Tuomas shook his head. "No need to. There's a hotel I already slept in a few times, it would be nice if you drove me there."  
"A hotel?", Tarja asked. "You'd pay a hotel for one night? Oh no, I won't let you. You'll sleep here."  
Tuomas first didn't know if he had understood her right. "What?"  
"You can sleep on my couch, that's no problem."  
"Tarja ... I'm your student", Tuomas said a little unsure.  
"This weekend I am your student", Tarja said sweetly and Tuomas tried anew.  
"I could be a raper or killer."  
Tarja lifted up one eyebrow and eyes him from head to toe. "If you're a raper who thinks of sex as love making, you better tell it to me quickly." Tarja said a little challenging and Tuomas blushed.  
"I am not a raper," he mumbled and turned his head away. 'But I wish you would rape me ... Oh gosh, Tuo. You're so pathetic. But hell, look at her ...'  
"Alright, now that this discussion is over I'll prepare your bed." Tarja said and went out of the bedroom, running her hand over Tuomas' head and hair as she passed him.  
'What a flirt ...'

Nothing important happened, of course. Both of them were sensible enough not to let anything happen, even though the sexual tension between them was almost unbearable. Tarja ordered two pizzas at ten and they ate it in front of her TV, watching a stupid horror movie (in Tarja's eyes it was stupid, in Tuomas' eyes it was really creepy).  
They went to bed at midnight, but both couldn't sleep.  
Tuomas had her scent in his nose, the pillow and the whole room smelled like her, like coconut and vanilla ... and something third, something flowery, and Tarja couldn't believe that a man was sleeping in her living room, alone.  
And she hadn't fucked with him.  
... Because he was her student.  
She still could slap herself for leaving her vibrator on the bed and she sent a prayer to God that he hadn't seen it.  
Finally, at two, Tarja drifted into a steady sleep, while Tuomas simply couldn't sleep.  
a) he was in Tarja Turunen's apartment  
b) he was about to sleep there  
c) she was a wonderful person to be with  
d) she was sleeping very, very close to him  
e - z) he was totally and nonsensically in love with her, wasn't afraid to admit it, and wasn't afraid of showing it (he was only afraid that she didn't even like him back a little).  
Oh, and the new lines of Passion And The Opera also wouldn't leave his mind.  
Naked limbs reflecting from the moon, I'll be there for you soon! First wish for his night:  
Let me be your delight.  
Body of a virgin, soul to the devil's kin.  
Your God is me - in all that you see.  
Tuomas couldn't believe that she maybe meant what she had written - she wanted to be 'his delight'? 'Body of a virgin', this was clearer, he was the virgin. 'Your God is me in all that you see'.  
Tuomas couldn't sleep.

Eventually he fell asleep at half past two in the night.  
Tarja woke up at half past nine, and as she crossed the living room, her eyes fell on the peaceful slumbering Tuomas.  
He was so beautiful ...  
Her gaze rested on the sleeping figure for a few minutes, then she tiptoed to the kitchen, intending to prepare a little breakfast for herself and her student/teacher.  
Her heart was beating as she thought back of their piano lesson (more like lessons) the day before.  
How he had circled his arms around her, how he had touched her hands to guide them, how he had lowered his voice, how he had breathed into her neck ...  
And how she had imagined him taking her right there, on her piano, how he had made her scream out in pleasure. In her imagination.  
Tarja closed her eyes as she stood in front of the kitchen window, letting another daydream pass her mind.  
"Good morning, my beauty", he whispers and slings his arms around me. He pulls me close and presses a kiss on my cheek.  
"Morning, lover", I purr. "You were perfect last night ..."  
"How can't I be if I get to make love to you ..."  
I turn around and cup his face, locking our eyes. "Finally someone who really makes love to me ... I love you, Tuomas ..."  
"And I love you, Tarja ..."  
"Tarja?"  
Tarja got the worst shock as he suddenly stood behind him. In real.  
He grinned at her. "Good morning."  
"Uh - good morning, Tuomas," she said and tried to collect her thoughts. "Slept well?"  
"Mhm", Tuomas said. "Can I help you here?"  
"Nope," Tarja said. "You're my guest so sit down and shut up."  
"Okay, Miss Turunen." Tuomas chuckled. He sat down at the kitchen table, admiring her backside as she prepared the breakfast. She was wearing a wider top and long pants, Tuomas assumed it was either her pajamas or her comfortable outfit for home. Either way, she looked stunning.  
Her hair was open and hung down until the midst of her back in soft waves (this made Tuomas guess she was flatting her hair usually), her body was moving aesthetically as she first poured some coffee in two cups, then moved to the fridge to get out some butter and marmalade ...  
'This is something I could get used to,' Tuomas thought as his eyes hung on her moving ass.  
Sadly he had noticed that she was already wearing her make up, which made it impossible for him to find out how she looked in natural. But he knew that she had to look stunning, she was such a beauty, Tuomas was sure she was a beauty without her daily make up as well.  
"Do you like sweet or sour?" Tarja suddenly asked and Tuomas looked up, noticing that she hadn't turned around.  
"Huh?"  
"Do you rather eat cheese, ham, tomatoes and so on or butter and marmalade?" she asked again, now turning around to face him.  
"Mh - sweet please", Tuomas answered and Tarja smiled.  
'I could give you something sweet,' she thought and turned around. She moved her hips a little more as she cut the bread, hoping he'd look at her.  
And he did.  
'What a tease,' Tuomas thought and bit his lower lip to prevent the urge to moan loudly. 'Look at her ...'  
She was so, so sexy.  
Within a second he was by her side. "Are you sure I can't help you?", he asked gently.  
"I'm sure, Tuomas, go back to your seat", she ordered in a teacher-like voice. "This is my apartment, of course I can deal with it alone."  
"Just asking", Tuomas said. "I've been raised to be polite and courteous."  
'I've noticed.' Tarja thought and smiled at him. "Thank you, but it's okay."  
But Tuomas didn't move.  
His mouth slowly went open as he moved closer. He observed her beauty with a beating heart, his eyes slowly trailed down over her naked arms to her gentle hands, which were cutting the bread gracefully. Almost in slow motion her head turned to him and she smiled at him. "What?"  
"N-nothing. You're just ... beautiful." He breathed the last word and Tarja blushed.  
"Why, thank you ... Even though I'm not used to a student telling me I am ..."  
"But you know you are, right?", Tuomas asked and raised a brow. "You know you're beautiful, that's why you're not shy at all."  
"You think?" Tarja said with a smile. "You think that's the reason I'm not shy?"  
Tuomas nodded. "Of course. And that's probably the reason why you kissed me, right?"  
Tarja's eyes snapped open and the knife fell on the kitchen counter. "I did what?!"


	18. Chapter 18

"Of course. And that's probably the reason why you kissed me, right?"  
Tarja's eyes snapped open and the knife fell on the kitchen counter. "I did what?!"  
"Or didn't you?" Tuomas asked calmly. "I had quite a high temperature, I'm not sure if I maybe hallucinated."  
"Oh, you're talking about last Tuesday?" Tarja said with shivering hands. He had noticed ... Tarja had thought he had been too ill to notice her lips brushing against his. "You must have imagined that, I'm sorry. I didn't ... I didn't kiss you."  
"That's okay, I didn't think so anyway," Tuomas chuckled, quite disappointed.  
"Let's just not talk about it anymore, okay?" Tarja said softly and Tuomas agreed.  
He went back to the table, wanting to slap himself. Why had he said that?! He hadn't been sure about the fact she had kissed him, so why had he tried?!  
Tarja felt something similar.  
She was glad that he had moved, or he would have seen her deep red face. 'Why did I even kiss him?! I'm so stupid ... Oh damn, he has noticed ... I hope he really believes he hallucinated. Or maybe he feels the same as I do ... Damn, it just can't be. I'm in love and it happens to be a student ...'  
'Look at her,' Tuomas thought. 'She has stopped cutting the bread but she hasn't turned around yet. Oh gosh, even her backside is too beautiful to be real. Her ass ... I could stare on it for hours. I wish she wore short pants. I'd love to see her beautiful legs ... Part them ... Give myself to her ... No. Oh no.'  
Tuomas pressed his fist on his slowly growing hardness. 'Not now, not now ...'  
"I'll be in the bathroom," he quickly informed Tarja and stood up, rushing out of the kitchen as fast as possible.  
"Alright!" Tarja shouted after him.  
Tuomas locked the bathroom door and sat down at the edge of the bathtub.  
"Calm down ..." he whispered and tried to distract himself with something.  
He knew it wasn't polite, but it was the only way to help him, so he started walking around the bathroom, looking at everything closely. He opened every drawer (Tarja seemed to only have beige and brown towels). He found many shower gels in various scents (vanilla, coconut and hibiscus - now he know what that flowery scent had been) and shampoos and conditioner which also smelled like vanilla.  
'I have to smell her hair,' Tuomas decided before he went to the mirror shelf and noticed that said mirror consisted of two doors. He carefully opened the right side, revealing lots of make up.  
Loads of.  
Countless shades of lipstick, hundred different eye shadows, about ten mascaras, blusher, pincers, various eyebrow pencils, eyeliners, ...  
Tuomas shook his head. Why? He knew she was beautiful without all that stuff. He carefully took a pot into his hand and snorted as he saw what it was.  
Night cream, anti age.  
As if she needed that already! Tuomas shook his head again and closed the right side, opening the left side right after.  
And it seemed to be a little pharmacy in there! Pills against fever (paracetamol, now he knew that already), something called 'Ascorbic acid', then something with the ingredient 'acetylcysteine', and something with the ingredient 'oestrogen'.  
"Miranda", Tuomas mumbled and observed the pink package with the funny name. How could a medicine be called 'Miranda'? He opened it and pulled out the tablets. All of them were pink and it seemed as if she had to take them everyday, since there was a little calendar in which she had to make a cross whenever she had taken one, besides about four days once a month where she didn't have to -  
Tuomas almost dropped the pills called Miranda.  
'The anti baby pill!' he thought panicking and put them back, next to a package of Durex. He took them as well and peeked in nosily - the package was almost empty.  
It hurt Tuomas, even though he had no right to.  
'You know she's sexually active,' he told himself. 'I mean how couldn't she ... Look at her.'  
He put the package back again and closed the left door. He had definitely calmed down enough.  
As he reached the kitchen, the breakfast was already done and Tarja was sitting in front of her cup of coffee and the newspaper. "Done?" she asked and Tuomas sat down wordlessly. He only nodded. He couldn't stop thinking about what he had discovered.  
'She's sexually active and she takes the anti baby pill ... Well, of course. She wouldn't want to get pregnant from a one night stand, right? Gosh I can't imagine her pregnant ... But if I am the father, then maybe ... No. Stop it!'  
"Tuomas?"  
"Yes, Tarja? I'm sorry, I was in thoughts."  
"I've noticed." Tarja smiled. "I just wanted to ask you if you already found your true love? I remember us talking in the bar and I was wondering since that was already more than a month ago."  
"You're right, it was already about five weeks ago", Tuomas said surprised. "But no, Tarja. I guess it's because I'm young and not really looking for her." 'Because she's sitting opposite of me.' "I still have some time right?"  
At that, Tarja smiled almost sadly and Tuomas swallowed. "And what about you ...?"  
"Nothing", Tarja sighed. "I haven't gone out for almost four weeks. Means, I haven't met a single man in four weeks." 'Means I haven't had sex with anyone than myself in four weeks, if you don't count that feeling less fucking that Oliver did to me last week,' she added in thoughts and Tuomas thought the same.  
'Then she's abstinent?! Well, besides with herself, that vibrator yesterday told everything ...' Tuomas cleared his throat. "I'm proud of you. And hey, there are many ways to meet your right one. You've also met Mr Jokinen at school."  
"Again," Tarja snorted and put the newspaper down. "That was a big mistake! Not as big as the mistake I made with my first boyfriend, but Oliver comes right after. I will never date a colleague again, never ever!"  
Tuomas took a sip of his coffee. Good to hear, this way he could stop thinking about Mr Jokinen as a rival.

No one of them said a word about Tuomas needing to drive home, so Tuomas simply stayed in Helsinki until the evening was there. But until then, Tarja and Tuomas played the piano again, invented a melody for the now finished Passion And The Opera, they played a card game, they talked and had fun. As Tuomas finally said he would drive home, Tarja offered him to bring him home. Tuomas declined the offer politely, but he couldn't decline as Tarja offered him to bring him to the railway station.  
They got out of her apartment and Tuomas wondered if he'd ever come there again.  
He walked to her black Ford almost automatically, but Tarja laughed and grabbed his hand. "Let's walk," she said with a smile. "It's such a nice evening."  
"Cold, in front of all," Tuomas said and Tarja looked up to him.  
"Are you freezing?" she asked gently and caressed his fingers with hers before she entwined them.  
Tuomas' mouth went dry. "A little," he mumbled and Tarja brought his hands up to her mouth, breathing against them gently. "Warmer?" she asked and Tuomas nodded.  
Her lips were so close to his skin ... she was holding his hand ... and she was breathing against it ...  
"Tarja -"  
"Yes?" Tarja's voice was barely audible.  
"On Tuesday as you drove me home," he softly started. "You ... you held my hand for the whole drive. I'm sure about that."  
Tarja nodded.  
"Why?" Tuomas asked and Tarja let his hands sink down.  
"I was afraid you'd faint," she said. "I wanted to keep you here somehow. And I was afraid you'd die of a high temperature in my car. Wouldn't have ended nicely for me."  
Tuomas smiled. "I didn't imagine the hand holding but I imagined the kiss?"  
Tarja's cheeks went red. "Well ... Yes ... I wouldn't kiss a student, or would I?"  
"You wouldn't," Tuomas whispered and then they continued walking.  
After a while they passed a little café and Tarja offered Tuomas to invite him for a cup of coffee.  
And even though he had said no, Tarja had pulled him inside with a laugh.  
She ordered two cups of cappuccino and they sat down.  
"You shouldn't have paid my coffee, Tarja." Tuomas said a little embarrassed.  
"But I wanted to," Tarja answered with a shrug. "It was nice with you. You taught me wonderful things on the piano and I didn't pay you for it."  
"I don't want to get paid for spending time with you," Tuomas admitted quietly. "I know who you are, I know how you are, and I know that you're a wonderful person to spend time with."  
Tarja blushed. "You really know what to tell me", she said softly. "Things I really wanna hear."  
Tuomas didn't answer first, he was too amazed by her words. Because last Tuesday she had said exactly the same, right before she had kissed him. Well, right before he thought she had kissed him. But she had said it, no doubt.  
"Tuomas? You look - hm. You look a little down."  
"I just - I ..." Tuomas swallowed and lowered his eyes. "Your eyes they are my paradise", he mumbled, a line that had just crossed his mind as he had looked at her. "You smile makes my sun rise ..."  
First Tarja looked at him in awe and then smiled sadly. 'I can tell he hasn't meant me. He's a poet, it was just one of his poetic lines ...' "Beautiful, Tuomas," she whispered.  
"So are you", Tuomas replied carefully, not looking at her directly.  
The real reason why he looked down was, that he didn't want to love her. Of course he felt a deep connection between them, he loved her with every part of his body, but he knew that this love was impossible. And that was why he didn't want to love her.  
Tarja had blushed again.  
'Why is he like that? Well, maybe he does like me ... But I'm his teacher! But what if he only wants to get better grades ... No. No student would do that to get better grades, besides that he's good in ME. No ... He's slightly shivering. What if he feels something for me? That'd be a job to write for Raava Holopainen. What if I take his hand now ...'  
And Tarja did. She took his hand and his cheeks went red. "Tarja ...", he whispered without looking at her. "Why are you holding my hand again?"  
"I don't know," Tarja admitted and winked. "I like the feeling."  
Tuomas smiled at her. "You're flirting ..."  
"We always do during lesson, don't we?" Tarja countered and winked again.  
"Guess we do," Tuomas chuckled and got a light shock as he felt her foot rub against his calf under the table. "Now this is even better," he said surprised and Tarja smiled again, pulling up her eyebrows at him.  
"Do you like this? You like this, huh?" she whispered and caressed his whole lower leg with her now bare foot, she had stripped off her shoe already.  
"You tease," Tuomas whispered back and Tarja giggled.  
"Oh, you know I love to tease," she said and winked at him again. Tuomas reacted quickly and grabbed her foot under the table - slowly he ran his index finger along the sole of her foot. "Let go! That tickles!" Tarja begged, but Tuomas shook his head.  
"Stop teasing me and I will," he said gently.  
"I'll stop, I promise," Tarja said depressed and Tuomas let go of her foot. But instead of pulling it back, she let her foot rest on Tuomas' thigh. "May I?" she asked and Tuomas nodded, his mouth dry.  
Did she seek for body contact? It seemed so ...  
They drank their coffees, their hands still entwined. They avoided each other's looks, because every time their eyes met, their cheeks blushed madly.  
After a while it was time for Tuomas to go, after all he had a train to reach. They continued walking side by side, hands shyly holding. And as they reached the railway station, neither Tuomas nor Tarja wanted to let go.  
"Well, see you tomorrow," Tarja said and Tuomas nodded.  
"Thanks for letting me sleep at your place", he said and lifted her hand up to his lips. "I owe you."  
Tarja closed her eyes, holding her breath for a short time, as his lips touched her skin, and as she opened her eyes again, Tuomas was studying her face from close.  
Tarja immediately jumped back. "You startled me!" she said, not telling him the real reason why she didn't like someone to look at her from close, especially not him.  
Because she felt old and didn't want him to know how many crinkles she already had.  
"Sorry but your face is just too mesmerizing", Tuomas said in a serious voice and Tarja took a step forward, hugging him tight.  
"You deserve to find your true love soon, Tuomas," she stated. "You definitely deserve it."  
Tuomas smiled, thinking about the fact that his true love was in his arms right now ...


	19. Chapter 19

The next day Tarja wore a red leather jacket and a fitting red necklace. Tuomas sat down in the first row again, he always did lately. Linn was already used to that, but she thought he did because Tarja was always scolding them (boy, if she knew the real reason).  
Tarja and Tuomas were flirting the whole lesson, smiling at each other, winking at each other when no one looked at the teacher. While everyone was working, Tarja moved from student to student, looking at every student's paper for a while. And when she looked at Tuomas' paper, her hand touched his. Tuomas smiled up to her and Tarja blushed lightly.  
She couldn't get enough if his smile, and he couldn't get enough of hers.  
Tarja caressed Tuomas' hand for a few seconds and then she moved to the next desk.  
While Tuomas' eyes were hanging on her ass, which she moved only for him, that he was sure about.  
'How I want to grab it,' Tuomas thought desperately. 'How I want to squeeze it.'  
He just couldn't believe that he was thinking like this about his teacher, but she was so beautiful and sexy ...  
Tuomas thought back of the day before, especially as she had caressed his leg with her foot ... And another day before when they had played the piano ... When Tuomas had brought his arms about the woman to guide her hands ...  
He barely paid attention to what Tarja said and Tarja noticed that, but since she knew that she was the reason for his confusion, she enjoyed it and didn't scold him for not paying attention. He somehow was paying attention to her after all, he paid attention to her ass maybe, but still (of course Tarja had noticed how his eyes had shot up as she had turned around and since then she had known that he had looked at her ass).  
Both didn't want to go as the bell rang, so Tuomas stayed extra long again. And as everyone had left the room, he stepped forward. "Hi," he said gently and Tarja smiled up to him.  
"Hi, Tuomas. How are you?"  
Tuomas blushed a little. "I'm fine ... I wanted to thank you again for letting me sleep at your place."  
"No Problem," Tarja said and stood up.  
Tuomas held his breath. She was so close ... And somehow she was so tiny compared to him. It was funny since she was almost ten years older ... Even though height had nothing to do with age.  
"Tuomas," she whispered and Tuomas' heart started racing as she took his hand. "I wondered ... I wondered if you want to go on ... With being my piano teacher ..."  
"Of course," Tuomas immediately whispered. "That'd be an honour, Tarja. Yes, I want to."  
"Great!" Tarja beamed up to him. "Tell me how much you want in an hour."  
Tuomas raised his brows. "How much what?"  
"Money!" Tarja said and Tuomas shook his head.  
"You don't have to pay."  
"Better be careful, I could exploit you." Tarja said with a wink. "How does thirty Euros sound?"  
"In an hour??", Tuomas asked. "No, Tarja. Fifteen would be okay as well."  
"Thirty and now shush, I don't want to hear another word from you," Tarja said and put her index finger on his chest, applying a little pressure.  
"What are you doing?", Tuomas asked lowly as she laid her hand down on his chest.  
"I don't know ..." Tarja mumbled. "I could hear your heartbeat and wanted to feel it ..."  
Tuomas swallowed. Had his heart beaten so loudly??  
He gently placed his hand over hers. 'It's beating only for you,' he thought, desperately wishing he could say it out loud.  
He opened his mouth to tell her, but in the last second he changed his mind and said something else he was thinking.  
"You smell good."  
Tarja looked at him in surprise. "I smell good?"  
Tuomas nodded. "Your hair. It smells like vanilla and coconut."  
Tarja smiled shyly. "Do you like it?"  
Tuomas nodded dully and pulled her hand away from his chest. "I like it. And I wish we could talk on but I have to go ..."  
"Wait," Tarja said. "The piano lessons. What about every Friday?"  
"If once a week is enough for you?" Tuomas asked and nodded. "Every Friday at three?"  
"Once a week is enough," Tarja decided. "I play everyday, so it doesn't matter if you came once or even thrice a week. And three o'clock sounds good."  
"Great," Tuomas said gently. "Then I'll be at your apartment at three."  
They smiled at each other for a while.  
Tuomas admired the amazing green of her eyes while Tarja wanted to melt into those icy blue ones.  
They moved closer almost automatically and Tarja felt her knees go wobbly as Tuomas closed his eyes.  
She closed hers as well, their lips were now merely a few inches apart -  
"Tarja? Are you there?"  
Tuomas jumped back and Tarja let herself fall back into her chair, only a second before Mr Jokinen entered the classroom.  
Tuomas felt the blood rush into his head and the urge to punch the handsome teacher, especially as Tarja smiled at him.  
"I'm here, Oliver. Tuomas only had a question."  
"But you already explained it to me very well," Tuomas added dryly. "Thanks for your patience, Miss Turunen. See you on Wednesday."  
And without another look at her, he turned around and went outside.  
They had almost kissed ...

They had almost kissed!  
Tarja first had to calm down her heartbeat. Oliver stepped closer and observed her. "Are you okay?"  
"Why?" Tarja asked.  
"You're smiling," Oliver grinned a little. "Normally you wear a mean frown the whole day ..."  
"Oh," Tarja said and failed as she tried getting back to said frown. "Well. Guess it's because you're here," she started flirting, but Oliver wasn't in the mood to flirt. He directly pulled her out of the chair and pressed her against the desk, starting to kiss and bite her neck in frustration.  
He ripped her black blouse open and began to suck her skin greedily.  
Tarja closed her eyes as he took her once again, wishing he'd do it slowly and tenderly. Wishing it was Tuomas who'd took her slowly and tenderly ...  
Oliver came with a loud groan and when he was done he slipped out of her, ignoring her soft whimpers as his hard love making hurt her. He pulled up his jeans and left the classroom, leaving Tarja back on the desk without even thanking her, nor apologising.  
And Tarja was crying.  
Her genitals were sore and she felt so used.  
She got off of the desk, still whimpering. Walking hurt too much, so she had to sit down ...  
"This has to stop", Tarja whispered and gently touched her sore genitals.  
She was bleeding.  
"Fuck", Tarja whispered, not sure if she was bleeding because Oliver had been too violent or if she had gotten her period. But deep inside she knew ...  
The rest of the day she was grumpy again. She screamed at the students more than ever and the confused students didn't know what to do. She had been so happy last week! What had happened?

Later, Tuomas heard about the beautiful teacher's grumpiness and decided to visit her before he went home. He played hooky in English (he was too good in that subject anyway) and went to Tarja's classroom. He knocked after making sure that she didn't have a lesson.  
"What?!" she answered grumpily and Tuomas opened the door.  
"Tarja ...?"  
"Tuomas," Tarja whispered, avoiding his look. "Please go ..."  
But Tuomas entered. "Are you in a bad mood? What happened?" he asked and came to stand next to the desk.  
"Nothing," Tarja said, her voice still grumpy.  
Tuomas chuckled. "You need something sweet," he started to flirt and Tarja looked at him.  
"Something sweet ...?"  
Tuomas grinned and pulled a pack of Fazer out of his bag. "For you," he said gently, his voice almost inaudible.  
"Oh, Tuomas," Tarja said and smiled lovingly. "That's so cute of you ..."  
"I don't know what happened but I guessed you needed a encouragement."  
"You're so attentive," Tarja mumbled and took the chocolate bar from his soft hands, grazing his fingers with hers.  
"Tell me if you need help, okay?" Tuomas demanded. "No matter what."  
Tarja nodded. "I will. Thank you."  
Tuomas smiled at her, wondering if she would kiss him now. After all they had gotten interrupted before ...  
But she didn't stand up.  
"I'll drive home now," Tuomas announced and Tarja nodded.  
"See you," she said. "And thank you again." She looked at the chocolate bar.   
"No need", Tuomas said gently and smiled at her.  
But Tarja didn't smile back ...  
Tuomas sensed that she was either sad or hurt.  
Had Oliver done something to her?

He was so, so attentive.  
Tarja broke off a rib of her chocolate bar and shoved it into her mouth slowly. She closed her eyes and sighed, smiling lowly as she sucked. Tuomas really knew how to turn her bad mood into a better one. The second she had seen him, her heart had started beating and she had thought of Friday and their piano lesson immediately. And then he had given her a bar of Fazer, which was almost a love declaration in her opinion.  
'Don't be silly, he doesn't love you,' Tarja told herself but she wished it so much ...

Tuomas opened his calendar book and added Piano lesson on following Friday. After some hesitation, he wrote at T's home beneath the appointment and after another while of staring at the little T, he drew a heart around it.  
It was silly, but what could he do? He wanted to draw hearts everywhere ...  
Tuomas leaned back in his seat and closed his eyes, a little daydream playing in his mind ...  
"That's it, Tarja. That's exactly the tone I wanted to hear from you."  
Tarja presses the right key again and smiles at me. "And again," she says. "This one -" she presses the one from before again, "and this." And repeats the other one. "Right?"  
"Perfect," I say and smile at her. "You learn quickly."  
"I have a good teacher", Tarja flirts and I immediately flirt back.  
"Well, so do I ..."  
We look at each other for a felt eternity, but then she touches my chin. She smiles as she caresses my hair and gently pulls me closer.  
"Have you ever kissed a teacher?" she whispers and I get red.  
"No ..."  
"Then it's about time," Tarja says, her lips almost touching mine. "Maybe she could teach you a lot ... Or the other way round ..."  
"Just kiss me," I beg and Tarja chuckles, before she closes the gap between our lips.  
Tuomas opened his eyes again and sighed. 'Damn, I want this so badly.'  
He closed the booklet, sighing once again. He still couldn't believe he was in love with his teacher ...

Tarja couldn't believe she was in love with her student.  
But fact was, she was standing in front of her wall calendar and writing the appointment into the blank space with a smile.  
Piano lesson with Tuomas, she had written. Here, she now added and drew a little note next to the appointment.  
Then she placed herself in front of her piano, and while sucking another piece of Fazer (and trying to forget about Oliver and his loveless 'love making' this day), she started playing a new, slow and beautiful melody and writing it down, such as Tuomas had told her to.  
After a while she started singing, a random text that just crossed her mind when she thought of Tuomas ... His smile ... She was forever his, she knew for sure.  
"Fare thee well, little broken heart ... Downcast eyes, lifetime loneliness. Whatever walks in my heart will walk alone ..."  
She played another few tunes, wrote them down and sighed, before she went on singing, wondering if Tuomas would like this song.  
"Constant longing for the perfect soul. Unwashed scenery forever gone ... Whatever walks in my heart will walk alone ..."


	20. Chapter 20

The next days passed without any other incident.  
Tarja and Tuomas flirted whenever they had time to, and Tarja succeeded fleeing from Oliver by telling him she was having her period (the only thing that kept him away from taking her).  
And faster as if someone would have thought, it was Friday.  
Tuomas had insisted in taking the bus, even though Tarja had offered him to pick him up.  
He had declined (in his polite way) and right now he was shivering in await and nervousness.  
He arrived a little after three, since he hadn't found her block immediately, but then he had remembered the little alley they had walked through and after finding it, he had also found her block of flats.  
And as he stood in front of her flat, he could already hear the soft sounding of her piano and he also heard her strong voice singing a beautiful song. Gosh, her voice was so amazing ...  
He couldn't hear what she was singing, but it sounded amazing without a doubt. Tuomas collected all his courage and rang the doorbell, but the only reply he got was Tarja singing only louder.  
Didn't she hear him?  
Tuomas rang the doorbell again and then carefully entered.  
"No love left in me, no eyes to see the heaven beside me ..." he could hear her sing and carefully approached her bedroom. As he entered, he could only make out her back, which was moving back and forth as she gave everything into playing and singing. It looked so erotic ... Tuomas swallowed.  
"My time is yet to come, so I'll be forever yours," she sang and abruptly ended as Tuomas started applauding.  
"Tuomas!" she said in a shocked voice.  
"Sorry for entering, but you didn't hear the doorbell," Tuomas said with a blush and Tarja laughed.  
"Oh. It's okay, but you startled me. Did you like the song?"  
"Loved it," Tuomas admitted. "Did you write it?"  
Tarja nodded proudly. "It's not the best and it's not even good either. I'm just a bad songwriter." She sighed. "I'm still looking for a song to perform at the Christmas party."  
"You perform at a Christmas party?" Tuomas asked. "Wow, where??"  
"At the university," Tarja laughed. "Every year, because they can't afford a real musician. And every year I have to perform an own song. Maybe Forever Yours is this year's chosen song ..."  
Tuomas stepped closer and sat down next to Tarja. "You allow?" he asked and put his hands on the keys. Tarja nodded and put her own hands away.  
"This melody has been floating around my head for quite a time alredy," he told her and started playing a wonderful melody. "If you want, I can think of a text ..."  
"We could both think of a text," Tarja replied gently.  
"We could ..." Tuomas mumbled and put his hands away to let her play what he had showed her.  
"Violent hands come at midnight," Tuomas mumbled. "Hold me down, I can't make a sound ..."  
"Wow!" Tarja said and stopped playing. "It sounds as if you're describing a rape."  
"I didn't intend to," Tuomas said with squinted eyes. "It can also be very erotic ..."  
"Either way, I don't know if it fits for the school's Christmas party," Tarja said and Tuomas lifted his shoulders.  
"If you sing it in English, no one will get the sense of the text anyway ..."  
"You're right," Tarja said. "Go on, Mister Maestro." She winked at him and Tuomas played the next line.

For two hours they played, they played Ever Dream and Passion And The Opera again and Tuomas showed her a few more of his techniques. Tarja dared him to play a song without looking at the keys and promised him to invite him into a restaurant if he could play without looking. Of course Tuomas found that heavenly thrilling and after choosing a song he knew by heart, he let Tarja put a cloth around his eyes (this was even more thrilling for both of them) and he played. And of course he won, which made him wonder if this had been planned by Tarja, but she just hadn't been courageous enough to ask him out ...  
After two hours they stopped playing and decided to talk about that song that Tarja wanted to sing at the Christmas party.  
"Tell me a little more about the party," Tuomas demanded and Tarja sighed.  
"It's so stupid. It's every year at Friday before Christmas holidays and well, it's like a Christmas celebration for the whole school. And I can't even enjoy it because I always have to sing. The whole fucking evening."  
"It's next Friday, then," Tuomas said in surprise. "May I think about the song at home and give it to you on Monday?"  
"You'd do that?" Tarja asked surprised and Tuomas nodded.  
"Of course I would ..."  
Tarja smiled at him gently. "That would be so great, Tuomas ... Thank you ... Thank you for everything ..."  
An awkward silence was lying over the room as their eyes locked.  
"There's nothing to thank me for," Tuomas replied quietly, so quiet, she almost didn't hear it.  
They moved closer almost automatically, Tuomas had his eyes already closed.  
Tarja smiled and closed hers as well, their lips moved closer, they were soon touching and -  
Tarja embraced him before their lips met.  
"I've never thought my best friend would be one of my students," she chuckled and Tuomas smiled lightly.  
Best friend ... It hurt a little but at least he was a friend to her. And he was hugging her ... They had almost kissed again.  
His hands moved over her back and Tarja sighed quietly.  
'He seems to enjoy touching me. Maybe I should kiss him, just to see how he responds ...'  
But as she pulled her head away from his shoulder, she suddenly came to think of the consequences that would occur if she'd kiss him.  
"You'll get your money," Tarja so said and stood up quickly, running for her money. She paid two hours to him (sixty Euros, he protested but she didn't care) and then asked, "So, when would you have time for me? I mean because you won our little bet ... When would you go out with me? As friends?"  
Tarja went red as she dropped one clanger after the other.  
Tuomas smiled about her cuteness. "Well, in the Christmas holidays ... That be good I'd say."  
"December 26th?" Tarja asked as she walked over to he calendar.  
"Bad," Tuomas mumbled. "We'll celebrate my birthday then."  
Tarja mentally kicked herself as she remembered that the 25th was his birthday.  
"And the 27th? Or 28th?"  
"What do you do on new year's eve?" Tuomas asked and Tarja blushed again.  
"Nothing ..." she mumbled. "Yet."  
"Meet me then?" Tuomas asked shyly. "I know a nice Chinese restaurant a little outside Kitee ..."  
"That sounds great," Tarja mumbled and smiled at him.  
Their eyes locked again and for a few moments it was silent again, until Tarja spoke.  
"So ... Let's go on or ...?"  
"I have to catch the train at half past six," Tuomas said. "I'm sorry."  
"It's okay," Tarja said with a smile. "This time I'll drive you to the station and I won't take no as an answer."  
Tuomas chuckled but thanked her for her offer and a few minutes later they walked down to Tarja's car.  
Tuomas smiled as she put in Sonata Arctica again and hummed along one of the songs he didn't know yet.  
"They're pretty good," Tuomas said after the first song had ended and Tarja smiled.  
"They're my favourite band. Do you know them?"  
"Not good." Tuomas admitted. "My brother has one album, their first, but that's it."  
"You should listen to them," Tarja said, before she started singing along the next song loudly.  
And Tuomas' eyes clung on her, on her lips as she sang, her chest as it raised and sank rapidly, her whole body as it gave everything into singing ...  
Tuomas pressed his fists on his crotch as his jeans got tight.  
She was so hot ...  
"Are you alright? You look flushed," Tarja giggled. "Didn't you like it?"  
"I'm flushed because your voice is so amazingly stunning," Tuomas said lowly and Tarja laughed.  
"You don't look as if you liked it ... Oh, pity. We're there ..."  
Tarja stopped the car in front of the railway station and smiled at her teacher/student. "See you on Monday, huh?"  
"Yeah," Tuomas replied and grinned. "I'll finish this song, you'll see."  
"That'd be so amazing", Tarja said and winked at him. "You should go now, or you'll miss your train."  
"Wouldn't be too bad," Tuomas said with a light smile and Tarja's cheeks went light pink.  
"Enough now with the compliments", she scolded. "Go and catch your train."  
Tuomas smiled at his favourite teacher. "See you, Tarja ..."  
And Tarja smiled back. "Bye, Tuomas ..."  
Tuomas' thoughts were with her the whole drive to Kitee, maybe also because he was writing on her song.  
And after not even an hour he was done.

Violent hands come at midnight  
Hold me down  
I can't make a sound  
In their arms  
Still unwanted  
Crave the child  
Be forever wiled  
Stranger, danger  
Release me  
Mercy's hiding  
It let me go  
Hurts to know  
Mercy's watching  
Watching me drowning  
In rivers of lust  
Morning sun  
Break the shelter  
Turn back time  
Wash away my crime  
Betrayer, slayer  
Release me  
Mercy's hiding  
It let me go  
Hurts to know  
Mercy's watching  
Watching me drowning  
In rivers of lust  
Found at noon  
Clutching still the stone

Tuomas looked at his work, deep in thoughts. It really sounded like rape ... But as he closed his eyes and imagined Tarja singing it with the melody he was thinking about, he was literally dying inside.  
She had to sing it.

Tarja stared at the text.  
It was a rape. It was. And it wasn't any rape - it was about her. About what Oliver had done and still did to her.  
He raped her.  
Tarja's mind was turning and she had to sit down.  
'All the months I didn't realise it ... I just thought he took advantage of me, but he also fucked me when I said no ... He is raping me ...'  
"Tarja? Are you okay?"  
The green eyes met the sky blues and Tarja nodded.  
"It's beautiful, Tuomas. Sad, yet beautiful. You're very talented. I'm surprised you finished it this weekend."  
"I even finished it at Friday in the train," Tuomas admitted and Tarja had to smile.  
Again she saw how important she was to him.  
"It's about rape?"  
"Child abuse," Tuomas said quietly. "It fitted so well with the music I had in mind ..."  
"It's very sad," Tarja said and observed the tunes he had written over the words. "But at least it won't be hard to play on the piano."  
"Still, if you need help -" Tuomas offered with a blush. "Just call me."  
"Is your mother already annoying you because of this mysterious Soile?" Tarja giggled and Tuomas nodded.  
"Mother thinks she's my secret crush", Tuomas said and tried not to got red. She wasn't his crush, she was his true love.  
"And then you also meet her in your free time? Tsk tsk tsk, Tuomas." Tarja shook her head. "I should come up with another name."  
"Please not!", Tuomas called with a laugh. Soile, Linn and T - those three were more than enough.  
"Why not? I also have a third name, I can go on forever, Tuomas."  
Tuomas' mouth went dry. "May I hear it?" he asked shyly and Tarja smiled.  
"Susanna", she said gently and Tuomas laughed.  
"Like my sister."  
"Really?", Tarja asked and then her cheeks went pink. She quickly looked away. "Do you have a second name?"  
"Lauri," Tuomas answered. "Tuomas Lauri Johannes, if I'm proper."  
"Oh," Tarja mumbled, a shiver running down her spine. His voice was so deep ... "Beautiful ..."  
"Not as beautiful as Tarja Soile Susanna." Tuomas said gently and Tarja blushed heavier.  
"Do you ... Do you want to visit me tomorrow?" she asked shyly. "I know, it's not nice to spoil you like this but this Friday our piano lesson will be cancelled ... Could you come tomorrow for an hour? And - and maybe on Thursday as well? And after that we could watch a movie or so ..."  
Tuomas' heart was racing as he nodded. She sounded as if she really wanted to spend as much time as possible with him. "Of course. If you practise enough we can watch a movie after our lesson."  
"Great," Tarja said with a smile. "Just come over after you're done with university."  
Tuomas nodded and took her hand, pulling it up to her lips, as he always did when he said goodbye.  
"See you tomorrow, then," he said and Tarja nodded, trying to ignore her wobbly knees.  
He turned around and Tarja crashed back into her chair.  
This man ...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Song credits ... Do I really have to say that? Well, credits for "Rivers Of Lust" go to the wonderful Tarja Turunen❤]


	21. Chapter 21

And Tarja had practised enough.  
On Thursday in the afternoon, Tarja and Tuomas made their selves comfortable on Tarja's couch, both of them clutching a pack of chips, Tuomas' pepper flavoured, Tarja ate the normal salty flavoured.  
Tuomas had brought the movie, telling Tarja about its perfectness - it wasn't a stupid horror movie like thale last one, this was was classy.  
"And I don't have to pay you for the time you're here?" Tarja asked with a bad conscience as the movie started, but Tuomas laughed again.  
"Sure, if you want to pay me for watching a movie with you ..." He smiled at her. "It's my pleasure to spend time with you, Tarja," he said quietly and Tarja felt her face getting hot.  
"Same here ..." she replied softly and Tuomas' heart almost exploded with joy.  
He blindly seeked for her hand and as he found it, he squeezed it gently.  
They watched the movie in silence, it was a mystery thriller with a little romantic influence, much to Tarja's happiness. She wouldn't have survived another dumb horror movie like the last one. And also Tuomas wouldn't have survived it, but because of another reason than Tarja.  
After some time Tarja pulled away her hand and leaned a little closer to Tuomas, who didn't notice her closeness at first. But then he suddenly smelled her soft vanilla scent and looked at her ... And directly into her face.  
Their eyes sunken deep into the other's, Tuomas put an arm around his Love, while Tarja leaned her head against his chest. "Is that okay?" she whispered and Tuomas smiled.  
"More than okay ..." he whispered back and then both of them continued watching the movie.  
And as the movie was over, they remained in their position, both of them feeling comfortable the way it was.  
Tarja closed her eyes and listened to the beating of his heart, not quite believing that she was lying in the arms of a student. And that he had also his arm around her.  
"The Christmas party is tomorrow ..." she said quietly and looked up at him.  
"Are you nervous?" Tuomas asked gently and Tarja shook her head.  
"I never am."  
"Then why do you sound so worried?" Tuomas chuckled.  
"I don't know," Tarja whispered, even though she knew. She was afraid that Tuomas himself wouldn't like it. The party, her performance, ...  
Tuomas noticed the unsure shimmer in her eyes and brought his hand up to her cheek.  
He leaned in and studied her beautiful face, his heart clenching a little as he spotted some crinkles next to her eyes. After all she was older than him. A lot.  
"Do you want to sleep here?" Tarja suddenly asked and pulled back from his embrace abruptly. "If you want to, I need to prepare the couch."  
"If it's no problem for you?" Tuomas asked and Tarja shook her head.  
"Not at all," she replied with a smile and Tuomas grinned.  
"I have to tell my mum," he chuckled and Tarja giggled, pointing at the phone.  
"Please, call your mum to tell her you'll sleep at Soile's place."  
Tuomas grinned, while typing in the telephone number of the Holopainen family, thinking of what he'd really tell his mother ...  
"I'll go change," Tarja informed Tuomas and he nodded, already listening to the beeping of the telephone as it was connecting. Then his mother answered.  
"Holopainen?"  
"Mum. Hi. It's me", Tuomas greeted his mother.  
"Tuo! Where are you calling from?"  
"Mum, I better tell you right away, I won't come home tonight."  
"Are you sleeping at Soile's place?" Kirsti guessed and Tuomas closed his eyes ...  
"No," he said.  
"Linn's?" Kirsti asked on. "God, just tell me."  
"T." Tuomas answered and Kirsti gasped.  
"Are you -?!"  
"Not really," Tuomas quickly said. "Calm down, mother. I'm not sure ..."  
"So nothing will happen?" Kirsti asked in a warning tone and Tuomas sighed.  
"Definitely not," he said seriously and Kirsti laughed.  
"It's none of my business anyway. Protection is the magic word, boy. Alright?"  
"Shut up, mum," Tuomas groaned and Kirsti laughed loudly, so Tuomas crashed the earpiece back on the receiver.  
"Tuomas?" Tarja asked from the doorframe, realising that his face was dark red. "What did she say ...?"  
"That we should use protection", Tuomas said and let out a fake laugh. "And I told her to shut up."  
"I heard that," Tarja answered and giggled a little. "But what did you expect?"  
"Exactly that," Tuomas said with another groan and looked at her.  
And froze.  
This time she wore a silky dress which reached until above her knees.  
It was in a soft pink and it was floating down her body like a pink, silky waterfall ... It wasn't sexy but it was ...  
"Beautiful," Tuomas breathed and Tarja smiled.  
"It's new ... I hope I won't get a cold."  
"I'm here," Tuomas said with a dry mouth. "To warm you, I mean. If it's necessary ..."  
Tarja giggled again and Tuomas suddenly noticed that she acted like a young girl in love when she was with him.  
"Thank you," she then said in a sultry voice. "I will definitely call for you ..."  
Tuomas swallowed and as Tarja turned around to leave the living room, Tuomas almost fainted on his seat.

A while later they said good night to each other and Tuomas laid down on the couch, praying that this time he'd fall asleep faster than he had last time. He didn't, though, he couldn't get Tarja's appearance out of his mind.  
At one o'clock, he opened his eyes as he heard something coming from Tarja's bedroom door, and as he listened closer, he heard Tarja whisper his name.  
"Tuomas? Do you hear me? Are you awake?"  
Tuomas held his breath. The urge to answer her was big, but a feeling told him to pretend as if he was asleep.  
"Tuomas ..." Tarja whispered again. "I'm cold ... I'm freezing."  
Tuomas didn't reply, but he was afraid that she could hear his beating heart.  
"Do you want to cuddle?" Tarja now asked and Tuomas grinned into his pillow.  
Oh, this woman.  
"I mean it", Tarja mumbled. "I need you next to me ... I miss your arms around my body ... Like before ... I can't stop thinking about your hug."  
And this time Tuomas almost answered, but again his instinct told him not to. He would remain calm and wait for more, but Tarja went back to her room again.  
And still, Tuomas felt happy. She needed him ... Missed his arms around her ... She had wanted to cuddle with him ...  
'Tomorrow I will kiss her,' he decided.

As he woke up, the first thing he thought about was his plan.  
He wouldn't kiss her immediately, it had to wait until the Christmas party. Tarja would go off the little stage in the aula, and Tuomas would ask her to go a little outside with her. They would walk a little and then he would tell her how he felt ... Or should he kiss her first?  
Tuomas pressed his face into his pillow and groaned slightly. Why couldn't evening be there already?  
He jumped as a soft "Good morning" not far from him sounded, and as he lifted his head, he spotted Tarja standing in the doorframe.  
"Morning," Tuomas answered dully, stunned by her beauty.  
"Coffee?" Tarja asked and Tuomas nodded thankfully. Tarja turned around and walked back to the kitchen, Tuomas' eyes clinging on her swaying hips.  
'Wow ...'

While Tuomas drank his coffee, Tarja went to the bathroom to get dressed. Tuomas was walking through the living room while holding the mug, he just needed to sneak through her apartment a little. He looked through her books, internally cheering as he found every book of Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter, but mostly he found songbooks and books with piano compositions. He pulled out one of the books and flipped through it, opened a page where Tarja had put in a pink post it. Tuomas knew the song, his mother had always played it to him when he had been a toddler.  
Tuomas smiled and closed the book, looking at the next one in the row.  
Slow, Love, slow ...  
Tuomas swallowed and pulled it out, noticing that she must have finished it already. There was no bookmark in but the book's back looked as if she had already opened it a dozen of times ...  
"A great book," Tarja said, suddenly behind him.  
"You've already finished?" Tuomas asked in surprise and Tarja nodded.  
"I couldn't put it out of my hands," Tarja answered. "Well, besides the times I had to do it to myself because I was so turned on and wet ..."  
Tuomas, who had just taken a sip of his coffee, started coughing and stared at her, already awaiting her to tell him that she had been joking.  
She didn't.  
"Okay," Tuomas mumbled and quickly went past her, right into the kitchen.  
'Don't imagine it, don't imagine it ... Oh my god, she's following me ...'  
Tarja was indeed following him and as he put his mug into the sink, she placed herself next to him.  
"That was a joke," she said softly and giggled. "Don't faint."  
"I thought so," Tuomas mumbled, but still the image if Tarja's black vibrator crossed his mind. 'It was no joke.'  
"Still, you better get done. We'll leave in ten minutes."  
"I can get done very fast," Tuomas said and Tarja chuckled.  
"Let's just hope not everywhere," she said with a suggestive wink and Tuomas blushed madly.  
"Well, I don't know ..." he mumbled.  
Tarja just grinned, suddenly getting a little uncomfortable. 'No, he can't be hinting something ...'  
"Let's - let's better drive, hm?" she said and Tuomas nodded before vanishing in the bathroom.  
Tarja sat down, thinking about what he had said.  
He didn't know if he was done fast in bed or not? He had never done it to himself before?  
Tarja shook her head. This was too much for her right now.

Only a few minutes later Tarja started the car and they were on their way to the college.  
"I will let you get out a little before the college okay?" Tarja suggested and decreased the volume of Destruction Preventer from Sonata Arctica a little, so she would be heard. "So no one can see you getting out of my car," she added and Tuomas nodded, fully understanding her dilemma, even though Tarja was a little ashamed.  
In her eyes she treated Tuomas like she was ashamed of him, hoping that he'd understand what would happen if someone would see them together. Everyone would talk about them, rumours would be spread, rumours about them being a couple. And they weren't.  
'Not yet ...' Tarja thought and dared to look at Tuomas for a second, what made her heart race crazily.  
She didn't know if she should make the first step, because what if he didn't like her in that way? This would be totally embarrassing for her, then, after all she was his teacher! A teacher can't kiss a student if the student doesn't have the same feelings towards the teacher. But he had asked her to go out on new year's eve ...  
Okay, not directly, he had won a bet and he had only suggested the date and restaurant they would dine at.  
Tarja stopped a few streets away from their college and Tuomas got out.  
"See you later," he said. "You won't receive a hand kiss now, after all we'll see each other in less than fifteen minutes again."  
"Pity," Tarja said with a flirtatious look and caught Tuomas blushing. Internally she was cheering.  
But suddenly Tuomas got back into the car, pressing a quick kiss on Tarja's cheek.  
Tarja's heart stopped beating for a few seconds and then started beating fast as he smiled at her. "Thanks for everything," he said gently, got out and threw the door close.

He couldn't believe he had done this, he couldn't believe he had really kissed Tarja Turunen's cheek. It had been so spontaneous ...  
Tuomas looked inside the car, since Tarja hadn't started the car again.  
Her eyes were closed and her fingertips were tracing her right cheek, exactly the spot where Tuomas' lips had been.  
That was it. She liked him too. It was obvious.  
Tuomas wanted to jump in the air but instead he started running, happy, but still not able to believe that a woman like her could harbour the same feelings for him as he did for her.  
He put in his earplugs and turned the volume loud, trying not to smile too much.


	22. Chapter 22

"Tuomas, can I talk to you for a moment?"  
Tuomas' eyes met Jule's worried ones, and Tuomas nodded. "Sure, what's up? Do you have problems with your piano part?"  
Jule shook her head and pulled him away from their band, who was walking back into the classroom for the choir practise. "I've been observing Miss Turunen for a while now and it seems ... You know ... Everytime she looks at you, her expression changes ..."  
"How?" Tuomas asked a little dazzled.  
"Well ... As if she'd want something from you ... You know, in a - ehm - romantic way ..."  
"Can't be," Tuomas chuckled, internally though he was cheering. "She doesn't look at me more often than she looks at the others."  
"Maybe," Jule said. "But she definitely looks at you with more interest. I guess you really interest her ..."  
"Jule, no," Tuomas sighed, suddenly eager to make her stop watching them. "Miss Turunen liked our song so much that she asked me to write a song for her."  
"What?" Jule gasped. "And did you ...?"  
"Of course I did," Tuomas chuckled. "You'll hear it tonight."  
"Oh," Jule said, a little blush creeping over her cheeks. "Oh. Well, I was very wrong then. Anyway ... would you like to be my Christmas party date tonight?" she asked a little shyly and Tuomas had to laugh about her cuteness.  
"Sure I want to be your friend date," Tuomas said, emphasizing the word 'friend', hoping she wouldn't see it as a real date.  
"That's great," Jule laughed. "I wasn't sure how you would react ... After the thing with Linn. I know that you're not interested in younger girls ..."  
"Not exactly," Tuomas said slowly. How much did Jule really know?

Tarja saw Tuomas talking to Jule and laughing with her and again another wave of jealousy washed over her.  
How many admirer did he even have?? Linn, Amy ... and now even Jule.  
Her heart clenched as she realised that a girl in his age would fit so much better with him ...  
But suddenly she remebered what he had told her a while ago - Linn was too young for him. So Jule was too, obviously. Oh, and he had told her that he wanted a woman.  
He had told her he wanted a woman!!  
Tarja had to suppress a squeal after she remembered it, now knowing that he had meant her and he still did.  
He wanted her, she could feel it ...  
She walked through the music room and came to stand next to Jule and Tuomas.  
"Is this a private talk or may I join?" she asked and both students got red.  
Tuomas swallowed as his gaze fell into her cleavage, god, why was she so much smaller than him?  
"We've just finished the talk, Miss Turunen," he said and Tarja smiled up to him.  
"Perfect." she purred. "You two can go outside then and practice your choir part."  
Jule and Tuomas moaned.  
For weeks already they had been practising with the choir and it was more tiring than practising with the band.  
"Not a word!" Tarja scolded. "And now out, you two!"  
Jule walked out first, followed by Tuomas and last Tarja.  
Tarja locked the door of the music room and quickly got after them, pulling Tuomas a little back from Jule.  
The young man smiled at her and took her hand, and they were holding it - unnoticed by Jule - until they entered the classroom.

At one the last class was dismissed, since the Christmas party would start at eight and then everyone would be allowed to leave for their holidays.  
Jule had invited Tuomas to her home and Tuomas had accepted the invitation, knowing that everyone would ask questions if he went with Tarja. Before he left, though, he quickly walked up to the teacher's desk.  
"Thank you so much," he said. "For letting me sleep on your couch again."  
"It was a pleasure to have you on my couch", Tarja replied with a deep voice and Tuomas grinned.  
"See you later, then ..."  
Tarja nodded and held her breath as Tuomas kissed her hand again. Secretly she liked it, it made her feel if she was a princess and he was a knight in shining armour ... He had also saved her from a dragon, somehow (Oliver), so it fitted.  
This time though she stood up and embraced him. "See you", she said and brushed her lips against his cheek.  
Tuomas blushed and smiled shyly.  
Sure, he had already kissed her this morning, but now she was kissing him!  
Tuomas left the room and Tarja fell back on her chair. She couldn't stop thinking about everything, just everything.  
Their times together, their piano lessons, their flirts, their songs, their kisses, their exchange of looks ...  
And the fact that he wanted a woman. Wanted her ...  
Tarja got interrupted abruptly as Oliver entered.  
Without a word he crashed her down on the desk and parted her legs.  
"No, Oliver!" Tarja cried. "I ... I have my period!"  
"I don't believe you," Oliver said coldly. "You had your period last week and now hold still."  
He pressed his hand on her mouth and Tarja suddenly realised that the song that Tuomas had written for her, Rivers Of Lust, wasn't only written for her, but indeed also about her ...

"Which insane human would voluntary come to a stupid school's Christmas party after school?" Tuomas raged as Jule and him got into the bus.  
"No one, but sadly it's tradition," Jule sighed. "It's not so bad, though. There's a lot of good things, the food for example and that Miss Turunen sings the whole evening ..."  
"One good thing, huh?" Tuomas chuckled and Jule laughed as well.  
"Oh, yes. It's really not that bad, even though it lasts a while ..."  
"Well, at least I have a charming friend-date by my side." Tuomas smiled at Jule, who smiled back shyly.  
But suddenly Tuomas looked away quickly.  
He was doing at again.  
Exactly this behaviour had made Linn fall for him ... Exactly this behaviour had caused all of this to happen, Linn being sad, him telling her that he was in love with an elder woman ...  
"Tuo?"  
"Sorry, Jule. I just ... I thought of my crush."  
"Aw," Jule said and nudged his upper arm. "You have to tell me more about her."  
Tuomas smiled and described her funny side, her teasing and flirtatious behaviour, her dark hair and her beautiful eyes without mentioning their colours.  
A while later they got out of the bus and walked a while.  
"Are you living alone?" Tuomas asked.  
"No ... I'm not. Not really." Jule giggled a little. "You'll see."  
She lived in a small but nice flat, and she really didn't live alone.  
"That's Willow," she said and lifted up the big, white cat.  
"My god, she's beautiful," Tuomas said and took her, as Jule offered her to him. "I love cats." He caressed the purring cat's little head.  
"So do I," Jule said and took Willow back.  
"This is a nice flat, by the way. Are there more flats free? I need one as well."  
"Hm, I could ask the landlord of my block if you want to."  
"That would be so nice, thank you," Tuomas said with a smile and Jule nodded slowly.  
"Eh ... Sit down, please. Do you want to drink something?"  
"Water would be nice," Tuomas said and while Jule hurried to the kitchen, Tuomas continued caressing Willow.  
"You know," Jule said as she came in again and placed the glass of water on the little couch table. "I didn't want to ask you before because Miss Turunen was in the same room but ... do you - do you like her?"  
"Whom? Miss Turunen?"  
Jule nodded. "If you do, I'm sorry to disappoint you ... I don't think she would start something with students." Jule blushed and she looked at her hands. "I know what I'm talking about."  
"Oh." Tuomas just said as he understood. "Ohhhh!"  
Jule grimaced. "Well, maybe she just wasn't all too fond of the fact that a female student was head over heels into her ..."  
"Oh my God, Jule," Tuomas said and pulled the crushed brunette in a hug. "I'm so sorry ... I didn't know ..."  
"It's okay ... You know that's the reason why I asked you to go out with me ... I wanted her to forget over this embarrassing incident ... If she sees us tonight, she'd stop looking at me with this - this disparaging look. She'd think it was only a misunderstanding ..."  
"What exactly happened?" Tuomas asked Jule, but the girl shook her head.  
"It's embarrassing. I can't talk about it ... But to speak of it again, I thought you could ... You know, maybe kiss me when she's looking ..."  
Tuomas pressed his lips together. He had planned to kiss Tarja tonight ...  
"You don't have to," Jule mumbled and looked away, her cheeks red.  
"No, no. It's okay. You know, I can't kiss you because I have an almost-girlfriend. But we'll find a solution to make her forget, okay? I'm your friend and I'll help you."  
Jule beamed at him.

At half past seven they drove back to the school again. The whole afternoon they had played piano, practised their song for the music festival, and Tuomas had seized the moment to find out a little more about his beloved (and boy, Jule knew much). Tarja had studied at the Sibelius, which had surprised him, then she had started teaching there, before she had met Oliver Jokinen. The handsome teacher had somehow convinced her to teach at her current college. And officially she had always been a mean teacher.  
While they were driving back, they came to stand next to a jewellery store once, because a traffic light showed red. Tuomas' gaze fell into the shop window.  
And he froze.  
He spotted the most beautiful necklace he had ever seen.  
The chain was delicate and silver and there was a small, silver clef dangling from it ...  
It was just perfect for his beloved.  
"Oh my God, Jule," Tuomas said. "I just remembered that I have to buy something for my sister's Christmas present", he lied and Jule looked at him.  
"Well, then let's get out," she said. "I could help you look for one," she then offered, but Tuomas shook his head.  
"That's nice of you but it's not necessary," he said politely. "I know exactly what she wants. Wait for me at the entrance, I'll take the next bus."  
Jule didn't look happy, but she nodded. "Okay, see you then," she said as the bus drove on and Tuomas pressed the red button, getting out at the next bus stop.  
"Bye", he called and went back to the jewellery store.  
He came out only a few minutes later, sweating lightly. The necklace had costed him forty Euros ... But it was so worth it. He now was holding a small package in his careful hands. The middle aged shop assistant had wrapped it for him in red satin paper and now it looked lovely.  
"For my girlfriend," he had said as she had wrapped it. "Do you think she could like it?"  
"Oh, honey, your girlfriend will adore it!" the assistant had purred an winked at him. "I would."  
Tuomas shivered lightly - why did every woman in Helsinki seem to like him so much? If Tarja only would make it as obvious as the shop assistant had done it ...  
He carefully put the package somewhere safe inside his schoolbag after he had entered the bus, and as he reached the school he first went to his locker to put the whole bag inside.  
And there Jule was waiting for him.  
"Did you find something for your sister?" she asked smiling and Tuomas showed her the package. "It's already wrapped, but it's a small silver wolf. Susanna loves wolves."  
"Oh, how cute. Is it a necklace?"  
"No," Tuomas lied on. "It's a key chain."  
"You're such a nice brother," Jule said and Tuomas laughed.  
"Well, Sussu is a nice sister."  
They linked their arms and went inside the aula, which was already quite full.  
"The ceremony doesn't last long. Only about twenty minutes, and then we are allowed to eat as much as we want to. Meanwhile Miss Turunen will sing different Ave Marias, Silent Night, and so on."  
"Poor her," Tuomas said and Jule laughed.  
"Poor her!? Tuo, she gets extra money for this, and the fact that she doesn't get something from the food, means she won't get fat. Besides that, she enjoys singing and this way punch us into our faces that we're as untalented as one could be."  
Tuomas laughed as well, but both of them got quiet as Val and Amy came to stand next to them.  
"Have you seen Linn?" Val (who was already eating a piece of chocolate cake) asked.  
"No," Jule said a little surprised. "Isn't she with you two?"  
"Well, do you see her anywhere?" Amy asked and Jule rolled her eyes.  
She said something, but Tuomas couldn't concentrate on them anymore.  
Because this very moment he had seen an angel.  
His mouth went open as the angel moved over the stage, telling some men where to put the piano. Then she put the songbook she was carrying on a music stand and fumbled with the microphone next to it.  
Her black hair was in a bun and she was wearing a long, white dress ... As an angel. The dress itself had long sleeves that went also over her thumb and index finger. On her chest it was black and probably silky (it shimmered a little in the light) and the coat she was wearing over it had no sleeves but a big collar. The coat also reached until the floor and Tuomas catched himself wondering about how she would look without the coat and if her curves would be fully visible, due to the tight dress ...  
And as the lights went off and the angel started to sing, Tuomas thought he had died and gone to heaven.


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 'Nuff waited, my dearest! You were patient and now I hope this chapter will be for your satisfaction. Kiitos for voting, commenting (don't stop please!) and sticking for the last long chapters. Have fun!!  
> Oh, and please read my new one shot, Nothing Else Matters :)

\---

The ceremony hadn't lasted long, just as Jule had promised, and while the girls were storming the buffet, Tuomas did everything to have a look at the beautiful woman on the stage.  
She was very professional, she didn't seem to care that not everyone (almost no one ...) listened to her. Tuomas could spot ear plugs as him and Jule went closer - very professional.  
She was singing Silent Night in different languages, currently in German.  
"Her German is so cute," Jule giggled and Tuomas smiled.  
"Her English is not the best, though," he chuckled. Not as if he'd care, he loved her, why would he care about her English? She was an angel, she didn't need English ...  
All the time he hoped that Tarja would spot him and give him a sign, but if she had already spotted him, she hadn't even blushed a bit. Very professional ...  
She sounded so much better in a big hall and a microphone. Of course she always sounded good, also if they were just in Tarja's bedroom ... Maybe because Tarja always had sung a little more quiet when they were alone, more quiet and softer ... As if she had been shy.  
And also she hadn't sounded like that as Tuomas had asked her to sing at his first day of school.  
Tuomas couldn't say a word as she was singing, he barely could breathe. Somehow he could only see and hear Tarja on the stage, he didn't even notice Jule's look upon him.  
She was too perfect to be real.  
Due to the fact that almost no one really listened, everyone applauded madly every time she ended a song. And she really seemed to bathe in the applause ...  
"I decided that this song will be the last one for tonight," she said into the microphone and Tuomas noticed that she was a little out of breath.  
Some "awww"s went through the crowd, but Tarja only huffed.  
"Hey! I also deserve to have a nice Christmas party, you selfish little egoists!" she shouted and Tuomas chuckled.  
This was his Tarja.  
His Tarja on the stage laughed heartily as everyone frowned at her. "You should see your faces. Anyway, this song is something special for me ... Someone wrote it for me."  
Tuomas could feel Jule's elbow on his upper arm, but he ignored it.  
"A man who's very important to me ..." she said with a soft smile and whispers went through the crowd. "Yes, very important, you nosy kids!" Tarja said with a dirty laugh and Tuomas felt that his face was glowing. Jule had stopped nudging him and he could swear that her mouth was hanging open now.  
Oh no ... Why had he told her?  
Tarja sat down in front of the piano and after letting out a small breath she started playing.  
"Wow!" Jule breathed. "Is that your song, Tuomas ...?"  
Tuomas thanked God that Jule had asked him, this was probably his rescue.  
"Sadly not, but it's beautiful ..."  
"Oh yes but pity she doesn't play yours," Jule answered and patted his arm.  
But before Tuomas could answer, Tarja had started singing.  
"Violent hands come at midnight, hold me down ... I can't make a sound. In their arms, still unwanted, crave the child, be forever wiled ..."

As she ended the song, Tuomas had tears in his eyes. He quickly wiped them away and joined the deafening applause.  
"Hope you liked it!" Tarja shouted and took a bow after the other. "Thank you! Thank you so much! And good night!"  
Tuomas got a shock as she left the stage and - instead of walking to the buffet or her colleagues or anywhere else - walked right out of the hall and outside into the coldness.  
"I will ask her why she didn't sing my song," Tuomas informed Jule and rushed after Tarja without waiting for an answer.  
"Tarja! Wait!" he called as soon as he got outside and saw the angel vanish in the shining snow. "Tarja!"  
The angel turned around and started running with a giggle when she saw him.  
"Tarja!" Tuomas called again, a little angry this time as he sprinted after her. Tarja ran towards the big oak in the school's garden and hid behind it. "Don't run away," Tuomas mumbled and got around the oak, grabbing her shoulders. "I've got you!"  
"Yes, you've got me," Tarja whispered, her eyes glowing in the lights of sunset.  
Tuomas swallowed. "Tarja ... You were amazing," he whispered and Tarja blushed. Tuomas grinned and added, "So ... I'm important to you?"  
"Very," Tarja answered with a shy smile and Tuomas' hands slowly went down her arms.  
"So are you for me," he mumbled and put his hands on her waist, pulling her close.  
Tarja didn't say a word, but her eyes and her smile begged for him to kiss her. Tuomas smiled at her and Tarja replied to the smile, her cheeks light pink. "So beautiful ..." he mumbled and bent down, closing his eyes already and so did she - but before his lips could touch hers, he heard something disturbing.  
"Honestly?" he groaned and pulled away. "They're honestly playing Last Christmas now?? This isn't even a Christmas song!"  
"True, it's a love song," Tarja said and then laughed. "Don't be angry, Tuomas, not everyone can know everything about music, as you and I do."  
You and I.  
Tuomas smiled at her again, but just couldn't bring himself to kiss her while Last Christmas was playing in the background.  
"Mhh," Tarja mumbled. Obviously she thought the same. "Wanna dance?"  
Tuomas laughed loudly. "I can't dance."  
"Great!" Tarja said with a beam. "I also can't. Let's do it. Dancing, I mean." This time she didn't blush but wink, and Tuomas wondered if she maybe really wanted to 'do it' with him ...  
But Tarja had already taken his hand and Tuomas put his other hand on her waist.  
What they were doing, couldn't be called dancing. They hopped through the garden, silly and definitely not right, but none of them cared. They laughed while they jumped through the garden, and thanked God loudly as the horrible song, in their opinion, finally stopped.  
"What now, All I want for Christmas is you?" Tuomas guessed and Tarja laughed softly.  
"How fitting this would be," she said lowly and took Tuomas' hand.  
"Indeed," he said and smiled at her.  
For a second try he bent down to her, but then the next song, a slower one, started.  
"Why can't they just let it be?" Tuomas mumbled, but closed his eyes as Tarja embraced him.  
"Dance with me once more," she whispered into his ear and Tuomas wrapped his arms around her slim body beneath her coat, putting his hands on her lower back.  
It was a very slow song, Tuomas didn't know it, and the two were swaying through the snow covered garden slowly, their eyes closed.  
Tarja could feel his steady breath close to her ear and when she started moving her hands over his arms, he started to caress her waist gently.  
"Are you feeling cold?" he whispered and Tarja pulled away to look at him.  
"No ... are you?"  
Tuomas shook his head and Tarja laid her head down on his chest. She could feel his heartbeat against her temple and his hands moving over her back gently.  
This was perfect.  
Tarja had never experienced something so romantic, and it got even more romantic when she looked up to him and caught him looking down at her.  
"Like what you see?" she whispered and Tuomas nodded.  
"Very." Tuomas whispered. "To be honest I've never seen something so beautiful as you are ..."  
And with those words he finally locked their lips.

His lips gently on hers, her lips gently responding to the innocent, yet loving kiss. Their lips moving with each other without deepening it.  
The kiss lasted for minutes, hours, days - it lasted forever, so it seemed.  
None of them wanted to stop, but as the song stopped, they automatically pulled apart, slowly, not wanting to stop. Their lips were only a few inches apart and Tuomas could feel the warmth of his teacher's breath on his lips.   
Tarja still had her eyes closed, a small smile playing on her lips. She sighed quietly and Tuomas hugged her again.  
"That was ..." he whispered.  
"Wonderful?" Tarja asked shyly and Tuomas nodded.  
"And perfect ... I hope it was okay for you ..."  
"Okay?" Tarja whispered and reached up to cup his face. "It was more than okay, Tuomas ... I've longed for that for quite a time already ..."  
"Really?" Tuomas asked. "I mean, I hoped so, but you really did?"  
As an answer, Tarja closed the gap between them again, claiming his lips once more.  
Their second kiss was short, only a small but gentle, longer lasting peck.  
"I've dreamt about it," Tarja then mumbled. "At night ... During daytime ... Always."  
"Aw," Tuomas chuckled and pulled her close. "I've been dreaming about kissing you since the second I've laid my eyes on your stunning beauty. You took my breath away from the very beginning and I still can't believe that a beatiful woman as you could be interested in me ..."  
Tarja blushed. Again. Again he had said something so utterly romantic that her heart started racing.  
She wanted to say something, as a shiver went down her spine and she shuddered.  
"Let's go inside," Tuomas said gently and they walked back to the school, arms wrapped around each other.  
They entered the school through the main entrance, and Tuomas pulled her towards his locker.  
"What are you doing?" Tarja whispered, looking left and right, worried that someone could see them.  
"I'm just getting my schoolbag and then let's drive home," Tuomas answered and Tarja giggled.  
"Home? You mean let's drive to my home."  
"Yes, I meant that," Tuomas said and opened his locker, pulling out his schoolbag. "And ... and I have something for you ..."  
"What?" Tarja asked nosily. "What??"  
"In the car, okay?" Tuomas said and Tarja grabbed his hand.  
"Then let's go."  
They walked to Tarja's black Ford, slowly with their fingers entwined.  
Tuomas had totally forgotten about Jule, the fact that he had finally kissed Tarja Turunen had played with his mind completely.  
They got into the car and Tarja pulled Tuomas close, stealing another kiss from him. "I can't get enough of this", she said gently and Tuomas grinned.  
"Neither do I ..." 'And once we made love, will we say the same then?' he added in his thoughts. 'I hope so ...'  
"So, you wanted to give something to me?" Tarja wiggled her eyebrows and Tuomas laughed.  
"Not that, you dirty minded woman ..."  
Tarja let out a dirty laugh and Tuomas pulled out the little parcel. "Merry Christmas," he mumbled and Tarja gasped.  
"Oh no ... I don't have anything for you, Tuomas ..."  
"Well, you kissed me back, that was enough of a present for me, " Tuomas said shyly and Tarja took the gift from him with shaking hands.  
"You're so sweet," she whispered and unwrapped the parcel gently.  
"It's nothing special," Tuomas mumbled and blushed. "Just something that made me think of you ..."  
Tarja pulled out the clef and stared at it for a while. Then she looked at Tuomas. "Is that from the Koivuni jewellery store?"  
"I don't know, maybe," Tuomas said. "Why?"  
"Because I've seen that necklace in their shop window a while ago and didn't buy it because it was too expensive for a simple necklace."  
Tuomas didn't answer first and then he whispered, "Don't you like it?"  
"Oh, Tuomas," Tarja sighed and hugged him. "I love it, but you shouldn't have bought it for me. I don't want you to buy such expensive things for me."  
Tuomas didn't say anything, he just closed his eyes. "I - I can give it back ..." he then mumbled with a hurt expression in his face.  
"No, it was a present and I'll keep it", Tarja said and pulled away again. "But don't do this again ... You don't have to buy things for me. Okay? I like you without you doing this ..."  
"Okay," Tuomas said softly ('I like you', she had said!) and then Tarja turned her back to him, sliding off her coat. "Could you put it on me?"  
Tuomas opened the chain of the necklace and put it on his beloved, his fingers gently stroking back the loose strands from her bun, touching her neck, caressing her perfect, white skin.  
She turned around again as the necklace was on her and Tuomas smiled. "You're so beautiful."  
"Thank you," Tarja said softly and took his hand, before she started the car and drove him to her place.

"Do you want to sleep here again?" Tarja asked after she stepped out of the bathroom, wearing this stunning nightgown again.  
And she was still wearing the clef, it was laying on the top of her cleavage as on a soft pillow.  
"If I'm allowed to?" Tuomas asked and Tarja nodded.  
"Sure. Do you ..." She blushed madly. "Forget it."  
Tuomas stepped up to her and put his hand on her waist. "Do I ...?"  
"Want to sleep in my bed ... Next to me ..." Tarja mumbled and avoided his look.  
Tuomas swallowed. "Is that a joke ...?"  
"Not really," Tarja mumbled. "But if you don't want to, it is one ..."  
Tuomas laughed, relieved. "Tarja ... I do so want to sleep in your bed - if I'm allowed to."  
Tarja grabbed his hand and pulled him into her bedroom instead of answering.  
"I only have one blanket, though," Tarja informed him, not sounding as if she was sorry about the fact.  
Tuomas was very aware of this, so he stayed in his boxers and a shirt he had worn the day before.  
Tarja turned around and Tuomas didn't think twice, he brought his arm around her, spooning her.  
Tarja turned her head to look at him as good as possible and smiled. "Merry early Christmas," she whispered and Tuomas pecked her lips gently.


	24. Chapter 24

She was beautiful.  
Her eyes were shining, her hair was tousled. She didn't wear make up, but she looked stunning. She smiled at him, only at him.  
"Good morning," she whispered and pushed a strand of his long hair behind his ear, smiling even more. "Did you sleep well?"  
"I slept perfectly well, how couldn't I with an angel in my arms?"  
"Charmer," Tarja whispered and now touched the little clef on her necklace. "Oh, good. It's still there."  
Tuomas smiled. "It suits you."  
"I wonder why," Tarja giggled and pulled Tuomas close, frowning. "Tuomas ... We have to talk ..."  
"Oh no ..." Tuomas mumbled, but Tarja slung her arms around him.  
"I don't want to end what ... what we have, don't worry," she said gently and pecked his lips. "I couldn't end that only after a day it has started. No, I only want to warn you, this relationship will be really unhealthy. We can never officially go out, we will have to restrain ourselves at the university -"  
"Relationship?" Tuomas answered. "Do you ... Do you want to ... date me?"  
Tarja smiled gently. "Well, let's say it's worth a try ..."  
"Oh my God," Tuomas mumbled and fell back into the pillow with closed eyes. "I can't believe it ... She really wants to date me ..."  
Tarja giggled, not knowing what was going on inside of him.  
'I'm dating her,' he thought. 'Well, not yet, but soon. I can kiss her as often as I want to. I can finally touch her. I can make love to her sooner or later ... She will be my first. My first Love will be my first time. And she'll be mine. Tarja Turunen, my teacher, my one and only, will be only mine ...'  
"Ehm - Tuomas?"  
Her gentle voice brought him back to reality and as he looked at her again, she was looking at him worried. "Don't you want to date me ...? I mean, I'd understand ... After all I'm ten years older." She grimaced sadly.  
"Nine and a half," Tuomas corrected. "And I'd be stupid if I didn't want to date you ... Did you never acknowledge my flirts with you? My compliments about you?"  
Tarja smiled again and Tuomas just had to add, "And you look so, so beautiful today ..."  
"You're too kind," Tarja said and pulled him close again. "I wish we could spend the day in bed ..."  
"Eh - but that'd be a little early ..." Tuomas mumbled shyly and Tarja captured his lips in a small and gentle kiss.  
"I'm not thinking of robbing your innocence so early," she whispered but didn't let him answer by locking their lips in a loving kiss.  
Her hands roamed trough his hair, her lips upon his, massaging his, her foot caressed his flank, her breasts rubbed against his chest and her hips also moved gently against him while she gave everything into the kiss.  
Tuomas didn't know what to do, she was a perfect kisser. First of all that, and then the fact that her soft breasts rubbed against him was driving him crazy.  
He opened his mouth and moaned, Tarja seizing the moment to add her tongue to the kiss.  
And when their tongues touched for a second, Tuomas had to push her away. "Tarja, I'm so ... I have to go to - the toilet ..."  
Tarja didn't say something, she only looked at him, fully understanding (she was so sensible).  
Then she smiled and brought her hands in front of her face.  
"Go, I won't peek."  
Tuomas smiled at her thankfully and Tarja hid beneath the blanket, while Tuomas quickly went to the bathroom to get rid of his erection - again.  
And again he sneaked around the bathroom, looking for something specific - the condoms.  
He found them behind a box of things she needed to do her hair (hairspray, heat protection, flatting iron and more). Nosily he opened the pack of condoms and his mouth went open as he counted five. Same as the last time he had looked.  
'So she's not active anymore ... Because of me. My god, I can't believe it ... She stopped having sex after I had this talk with her - to wait for me maybe? Good God ...'  
He put the pack back, trying not to think about if they would fit him or not (he wasn't something special concerning his size, it was average).  
Tuomas wondered if Tarja would like his size, he hoped that she wouldn't start laughing or something else. He was afraid that Tarja would compare him to her former sex partners and tell him he was too small ...  
Tuomas shook his head and closed the mirror again, before walking back to the bedroom.  
"Tarja, I -" He froze when he saw that she was gone, but smiled when two slim arms were wrapped around his body from behind.  
"Yes?" Tarja whispered against his back, Tuomas could feel that she was pressing the side of her face against it.  
"I wanted to tell you how glad I am about what - what happened yestderday," he said shyly and Tarja started caressing his stomach and chest.  
"Our kiss?" she asked.  
"Yes. I've never thought you could like me that way ..." Tuomas closed his eyes and cursed himself as Tarja let go of him, but then she crossed him and pulled down his face.  
"Don't underestimate yourself," she said gently. "Why wouldn't I? You're a wonderful human being, I really like spending time with you. You're sweet and you're cute and you're so gorgeous ..." Tuomas blushed and Tarja giggled. "You're so talented and smart and - and beautiful," Tarja whispered and pecked his lips. "I've been fascinated by you since the day you came here. You're different, true - and I like that."  
Tuomas smiled down at him and Tarja stared back to him, which made him think of that she wanted to hear the same.  
"Oh Tarja," he said lowly and cupped her face. "I've been fascinated by your astounding beauty from the very beginning, and even though at first I was totally daunted by the way you acted, I immediately realised that it's your seeking for love that made you act the way you did. If you allow me to give you the love you need, I'll gladly be the man to fulfill your wishes. You are and you'll ever be my angel and my queen, my light at the end of a long, dark tunnel, the sun that lights my path."  
Tarja stared at him as he had ended. "Wow," she whispered and then buried her face in his shirt. "Wow, Tuomas, wow ... That was beautiful ..." 'Almost like a love declaration ...' "Where do you take that cheesy but beautiful things from?"  
"If I feel something, I just let my feelings flow," Tuomas admitted. "And sometimes my feelings sound like poems as soon as they come out ..."  
"You know, I like it," Tarja said gently and locked their lips again.

"That's it."  
Tuomas let his fork fall in shock as his mother screamed at him.  
"What?!" he asked, flabbergasted.  
"You're smiling like a fool all the time and as soon as I ask you what's up with you, you say that nothing happened. But you're thinking of something, I can see that!" Kirsti breathed for air. "Why are you smiling? If it's something private, just tell us ..."  
His parents were staring at him, Pentti with raised eyebrows, Kirsti with a pleading look.  
"Sorry, it is very private," Tuomas replied with an apologric look and his parents continued eating.  
No one said a word and Tuomas could sense that his parents weren't all to happy with his secretiveness. But what could he say?  
'I have a girlfriend now - well, woman-friend. She's thirty years old and my teacher. Oh God.'  
Tuomas almost hyperventilated when he thought of Tarja as his girlfriend.  
When he thought of talking a long walk through Kitee with her, their arms linked. They sat down on a bench, looked at each other and kissed gently.  
"I love you", Tuomas whispered and after a sweet smile, Tarja replied.  
"I love you too."  
"Tuomas?"  
"Hm?"  
Tuomas looked at his mother, who was looking at him worried. "You weren't moving - is everything okay?"  
"I just thought of something," Tuomas said and stood up. "I'm not hungry anymore ..."  
The young man brought his plate to the kitchen, while his parents looked after him.  
"He's so difficult," Kirsti sighed and Pentti shook his head.  
"Third children are always the worst," he said and Kirsti sighed again.  
"First he went through this hard time and now he's ... Just absent. Always absent ..."  
"He should get himself a girlfriend," Pentti said. "I guess he only needs a woman."  
"That, and then we can get rid of him when he moves in with her," Kirsti laughed and Tuomas rolled his eyes.  
He got upstairs quietly, he didn't want to hear more of their conversation.  
In his room he quickly opened his notebook.  
There was a page where he had written Tarja's name for fifty or more times and after that page he started writing something else.  
Tarja. You're my Love.  
Tarja. You're my life.  
Tarja. You're my queen.  
Tarja. You're my goddess.  
Tarja. You're my world.  
Tarja. You're my everything.  
Tarja. I love you.  
He quickly shut the book as a knock at the door startled him, and he quickly hid the little book beneath his maths book, pretending as if he would study.  
His mother came inside and saw that her son was studying for school.  
"Do you have a test?" she asked and Tuomas nodded.  
"On Thursday, but it's maths, so ..." Tuomas rolled his eyes and Kirsti stepped closer.  
"I'm sorry for being so nosy before," she apologised and Tuomas shook his head. "It's okay, after all I stayed for two nights."  
"Yes you did, and you never told me where," Kirsti said and sat down on his bed. "Listen, you're almost twenty-one, if you have a girlfriend just tell me. I won't start scolding you because you're too young for sleeping with a girl."  
"We haven't slept with each other yet," Tuomas said without looking up from his maths book. His face was glowing.  
"So you ... You have a girlfriend?" Tuomas could hear the excitement in his mother's voice.  
"Well ... I think I do. We - we kissed for the first time yesterday ..."  
Kirsti let out a squeal and jumped up from her son's bed. She rushed over to him and hugged him. "You kissed?! For the first time?! Oh my god ...!"  
"Yes, so please don't think too much about it yet", Tuomas begged. "I'll meet her in the holidays again and well ..."  
"Who is it?" Kirsti asked. "Do I know her or is she a new girl?"  
Tuomas stared at the floor. "You know her," he admitted.  
"Will you tell me or should I guess?" Kirsti said dryly. "Well, if you let me guess, I'd say it's T."  
Kirsti squealed again as Tuomas only nodded, his face deep red.  
"It is T," he whispered and Kirsti started jumping.  
"Did you already tell her that you love her?? Oh my God, I'm so excited. Now you have to tell me her name!"  
But Tuomas shook his head. "No, she doesn't know I love her. And I also won't tell her name, you'll meet her sooner or later."  
Kirsti groaned and sat down on the bed again.  
'Patience,' she told herself. 'They kissed for the first time yesterday, sooner or later he'll tell you more.' "Will you go out tonight?"  
Tuomas shrugged. "I guess I will. Emppu and Kaisa ask me out for ages already. They say there's a pretty good band at the rock station tonight, way better than ours is. We'll check them out, after our break we'll be fully back."  
Kirsti nodded. "I miss your band, to be honest. Your music wasn't bad at all."  
"Yeah, but now I'm studying, thanks to you, and Kaisa is all busy with her engagement ..." Tuomas sighed. "And Jukka still mourns because of his father. Of course he has the right to, but slowly it gets a little annoying. It's been months since he left."  
"Understand," Kisti scolded her son. "His father left without a word because of another woman. Don't expect him to be happy again soon."  
"Yes, but not even Satu is able to cheer him up ..." Tuomas sighed and shut his book. "I'll call Emppu."


	25. Chapter 25

The Kiteen rock station was built from leftovers of a closed underground station. From that the name did come from, rock station.  
The escalators didn't work anymore, which was probably good. A lot of accidents had already happened down there because of drunk people who hadn't paid attention, and everyone knew that the steady moving of escalators wouldn't have decreased the rate of accidents.  
Tuomas greeted the doormen and so did Emppu, his sister and her fiancé as they walked in. They knew them already, Nightwish was playing on stage every now and then. Well, had been playing, before both Jukka and Tuomas and later Kaisa (and this way also Emppu) had taken a break.  
They walked down and saw that the band was already playing. They played hard rock and they were good - better than his band, which mostly played symphonic metal - no doubt.  
"They're pretty good," Kaisa now called to him and Tuomas nodded.  
"But they have no female vocalist, so we're the better band!" he called back and Kaisa, who always loved to get a compliment for her singing, nodded with a laugh.  
Tuomas got a few drinks for his band and the vocalist's fiancé and soon they were sitting on one of the benches and having fun as always.  
But Tuomas missed something madly, or let's say someone.  
While Kaisa and Paul were kissing every now and then, his heart was clenching madly.  
He thought back of Tarja's soft lips against his, thought of her beautiful hands in his hair, about her almost naked body pressed against his.  
He wished she was here, here with him. He wished she was holding his hand, pulling him close, kissing him with all her passion - but he knew that, even if she was here, he wouldn't be able to kiss her. If someone knew her, the relationship would be over before it had even started. Tarja had said they had to stay secret, which meant they couldn't even see each other when people were around.  
Tuomas stared at his black nails.  
He had done it again, his eyes were framed with black eyeliner and his nails were black as well.  
He didn't get why women were allowed to wear make up and man weren't, they were called gay when they did.  
Tuomas had learnt not to listen to it, and gladly in the rock station no one called him gay. That was why he loved he rock station, he was cool here. He was liked.  
"Hey, Tuo," Emppu suddenly elbowed him and pointed at a brunette girl at the bar. "Doesn't she look nice?"  
"Emppu, I'll never start something with a stranger again," he sighed and Emppu rolled his eyes.  
"But she really looks nice! She wears glasses, maybe she's just a nerd as you are. Maybe she's your true love, who knows?"  
"She can't be," Tuomas sighed.  
Emppu raised his brows at him. "Why can't she?"  
"Because -" Tuomas started and let his eyes wander, thinking of a reason why.  
Until his eyes came to stand on the reason herself, the reason of why the brunette girl with glasses wasn't his true love, because this woman was, the woman who was walking down one of the escalators, looking around. Obviously looking for someone.  
"Because?" Emppu asked.  
"Be - because - because," Tuomas stumbled, his face deep red. "Emppu, I'm sorry I didn't tell you, but I fell in love."  
"You did what?!" Emppu shouted and Tuomas teared his eyes away from the beautiful teacher.  
Kaisa and Paul were staring at them and Tuomas groaned. "Emppu!"  
"Oh my God! Tell us, Tuo!" Emppu started hitting Tuomas on his upper arm.  
"Ouch - okay! I'll tell you!" Tuomas yelled and Emppu stopped hitting him.  
"I'm waiting."  
Tuomas looked at his friends and stared at his nails again. "I - I might have a girlfriend," he then said and Kaisa gasped.  
"Really??"  
Tuomas nodded. "We're not officially together yet but we're close to ... I like her - very much."  
His cheeks reddened even more and his friends smiled at him.  
"Aww," Kaisa said. "Look, Paul, that's the way you talked about me two years ago."  
Paul laughed and threw a dirty look at his fiancée. "I never looked like a fool as he does, though," he replied and Tuomas rolled his eyes.  
He would never forget that Paul had been one of those who had made his life a living hell by calling him gay.  
He looked back at his favourite teacher, who was now standing at the bar. She looked a little desperate, did she look for him maybe?  
She was wearing a gray leather jacket and black, very tight thighs. Oh, and the usual high heeled boots.  
"She is hot," Emppu suddenly said and put a hand on his heart. "My god, I've just seen an angel."  
"Hm?" Tuomas looked around and saw that a blonde girl had gotten pulled on the stage by the guitarist and now was headbanging madly. From what Tuomas could spot, she was really beautiful.  
"Yes. Yes, she's pretty. Sadly this guitarist already has seen her before you."  
"What?" Emppu looked at him confused. "Dude, you look into the completely wrong direction. There - that black haired. At the bar."  
Tuomas' heart stood still for a moment. "That old woman?" he tried helplessly and Emppu laughed loudly.  
"Old woman? She's hardly twenty-five, if even!"  
"You're kidding, right?" Tuomas said. "Emppu, she's thirty."  
"You think?" Emppu wiggled his brows. "If she is, she'll be very experienced in bed."  
'Oh yes,' Tuomas thought and answered, "I know she's thirty because I know her."  
"Oh," Emppu said and thought a while before he added, "A friend of your sister?"  
Tuomas shook his head. "My -" 'girlfriend' "teacher."  
"Your teacher??" Emppu asked with wide open eyes. "Wow. You have such a hot teacher?"  
"She's hot, but she's the devil," Tuomas grinned.  
"Oh God, she really must be good in bed," Emppu said and jumped up. "Why is she here?"  
"Maybe she's from Kitee, I don't know," Tuomas said and Emppu peeled off his jacket.  
"I'll talk to her," he informed Tuomas.  
And Tuomas watched his best friend walk right into his undoing.  
"Where is Erno going?" Kaisa asked and feared herself away from Paul.  
"See that black haired woman?" he asked and the others nodded. Tuomas laughed. "She's my teacher. And Emppu decided to talk to her."  
"Oh God," Kaisa said and Paul nodded.  
"She'll eat him."  
"In one piece and without salt," Tuomas laughed and the three took a sip of their drinks, watching the small blonde approach the tall goddess.

The tall goddess herself could barely believe what she saw, a small blonde guy approaching her with wiggling eyebrows.  
She laughed and somehow the boy seemed to understand it wrong, since his face lit up.  
"Hello, beautiful lady," he purred and came to stand next to her.  
"Are you looking for your Mommy?" Tarja immediately replied and Emppu was caught in his answer.  
That he hadn't expected.  
"No, I just wanted to buy a drink," he said startled and Tarja smiled down to him.  
"I'm not nursing, sorry."  
This time Emppu immediately flirted back. "Pity," he said and wiggled his eyebrows.  
Tarja stared at him. "Ew." she then said and looked away.  
"You're not nice," Emppu said and watched her lips curl.   
"I guess I'm not," she said. "What do you want here, boy? I'm here with someone."  
"Oh, I'm sorry," Emppu spat. "The great teacher is thinking she's something better."  
Tarja didn't even look shocked. "Oh, do I have you in ME?" she asked dryly and took a sip of her coke.  
"No, but my best friend Tuomas over there," Emppu said and Tarja started coughing.  
She looked into the direction in which the blonde was pointing and she met his eyes.  
His blue, black framed eyes.  
He looked quite shocked.  
"He wears make up," Tarja said, ignoring the feeling that rose inside her.  
She liked it, she felt that she liked the fact that he was wearing eyeliner. He looked hot.  
"He's a wannabe rock star. We all are," Emppu said and Tarja smiled at Tuomas, who smiled back shyly.  
"Oh, really, I wouldn't have thought that," Tarja replied sarcastically. "Send him over, I want to give him some make up advice."  
Emppu laughed and went back to his best friend.  
"Wow, she didn't eat you," Kaisa said and Emppu poked his sister.  
"Tuo, she wants to give you some make up advice," he only said and Paul bursted into laughter.  
"That's mean," Kaisa said, but Tuomas saw how close she was to laughing as well.  
But Tuomas smiled as he rose from the bench.  
Tarja wanted to talk to him. She had only come because of him!  
"See you," Tuomas said dryly and walked over to Tarja, who was smiling at him broadly.  
Tuomas smiled back gently, his heart racing madly.  
She was so, so beautiful. And she was his. He had done it, she was all his.  
"Hi," he said and placed himself next to his beautiful teacher/almost girlfriend.  
"Hi, Tuomas," Tarja replied gently. "You never told me your best friend is a hobbit."  
Tuomas laughed. "I bet you totally pulled his leg?"  
"The poor boy almost cried," Tarja said with a frown and then laughed. "I asked him if he was looking for his Mommy and when he told me he wanted to buy a drink, I said I wasn't nursing."  
"Oh", Tuomas said and laughed loudly. "He already heard much worse. Hey, why are you here?"  
"I hoped to find you," Tarja said. "And I did."  
"Yes, but we can't leave now," Tuomas said. "My friends ... They couldn't keep a secret ..."  
"I understand," Tarja said softly and looked up to the stage. "And if I leave now and wait in front of your house?"  
"Yes, that could work," Tuomas said while his heart started racing. "I'll see that I'll arrive at home at midnight, alright?"  
"Fine," Tarja sighed. "It's a long time from now but I'll wait for you."  
"Okay," Tuomas said gently. "Can't wait."  
Tarja smiled as well but without looking at him. She knew his friends were observing them.  
She had to hold herself back from jumping at him and kissing him deeply.  
"Nice make up," she said with a grin and Tuomas blushed.  
"It looks bad," he mumbled, but Tarja shook her head.  
"It looks hot," she breathed. "Very."  
"Hot?" Tuomas asked stunned and Tarja nodded.  
"It's hard to explain but it suits you ... You look sexy."  
Tuomas smiled again. "See you later", he said gently and Tarja grinned again.  
"Until then, Mister Hotness."  
Tuomas touched an imagined hat. "Miss Beautiful," he replied and walked back to his friends, while Tarja left the rock station quickly, her heart fluttering.  
She wasn't Miss Bitchy anymore, now she was Miss Beautiful ...

Tuomas slowly went back to his friends and had the sudden urge to run back to his woman when he saw their grins.  
"You flirted!" Emppu shouted and Tuomas shook his head.  
"We talked about school," he said and the others rolled her eyes.  
"Why did she leave?" Kaisa asked.  
"She has a date," Tuomas replied without thinking. "She thought he was already here but he wasn't, so she decided to wait at the bus stop."  
"And what did she say about your make up?" Emppu asked and Tuomas laughed.  
"That I look like a rock star," he lied and the others laughed - except of Paul.  
"I thought you talked about school?" he asked and Tuomas swallowed.  
"Yeah ... We talked about school and the other stuff."  
No one replied but Tuomas could see that they didn't completely believe him, in front of all Paul didn't.

Tuomas left at quarter to midnight. He had knocked back a few more shots since he had seen Tarja, in his opinion it helped him to get calm.  
He left his clique with the lie that he had a lot to study for and left the station, tumbling over the escalator, almost falling down.  
The ice cold air hit him and he swallowed.  
"Where do I live again?" he mumbled and giggled as he remembered that Tarja was waiting for him. "Oh Tarjaaa, my goddess," he groaned. "Oh how I wish to bang you into every cardinal direction ... No, make love. Make love to you properly. Like you deserve it." He giggled again. "Damn," he groaned. "Too much alcohol."  
"Indeed," a voice behind him chuckled and Tuomas groaned.  
"No, Mum, leave me alone -"  
But as the car came to stand next to him and he spotted Tarja's amused face, he went quiet.  
"Get inside, son," she said in a played strict voice and shut the window again, while Tuomas entered the car.  
"What did I say?" he asked with a face red as a tomato.  
"Something with making love. Calm down, I didn't hear to whom you want to make love," Tarja replied dryly and Tuomas let out a relieved breath.  
Of course she had heard every single word, but the poor boy was already embarrassed enough. "I'll drive you home," she said and took the young man's hand.


	26. Chapter 26

Tarja still knew where Tuomas lived.  
She drove him without asking him where he was living for a single time, she was only holding his hand as tight as she could while Tuomas was talking and talking. Tarja herself was laughing. Drunk people were so funny, they were talking so many stupid things without knowing what they were even talking. And he was talking fast and excited.  
"And Kaisa, that's Emppu's sister, told me I shouldn't drink anymore but then Paul, that's Kaisa's fiancé, came with another shot and I had to drink it," Tuomas blabbed. "Well I usually don't like Paul so much, he wasn't really nice to me in school, but he has changed. A little. Anyway, the drink was red and tasted like strawberries. I love berries, especially strawberries, but even more I love the smell of coconut and vanilla."  
Tarja laughed about his blabbing once again. "And why do you like coconut and vanilla?" she asked, even though she already knew the answer (she knew he had looked around in her bathroom).  
"Because you smell like it," Tuomas replied gently and brought her hand up to his nose, smelling on it. "Your skin smells like vanilla," he said gently and leaned in to bury his nose in her hair. "And your hair smells like coconut."  
"Glad you noticed," Tarja said gently and shivered as his cool lips touched her throat. "Gosh, Tuomas, hold yourself back ... I'm still driving."  
Tuomas pulled back. "Sorry," he said softly. "You know what, Emppu thought you were Susanna's friend. Susanna is my sister."  
"I know," Tarja replied with a laugh.  
"Yes, you're right." Tuomas nodded and Tarja had to laugh even more. "He asked me if you were her friend and as I said you're my teacher, I noticed that you really could be my sister ... As you said to that guy from the Rockhouse."  
Now Tarja groaned. "Tuomas, can we forget about that please? I apologise, I really didn't want to hurt you with that ... But if it helps, I will tell you why I kissed him, okay? See, I had the urge to kiss you and I couldn't, so I kissed him to fight the urge of grabbing you -"  
Tarja stopped the car, undid her seatbelt and threw herself in Tuomas' arms quickly. "- like this", she breathed and kissed him passionately.  
But as Tuomas wanted to deepen the kiss, Tarja pulled back.  
"You reek," she said. "I hate alcohol."  
"I'll stop drinking," Tuomas said quietly and cupped her cheeks. "For you. I'll do everything to make you happy. And you're lucky you don't have to restrain yourself anymore. You can kiss me whenever you want to."  
Tarja smiled.  
"I'll drive you home and then let's make out a little in the backseat, just like teenagers, hm?" she suggested and Tuomas nodded with a laugh.  
She put on her seatbelt again and started the car.  
A few minutes later she let the car roll in front of Tuomas' house and stopped it, making the lights go out.  
And then the two got into the backside of the car and Tarja immediately laid down on the seat, while Tuomas placed himself on her.  
"My beauty," he whispered and touched her lips with his.  
Their lips melted together, Tarja moaned as his hands moved over her upper body. She wrapped her arms and legs around his body and pulled him close to herself, her tongue soon finding a way into his mouth.  
And his time he didn't pull away, no, he responded with all the passion he was holding for her.  
Their tongues danced, Tuomas almost got crazy at the thought of that the warm thing inside this mouth was the same thing which caused this beautiful voice of his stunning teacher.  
Tuomas pulled away. "Tarja," he groaned. "Can I - can I touch you, please ..."  
But Tarja shook her head. "You're drunk, Tuomas. Let's save that ..." She smiled at him. "Good night, Mister French Kisser."  
Tuomas kissed her again, his lips gently on hers.  
"Good night ... Miss Turunen."  
Tarja laughed and ignored the emptiness in her chest as he stepped out of the car.  
Tuomas tumbled to the door and turned around again, smiling as he watched Tarja starting the car.  
"Bye, my Love," he whispered and threw a kiss at her.  
Tarja in the car laughed as she saw him throwing kisses as her.  
"See you, my man," she said and started driving, while the wish that Tuomas would live with her, so they could spend every minute together, was growing.

"Morning," Tuomas yawned as he sat down at the table.  
"Good afternoon," Kirsti greeted back. "Hungover?"  
"Totally," Tuomas muttered and looked at the clock. Oops, it was already half past two. "Damn."  
"Did you drink a lot?" Kirsti asked dryly and Tuomas moaned.  
"Definitely too much ..."  
"Did you come home at six or what? You've never slept so long before." Kirsti put a plate of food in front of her son, who grimaced, as his stomach turned itself. He pushed the plate away. "No I came home at about one," he lied. If someone had seen Tarja and him at midnight, he wanted to make sure that no one would find out that it had really been him -  
... Tarja!  
Tuomas gasped as he remembered that she hadn't waited for him in front of his house, no, she had picked him up and driven him home! And she had heard what he had said ...  
Tuomas moaned and ignored the worried look of his mother.  
"Oh no, oh damn, what have I done??" Tuomas muttered and slapped his forehead. "I honestly said that I - fuck!"  
"Tuomas?", Kirsti said and Tuomas looked at his mother.  
"I embarrassed myself," he said and blushed madly.  
'Oh, Tarja, I want to bang you into every cardinal direction ... No, I want to make proper love to you.'  
Had he really said that??  
"Okay?" Kirsti answered and went back to the kitchen. She had already given up hope to understand this boy. She had already given up as he had been seven. He had always been different, so why would it change because of a single girl?  
Tuomas seized the moment as his mother went back into the kitchen to run into the anteroom, grabbing the telephone book. He opened the pages of Helsinki and looked for the letter T. And there he found five people with the last name Turunen:  
Turunen, Anna  
Turunen, Marjatta  
Turunen, Ronni  
Turunen, Tarja  
Turunen, Teuvo  
So she was the only Tarja, luckily. He quickly dialled her number and waited with a beating heart.  
He needed to know if she really hadn't heard him, he needed to know!

Tarja smiled as her telephone rang, knowing that it could only be him.  
"Hold on, Kristina, I'll be back soon," she told her colleague and somehow best friend, who nodded and continued playing on the piano.  
Tarja was giving her lessons for ages already, but the woman wouldn't get better. Tarja knew it was her own fault, she wasn't born to be a piano teacher.  
"Turunen?"  
"Hey, Soile", the soft and slightly embarrassed voice of Tuomas reached her ear and Tarja giggled.  
"Hi, Lauri ..."  
Tuomas immediately got that she wasn't alone, so he blushed. "Do you have time or ...?"  
"I always have time for you," Tarja said quietly, so Kristina couldn't hear her.  
"Wow," Tuomas breathed. "Eh, I mean ... Thank you for driving me home yesterday."  
"You're welcome", Tarja said and started playing with the telephone cable. "How are you ...?"  
"I'm fine. Well, I'm a little hungover but after the amount of what I consumed yesterday it doesn't surprise me."  
Tarja giggled. "Oh yes ... My god, you said so many stupid things."  
"That's why I called," Tuomas sighed. "Did I ... Did I insult you?"  
"No," Tarja immediately said. "Well, you tried to talk about the fact that I called you my little brother but that's it ..."  
"I don't meant that." Tuomas sighed again. "Listen, T - Soile. I know what I said, I remember every word. And I need to know if you heard me ..."  
Tarja blushed. "You mean what you said before you got into the car?"  
"Yes," Tuomas whispered. "I'm so sorry for that."  
"Oh, Lauri," Tarja said, having fun with the little game they were playing. "You were drunk and hey, look at me. I understand you, if I was a man and saw a woman like me -"  
"Wow, you are really self-esteemed, you know that?"  
"I do know that and I'm happy I finally have a reason to be," Tarja said and thought back of her past herself. Then she laughed. "You are really lucky, you know?"  
"I know and I still can't believe it," Tuomas said and leaned back. "I guess I'll never believe it."  
Tarja smiled before she mumbled, "And I'm a lucky woman as well ..."  
And oh, how she was. He was cute, beautiful, gorgeous, talented, good looking, funny, smelled wonderful, he was sweet, he was gentle and he was able to love. She couldn't wait to be his first, she just couldn't.  
"Soile, I have to hang up. We'll visit my grandparents now."  
"Oh, okay", Tarja said and wished she could escort him to them. "Can I call you tomorrow?"  
"Of course", Tuomas said. "In the evening?"  
"Sure. At nine?"  
"Perfect." Tarja smiled. "Until then, Lauri ..."  
"Hear from you, Soile," Tuomas laughed and both hung up, both with a deep blush in their faces.  
While Tarja walked back into her bedroom, Tuomas tried to steal himself upstairs.  
But Kirsti caught him.  
"Who was that?"  
"Soile, again," Tuomas answered.  
"Did she go out with you yesterday?", Kirsti asked and Tuomas raised his brows.  
"No, why?"  
"Because you apologised for something you said to her -"  
"On Friday", Tuomas quickly said. "I said something stupid to her and had a bad conscience. And now bye."  
Meanwhile Tarja sat down next to her friend again, who grinned at her.  
"Lauri?"  
"Damn, your ears are just too good", Tarja groaned. "No wonder your students hate you."  
Kristina giggled and then elbowed her friend. "Are you having a crush on someone?"  
Tarja sighed. "More like feeling deep in love with someone ..."  
Kristina slapped Tarja's upper arm.  
"Dammit!" Tarja screamed. "Ouch, Kris! Why did you do that?!"  
"Because you didn't tell me you're in love, you false person!"  
"Damn, Kristina. That really hurt. I would have told you sooner or later but we only kissed for the first time last week - OUCH!!"  
Kristina had slapped her again.  
"You can go home if you continue slapping me!" Tarja scolded.  
"You KISSED?!" Kristina screeched without answering the singer. "Oh oh oh, I already hear the wedding bells!"  
Tarja sighed. "Stop it, Kris. It might be true, I'm in love but you totally overreact."  
"What's his last name?", Kristina asked. "How does he look like? Where does he work? Where do you know him from??"  
"I'll only tell you where I now him from," Tarja said, of course not intending to tell the truth at all. "I met him at the Rockhouse." Halfway true.  
"He's a rocker?? Oh, Tarja, that's amazing, that is so your type. Did you have a one night stand as usual?"  
"That's it, Kris, we only ... we only talked. And I fell I love." Tarja sunk her eyes.  
"Aww," the blonde Finnish and English teacher hugged the black haired music teacher. "How cute is that? But hun, what about Oliver?"  
"We still ... we still sleep with each other more or less," Tarja said slowly. What they did couldn't be called sleeping with each other, if Tarja was honest with herself. What he did to her. "But that has to stop. He has to stop as soon as Lauri and I are officially together."  
"He's still rough?" Kristina whispered and Tarja sighed.  
"Last week I started bleeding ..."  
"So the song was about him last Friday??" Kristina gasped and Tarja closed her eyes.  
"Indirectly. Lauri wrote it for me and somehow it fitted."  
Kristina nodded slowly. "Listen, hun, I have to go home soon or Rikki won't go to bed. My husband's just way too nice. Can we talk tomorrow or won't you have time for me because of Lauri?" The blonde wiggled her eyebrows and Tarja smiled at her best friend. "I'll call you."


	27. Chapter 27

The whole day, Tuomas was in a bad mood.  
He regretted telling his mother about Tarja, oh how he regretted it!  
Every five minutes he heard, "So, tell me about your girlfriend" from a different member of his family.  
And everyone of them he answered the same:  
"I won't, because it's none of your business."  
"The guy's lying," his cousin chuckled. "He'd never be able to get himself a girlfriend."  
"But I did!" Tuomas hissed. "And she's too hot to be real, be sure about that, Oskar!"  
Oskar laughed again. "Yes. He fantasised himself a hot girlfriend."  
Tuomas stood up without saying a word and sat down in the living room. "When will they leave again?" Tuomas asked his sister with a sigh and Susanna smiled.  
"Don't listen to Oskar. He has always been like this, you know that."  
Some of them left before nine, which was good, because Tuomas didn't need all of them to listen.  
Sadly he missed the ringing of the telephone because he was busy in the kitchen, and no one else than Oskar answered.  
"Holopainen?"  
"Hi, Tuomas," Tarja breathed. "It's me."  
Oskar grinned and sat down. "Hey, sexy lady ..."  
Tarja squinted her eyes first and then she laughed. "Hey, handsome. How are you?"  
"Bored," Oskar answered. "Could you come over? I need a sexy ass to grab."  
At first Tarja got a shock, but within a second she realised that it couldn't be Tuomas.  
"I have to talk to Tuomas," she said icily. "Of course I could come over, though, and rip off a special part of yours."  
"How hot," Oskar laughed. "Wow, you're quite the lady."  
"Get me Tuomas," Tarja hissed, "or you won't see daylight for a while ..."  
"Okay, geez, calm down!" Oskar answered. "Tell me your name, so I can tell him."  
"My name is none of your business," Tarja growled and Oskar laughed again, going away to get Tuomas.  
Tuomas almost slapped Oskar as he told him there was a sexy woman waiting for him on the telephone.  
"Did you annoy her?? If you did, I swear -"  
"I didn't annoy her," Oskar said and rolled his eyes. "She's a strong girl."  
'Woman ...,' Tuomas thought and ran to the telephone. "Soile?" he said gently to show her it was really him.  
"Yes, it's me," Tarja answered, glad that she could finally hear his voice. "Who was that guy?"  
"My cousin Oskar," Tuomas groaned and shut the door between the anteroom and the living room. "How are you ...?"  
"I'm fine," Tarja said gently. "Though I miss you so much ... I don't know if I can wait one more week to see you."  
Tuomas smiled. "I miss you too ... I can't stop thinking about you for a minute. I want to touch you ..."  
"I know," Tarja whispered, thinking back of Saturday. "But maybe we should wait."  
"I think so too," Tuomas sighed. "But I'll dream of you, as I do everyday and every night."  
Tarja's heart jumped. "I also dream of you everyday and every night," she admitted.  
For a while no one said a word. Why was it still so hard to talk to her? Well, she still was his teacher, and even though they had kissed for a few times already, he didn't want to scare her away.  
"What about New Year's Eve anyway?" Tarja suddenly asked. "Where and when should I pick you up?"  
"How about Kitee's school at five?" Tuomas asked. "You know where it is and no one will see us, I doubt there will be teachers or someone else ..."  
"Great," Tarja said and pulled the earpiece of the telephone closer, her heart beating madly. "I can't wait ..."  
"Me neither," Tuomas said quietly. "Our first date, Tarja ..."  
"I love it when you say my name," Tarja said gently and stroke her thigh absently. "My real name ... I wish you could be here now ... All the things we could do ..."  
"Slow, Love, slow." Tuomas chuckled and Tarja's heart almost stopped. Had he meant they could do things as in the book or had he said that because he wanted their relationship to move slowly? Because if he had meant it that way, he had called her 'Love'.  
"Okay," she said lowly. "I'll leave you alone, then."  
"Good night, Soile," Tuomas answered, cursing himself because of the book reference. How embarrassing, he had called her 'Love' already!  
"Good night, Lauri. I already miss your voice."  
"You can always call me", Tuomas offered. "Always. You never disturb."  
"Same goes to you," Tarja purred and stroke her thigh, wishing Tuomas was the one to do that.  
For a while no one said a word again, both didn't know what to say.  
"We should ... we should hang up", Tarja suggested.  
"We should but I don't want to," Tuomas admitted and Tarja giggled.  
"I don't want to either ... but hey, we'll soon see each other again."  
"Can't wait," Tuomas whispered and gripped the earpiece. "See you, my beauty ..."  
"See you, handsome man," Tarja purred and then they both ended the call.  
Tuomas pressed the telephone against his heart. It was beating madly and he couldn't calm down. "I love her, I love her so freaking much ..." he whispered.

But Tarja didn't call for the next days and Tuomas didn't dare to call her. What if Tarja would be annoyed? What if she had something else to do?  
Tarja also didn't dare to call him after that incident with Tuomas' cousin.  
But one day after Christmas, Tarja had to call him. It was his birthday, she had to!  
"Holopainen?"  
"Tuomas ...?"  
Tuomas smiled. "Hey, Tarja," he whispered and Tarja smiled.  
"Hey, handsome. I wish you a happy birthday."  
"Wow, thank you," Tuomas chuckled, his heart beating because she had remembered his birthday. "How are you?"  
"I'm fine", Tarja answered. "Still missing you, though ... I wanted to call you, but I was afraid that your cousin pretended to be you again."  
"No, luckily he's already gone for a few days" Tuomas sighed and Tarja smiled.  
"Merry Christmas, by the way."  
"Merry Christmas to you too," Tuomas answered and sighed as his mother called him. "Listen, I have to go. It's a little stressful today, we'll visit my grandparents again." He rolled his eyes. "I'm thinking about a way to escape and drive to you."  
"Do you have a car?" Tarja asked, suddenly eager to meet him, but Tuomas groaned.  
"No. I can drive but sadly I don't have a car ..."  
"Oh, pity," Tarja said. "Well, only six more days until we'll meet, then," she added gently. "I wish you a wonderful birthday, Tuomas." 'Now you're twenty-one and a little closer to my age ...'  
"Thanks again," Tuomas said. "Six more days, Tarja ..."  
"Six days," Tarja answered, her heart beating.

After that day, no one of them called again. But New Year's Eve came closer.  
Tarja had bought a Sonata Arctica CD for him (Ecliptica) and a black/red scarf (he had only been coughing over the last weeks and Tarja could remember a shirt of him with which the scarf would fit perfectly).  
She wrapped it carefully and with a smile on her lips, putting the card on the present.  
Birthday boy, she had written.  
I wish you so much happiness with these gifts. I hope you like them, they come from the depths of my heart, such as your beautiful songs for me do.  
You made my life a better one, I hope I can at least give you a little light of happiness in yours.  
Tarja.  
She had been nervous as she had written it, but now she was sure about it. He had to know how happy he made her. He only kissed her and every worry fell off her, every thought about Oliver or the stress of finding her true love fell off of her. Every thought about her ex-boyfriend she still had, every thought about the urge of creating a family ... All those thoughts got combined to one when they kissed.  
And this thought was:  
'He's the right one. Tuomas is my true love.'

"So, you have a date with T tonight?" Susanna raised her eyebrows. "Kai and I came to celebrate new year with my family, but okay."  
"Sorry," Tuomas said and hugged his sister.  
"No problem, have fun," Susanna sighed and hugged him back. "I guess you'll stay the night?"  
"I don't know, I think so," Tuomas said surprised.  
"You could invite her here. We could make a fondue and play games like a big family!" Susanna suggested excitedly and her brother grimaced.  
"Sussu ... I don't know. We'll see."  
And he quickly left, Susanna's gaze in his neck.  
After a while the blonde woman grabbed her fiancé's hand and pulled him towards the anteroom, starting to dress herself.  
"You'll come with me," she demanded. "I need to see this girl of my brother."  
And this was why Kai and Susanna followed the young man by car. They drove slowly and always made sure to have a little distance between each other, and this way Tuomas didn't even notice that there was a silver Volvo behind him all the time.  
He smiled broadly as he saw the black Ford standing in front of the middle school, and he started jumping excitedly as the dark haired woman, who was leaning against her car, ripped herself away and approached him with a smile.  
"Can you see her?" Susanna asked helplessly. She knew she needed glasses, but she hated them too much to wear them. "I only see that she has long, dark hair."  
"She's beautiful," Kai answered. "Very. And she has a car."  
"Hm," Susanna said. "How old is she? What do you think?"  
"I don't know, around twenty-four, twenty-five?" Kai said. "From what I see she looks skinny."  
"I also see that," Susanna, who was a curvy woman, scolded. "Her face?"  
"Very pretty," Kai said and grimaced as the young couple kissed. "Now I see nothing of her face anymore."  
Susanna sighed. "Let's drive back? I can't and also don't want to watch my little brother kiss someone."  
Kai agreed relieved.

Their lips finally had each other again, after ten days of not feeling each other's lips.  
Their tongues met in an erotic dance and Tuomas pulled Tarja close as he could, tasting every corner of her mouth.  
Tarja's hands went upwards and grabbed his hair, pulling him more down to herself. While she opened her mouth and moaned, he grabbed her waist and made their lower regions collide.  
That was when she pulled away her face.  
"Happy belated birthday," she whispered and Tuomas pecked her lips.  
"This is the best birthday present I've received," he whispered and Tarja blushed.  
In her car there was his real present waiting ...  
"Well, let's drive?" she asked shyly. "You have to tell me where to drive."  
"Sure, let's get inside," Tuomas said and they did, their lips finding each other's in the car once again after they entered.  
They kissed for a few minutes, gently, passionately, lovingly, until Tarja pulled away.  
"Or should we stay in the car?" she suggested and Tuomas laughed.  
"Later. For now I'm hungry."  
Tarja raised her brow, not telling him though, what she was thinking about to offer him.  
Instead of that she started the car, her cheeks flushed because of the imagination of what she just thought about.  
'Gosh, I can't ask him to do that for me,' Tarja thought. 'We aren't even officially together yet.'  
Tuomas guided her out of Kitee and onto the highway, into the direction that led to Helsinki.  
"About fifteen minutes from here there's a Chinese we always went to, my friends and I. Well, before everyone started to have girlfriends or other problems."  
Tarja laughed. "So you refer having a girlfriend as a problem?"  
"Both is, having one and having none," Tuomas answered a little and Tarja laughed again.  
"Or having two," she answered and they laughed together.  
Tuomas was so relieved.  
She was such a wonderful human being, beautiful, funny, amazing, ... Tuomas decided that he didn't have to be ashamed to tell her something, she was more than mature enough to handle him.  
After a while he told her where to drive off the highway, and as she did, she had to use the gearshift. Her hand was so close to Tuomas', and before he could take her hand, she had already taken his.  
They said nothing until they came to stand in front of the restaurant, then they looked at each other and Tuomas pulled her close.  
He captured her lips and kissed her sweetly, making Tarja as loved as she had never felt before.  
The boy seemed as if he'd never get enough of her.  
And Tarja hoped he wouldn't.


	28. Chapter 28

They chose a table in a corner, far away from everyone, in case someone would recognise one of them.  
As soon as they had ordered their drinks and a bowl of rice had been placed on their table, Tarja took both of Tuomas' hands.  
The sky blue eyes met the meadow green ones and the young couple smiled at each other.  
Tarja looked so calm, so in peace with herself. Tuomas felt that she was enjoying their date and smiled shyly.  
He still couldn't believe his luck.  
The waitress, a small Chinese woman, put their cokes on the table and then asked - in pretty funny Finnish - what they wanted to eat. And as she walked away again, Tarja started caressing her opposite's hand, her gaze dreamily on his hand, her lips curled into a soft smile.  
"You have beautiful hands," she suddenly said and Tuomas chuckled.  
"Do I?"  
Tarja nodded. "They only can be beautiful, concerning to what you do with them."  
"You mean writing songs and playing piano, right?" Tuomas asked and Tarja looked at him in fake shock.  
"Of course! You dirty minded boy!"  
Tuomas let his eyes sink on his hands as well. "Those hands are still virgins, such as their owner is," he admitted quietly and Tarja squeezed his hands.  
"Maybe not for a long time anymore," she whispered, her eyes shining.  
And again Tuomas' heart made a huge jump as he recalled the fact that it was true, she would be his first one, a woman as no one else, almost ten years older than him but as perfect and loving as no one else could be.  
"With you?" he croaked before he could restrain himself, cursing himself soon after. But Tarja smiled at him and nodded slightly.  
"If you want to," she said, letting it sound more like a question.  
And Tuomas blushed madly. "More than anything, Tarja ..."  
They went quiet when the waitress brought their food, and didn't talk for a while when they started to eat.  
"This is good," Tarja said. "I normally don't like Chinese food that much, but this tastes acceptable."  
"Why didn't you tell me?" Tuomas asked. "I could have brought you to another restaurant. Oh god, now I feel bad."  
"Will you stop already?" Tarja said. "It's okay, now you know that I'm not that much of a Chinese food-fan and that's good. You also don't know other things about me, for example that my favourite colour is red."  
"Well, now I know that your favourite colour is red," Tuomas countered. "Mine is green, but only since I've met you for the first time."  
"Why -?" Tarja started but she remembered within a second and her face started glowing. "Oh. How cute ..."  
"What else do I have to know about you?" Tuomas asked before he took a bite of his chicken sweet and sour.  
"Something very, very important would be that I have ... I have a light form of OCD." Tarja said and Tuomas squinted his eyes.  
"What ... What is that?" he asked, immediately getting worried. "Does that mean you're seriously ill?"  
He first thought of a bad genital disease, something she got from one of her one night stands, but Tarja laughed.  
"Gosh, no. That means I have a light form of a compulsion neurosis when it comes to tidiness and cleanness. It's called 'Obsessive-compulsive disorder', short OCD."  
"That's why your flat looks so unnaturally tidy and clean?" Tuomas guessed and Tarja nodded.  
"It's only showing when it comes to my home or my body. I can't stand it to get dirty but sometimes I also manage to forget about it. I've already been at festivals for a few times. The first day was horror, but then I totally forgot about the OCD and could have my fun for the rest of the days. But sometimes it's showing more ... Mostly when someone visited me at home ..." She blushed. "If you know what I mean ..."  
Tuomas nodded, feeling sorry for her. "That must be hard."  
"Nah, not at all. It's actually good, this way my apartment is always clean." Tarja chuckled. "And I have a feeling that it's getting better lately, I don't have the urge to wash my hands right now."  
They smiled at each other and then Tuomas frowned. "Do you have a, how do you say, OCD attack? When we kiss?"  
Tarja shook her head. "Not at all. As I said, it's mostly about keeping my apartment clean, I can't stand it when there's something on the floor."  
Tuomas didn't answer. He had never heard about that, but he hoped that it wasn't worse than she had told him.   
They finished eating and continued talking about this and that.  
Tarja told him about her education and that she had been a teacher at the Sibelius for a while, even though Tuomas already knew that.  
She told him about her first boyfriend, Noel, and that she still thought of him sometimes.  
"I guess you won't stop doing that," Tuomas said. "No one can forget his first love."  
Tarja smiled again, thanking God for sending her this perfect, perfect man.  
Tuomas told her about Anna, his first girlfriend, and now he also finally told her the whole story.  
"She laughed about me because I still was a virgin," he said quietly. "She said I was a wimp because I wrote poems. She told everyone she was my alibi-girlfriend ..."  
"What!?" Tarja whispered shocked.  
Tuomas nodded. "She said I was ... I was gay, especially after she found out about the poems ... And she wasn't the only one. Paul and some others bullied me because of that ..."  
"Oh, Tuomas," Tarja said gently and pulled him close to her, pressing her lips on his over the table. "I don't get mankind, you're so wonderful ..."  
"Anna liked me," Tuomas said. "But not in that way. I guess she wanted me to have my coming out and then be her gay best friend."  
Tarja giggled and countered, "If she could see you now, my straight boyfriend ..."  
Tuomas' heart stopped for a moment as she called him her 'boyfriend' for the first time.  
He smiled. "And then I ran away because she wanted to take my virginity - with S and M. You know that story already."  
Tarja nodded, a little disappointed that he hadn't quite reacted to her calling him his boyfriend - until he took her hand.  
"So we ... We're officially a couple? I can call you my girlfriend now officially?"  
"Yeah, I guess so," Tarja said. "I would say yes. I mean, we've already kissed for a few times ..." But then she frowned. "Tuomas ... We can't tell anyone. This is so complicated. We have to stay a secret, I could lose my job, I could even go straight to jail."  
"But I'm adult," Tuomas whispered. "I'm twenty-one ..."  
"I'm your teacher. It's forbidden. This could destroy our lives," Tarja whispered and Tuomas' heart broke as he saw tears glistening in her eyes.  
"Don't cry," he pleaded. "I could go to another college if it helps, I don't want to lose you ..."  
"This is too complicated, Tuomas!" Tarja cried quietly, suddenly only seeing the danger in their relationship.  
"But I can't lose you," Tuomas said desperately. "I love you, Tarja."  
Tarja's look softened as she stopped hyperventilating after Tuomas had told her he loved her.  
"You ... You love me?" Tarja whispered and Tuomas nodded, his face deep red.  
Tarja sighed. "That doesn't make it easier for us. We have to stay secret, okay?"  
Tuomas nodded. "Even though I'd like to introduce you to my parents", he said lowly and Tarja sighed.  
"I also want you to meet my parents. Let's say we mustn't tell anyone for the beginning, not even our parents. And after we know what they think about our relationship and if they even accept it, we can introduce each other to them."  
"I like the fact that you're older than me," Tuomas mumbled. "You have more life experience and you will know how to handle all this complicated stuff ..."  
"Together with you," Tarja said and pulled him close.

A while later they left, gripping a bottle of plum brandy and two fortune cookies.  
They entered the car and Tarja put the bottle on her boyfriend's lap. "You can have it," she said with a frown. "I really don't like alcohol."  
"And I'll really stop for you," Tuomas said and shrugged. "I'll give it to my parents."  
Tarja grinned and started the car. They had had the spontaneous idea to drive somewhere and wait until midnight, and after Tuomas had thought for a while, they drove back to Kitee.  
While he led her where he wanted her to drive, they talked about various stuff again.  
"And a little later I learned to play saxophone, but I didn't like it as much as clarinet or piano," he said. "And when I was sixteen, I visited a friend in America, who turned me into a metalhead. Since then I haven't even touched whether the sax nor the clarinet." He chuckled. "And when I turned seventeen, I got my own keyboard. Soon after that, my friends and I started our first band. It was so bad, I'll tell you, but Kaisa took singing lessons and now our band is quite acceptable."  
"What a story," Tarja laughed. "I didn't know you had a band. Who's in it besides Kaisa?"  
"Emppu," Tuomas answered and Tarja started laughing madly. After she was done, Tuomas grinned. "And Kaisa is Emppu's sister."  
"You told me when you were drunk, Tuomas", Tarja giggled and Tuomas blushed.  
"Oops. Damn. Well, change of subject, Emppu, Kaisa, me and Jukka. But Jukka is constantly down because of everything, he already left the band for several times. And since Kaisa and Paul are engaged now, our band is pausing."  
"What a pity," Tarja said. "I would have loved to hear your band."  
"Nightwish," Tuomas said gently. "That was our band."  
"What, was Daywish already given?" Tarja joked and Tuomas pouted.  
"You're stupid."  
Tarja smiled. "I know. And I guess you love me for that?"  
"I love you for everything you do and say," Tuomas mumbled, kneading his hands.  
He smiled as Tarja took his hand again. "Where are we driving?"  
"You'll see," Tuomas said and looked at her. "Do you play other instruments as well?"  
Tarja nodded. "I started playing the flute when I was only five," she answered. "My mother told me I needed to learn how to breathe correctly while singing, and playing the flute helped me a lot. I started singing when I was two."  
"Two??" Tuomas gasped and Tarja giggled.  
"Mother says I was a dancer before I could walk," she started singing spontaneously. "She says I began to sing long before I could talk."  
"Beautiful," Tuomas said. "So for you it was like that?"  
"Well, the singing part," Tarja said. "You know I can't dance."  
"I also don't, so who cares."  
They smiled at each other quickly, before Tarja concentrated on the street again. "And then I stopped playing the flute because I learnt how to play the piano. From your mother." She grinned. "Half a year later we moved to Helsinki and there I continued playing the piano plus singing. After my singing teacher told me I should continue playing the flute because of the same reason as my mother had told me, I decided to learn playing transverse flute. And I still do."  
"You play transverse flute? Wow, beautiful," Tuomas said.  
"I have to, it still helps me a lot with breathing. If you have a weak lung, you can't sing. Sport also helps a lot and of course I have to sing everyday."  
"That sounds so exhausting," Tuomas mumbled and Tarja laughed.  
"What, doing sports?"  
"That too." Tuomas said with a shiver. "I hate sports."  
"I will make you love it," Tarja said with a wink.  
They discussed for a while, until Tarja had to stop. "Water," she said. "Are we right here?"  
Tuomas nodded and pointed at his island. "Do you see the island there?"  
"Yes," Tarja said. "Don't tell me we want to go there."  
"If you don't want to, we don't have to," Tuomas said. "I just thought we could drive to a hill and wait until midnight and after that we could come here. There's a cottage on the island and I could make a fire and -"  
"Is the island yours?" Tarja whispered and Tuomas sighed.  
"My family's. And I'd love to show it to you ... after we've watched the fireworks ..."  
Tarja smiled again and hugged him. "I'd love that," she whispered and stroke his cheek and added, "and ... and I love you too, Tuomas." before she locked their lips in a longing kiss, which left Tuomas speechless.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Song reference: Thank You For The Music by ABBA]


	29. Chapter 29

They were sitting on the engine hood of Tarja's car, leaning against the front shield.  
They were holding on to each other tightly, Tuomas caressing the love of his life's shoulder, while Tarja gently played with her boyfriend's fingers.  
At some point they had decided to open the bottle of plum brandy, both of them only had taken one sip though. Tarja had almost vomited anyway, she usually avoided drinking sorts of alcohol which had more than 10% alcohol in it.  
"You're so beautiful," Tuomas sighed as Tarja looked up to him, worrying why he didn't say a word. But as he called her beautiful, she blushed slightly and smiled. "I don't deserve you."  
"I'm the one who doesn't deserve you," Tarja said and reached up to touch Tuomas' cheek.  
Tuomas closed his eyes, listening to the sounds of fireworks which exploded on the sky.  
"Is it midnight?" he asked and Tarja pulled his face down.  
"I guess so," she said and stroke his hair behind his ears. "Happy new year."  
"Happy new year," Tuomas replied and their lips met in a gentle way. Tarja slung her arms around the young man, deepening the kiss.  
Tuomas' heart sped up, as always when their tongues were added to the kiss. They danced, fought, caressed each other, and Tarja moaned lightly. She parted her legs and sat down on Tuomas' lap, pressing her upper body against his. After a while of giving everything into the kiss, she again started to rub her pelvis against his middle area and Tuomas moaned loudly. She really seemed to want him, but she had to understand that he couldn't take her yet.  
He tried to think of something else while her lips and tongue were driving him crazy, so he let his hands wander over the fabric of her jacket, groping her waist wanting. He couldn't wait to rip it off of her ...  
Tarja rubbed herself against his body even more longing now and so Tuomas reached down and grabbed her butt cheeks.  
Tarja shrieked and pulled away, while Tuomas opened his eyes.  
And what he saw was too amazing to be real. He was sure he had died and gone to heaven.  
Her face was white, but her cheeks were red. Her eyes were big and green and shone down to him, holding so much love inside of them.  
Her black, curly hair (it had been snowing before, so her flat hair had vanished) framed her pale and porcelain skin and behind her, on the sky, firework after firework exploded.  
"You're an angel," Tuomas whispered and Tarja smiled.  
"I might be. Meanwhile you seem to enjoy touching my ass."  
Tuomas pulled his hands away slowly. "You're ... You look like an angel," he now said and Tarja giggled.  
"And you sound as if you've seen one ..."  
"I'm looking at one," Tuomas answered and pulled her down. He gently laid his lips against her cheek, close to her ear, and whispered, "and now I'm kissing one."  
Tarja closed her eyes as Tuomas started caressing her skin with his soft lips. She could feel his beard graze her skin lightly and moaned when he moved lower, gently nipping at her neck.  
"I love your scent," Tuomas mumbled against her throat, a feeling that went right to Tarja's core.  
"I know," she moaned, not daring to tell him how wet she already was. If he would be another guy, one of those she had met at bars, they would have their third time already in one night. But this was perfect, they acted slowly and patiently. He was too romantic, too perfect for her ... Tarja had never taken a man's virginity and she of course had already given up hope long time ago. But here he was, her perfect man, the man whose virginity she was allowed to take soon.  
And this perfect man smiled up to her now and said sweetly, "When I kiss you, I hear symphonies in my head."  
"I'm looking forward to what you feel once we've slept together," Tarja replied dryly and laughed as Tuomas moaned lowly.  
"Can't wait," he mumbled and grabbed her ass again. "Your ass is really sexy, by the way."  
"Glad you like it," Tarja chuckled lowly and wiggled her ass. "Let's go into the car? It's cold and I want to fumble."  
Tuomas laughed and together they went down from the hood, getting back into the car.  
Tarja switched the radio on and pressed the button which threw out the Sonata Arctica CD she had been listening to as she had driven to Kitee, instead she put in another CD before she crawled into the backseat, sitting down next to him.  
"What is that?" Tuomas asked and smiled as soft piano music started to fill the car.  
"Nothing special ... A few of my covers I recorded," Tarja said and slowly opened his jacket.  
"You play that?" Tuomas whispered.  
"Mhm," Tarja mumbled and travelled her index finger along Tuomas' chest.  
"I love it," Tuomas breathed and helped her sliding off his jacket, continuing with opening his own.  
The jackets fell down and their lips found each other once again, their hands pulling on each others clothes.  
Tarja's hands roamed over his chest and stomach, finding the edge of his shirt and inserting her hands into it.  
"Is that okay for you?" she whispered.  
"You don't have to ask," Tuomas whispered back. "Everything you do to me is okay."  
Tarja smiled and gently pecked his lips, caressing his naked skin.  
Tuomas closed his eyes, a feeling of luck filling his heart. The tunes of Tarja's piano playing in his ears, Tarja's scent in his nose, Tarja's hands on his chest, Tarja's tongue inside his mouth.  
Tuomas moaned and pulled away. "Tarja - I'm so - I'm so sorry," he stuttered. "I'm just ... I'm not able to restrain myself. I feel so ashamed ..."  
"Shhh," Tarja whispered and laid her lips on his, before she let one of her hands travel down. Tuomas swallowed as she applied some pressure on his growing erection.  
"It's natural," Tarja whispered. "You need it. You're ready. And you know that I'm the one to give it to you."  
"Still, I want to wait," Tuomas said quietly and Tarja nodded. "That's okay, I understand it. I lost my virginity to a man who didn't love me and now I really regret that." She took his hand. "But Tuomas ... You are not just a fling to me. I love you, and I mean it. You're my ... You're my ..."  
"True love?" Tuomas whispered and Tarja nodded softly, her cheeks deep red.  
"Wow," Tuomas chuckled. "A teacher told me I'm her true love ..." Tarja bit her lip to stop it from quivering, but Tuomas pulled her close and soon they were entwined in a deep kiss once again.

Their lips already felt sore after they pulled away after a felt eternity.  
They had kissed and touched each other through five whole songs, one of them being a piano part with Tarja's humming in the background, and one of them being a song played by Tarja on the transverse flute.  
"This turns me so on," Tuomas sighed and Tarja started humming along the soft sounds of the flute.  
"Me too," Tarja whispered and then admitted, "I'm already quite wet. You're a good kisser."  
"You are the good kisser," Tuomas said shyly, not knowing what to think of what she just had told him. She was so ready for him and he was ready as well ... But still he was afraid. He hated himself for that but the fact that he would sleep with his teacher made him almost go insane. True, she was a normal woman, but she was his teacher, not just any teacher. This relationship wasn't normal!  
"We should drive ..."  
"Yes, we should," Tarja agreed. "But first I have to give something to you."  
Tuomas moaned as Tarja crawled to the front seats of the car again and thus gave him a good view of her rear.  
She giggled as Tuomas slapped her ass with a sound and looked back. "Don't break it."  
"Break you? I can't break you, you're a strong woman."  
Tarja didn't reply anything, with shaking hands she opened the glove compartment beneath the radio and pulled out the little parcel.  
"Be careful," Tarja pleaded after she had placed herself next to the young man again. "Don't break it," she chuckled once more and Tuomas looked at her.  
"Tarja ...?"  
"Happy late birthday ... and merry Christmas," Tarja said gently and touched the little clef she was always wearing.  
Tuomas looked up to her and noticed how she toched it, just as if she wanted to check if it was still there.  
"You shouldn't have ..." Tuomas started, but Tarja interruped him.  
"You also shouldn't have, an now open it already."  
Tuomas chuckled and opened it, first laughing about the scarf. "You knew I needed one!" he said and as he unfolded it, his gaze fell on Ecliptica and he gasped.  
"Tarja ... Tarja ... Wow."  
Tarja smiled, completely in awe about his reaction. "Like it?"  
"It's amazing!" Tuomas breathed and hugged her. "You knew I started listening to them because of you ..."  
Tarja lifted her shoulders and then returned his hug. "It was more like intuition," she said. "And I don't have this album, so you will have to give it to me for a while ..." She winked.  
"Yes, totally ... I mean, that's totally okay for me." Tuomas swallowed, not quite able to form his words. Tarja giggled because of his helpless gaze and pulled him close.  
"What? Are you amazed that I gave something to you? Look at all those things you're giving to me, a necklace, fun, love, ..." She pecked his lips gently and smiled. "I can't wish for more, Tuomas. Because what I've been wishing for, is now in my arms."  
"I didn't know that you could be romantic as well," Tuomas whispered and hugged his Love.  
"I try to, but next to you I still look like a beginner," Tarja said dryly and Tuomas buried his face in the nape of her neck, kissing the sensitive skin there.  
Tarja sighed and caressed his back. "Didn't you want to show me your island?"  
"Oh, true," Tuomas said and pulled away. "Do you already want to go to sleep?"  
"As long as you're right next to me," Tarja whispered and they shared another passionate kiss, before they both crawled into the front of the Ford again and Tarja started the car to drive back to the shore.

The water wasn't frozen yet, so they didn't have a problem to drive with the boat. After fifteen long and cold minutes, the boat crashed against the shore of the little island and Tuomas jumped off, pulling it onto the island. Tarja admired his strength and wanted to help him by pushing from behind the boat, but Tuomas declined her offer, telling her he would do that alone. And after he had wrapped the rope of the boat around a tree, he helped his lady out of the little boat.  
"Come in and enjoy my second home," Tuomas chuckled after he had led her to the cottage. He opened the door and sighed. "I'll prepare a fire, meanwhile ... Meanwhile you can sit down on the couch. There should be a blanket beneath it."  
"I'll help you," Tarja insisted and followed him outside.  
She helped him carrying the pieces of wood inside, and went outside again while Tuomas knelt down to light the fire.  
After a few minutes a little fire was cracking in the open fireplace and the young couple sat down on the soft carpet in front of it, a warm blanket wrapped around of them.  
Tuomas hugged the slim woman and pulled her close to him, a happy smile on his lips.  
They said nothing for a while, until Tarja's head fell down as she had fallen asleep for a second.  
Tuomas laughed, but he gently pulled her up and started preparing the couch for them. Tarja started undressing herself, her cheeks flushed, and as Tuomas turned around, his breath got caught in his lungs.  
She was beautiful.  
Her black underwear looked sexy on her white, delicate skin, and her body got only lightened by the fire behind her. "I can't wear my clothes in bed," she said quietly and looked down in her body. "And I usually don't wear my bra but ... Well."  
Tuomas only nodded, his eyes still travelling over the curves of her slim body. She stepped closer as she saw the longing look in his eyes and as soon as his fingers had touched her waist, Tarja locked their lips.  
And together they fell on the couch, caressing each other, kissing, feeling each other how much they loved the other.  
They fell asleep arm in arm, their lips close to each other's.


	30. Chapter 30

Tarja sighed happily as she opened her eyes and first thing she saw was him.  
"Good morning," she whispered. "I've dreamt of my prince to come and here you are."  
"You're so perfect, my princess," Tuomas whispered back and kissed her. "I can't imagine a better way to start into a new year."  
Tarja yawned. "Hungry," she mumbled. "Do we have food?"  
"Sadly not, my love," Tuomas said. "But there's a bakery in Kitee -"  
"That one next to the shops?" Tarja interrupted him. "Don't you think someone would see us?"  
"Then let's drive just anywhere?" Tuomas asked and Tarja nodded.  
"But first of all, come here," she purred and rolled him over, sitting down on his lap. Her hands trailed over his chest and Tuomas' eyes fell on the clef, the proof of his love for her. It was resting between the valley of her breasts and Tuomas reached up to touch it.  
"So beautiful on you," he mumbled and Tarja bent down.  
"Touch me, please," she said gently and Tuomas trailed his fingertips along the soft skin of her breasts.  
"So perfect," he mumbled, his heart swelling with love for this amazing woman. He looked up and met her shining eyes. She nodded at him encouraging and Tuomas carefully cupped her breasts through her black bra. He could feel her hardened nipples through the thin fabric and swallowed.  
"Tarja ..." he croaked and Tarja bent down even more. Now her forehead was touching his, while Tuomas' thumbs played with her nipples.  
"Yes?" she asked sweetly.  
"This isn't ... This isn't a foreplay right now, or is it ...?"  
Tarja chuckled. "If you want it to be. But of you don't want to, it can also be a fore-fore-fore-foreplay or more."  
"I love you," Tuomas said empathising. "I still can't believe my luck that I actually have you ... It all seemed so impossible, the most beautiful woman on earth was my teacher and she was a hellcat, I could only wish that she liked me ... and now I'm here in bed with her."  
Tarja chuckled. "I'm a hellcat?"  
"In the best way," Tuomas said and pecked her lips. "You're my hellcat."  
"Alright, I'm a hellcat but I'm not the most beautiful woman on earth," Tarja said with a pout, and Tuomas took her lower lips between his, sucking on it gently.  
"For me you are," he mumbled and Tarja pulled away.  
"I fell in love with you in the Rockhouse," she said seriously. "The first time we met, the Tuesday ... You told me things I've never thought of, showed me things I had never seen in men until I met you. Romance. Love. Care. You opened my eyes ... Thus I fell in love with you. I also couldn't believe that you could feel the same, that's why I stated flirting ..."  
"Glad you did," Tuomas said and Tarja grabbed his wrists.  
"I'm not too old for you?";she asked worriedly and Tuomas snorted.  
"As I told you, I'm happy you're older. I don't want a girl, you know that. I want and I have a woman, a real woman. You."  
Tarja blushed, suddenly feeling turned on by their current state - him pressing her on the bed, telling her he wanted a woman and only her.  
"If you're hungry ..." Tarja started, but didn't end the sentence.  
"Same offer as yesterday?" Tuomas chuckled and cupped her face. "Do you need it that much?"  
But Tarja shook her head. "I need you that much," she whispered and Tuomas locked their lips in a gentle, this time slower but not less passionate, kiss. His left hand stayed on her cheek, while his right hand slowly crept down, grazing her breast, her stomach ... And gently touched her abdomen, moving lower slowly.  
Tarja had her eyes closed, eager to feel everything he did down there, and she gently parted her legs to give him a better access in touching. She sighed into his mouth, but suddenly he pulled away, both his lips and hand.  
"No ...",Tarja mumbled. "Go on, please ..."  
"I can't, Tarja. I don't know how to ... go on." Tuomas blushed. "I mean, of course I know but hell, I'm so scared ..."  
"Of what?"bTarja whispered.  
"That you ... That you won't like it," Tuomas breathed against her lips and Tarja pecked them gently. "Why wouldn't I like it? I know that your hands are skilled ..." She took them. "But it's okay, you're not ready. I understand that."  
They smiled at each other and then got up slowly.  
They dressed and while Tuomas put the blanket and the pillows away Tarja walked around in the little cottage. They had been cuddling the whole evening, so Tarja had had no chance to have a look at it, but now she did. It wasn't a big cottage, Tarja doubted that the whole Holopainen family had already slept there together. From what she found (Playboys and porns under a bed, condoms and sex toys in a drawer), it seemed to be a cottage for ... someone else than Tuomas. But as she walked into the next room, she smiled broadly.  
She immediately saw that this was her boyfriend's room.  
Pictures of him and his friends were pinned on a wall, around a self written banner, that said "Nightwish" in big letters. Loads of books were in a bookshelf. And a small, portable television was standing on his nightstand. Tarja giggled as she imagined him watching TV to drown the sound of a lovemaking couple in the next room.  
"Soon we will be the lovemaking couple," Tarja whispered and stroke over the blanket. She bit her lip and got down on her knees, eager to check what was beneath the bed. But she found nothing besides one Playboy, no single porn was there.  
Grinning, Tarja pulled out the Playboy and carefully flipped through it, but it looked quite ... Unused? As if he hadn't even looked at it yet.  
Tarja shook her head. This boy.  
"Having fun?" Tuomas suddenly laughed behind her and Tarja got such a shock, the Playboy fell out of her hand.  
Tuomas moved closer and Tarja wrapped her arms around him. "I could ask you the same in the past - had fun?"  
"No," Tuomas immediately replied. "As I told you, my hands are virgins, such as my body is. I was here with Jukka and his girlfriend once and Jukka gave the magazine to me. But I didn't even touch it, I turned my music on loud and this way I didn't hear anything. Gosh, I'm so old fashioned ..."  
"Are you crazy?" Tarja said gently. "You're romantic! And I once thought all men are the same ..."  
Tuomas smiled weakly. "One of the reasons why the rumours about me got spread."  
"My boyfriend is romantic and I love that," Tarja said and pulled him down. "I love him the way he is and I don't care about his past. He's mine and for this I'm thankful."  
Tuomas thanked her with another kiss, his heart bustring with luck. Honestly - had he even deserved her?

They drove back in the boat and together they scraped off the snow of Tarja's car. As they got inside, Tarja suddenly started thinking.  
"What?" Tuomas asked as she looked at him, but not starting the car.  
"I have to change my panty," she said before she started laughing madly. "I just thought of how to manage that."  
"I'll look away," Tuomas offered and Tarja laughed even more.  
"Of course you don't have to, but thanks."  
She moved back and pulled a fresh panty out of her bag (Tuomas slapped her ass again as she held it into his face and they both started laughing). While Tuomas concentrated on the street in front of him, Tarja quickly changed her panty (the other one had been way too damp, only because of his passionate kisses and touches). After she was done, she crawled back to the front seats and placed herself on Tuomas' lap. "Let's drive, honey?" she asked touched his lips gently with hers. Tuomas nodded and leaned his forehead against hers.  
"I know a little bakery outside Kitee but I don't know if it has opened today. I suggest we drive and see ...?"  
Tarja nodded. "Do you want to drive?" she offered and Tuomas nodded, amazed that this woman, love of his life, trusted him enough for this. Maybe she just wanted to show him that she trusted him enough. Tuomas smiled as Tarja got off him and outside, Tuomas followed her, and while Tarja got back into the car, Tuomas crossed it and sat down in front of the steering wheel.

Tuomas was a careful driver, much as Tarja had expected. He put Tarja's self taped CD in again but didn't turn loud and he didn't talk much. A while later they came to stand in front of said bakery, and Tuomas got out to check if it was open. It was, so he waved at his love and entered to get a table for them.  
Tarja locked her car and followed him inside, still not quite able to believe what an amazing boyfriend she had.  
He loved her.  
He was a musician.  
He respected her.  
He was a virgin!  
It sounded ridiculous, but Tarja couldn't wait to deflower him.  
'Just look at him,' she thought. 'How happy he is ...'  
Really, he just sat there and smiled at her broadly. It was easy to say that he was head over heels into her.  
And so was Tarja, she loved this boy - man, she loved him from the depth of her heart. She was so happy that he had finally dared to kiss her almost two weeks ago, she didn't know what she would have done if he hadn't.  
Tarja sat down, and after ordering two cups of coffee, cereals and bread with marmalade, they shared a long and loving kiss.  
While they were eating their breakfast, they planned their day. While holding and caressing each others hands, they talked about what they could do, and after a while they decided to spend this day and the upcoming night in a spa.  
Said, done.  
Tarja brought Tuomas home, and while she hid herself in her car, Tuomas packed everything for more nights in a bag. With his cheeks as red as tomatoes he explained to his mother that him and "T" were a couple now, officially, and that he would spend the next days with her.  
Kirsti warned him to use protection again, and after a short discussion, Tuomas shouted that he still was a virgin, just before he fled out of the house.  
His mother watched the black Ford drive away, but didn't see much of the driver, and too late she had the idea to look at the car sign - it was already too far away.

They drove to Tarja's home, and while Tuomas looked for spas in Tarja's telephone book, Tarja was packing her stuff. She was nervous, she had never been in a spa with a man alone before, only with her family or friends.  
"Did you find something yet?" Tarja called while she packed her towels.  
"Helsinki Day Spa, is that a good one?" Tuomas called back and her heart started fluttering.  
"Yes, I've been there only once, though," Tarja answered. "Just call and ask for a room!"  
And while Tuomas dialled the spa's number, Tarja locked the door to her bathroom, before she pulled out her epilator. She didn't care much about the hair on her legs (well, besides the times she planned on going out and having a one night stand), but she couldn't stand a single hair when she was in a spa.  
"Tarja?" Tuomas called after a while and he knocked. "What are you doing?"  
"Eh, I'm naked and removing unwanted hair from my body!" Tarja called back and Tuomas at the other side of the door chuckled.  
"There is a spa called Kustannus apis, they had a free room for two nights. I booked it from three o'clock, is that okay?"  
"Of course, I've never been there before," Tarja called back, smiling. "I'm done soon, okay? Looking forward."  
"Me too," Tuomas said, even though this was a little untrue. He didn't only look forward to it - he was afraid, nervous, and his heart was racing madly in await and joy.


	31. Chapter 31

Tuomas lost his voice as he saw her standing next to the shower, waiting for him. He first didn't recognise her, she had her back turned to the entrance of the spa and was currently doing her hair up.  
She was Tarja, even though the black-blue phoenix on her hip said something else.  
Tuomas noticed that he had never actually seen her backside before, only touched.  
He swallowed. "Tarja?"  
Tarja turned around and smiled at him. "Yes, honey?"  
Tuomas' gaze travelled down her body, hung at her breasts for a while, and travelled back up again. "You have a tattoo," he then said in surprise and Tarja giggled.  
"Like it?" she asked and Tuomas nodded.  
"Haven't seen it before, is that possible?"  
"You didn't fuck me from behind yet, so yes," Tarja said in a low and seductive voice and Tuomas laughed, pulling her close. He pecked her lips and whispered, "I haven't either fucked you normally yet."  
Tarja laughed and pulled him towards the pool.

They sank deeper into the water, bubbles all around them.  
It was already evening and they were alone in the whirlpool.  
Tuomas' hand moved over his Love's upper body, kneading her breasts gently.  
Tarja pulled her lips away and sunk them down on his shoulder, kissing it gently.  
His hands moved lower again and finally rested on his hips. Tarja pulled away again and looked at him.  
He smiled and she smiled back, her heart swelling because of the love she spotted in his eyes.  
She pulled her hands out of the water and cupped his face.  
"Why are you so perfect?" she whispered.  
"Why are you?" Tuomas asked with a light smile and Tarja laughed gently.  
She slung her arms around his neck and pressed her body against his.  
Tuomas hugged her back and closed his eyes. "Honestly, how?" he asked again and caressed her tattoo. "My little phoenix ... That you are."  
"Little?" Tarja giggled. "Hey, I'm not that little ..."  
"Still, you're my little phoenix", Tuomas repeated and pecked her lips.

At eleven they returned to their room. After having a few alcohol free cocktails at the pool bar, they had decided to go to bed.  
The room was beautiful and really new, and the view upon Helsinki was amazing.  
Tuomas embraced Tarja from behind as she looked out of the window.  
"Beautiful," he whispered and Tarja nodded.  
"I know," she sighed. "Helsinki is beautiful, but still I dream of -"  
"I meant you," Tuomas interrupted her and kissed her temple. "But tell me, what do you dream of?"  
"New York," Tarja answered. "Or London. Or Paris ..."  
"I'll definitely take you to Paris," he promised and Tarja turned around.  
"I love you," she said, her eyes glistening of tears. "And now let's take a shower."  
"Together?" Tuomas whispered, his eyes widening.  
"Together and naked," Tarja answered and reached behind herself to open her bikini top. "Its time for you to see me, hm?"  
Tuomas didn't reply, with a dry mouth he watched her pulling the ties of her top open. He carefully opened the bow behind her neck and pulled the top off her, his eyes growing wider.  
His hands were shaking as he caressed the sides of her breasts.  
Tarja laughed gently about his nervousness and brought her own hands up to his, showing him that he could squeeze harder. "It doesn't hurt, believe me," she said and Tuomas ran his fingertips along her delicate skin.  
Only the light from outside shone on her and for a moment Tuomas thought he was dreaming.  
"I'm touching my teacher's breasts," he mumbled and Tarja sighed.  
"Can we please forget that I'm your teacher? Please, Tuomas ... It really pulls me down, really."  
Tuomas nodded. "It doesn't pull me down, to be honest," he said. "It turns me on."  
"It's hot, yeah," Tarja said lowly. "And it's very forbidden."  
"That makes it even hotter," Tuomas said, his cheeks flushed. "Tarja ... If we shower together now -"  
"I hope so," Tarja said and Tuomas nodded.  
"Okay. I'm already apologising for ... Certain erections that might occur."  
Tarja looked at him for a moment, before she laughed. "Apologising?? For what, for getting a boner because of me?! Oh, Tuo, you don't even know how amazing it is for a woman to see a man getting a boner because of her!"  
Tuomas blushed more and Tarja sighed. "Okay, as soon as you'll start getting hard, I'll show you how wet I am."  
And with those words she literally jumped on her boyfriend and wrapped her legs around him as he caught her.  
She bent down and claimed his lips, while Tuomas carried her to the bathroom, his knees wobbly.  
And next thing he realised was, how the woman pulled down his boxer shorts and slowly kissed down his stomach, coming closer to his crotch.  
"W - wait," Tuomas breathed and Tarja stopped pulling at the boxers.  
"Yes?"  
"I'm afraid ..."  
His voice almost was inaudible and Tarja looked up to him. "Why? Look at me, I'm here in front of you, half naked already. You could force me to give you head, why are you afraid?"  
"Tarja ... No, I'd never force you to do that. But no one besides myself has ever seen me naked," he said. "Well, if you don't count the times I was a baby."  
"You're still a baby," Tarja giggled. "Mine. My baby."  
Tuomas sighed. "What I wanted to say - I'm afraid you won't like ... my body."  
"You're afraid I won't like your penis," Tarja stated and Tuomas looked away.  
"Yeah ... maybe I'm ... too small ..."  
"Oh, Tuo," Tarja sighed gently, calling him by his nickname again. "No, sweetie - size isn't everything. Look at me, do I have super big breasts?"  
"No, but they're perfect," Tuomas said and Tarja smiled.  
"See? And so are you, now down with the boxers."  
And she pulled.  
And stared.  
And looked back to him again. "Too small!? If this is small for you, what exactly is your imagination of huge??"  
"Let's just get inside," Tuomas muttered, his face deeply red.

Skin against skin.  
Their skins were wet as they collided and hands were roamed over the other's body. She sighed into his mouth, pressing her body against his more longing. He was so hard, his erection pressed against her inner thigh, but she didn't move. She knew he wasn't ready yet and of course she wouldn't force him. She needed it, her lower area throbbed so much it hurt, she needed him deeply inside her - but she respected his wish and didn't move.  
His hardness almost hurt. The throbbing killed him, the imagination of feeling her warm, wet walls around his shaft made him go crazy. He wondered what would happen if he'd just part her legs and plunge into her, but he didn't move. It would be too early!  
Well, they were already naked, kissing, fumbling, but this was enough for a while.  
Even though the longing took away his breath.  
But after minutes of kissing, touching and pressing their naked skins against each other, Tarja's hands suddenly travelled down.  
"Hey, phoenix," he moaned into her mouth as two slim hands started stroking his erection, and Tarja pulled away her lips from his.  
"Yes?" she panted, her hands gently closed around his boner.  
"Don't ... Don't do that if you don't want to", Tuomas pleaded, but to his amusement Tarja smiled.  
"But I want to ... And I want to do even more. Have you ever received a blowjob?"  
Tuomas' eyes widened quickly and his face went pale as he shook his head. He wasn't able to reply, was it possible? Was it possible that this perfect, wonderful, beautiful creature, his hellcat, his teacher, the devil in person (at school) wanted to give him what she just had asked him?  
And Tarja smiled slightly. "Do you want to receive one?"  
"Feel your lips around me?" Tuomas whispered hoarsely. "I can't imagine how it feels ... But yes, I so want to ..."  
"You can't even imagine?" Tarja asked gently. "Oh boy, I forgot you've never even had an orgasm before."  
"How embarrassing," Tuomas mumbled and looked away, but Tarja shook her head and pulled him down.  
"Not at all, my love. But tell me, you've never masturbated before?? How is that possible! I masturbate almost every day!"  
"Hot," Tuomas chuckled. "I really wanna watch you while you do it to yourself."  
"You will, don't worry", Tarja giggled and squeezed his hardness, what made him moan.  
"Please -" he started, but Tarja let go of him.  
"We should wait," she suddenly said. "See, I have the habit to speed up everything I have, especially relationships. And I'm really, really serious about this one, Tuomas. Is it okay for you to wait? I mean, I can give you a blowjob now -"  
"If you're okay with that as well, I'm okay with waiting," Tuomas answered but couldn't restrain himself from drawing down his fingers, grazing a sensitive spot of her lower region. "And now we're even," he whispered as she moaned loudly.

And that had been the start of their little game.  
Tarja stretched herself on the bed, her hair was still wet and this wasn't the only thing. Tuomas kissed every inch of her skin, well, it felt like it. Tarja couldn't remember a time where she had been aroused liked this, she simply couldn't bear it anymore. His lips and hands were practically everywhere, exploring her most sensitive parts, nipping and biting her flesh gently, leaving a hickey every now and then. Tarja moaned loudly when he started sucking on her breasts.  
"You see?" she panted. "You're my baby."  
"Which baby does things like that?" Tuomas countered and carefully inserted a finger into Tarja's warm wetness.  
"Oh god," Tarja whispered and closed her eyes. Almost automatically she parted her legs while Tuomas continued sucking at her nipples. But now his finger was slowly moving in and out of her, a nice sensation for Tarja, but not enough.  
"Tuomas ... I don't want to disappoint you, but this almost feels like nothing," she informed him after a while. "You can add a second finger or you could try it with your tongue ... If you want to."  
"I don't know how," Tuomas said softly and Tarja smiled.  
"It's easy to please a woman if you know how, believe me," she said and Tuomas raised his brow.  
"I don't even want to know where you know that from," he said and Tarja slapped his arm gently.  
"You're stupid. No, just try it. It'll be beautiful for both of us, I promise." Tarja smiled up to him and Tuomas pulled his index finger out of her. "I ... I can't," he whispered and stood up. "I'll wash my hands."  
"Okay," Tarja said gently and rolled herself to the side.  
Tuomas threw an apologetic look at her and his heart almost tore as he noticed her somehow sad and disappointed look.  
"I'll try to sleep," she said quietly and Tuomas nodded, walking to the bathroom. He had really wanted to wash his hands, was her juices off his finger, but then he swallowed.  
'I can't lose her only because I'm too immature for her,' he thought and within a second he had licked off her wetness of his finger.  
He closed his eyes.  
The taste was sweet and so different than everything he had ever tasted.  
He left the bathroom and looked at the gorgeous female on the bed, who currently had her eyes closed.  
He was so, so lucky.  
Without thinking about it for another second, he positioned himself at the foot end of the bed, parting her legs with fierce.  
"Tuo -?!" Tarja gasped, but Tuomas already had pressed his lips against her entry and surprised her with thrusting his tongue inside her without a warning.  
"Oh!" Tarja gasped and grabbed the wooden back rest. "Oh my -!"  
Her body got moved back and forth slowly as he moved against her, gave everything in making love to her with his mouth. Tarja remembered the text of Passion And The Opera while he was drinking.   
Drink from my thighs the rain of lies.  
Her breaths got faster as his love making did, as his tongue flickered over her clit as well as it was thrusting in and out of her.  
Tuomas couldn't even express the sensation of his erection, again his hard cock pressed so hard against the bed that it almost hurt. But he didn't stop, no, he sucked and thrust faster and when he noticed hat she was about to cum, he quickly replaced his tongue with his finger to watch her.  
And it was amazing.  
Her whole body was clenched, but as she screamed, her limbs loosened and crashed down on the bed. Her thighs and arms were twitching, though, and her mouth was widely opened. Her eyes were rolled up and Tuomas moved down to lick her dry.  
After Tarja had calmed down again, she pulled the young man up and rolled him on her back, trailing her kisses lower, wanting to give him an adequate payback for what he just had done to her.


	32. Chapter 32

"Tuomas?"  
Tuomas cursed himself as he stepped inside the living room. Why hadn't he managed to close the door quietly??  
"Yes?" he answered and looked at his shocked mother. "What?!"  
"You've been gone for almost five days!! Are you crazy?? I had no idea what to do!"  
Tuomas groaned. Yes, Tarja and him had spent five days together, after two nights at the spa they had spent two more nights at Tarja's home. They had played the piano and they had gone for walks or even runs (Tuomas was amazed by how fit his girlfriend was) and Tuomas had watched her while she was training her voice (which was very erotic to him), but they hadn't done more intimate things than touching, not as a few nights before.  
"I've been with my girlfriend," Tuomas told his mother. "I was safe."  
"That's what you say," Kirsti scolded. "I don't know your girlfriend so why would I not worry about you?"  
Tuomas rolled his eyes. "Mum ..."  
"Son," Kirsti interrupted him bitterly. "I demand to meet your girlfriend. And I want to know why you're keeping her a secret to me."  
"You will meet her soon." Tuomas promised and thought, 'And if not before the conference, then you'll meet her there.' "And you'll see why I kept her a secret."  
"No, tell me!" his mother said loudly.  
"Is she ugly?"  
"No, she's heavenly gorgeous and stunningly beautiful," Tuomas answered, proud of his choice of words.  
"Is she stupid?" Kirsti asked.  
"She's intelligent, intellectual and highly sophisticated," Tuomas answered seriously and his mother squinted her eyes at him.  
"Is she old?"  
Tuomas stared at his mother. "How old is 'old' for you?"  
"I don't know, forty? Not that forty is old but it's definitely too old for you. Okay, that was stupid, she isn't old. I know you ... Is she fat?"  
Tuomas laughed loudly. "Oh God, mum. Give yourself a break. She's not old and she's not fat, she's young, slim, has an amazing body, she's sporty and she's the most beautiful woman on earth - right after my wonderful mother."  
"You're a charmer but not charming enough to get my mind off her," Kirsti sighed. "Oh honey, I just want the best for you. What's her name? Talvi? Thea?"  
Tuomas groaned and went upstairs, laughing loudly about his mother.  
"It is Talvi," Kirsti mumbled to herself. "Or maybe it's no Finnish name at all? Oh, I need to know."  
And with those words she pulled out the book she had used daily during her pregnancies, the book that had more than 500 names in it, from all over the world. She opened it at "T" and started reading.

Tuomas came down ten minutes later, catching his mother studying the book that still hadn't gotten removed, even though she definitely didn't need it anymore.  
"Are you pregnant?" Tuomas joked, but as he got closer, he noticed that she was reading the names that started with a T. "You need a new hobby," he said and grabbed the book.  
"Tell me at least if her name is in this book!" Kirsti begged and while rolling his eyes, he flipped to the beginning of the T-chapter.  
"Yep," he answered and gave it back to her - closed of course. "The second letter is an A."  
"Thank you," Kirsti said. "It's Talvi. I'm sure!"  
Tuomas only sighed.

\---

Three weeks later

\---

"Tarja, sweetie, be so nice and get me another pill, will you?"  
Tarja pressed her lips together and opened the bottle. "Are you sure those are good for you?" she asked as she peeld out one of the poisonous looking red pills.  
Her mother rolled her emerald eyes. "The doctor prescribed them, right? They have to work." Marjatta Turunen coughed. "At least they - take away the pain," she panted and swallowed the pill.  
Tarja had to hold back her tears. Half a year ago her mother had gotten the information that she had cancer - breast cancer, and it wasn't curable anymore.  
"Hey," the dark haired woman whispered and took her daughter's hand.  
Tarja shook her head. "I can't believe it," she sobbed. "It's getting worse, do you think I don't notice that it's getting worse?? You'll die, mother ..."  
"I know," Marjatta said softly and squeezed the small hand of her daughter. "I know. And I will die happy, with the thought of my perfect, talented and beautiful daughter. I'm so proud of you, my love."  
Tarja buried her face in the blanket, quietly sobbing into the fabric, leaving it damp from her tears. "I don't want you to die ... Not now that I ... that I ..."  
"That you what?" Marjatta asked gently and stroke the younger woman's hair. "Are you pregnant?"  
Tarja lifted her head and smiled weakly. "No ... But maybe soon," she said and sat up again, taking her mother's hand in hers. "I have a boyfriend ... And this time it's serious."  
"I'm so happy for you," Marjatta said. "I hope you'll introduce him to us soon?"  
Tarja hesitated at first, but then she nodded. "Soon, Mum. If you feel healthy enough."  
"I have bad days, like today," Marjatta answered and coughed again. "But then again I have days when I feel no pain at all. At those days I can walk around and even cook."  
Tarja wiped away her tears.  
She couldn't believe that her mother was dying, her saviour in every way. "His ... His name is Tuomas," she sobbed, knowing that her mother needed nothing more than getting on other thoughts. "And - don't get hysteric, but he's only twenty-one."  
Tarja had always been honest with her mother, there was nothing that Marjatta didn't know, especially now that she was about to die any time.  
The elder woman said nothing, but she also didn't look shocked.  
"He's a carpenter," Tarja continued and Marjatta smiled (after all her husband was carpenter as well). "And - and now he's studying at my college ..."  
"So you're dating your student," Marjatta stated and Tarja nodded.  
"Were officially together for about a month now. I dearly love him, mother, and he loves me too."  
"And that's everything that's important, even though twenty-one is really a little young," Marjatta said seriously and studied her daughter's beautiful face over the edges of her glasses. "What about Oliver and you?"  
Tarja shook her head. "That's over. Last week he wanted sex again but I told him I had a boyfriend. I was so afraid he would ... force me again but then he just left ... and since then he ignores me. Hopefully forever."  
"That's great," Marjatta said quietly. "But I still think you should tell someone about what he did to you ..."  
"I told you, mother, it's okay. I'm fine."  
Marjatta coughed and Tarja wrapped her arms around the elder Finn.  
"I love you so much," she whispered and pressed the warm, chubby body of her mother against her slim figure. "I don't know what to do without you ..."  
"You'll become a singer," Marjatta whispered, while her eyes fluttered shut. "You'll marry and get beautiful babies and you'll get old happily. Now go and tell your father I'd like some pancakes in the evening."  
Tarja laughed weakly and kissed her mother's cheek. "I'll tell him," she promised and after her mother had fallen asleep, she tumbled out of the bedroom, right into the opened arms of her father.  
Teuvo had stopped crying months ago, he knew he had no right to show his weak side now. His beloved wife was dying, now he had to be there for her and their beautiful daughter.  
He weighed the crying girl in his arms, weighed her until she had stopped crying, told her everything would be alright.  
But he knew nothing would be alright, he knew that there was no chance that his wife would survive.

"Hello?"  
Tuomas got a shock as he heard his girlfriend's voice. "Sweetheart? Are you - are you crying?"  
At first Tarja didn't answer, but then Tuomas heard how she blew her nose.  
"I've been watching Titanic," Tarja lied. "Gets me every time. How are you, baby?"  
"Aww, that's cute," Tuomas laughed. "But you don't think that Leonardo DiCaprio is sexier than me, right?"  
"Well, I've never given Leonardo DiCaprio a blowjob but he's indeed very sexy," Tarja teased and Tuomas swallowed.  
Over the last weeks she had always been like this - suggestive. Sexy. Longing.  
And he had been only one thing:  
Untouchable.  
He wanted love, and though he knew that she loved him, he was afraid. He was still afraid that she'd compare him to her ex sex-partners and tell him he wasn't good enough.  
"I'm fine," Tuomas answered her question from before. "I was wondering if we could meet."  
"Now?" Tarja hesitated. She had cried the whole drive from her parent's house to her flat and she hadn't stopped crying after coming come for an hour. "I don't know, honey, I'm still so done because of Titanic."  
"It's okay, we can meet tomorrow as well," Tuomas offered. "There's a restaurant in Helsinki I wanted to invite you. It's called OLO, do you know it?"  
"Yeah," Tarja said and wiped her hands over her burning eyes. "I've been there with Oliver plenty of times."  
Tuomas didn't answer first, but then he said quietly, "Okay, no OLO."  
"Can't we go to a spa again?" Tarja asked. "Come over now. I need to get on other thoughts."

Said, done.  
Two hours later Tuomas rang the doorbell of his beloved, but as the young woman opened the door, his smile froze.  
He immediately got that they wouldn't drive to a spa as he looked right into his girlfriend's red and swollen eyes.  
"Tuo," she whispered and pulled him inside and in a hug. "Sorry. I'm so sorry, I can't go."  
"It's okay, dear," Tuomas said and hugged her tighter. "What is it, Love? I doubt it's because of Titanic."  
"It's not," Tarja sobbed. "Sorry. I have to tell you something."  
She led her beloved to the couch and a few minutes later they were cuddling, Tarja's head resting on his chest comfortably, while his fingers caressed her hair.  
"Tell me, sweetheart ..."  
Tarja closed her eyes, enjoying his fingers playing with her hair. "I ... Today I visited my parents."  
"Oh," Tuomas said. "Did you tell them about us?"  
"I did," Tarja said and Tuomas inhaled sharply. "No, they are okay with us" Tarja said gently and cupped his face. "I told them you're my student and they said, all that counts is that we love each other. They want to meet you as soon as possible ... and the way it looks right now, I should really introduce you soon ..."  
"Tarja, I don't get it," Tuomas said. "Why are you suddenly changing your mind about me meeting your parents?"  
"Because," Tarja whispered. "Because my mother is dying ..."  
Tuomas covered his mouth with his hand as his girlfriend buried her face in his chest, sobbing quietly.  
"Oh God ... I'm so sorry," he whispered and kissed the top of her head. "I didn't know ..."  
"And I didn't know it was so bad," Tarja whispered and looked up to him. "Today I saw that it was ... She has to take so many different medications and she sleeps the whole day ... Her good days are getting rarer and Daddy says at some days she doesn't even stand up ..."  
"What does she have?" Tuomas asked gently and Tarja closed her eyes.  
"Breast cancer. She says she doesn't know where from but ... she has been a smoker for thirty-five years. I know it comes from there, even though she says it can't be."  
Tuomas pulled her close and kissed her forehead. "I'm so sorry," he said again and Tarja sniffed quietly.  
"It's okay. But when I saw her today I just lost it ... Around Christmas time she was okay but now it's going down. And my father, he acts so strong ... But I know, once my mum is ... dead ... he will feel useless. My father lived to make her happy. And now that I have you ..."  
Tuomas felt awful.  
Once again he felt what it meant to have an older girlfriend - it meant that her parents were a lot older than his parents as well. Sure, it didn't have to mean that her mother had cancer because she was older than his parents, but truth be told - Tuomas had never asked himself before if his parents would die soon and how.  
"For how long does she have cancer already?" Tuomas mumbled and Tarja sighed.  
"That's a complicated subject, because she already carries the illness around for ten years. She had never had a check up, so she went half a year ago, when she suddenly felt the pain ... Since then she knows. If she only went to the doctor about five years ago ..."  
"If God wants it that way," Tuomas said gently and Tarja laughed quietly.  
"I'm not a believer. Especially not after ... you know. Everything that happened to me."  
"I'm sorry," Tuomas mumbled, but Tarja didn't reply.  
They went to bed at half past nine, but they both weren't in mood for more than kissing each other gently before Tuomas spooned his girlfriend and both drifted to a light and not that good sleep.


	33. Chapter 33

This time she looked awful.  
The bags under her eyes were dark and huge, her eyes were still swollen and her face was pale.  
She stared at the ceiling, not moving a finger.  
Tuomas smiled as he saw that his beloved was awake, even though she looked horrible.  
"Morning," he said gently and placed the tray on the bed. "I've made a little something for you ..."  
Tarja's empty eyes fell on the tray and now she smiled.  
He had honeslty made a heart-shaped fried egg. And, if that wasn't enough, he had drawn a heart into the coffee with milk froth - or tried to. It wasn't beautiful but it was meant to be a heart.  
"Awww," Tarja said and sat up. "How cheesy."  
"Everything for my beauty and my Love," Tuomas said and put the tray on his girlfriend's lap. "How are you, gorgeous?"  
"Stop that, I know I look horrible!" Tarja groaned, but Tuomas shook his head.  
"For me you don't. And besides that, I've seen worse. My grandma in a bikini, for example."  
Tarja started laughing. "Oh gosh. I hope she didn't wear a G-string!"  
Tuomas grimaced and Tarja laughed more, which made Tuomas smile. Now she looked happy again.

While Tarja was eating her breakfast, Tuomas decided to do something good for his girlfriend and informed her that he would do the laundry for her. Tarja was surprised at first, surprised and amazed.  
She thanked him a little startled and her heart jumped as he gave her a loving smile.  
'Wow, he's really something else,' she thought. 'I will never let him go, definitely not.'  
She heard him whistling Ever Dream while he pulled her clothes out of the laundry basket.  
"I'll be back soon," he called and slammed the door shut, leaving Tarja alone in a quiet room.  
And she immediately missed him.  
After a minute, she stood up and walked into the bathroom, grabbing one of his shirts and smelling at it.  
A few seconds later she was wearing it over her naked upper body.  
With a satisfied smile she walked into the living room and reached to the phone, dialling an all to well known number.  
"Turunen?"  
"It's me, Dad. How is mother doing?"  
"She's better than yesterday," Teuvo answered. "She's on the couch, wanna talk to her?"  
"Not now," Tarja answered. "Tuomas and I will come over later."  
"Wait, you want to introduce your boyfriend to us?" Teuvo gasped. "Tarja - I'm honoured. How did we deserve that?"  
"You're stupid." Tarja rolled her eyes. "I swear, if you embarrass me ..."  
"Come on, kid," Teuvo said. "You know we aren't embarrassing."  
Tarja could hear her mother shout "Exactly!" in the background and she sighed.  
"We'll come over for lunch," she announced and hung up.

Tuomas put the laundry in an empty washing machine and looked at the buttons.  
'Forty minutes, meanwhile I can go and buy some groceries,' he decided and pushed the right button, shortly before someone entered.  
"Good morning!" a surprised voice said and Tuomas turned around, spotting an elder woman.  
"Good morning ma'am," he said politely and offered the lady his hand.  
She took it. "Did you move in here?" the woman asked with a Swedish accent. "I've never seen you before!"  
"I didn't move in, ma'am, I'm Miss Turunen's boyfriend," Tuomas answered and the woman nodded.  
"Finally she has someone nice. Her other boyfriend always ignored me, that dark blonde. You know, I've known Tarja since she moved in here, such a beautiful and talented woman, but she just didn't have the right taste in men. Until now, so it seems. So, sweetheart, do you want some cookies?"

Tuomas returned fifty minutes later, a bag of groceries, the wet clothes he'd hang up later and a few cookies in his hands.  
As soon as she heard the door close, Tarja shouted,  
"Did you meet Mrs Strand?"  
"I did and now I'm feeling as if someone asked me a hole in my stomach -"  
Tuomas went quiet when he spotted the most beautiful woman existing, lying on her bed, wearing one of his shirts - the one with the Metallica logo.  
"Damn, you're sexy," he breathed. Why wasn't he able to shut his mouth??  
"I'm only here for you," the woman purred and leaned back. "Do whatever you want to do."  
Tuomas noticed how his erection had grown within a second, now it was pressing against his jeans so hard that it hurt already. He took a step forward and placed the groceries and the laundry on the floor.

Only a few minutes later she was completely naked, the shirt was somewhere on the floor, Tuomas had dropped it carelessly.  
Her hands were entwined with his hair, only his hair was visible, while his face was buried between her thighs.  
Her moans, sighs and soft screams seemed so desperate, he knew she wanted to let go, wanted to scream, and he wanted nothing more than taking her again and again until both of them were too exhausted.  
One day he'd do that, of that he was sure. He'd take her to his island again and love her all night long.  
But right now he had to live with the fact that he could 'only' drink from her thighs.  
Tarja wrapped her legs around her boyfriend's thin body while her hands wandered to her own breasts. His hands were busy with parting her legs as wide as possible, so she had to pleasure herself upwards. She kneaded her breasts and squeezed her nipples, moaning louder, panting faster, whispering his name over and over.  
Later she came with a scream, a scream that got silenced by the pillow she had pressed on her face.  
Tuomas smiled when he was done.  
He wiped his wet beard into the shirt from the floor and looked at the naked woman on the bed.  
She had put the pillow away and now looked at him with a sultry expression in her face.  
Tuomas looked at the woman, observed her from her head to her toes, his eyes bathing in the beauty of her nakedness ...  
And with a shock he realised that this creature was his teacher.  
It was no imagination, it was real. She was his teacher.  
Panicking he stepped back.  
This was illegal, this was illegal as it could be.  
Tarja's smile froze. "Tuo?"  
"Tarja -" he said and shook his head. "I'm sorry - I'm sorry. I just had a panic attack."  
"I know how panic attacks look and this was more like an attack of unsureness," Tarja commented with her eyes narrowed at him, a sad expression on her face. "You don't want me to take your virginity, am I right? I'm too old in your eyes."  
"What?" Tuomas asked shocked. "No, Tarja. I told you, I don't care about your age. I wouldn't even care if you were forty, it's just ..." Tuomas took a breath and stared at a spot beneath her naked body. "You're my teacher ... And the realisation that I'm ... I'm looking at my teacher, and she's all naked and ready for me ... It was just too much for me right now."  
"Oh," Tarja said quietly and pulled the blanket over her body. "Does it disturb you that I'm your teacher?"  
"No," Tuomas immediately said. "I mean - I fell in love with you, right? Despite you being my teacher. But still, somehow it's ... strange. Tomorrow's Monday and you'll be behind the teacher's desk again while I will be in front of you, pretending to be able listening to you while I just stare at your moving lips, wishing I could kiss them ..." Tuomas blushed slightly. "I love you, Tarja, but it's not easy having you as my teacher."  
Tarja looked at Tuomas sadly as he had ended. "It's not easy for me to have you as a student," she said softly and got up, making the blanket fall down from her torso, leaving her completely naked once again. She stood up and walked to him, taking his hand. "It's really early for that now but I've already thought of retiring."  
"What?" Tuomas asked and Tarja quickly put her hand on his mouth.  
"The Sibelius would take me back anytime - if our relationship is going to last, I'll go back there. I wouldn't be you teacher anymore. What do you think of that?"  
"It would be horrible because I want to see you as often as possible," Tuomas admitted. "But somehow it would also be great, because I would ... I would know that you'd wait for me at home and I could look forward to see my girlfriend while I'm in school."  
"Exactly," Tarja sighed and pecked his lips. Then she cupped his face and locked their eyes. "Let's see how this develops, hm? You've told me you want to stay with me, but let's wait. If this with us is still a topic or getting more serious - which I hope - by the end of May, I'll call the headmaster of the Sibelius and ask him to take me back for the next year. What do you think?"  
"That sounds good," Tuomas said gently and rubbed his nose against hers. "I love you."  
"I love you too," Tarja whispered. "And for today I've planned a very special way to show you how much I love you," she said and winked at him.

The way of showing him how much she loved him turned out to be an introducing to her parents.  
Tuomas was shaking madly as she opened the door, led him inside and closed it again, calling for her father.  
Teuvo Turunen had gray hair, which shocked Tuomas a little. He knew that his girlfriend's parents were older than his, but this man could easily be his grandfather as well!  
"Hello, lad," Teuvo said and offered Tuomas his hand, who took it a little shy. "So you're the pal who makes my daughter so happy."  
"Apparently," Tuomas answered softly and Teuvo laughed.  
"When Tari told us you were only twenty-one, I imagined you to be small and boyish. But you look older than you are." The elder man turned to his daughter and nudged her arm. "You scared me to death for a moment, Tarja. The age difference isn't even visible! Besides that, when you smile like that, you look five years younger."  
Tarja was indeed smiling, beaming madly as her father seemed to approve their relationship.  
"How is mum?" she asked and slipped her hand into Tuomas', who squeezed it.  
"She's alright, sweetheart," Teuvo answered and smiled at the couple. "She's in the living room, reading a book."  
Tarja took a breath and pulled Tuomas towards the living room.  
"Mother?" she called. "We're here!"  
Marjatta Turunen was the complete opposite of her husband, well, at least concerning her hair. It was flaming red - obviously dyed - and she looked a lot younger than her husband.  
But she looked ill.  
Tuomas' heart clenched.  
She looked very ill.  
The bags under her eyes were horrendous, her face was pale and thin, her whole body was. She wasn't slim, she was thin like an ill person was.  
"Hi Mommy," Tarja whispered and Tuomas could hear how it pained her to look at her mother. The black haired woman bent down to hug her mother, Tuomas observed her careful hug on the elder woman. As she pulled away, she turned her head and looked up to Tuomas, whose heart clenched again as he saw his love close to tears. "This is Tuomas, Mum," she said and smiled, "My boyfriend."  
"I'm Marjatta," Tarja's mother answered with a hoarse voice and smiled at him, before she offered him her hand as well. Tuomas took it, shocked by how weak and ill her handshake felt. "Thank you for making my daughter so happy."  
"It's a pleasure, Mrs Turunen," Tuomas said politely and Teuvo behind him laughed.  
"You can call us Teuvo and Marjatta, lad," he said and Tuomas smiled thankfully.  
Tarja grabbed his hand again. "I'll show him around," she said and pulled him away from the living room.  
She showed him around the house she had spent twelve years of her life before she had moved into a flat with Noel. She didn't say much, only things that were necessary, like, "The bathroom, my brother Toni's room, ..."  
And then they entered a smaller, quite girly room and Tarja closed the door. "My old room," she whispered before she leaned herself against Tuomas and started crying again. "She's so ill," she cried. "She's going to die ... I - I don't want her to die! If she dies, I'll ... Tuomas, she's my best friend!"  
Tuomas led his girlfriend over to her old bed and placed her on it gently. He lay down next to her and hugged her close.  
"She won't die," he promised her while Tarja left his shirt soaking wet. He hugged her even closer. "I know you don't believe in God, but I'll pray for your mother. I love you and you don't deserve this. Your mother will be okay."  
Tarja nodded and looked up to him, still shaking.  
She didn't tell him, but she knew her mother wouldn't be okay.


	34. Chapter 34

Two weeks went by without an important incident and soon the date was there, the feared date. February sixteenth.  
Tarja and Tuomas had spent Valentine's day together, of course. They had made a picnic in the park next to Tarja's flat and they had spent the night in another spa. Nothing had happened, and Tuomas hadn't even tried to let more happen. Even though Tarja was thinking he didn't want to sleep with her, she had to remind herself that they'd been a couple for only one and a half months now and he still was a virgin after all. And she was ten years older after all.  
Tuomas had visited her everyday after school, no matter if she had been at work that day or not. And sometimes he spent the night with her.  
But then it was Monday, February sixteenth, and, eager to soon know their son's teachers, Kirsti and Pentti Holopainen were on their way to Helsinki, a completely nervous Tuomas in the backseat of their car.

Meanwhile Tarja Turunen was nervous as well, not only she would meet her boyfriend's parents - she was about to meet one of the most successful female pianists in the south of Finland!  
For the teacher-parents conference she never wore a short skirt, she usually always paid attention to dress properly once the parents were about to find out who was teaching their kids.  
And when Tuomas came in, his parents behind him, Tarja crossed her fingers.  
Everything had to go well, it just had to.  
"Mother, father, that's my Music teacher," Tuomas announced his parents.  
"Tarja Turunen, what an honour," Tarja introduced herself and they shook hands.  
Tarja asked Tuomas and his parents to sit down and then she started talking.  
"Well, I must admit I'm simply stunned, Mr and Mrs Holopainen. Tuomas is very talented and very smart, he's without a doubt my best student."  
"He is?" Kirsti asked surprised and looked at Tuomas. "You've never been that good in school as you are now! Your other teacher also told us how smart you were and even your maths teacher said you could be the best if you studied more for maths. And I thought you didn't want to go here."  
Tuomas blushed a little. "Well, I wanted to be good," he mumbled and Tarja let out a "Tsktsktsk"-sound.  
"That's nothing to be ashamed of," she said cheerfully. "He has a lot of potential. The way he writes his poems - I admit, whenever I come to correct his poems, I prepare myself a translator." She laughed and Kirsti squinted her eyes at her.  
"Poems?" she asked. "Tuomas, since when do you write poems?"  
"Those poems are more like songs," Tuomas muttered and now Tarja's cheeks went red.  
"True," she said quickly. "He writes in English and Finnish and I've never read better songs before. His band can be proud of him."  
"You know about Nightwish?" Kirsti asked and Tarja shook her head quickly - too quickly.  
"Oh no, of course not, Mrs Holopainen. I meant his school band for the music festival - do you have another band, Tuomas?"  
"Outside the school, yeah," Tuomas answered. "Nightwish."  
Tarja nodded approvingly, not showing his parents that she already knew about Nightwish.  
"I bet you're the keyboard player?" Tarja asked on and Tuomas nodded.  
"Astounding," Tarja said. "Your son is really astounding, Mr and Mrs Holopainen."  
"Yes, we know that," Pentti answered and nudged his son's arm. "Glad he finally found something that interests him."  
"Or someone," Kirsti mumbled and Tarja smiled at her.  
"Pardon?"  
Kirsti smiled back. "Nothing. Is there anything else you wanted to tell us?"  
"Let's see, you know he's my best student, he has potential ... No, that was everything. He's clearly a model student."  
Kirsti stood up. "Thank you, Miss - sorry, what was your name again?"  
Tarja stood up as well and circled the desk, showing Tuomas and his parents that she was wearing high heels. She was so small ... Tuomas smiled softly.  
"Turunen," she answered and Kirsti and her shook hands. "Tarja Turunen."

After meeting Mr Jokinen, who was also very fond of Tuomas (but not the other way round), they drove back to the highway.  
"And?" Tuomas asked nervously. "Do you like my teachers?"  
"Oh, I don't know," Kirsti asked a little uncomfortably. "I liked your English teacher."  
"I liked your music teacher," Pentti commented and Kirsti laughed.  
"I know you did. A little more of this cut out and I could have seen her bra."  
Tuomas bit his lip. Uh oh ...  
"I thought of her competence as a teacher," Pentti said almost icily and Tuomas closed his eyes. He had to tell them about their love ...  
"Her competence can't be that good if she runs around with a cut out that reaches down to her navel!" Kirsti barked and suddenly Tuomas had enough.  
"That's it! Stop! She's an amazing teacher and I assure you, she usually dresses completely normal!" he shouted and Kirsti looked back to him.  
"I'm not stupid," she said calmly, but her eyes threatened to kill him. "She is T, isn't she?"  
For a few seconds it was completely quiet in the car.  
Pentti drove to a parking lot and stopped the car, now looking back at his son as well.  
"I also think so," he agreed with his wife.  
"What if she was?" Tuomas whispered and his mother gasped.  
"No! We'll take you from the university!"  
"You can't," Tuomas said calmly. "I'm adult, it's alone my decision where to study. Besides that - Tarja and I are a couple already. We'd go on with meeting each other, no matter in which school I was."  
"We have to tell the headmaster," Pentti suggested.  
"And the police," Kirsti hissed, "That's child abuse!"  
"Don't you dare!" Tuomas screamed. "I'm adult and she's the woman I love, she's the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with! Mum! Dad! Please! Please understand me! I need her ..." Tuomas buried his face in his hands, sobbing madly. "Please ... She's the love of my life ... Don't take her away from me ..."  
Kirsti and Pentti exchanged a regretful look.  
"Tuomas," Kirsti then started. "I'm sorry but I can't accept this. She's how much older than you?"  
"Nine years," Tuomas mumbled and looked at his parents. "But I don't care. And she also doesn't. Dad -"  
"Do you sleep with her?" Kirsti asked before Pentti could say something and Tuomas went pale.  
"What?"  
"Do you sleep with her?" Kirsti repeated calmly and Tuomas stared at his mother.  
"If I - mother, that's none of your business, honestly!" He said and glared at his parents.  
"She's nine years older than you!" Kirsti called. "You can't sleep with a woman who's nine years older than you!!"  
"That is my business, mine!" Tuomas almost screamed. "She's my girlfriend! Of course we sleep which each other!"  
Now both Kirsti and Pentti were pale.  
"Tuomas," the elder man tried to calm his son, "please listen. Tuo, she's so much older than you. She has so much more experience and one day she will let you fall like a hot potato, for a man who's in her age. We only want the best for you, Tuo."  
"But she is the best for me," Tuomas mumbled. "I love her. Please ..."  
Kirsti closed her eyes. "Let's drive home and talk."  
"No," Tuomas said stubbornly, "now or never."  
"Tuomas!" Kirsti said impatiently. "Don't be such a baby and listen to us."  
"How dare you call me a baby," Tuomas hissed and Pentti looks at him coldly.  
"I'm sorry but your mother is right. Compared to your girlfriend you are a baby."  
"I'm so done with you," Tuomas said icily and without another warning he opened the car door and got out quickly. Swallowing down his tears, he ran over the street and jumped into the bus which was currently standing at the bus stop at the opposite of the street.  
He didn't care where the bus was driving to.

Almost two hours later Tarja came home from university and found a sleeping Tuomas in front of her flat.  
"Tuo?" she asked shocked and knelt down, shaking him gently. "Hey, darling. What are you doing here?"  
"I was waiting for you," Tuomas mumbled as he opened his eyes. He looked done and very tired.  
"You'll get a key for my flat," Tarja promised as she opened the door and led her boyfriend inside. "Now tell me, baby ... What happened?"  
"My parents know about us," Tuomas whispered and sunk down on the couch.  
"Oh no," Tarja said quietly and stroke his cheek. "They don't accept us?"  
"They don't." Tuomas breathed and Tarja put her finger under his chin, lifting it up.  
"Was it that bad?" she asked gently and Tuomas nodded.  
"They hate our age difference ... The fact I love you ... They say you'd soon drop me for another man ..."  
"I'd never do that!" Tarja assured him and cupped his face. "I'd never! Do that! Heard me?"  
Tuomas nodded, but as he was about to say something, Tarja shut him with a kiss.

She was beneath him.  
Her body was sweaty and so was his, he was breathing madly as he roamed his hands over her skin.  
This time it was different.  
They had done it before but this time it was more serious. It felt more serious.  
His erection was pressing against her thigh and she carefully reached down. "Condom?" she whispered, wanting to let him choose if he was ready.  
"Yes," Tuomas whispered back and brought his lips down on hers.  
She played with his hair, made it fall down and build a curtain around her face, while Tuomas desperately tried to reach the drawer of her nightstand.  
Instead of condoms he found the vibrator, and without hesitating, he switched it on and pushed it inside her.  
Tarja gasped and parted her legs even more. "That's not - fair," she breathed, while Tuomas slowly took her with the black vibrator, his finger massaging her swollen bundle of nerves.  
"Why wouldn't that be fair, love?" Tuomas asked gently and kissed her earlobe. "I know enough about women to know how to please them."  
"You cheat, you aren't a virgin," Tarja gasped and arched her back, the thrusts he created with the vibrator were taking her mind.  
"I am, to one hundred percent," Tuomas promised and thrust harder. His manhood stood against her thigh and the throbbing was almost killing him. Yet he knew he had to make her cum first, he knew it wasn't easy to please a woman. And he needed it, he needed to please her as much as he needed to be pleased.  
With his free hand he grabbed her right breast and kneaded carefully, not wanting to hurt her. Tarja cried out in enjoying pain, her hips bucking up to meet his trusts. And when he felt she was close (due to the fact her walls grew tight, it got harder for him to thrust the vibrator inside her), and her eyes rolled up, he replaced his hand with hers, making her to thrust the vibrator into herself on her own. She did and Tuomas sat up, watching her masturbating.  
He had never seen something more erotic.  
His mouth hung open.  
There she was, his teacher, his girlfriend, the love of his life - naked, masturbating, and totally ready to get laid by him.  
He reached into the drawer once again and pulled out a little, red package, swallowing hard. He had practised it, but ...  
"Tuomas, I need you," Tarja whispered desperately while she plunged the vibrator into herself.  
Tuomas ripped open the package with shaking hands and while he watched his teacher (girlfriend!) arch her back, trying to cum.  
He looked down and though his hands were still shaking, he somehow managed to roll the condom (which surprisingly fitted on his cock - had she bought larger ones?) over his manhood.  
And within the next second he had grabbed her hand and pulled the vibrator out of her.  
It made an ugly sound as the plastic thing met the floor, but none of the Finns could care less.  
Tuomas pushed her down on the bed, parted her legs and looked at her.  
She was so beautiful.  
"What are you waiting for?" Tarja asked and pulled him down, claiming his lips in a searing kiss. He still felt unsure, but her skilled hands guided him, she reached down and grasped his penis, making sure the condom had been put on correctly - and as she felt that he had, she reached back, put her hands on his butt cheeks and pulled him against her, pushing her pelvis up at the same time.  
And the two became one.


	35. Chapter 35

Tuomas had heard of 'first times'. First times weren't perfect, first times were complicated, first times were unenjoyable, first times were nothing worth to remember.  
After his first time with Tarja he had to say that this wasn't true. At least for him. It probably depended on who your love making partner was, but already after his first time he had to say, he had never experienced something more beautiful than making love to Tarja Turunen.  
After his second time with her - which happened in exactly the same night as their first time -, he was sure that he would marry her one day.  
Their love making lasted hours, the whole night, it wasn't over after two times. Package after package landed on the floor and Tuomas was surprised by how she still turned him on after so many times.  
After their third time she collapsed on his body and cupped his face. "Once again?" she whispered and with a chuckle he rolled her over.

Tarja had heard of love making.  
Love making was more than sex, feelings were involved, love, lots of love. Hearts should be involved and for years Tarja had imagined the first time someone would make love to her, not just fuck her brain out of her.  
For years she had imagined it, yet she hadn't imagine it to be like this. So perfect!  
It felt better than she had thought. Way better.  
She snuggled against her partner, sighing happily.  
"I love you," she whispered and Tuomas pressed his lips on her forehead.  
"You're perfect," he growled quietly and Tarja hugged him, grinning into his skin.  
She hadn't counted how often they had made love that night, but she knew - she had never felt more alive. Never had she felt younger. Never had she felt more loved than now ...

Tuomas slipped out of the bed, quietly, not to wake his beloved.  
He suppressed a curse when he noticed that his private parts felt sore.  
He chuckled when his eyes fell on the opened packages on the floor - he counted five packages and five used condoms.  
Five!  
He quickly picked them up from the floor and walked into the bathroom to throw them away. He dressed and prepared her breakfast, as he did every morning. But when he was about to leave the flat for college, he sighed.  
No.  
He couldn't leave now ...  
After some time of thinking he tiptoed back into the bedroom and watched the peacefully slumbering woman.  
He loved her so much.  
He slipped out of his clothes again and crawled back into the bed.  
"Tuo?" Tarja mumbled and Tuomas pecked her lips.  
"College can wait, I have to be with my beautiful woman," Tuomas whispered and pulled her against him.  
"How often did we do it?" Tarja asked with a yawn and Tuomas chuckled.  
"Five times," he answered and Tarja groaned.  
"That's why my privates feel as if I've gotten a baby! Damn, it hurts ... Five times! I've never had sex for more than two times in one night."  
"May I correct you?" Tuomas asked gently and kissed her nose. "It was love making."  
"Indeed," said Tarja and hugged him. "Now shut up, let's cuddle and talk about the fact that you lost your virginity last night."  
Tuomas chuckled and soon their conversation ended in another love making session.

He didn't drive to college that day.   
They spent the day travelling between the bedroom and kitchen, none of them wearing more than a shirt (Tarja wore one of his).  
Tuomas pinned his beloved against the kitchen counter while she wanted to cook. He pushed his hands between her thighs and travelled it upwards, soon meeting her wet pussy. "Let's order something," Tuomas moaned and inserted his thumb. "Later, I'm not hungry anyway. And if I was ..." He pushed his thumb into her hole and she threw back her head, moaning "God, yes!"  
She wrapped one leg around his hip and Tuomas took her with his fingers, right there in the kitchen, against the kitchen counter.  
She moved her hips against his hand, helping him with taking her, until she couldn't bear it anymore. She grabbed the fabric of his shirt (the shirt he was wearing) and cried out in pleasure.  
"Gosh, Tuo!" she screamed, followed by a deep moan. Tuomas pulled out his fingers and grabbed her waist, lifting her up on the counter. Before she could protest, he had parted her legs and covered her dampness with his mouth. He parted her lips with his fingers and inserted his tongue deeply, lapping at her wet walls. Soon she clenched around his tongue, she let herself fall back, and the second her back crashed on the counter, she tumbled over the edge with a pleased scream on her lips.  
While he pulled away and wiped his mouth, he watched her cum, admired her twitching limbs and rolling eyes while her hands searched for him blindly.  
"Tuo ... Baby ..." she moaned. "I need you - want you - now!"  
"Yes, Miss Turunen," Tuomas said and obliged her wish, grabbing the pack of condoms anew. They always carried it through the flat, in case they'd need it. Like now.  
He plunged himself between her thighs roughly.  
This time it was fast and full of passion, he pushed against her, making her back arch on the counter.  
"God!" she screamed and grabbed his collar, pulling herself up. Their upper bodies collided and Tarja pulled the shirt off of him, throwing it carelessly to the floor. She moved her hips against his, grabbed his hair, pulled him against her. With his help she threw away the shirt she was wearing and soon he started sucking her skin, he kissed along her collarbone, captured her throat and sucked.  
Tarja threw her head back again and wrapped her arms around her beloved's neck, he grazed her skin with his teeth, moaned into her skin, pushed against her with fast moves.  
"Tuo -!" Tarja screamed, not able to say more than his name. "Have me - have me ...!"  
"I'm - I'm -," Tuomas groaned into her skin. "I'm close, Love ... Let go, I want you to cum first, please ..."  
"Alright," Tarja whimpered. "Wait ... Carry me to the couch ..."  
Tuomas did what she said, while she tightened her hug on him, he tumbled to the couch, their bodies still joint.  
He sat down on the couch and she pushed him back, scratching his chest by digging her nails into his skin. She was straddling him and now moving up and down his length, slowly at first, but then she got faster. Her nails left crescent marks all over his body, well, everywhere she could reach with her hands.  
She bent forth and now her nipples were touching his, gently caressing his with moving up and down.  
"That's it," Tarja sighed when she felt that this was obviously the right position. She hugged him and kissed his earlobe, took it between her teeth and pulled on it with a moan. His hands moved to her buttocks and helped her with moving up and down.  
"That's it ..." he agreed gently, before her body crashed down on his and her head fell on his shoulders and she cried out her relief into his hair. Tuomas wrapped his arms around her and came with a loud moan, hugging her even tighter.  
He would never let her go again, she was his now. For the eighth time now she was his.  
Tarja crawled off him wordlessly and pulled the condom off to throw it away. As she came back from the kitchen, he had his eyes closed. Tarja smiled and sat down on his lap.  
"I'm so happy you're older than me," Tuomas said and Tarja chuckled.  
"You think it's my age that makes me like that?"  
"I don't know," Tuomas answered. "But I think it is. You're way more experienced, this way you know countless different positions. I mean, I've never thought that love making from behind could be enjoyable for a woman -"  
"It's one of my favourite positions," Tarja said casually and took his hand in hers. "It's so comfy." Tuomas smiled.  
"And the fact you've already had countless times of love making makes you so good in bed ... So wild ..."  
"Hey, you're also wild and good in bed," Tarja said gently and pecked his lips. "You're the best lover I've ever had. You know why? Because you love me and I love you. The others - none of them loved me. But you do ..."  
"So very," Tuomas agreed quietly. "You know, for some time I was afraid I'd end up alone because you didn't like me back. I was so depressed because I loved you so much ..." He smiled at her loving look upon his face.  
"I always thought the same about you," she said gently and put her hand beneath his chin, lifting it up to make him look at her. "I thought you'd never love me, I thought, how could any student ever love a teacher? I know, I've heard about those relationships, but I've never thought it would happen to me ... That a student loved his teacher, not only adored her but loved."  
"Well, I love you," Tuomas said and cupped her face. "And I seriously could make love to you all day long."  
"Then why don't you do it?" Tarja whispered and brushed her lips against his, capturing his lower lip to suck on it.   
They were still naked, and her sweaty skin against his made him already go crazy again.  
He pushed a strand of her hear behind her ear.  
"I will, my Love," he whispered as she let go of his lip. "Don't you worry about that. I won't let you ever forget this day."  
"I won't forget either this day nor last night, even if you stopped now," Tarja said gently and cupped his face. "Never."

The rest of the day they mainly talked.  
They talked about their future, both admitted to the other that they wanted to stay together. They talked about Tuomas' parents, about what they'd do if they really wouldn't accept Tarja as Tuomas' girlfriend. Tarja told him again that she wanted to change the college. She had already written the resignment and would give it to the principal soon.  
They talked about Tuomas' sister, Tuomas asked her with trembling hands if she wanted to escort him to Susanna's wedding. Tarja smiled, took his hands and told him she would love to be his escort.  
They talked about upcoming events, the 'music festival' in front of all, and they talked about their future again.  
"Move in with me," Tarja whispered and caressed his long hair. "There is only one thing that's missing in this apartment and that's you."  
Tuomas nodded, dully. He pushed her hair behind her ears and nodded again. "Yes. I want to move in, especially after -"  
"That day?" Tarja chuckled.  
"That too," Tuomas laughed. "But especially after that incident with my parents. I don't ever want to see them again."  
"Oh, darling," Tarja said gently and kissed him. "You will see them again. And you'll see, they will accept me after I've changed school."  
"I don't know," Tuomas now admitted. "Mother wasn't quite pleased that I sleep with a ten years older woman."  
"Oh geez, they can be happy that I'm not ten years younger than you!" she snorted and Tuomas laughed.  
"Oh gosh, please stop."  
After they had talked about Tarja's childhood a little more, the parts she could remember, she stood up and walked over to the big bookshelf in the living room. She pulled out a big photo album and together they looked at it.  
"You were gorgeous," Tuomas breathed and stroke over the picture of a one year old, laughing baby Tarja.  
"I was ugly," Tarja sighed. "Here I look quite okay ..."  
"Okay?" Tuomas asked and stared at the almost five year old Tarja. "I can tell you've been the most beautiful kid at your kindergarten."  
"You're so stupid," Tarja said and then they looked at the pictures that Tarja hated the most - when she was 12 upwards.  
The pictures got rarer the older she got and Tarja blushed madly when they came to a picture where Tarja was 21 - she was hugging Noel, grinning happily and without a doubt in love. Her cheeks were chubby and her breasts were huge. She hadn't been fat, but definitely chubby. But in front of all she had been totally cute.  
"I ate a lot to that time," she mumbled. "And I wasn't sporty back then. I started doing sports everyday after I broke up with Noel - he called me fat one last time. He said I would never find someone again, someone who would love me with that body. Since then I'm doing sports everyday, I never want to be that chubby again."  
"He was an asshole," Tuomas snorted, not saying what he thought - that Noel had been a handsome asshole. He was really handsome, Tuomas understood why he had acted like an asshole.  
"Glad I have you now," Tarja answered and before their lips met, Tarja pulled back a little and locked their eyes. "What about having sex on my piano?"  
Tuomas laughed. "Would that work?"  
Tarja shrugged. "Let's try."


	36. Chapter 36

It worked.  
Tuomas gently caressed her thighs after he had lifted her on the black piano. He parted her legs and touched her genitals, played with her swollen clit.  
"You're so wet," he whispered and Tarja threw her head back, making her long hair touch the piano.  
"Then take me," she whispered. "Take me ..."  
"I will," Tuomas moaned and wrapped her legs around his middle before he brought himself inside her with an easy push.  
Tarja screamed as she felt his amazing manhood deeply inside her.  
"Oh God," she whispered. He filled her completely, she had never felt like that before him, so totally filled out.  
She lay back and parted her legs as much as she could, making it easier for him to enter her fully. Tuomas put his hands on her waist, holding her with a tight grip while he pushed against her steadily. She had her eyes closed again, her mouth hang open and she moaned his name, accompanied with the word "Faster!"  
Tuomas stared at the fragile thing beneath him, her naked figure sprawled on the piano, her back arched and her hands were gripping the edge of the piano.  
Tuomas went crazy if he only looked at her, aware that he had two of his favourite things combined now:  
Music and his favourite teacher.  
He pushed against said teacher faster and soon she let out a whimper, followed by a loud and operatic scream.  
He could never get tired of this scream.  
When she came she was singing, or it sounded as if she was.  
He loved her so much, and now he pulled her up and made their bodies collide, and while she was screaming her release into his sweaty skin, he continued pushing. She was gripping his ass now and made herself move against him steadily, and after she came back to the ground, Tuomas found his release as well.  
Tarja watched him cum and smiled happily, knowing that only she was the reason for his happiness. She hugged him tightly and waited until his orgasm had finished, then he pulled her off the piano and practically threw her on the bed, where he started to kiss every possible inch of her body.  
"I love you so much," he whispered into her ear before he kissed her earlobe. "So much."

Later, after they had taken quite an erotic shower, Tarja started cleaning the piano.  
"Not a good place to make love," she muttered and tried not to vomit while she tried to make everything that had ... dripped out vanish.  
Tuomas approached her from behind and circled his arms around her. He took her hair and pushed it forth, placing a kiss on her neck.  
"Okay," he mumbled. "Let's cross that place from our list."  
Tarja laughed. "We have a list?"  
"If you want to?" Tuomas chuckled and Tarja turned around.  
"This day was so amazing," she said seriously. "Yes, I definitely want to have a list." She grinned.

They went to bed at ten, wishing each other a good night. But after some smalltalk and loads of touching and giggling they did it one last time for that day.  
Their love making was slow and tender, yet passionate. None of them missed to tell the other what they felt for each other, they shared love declarations and gentle kisses and touches. They came almost in unison, him a little after her, they tumbled over the edge together with screams and sighs of happiness.  
They fell asleep with entwined bodies.

In the morning they had no time to make love again, they were too stressed not come too late for college. Tarja let him get out of the car a few blocks away from the building, as she did every time. And Tuomas walked the last kilometre to the school, not quite able to believe what had happed the day before.  
He had slept with his teacher, no, made love to his beautiful girlfriend for what, more than TEN times!?  
He felt dizzy when he thought back of it.  
Inside the college, he went to the boy's restroom first, since he hadn't had time to even look into the mirror this morning.  
He decided that he looked quite okay, a little tired but happy. His hair wasn't wavy but almost curled and it just looked as if he had forgotten to use a brush for a day. Which was right.  
He pulled his hair back to tie it togther, as he saw it.  
Crescent and once bloody marks on his chest. And a love bite, big and blue, right on his throat.  
Tuomas swallowed and let his hair fall down again. Oops. That woman ...  
He smiled happily before he went to History.   
After History and Religion he almost flew to the room in which the most beautiful woman on earth would teach him something about music.  
Tarja Turunen, the woman who had taken his virginity two nights ago, was preparing something on her desk.  
"Good morning," he greeted and Tarja looked up.  
"Good morning," she greeted back and let her eyes sink down on the papers again.  
Tuomas sat down in the first row, as always, and started to pull out his books. She was simply stunning.  
And she was his ... Now even more than before.  
His heart jumped when he thought of what he wanted to do to this woman right now -  
"Tuomas?"  
Tuomas winced and looked up, staring right into Linn's face.  
"Oh," he said a little dumb. "Hey, Linn."  
"Hi," Linn answered and smiled at him. "Are you feeling better?"  
"Yeah. A lot," Tuomas answered and Linn's eyes wandered down, until they got to rest on the spot where his shirt started.  
"I see," she said. "You're together with this girl now?"  
"She's a woman and yes, I am," Tuomas answered and pulled on his shirt, hoping he could make the marks vanish. But instead Linn saw his hickey.  
"Oh, nice," she mouthed and laughed. "I tell you, be glad you weren't here yesterday. Jokinen is in a really bad mood. Amy told Val and me that he screamed at everyone! He was the - hm." Linn looked around. "The exact opposite of Miss Turunen today."  
Tuomas' eyes rested on Tarja.  
She was laughing and smiling while she sorted some papers, she smiled at every student that came inside, she ... She was happy.

Her happiness didn't change during the lesson.  
When students asked her something, she answered politely, she even smiled at them. She answered in a good mood, sometimes waved her hands to empathise what she had said. Tuomas was proud that he was the causer of this good mood and he tried hard to suppress the grin every time she giggled. Because he knew that sultry giggle all to well, it was the giggle she had let out whenever he had kissed his way up between her thighs ...  
He was so hard again. Alone her giggle made his insides go crazy, made his manhood grow in await.  
He crossed his legs and stared at the desk, thinking of something that would make him hold it back. It was almost impossible, but the school seemed to make him get what he wanted and the bell rang.  
Tarja wished them a nice day and asked Tuomas to stay because of some questions she had concerning a song.  
Tuomas nodded and packed his things slowly, ignored Linn's "See you" and as soon as everyone had gotten out, he rushed forward and pressed Tarja against the teacher's desk.  
"You little minx," he whispered and pushed his hips against her, making her feel his hardness against the area of her womb.  
"Oh," Tarja said in surprise, but Tuomas' lips had already crashed down on hers. Tarja gave in, but just for a second. The moment their tongues touched, Tarja pushed him away. "Tuo!" she whispered a little panicking, but her cheeks were glowing. "Not here ... It's not safe here ..."  
"Toilet?" he suggested and Tarja giggled again. "I'd love to ... what about in twenty minutes? Meet me in front of the teacher's toilet, that one's way tidier."  
Tuomas nodded and pecked her lips before he rushed out.  
Twenty minutes later he asked the maths teacher if he could go to the toilet and Mrs Toppinen allowed him to. Tuomas almost ran towards the cafeteria, went right and down to the conference room of the teachers.  
Tarja was waiting for him.  
"Hi," she whispered and grabbed his hand, pulling him right inside the toilet.  
Where she started crying.  
"Tarja!" Tuomas whispered shocked and pulled her close. "No ... Please don't cry. What happened, my love?"  
"It's - it's Oliver," she whispered and buried her face into her boyfriend's shirt. "Mr Jokinen. He always comes and wants ... sex ..."  
"You didn't -?" Tuomas started carefully, knowing that she wouldn't cheat on him. Hopefully.  
And Tarja shook her head. "Of course not. I've refused him for the last months and he just visited me a few minutes ago. He was furious, he grabbed my wrists and wanted to ... I don't know, Tuomas. He stopped when I told him I had a boyfriend. I'm sorry."  
"There's nothing to be sorry for, baby," Tuomas mumbled and hugged her tight. Very tight. 

Both of them had returned to their classrooms, without having shared a quickie. Tuomas had tried to comfort his love, had suppressed the aggressive feelings towards the dark blonde teacher while he had told his love it wouldn't be bad at all. He cursed the male teacher, cursed him for hurting his baby. He knew he wouldn't be able to restrain himself from hurting the arts teacher the next time he would see him, so he punched at a wall next to the classroom before he entered again. It hurt, but this way he could continue maths without ripping his maths book apart.  
He slept at her place again, but Tarja seemed to be too troubled to do anything. Tuomas made a salad with baked chicken breast for her, and even though she was eating normally, she went to bed at nine. Tuomas stayed awake for a while, watched TV, looked a little through her flat, started reading Harry Potter for the felt hundredth time and joined her in bed at half past ten. In the morning he prepared breakfast and left the flat, but not without leaving a little note for her on his side of the bed.

Good morning, my love.  
I'm already at university, but I needed to tell you that you're beautiful. I almost wasn't able to tear myself away from your sleeping beauty.  
I hope you know that you make me deliriously happy. I look at you and I want to cry, I love you so much and I still can't believe you would love me back ... You're just too perfect.  
You're my world, Tarja. I'm so happy to have you ...  
I hope you slept well. See you later, sweetheart. I love you so much.  
Tuomas.

Tarja smiled and kissed the letter, whispering, "I love you too. You're too perfect for me ... Oh Tuomas."  
She sighed and rolled herself on her back and stared at the ceiling.  
After a while the tears rolled down her cheeks and she closed her eyes ...  
"Stop it, damn it Oliver, STOP!" I had screamed but he had parted my legs already, his hand was massaging me roughly. I couldn't hit him, he had pressed my hands on the desk - I tried to kick him, I screamed, hell, why did no one hear me?? He pressed his hand on my mouth and pulled down my panties with his other hand - I seized the moment to kick him in the stomach. I was wearing high heels, so I could have killed him even, if I had kicked harder.  
He tumbled back and stared at me, while I pulled up my panties again, then I drawled back quickly.  
"How - how can you do that," I had whispered, my eyes never leaving his.  
His eyes were parting, he looked at me in shock.  
"Tarja -"  
"You raped me, all the time you -" I couldn't find words. "I will tell my boyfriend want you did!"  
Oliver hadn't answered, instead he had turned around and fled.  
And I had wanted to tell Tuomas, really. But then I saw him and ... I just couldn't. He's not like that, he couldn't handle it. He wouldn't know what to do. I am the one to stay strong now, I have to stay strong for myself.  
Tarja decided that she wouldn't tell Tuomas what Oliver had done to her. She only would tell him if Oliver would try to rape her again.


	37. Chapter 37

February came to an end and soon March started. The snow fell heavier and heavier and didn't seem to stop. Tarja and Tuomas were always busy with Tuomas' moving, she drove him home one Thursday in the morning (Tuomas knew his parents were gone) and together they stuffed as much stuff that belonged to him as possible inside her car.  
Jule had told Tuomas one day that her block had one free flat now, after which Tuomas had blushed and mumbled that he would move in with his girlfriend. Jule had laughed, embraced him and told him how happy she was for him.  
Cia sadly had left the college, his mother had been right after all. Not everyone stayed until the end, but now he didn't need the free rooms that had stayed behind anyway.  
Tuomas hadn't talked to his mother within weeks, he was still disappointed about her reaction - was it so bad that he was together with his teacher?  
'No,' he decided while he pulled the naked figure of his girlfriend against himself and pressed a kiss on her shoulder. 'No. She's the best thing that ever happened to me. She makes me so happy ...'  
Tarja on the other side was also struggling with something. She still hadn't told him about Oliver and wondered if she even should.  
Tuomas was a sweetheart. He did everything to make her happy, no matter which effort it would take. Tarja observed him over the table, he was reading a book next to his daily cup of coffee in the morning.  
"Tuomas," she started carefully and the young man looked up.  
"Yes, Love?"  
Tarja swallowed. She couldn't tell him ... He would freak out.  
"What - what do you know about my relationship with Oliver?" she asked hoarsely and watched Tuomas' face darken.  
"Enough," he mumbled and Tarja nodded slowly. So he knew about their little affair after their relationship. "It's over, right?" Tuomas now asked and Tarja nodded, obviously shocked about his question.  
"Of course, Tuo! Of course it's over!"  
"Then let's not talk about that," Tuomas begged and lowered his eyes on the book again. Tarja put off her glasses (she didn't mind to wear them in his presence anymore) and crossed the table to sit down on his lap and sling her arms around him.  
"Tuo ..." she mumbled into his ear and nibbled on his earlobe.  
Tuomas closed his eyes after putting away the book and inserted his hand beneath her shirt - he was always in the mood, and so was she.  
He gently stroke her back, while Tarja caressed his ear with her lips, nipping on it, lickig it gently. Tuomas cupped one of her breasts, knowing she didn't wear a bra in the morning, and started to play with her hardened nipple.  
"Are you mad?" Tarja whispered into his ear and Tuomas pulled back.  
"Why would I be?" he asked calmly and Tarja smiled.  
"I don't know ... You know, I needed to talk about that ... I want you to know everything."  
"That's great of you," Tuomas said. "But can we do that later? I'm - I'm really hard already ..." He gave her breast a little squeeze and Tarja laughed, rubbing her ass against his lower region.  
She let out another evil laugh when Tuomas groaned and slapped her ass with his other hand. "Please don't make me wait," he groaned and Tarja pecked his lips.  
"Never, my Love. Have you ever roleplayed before?"  
Tuomas pulled back automatically, his face flushed but curious. "You know I never did," he muttered and Tarja jumped up, causing his hand to leave her breast.  
"I have a brilliant idea," she said with shining eyes, took his hand and pulled him up, pulling him towards the living room. She pushed him onto the couch, told him to wait a second and vanished inside her bedroom, where she pulled out the items she was looking for ...  
And when she returned to the living room, Tuomas stared at her with an open mouth.  
She was wearing a skirt, a very short, blue skirt and a white blouse. A blue handbag was dangling down from her shoulder.   
"Do you -," he started and had go clear his throat before he started anew. "Do you want to show your Finnish pride?"  
Tarja looked down on herself and giggled. "Mr Holopainen ..." she purred and Tuomas got that they were already roleplaying.  
"Miss Turunen ...?" he asked and Tarja got closer.  
"My parents can't come to the conference today, I'm really sorry," Tarja explained. "They said they've heard enough about me, my bad grades and my habits to huff at teachers. Is that okay?"  
Oh.  
Oh!  
He was a teacher and she was his student!  
"So - why are you here?" he asked and Tarja shrugged.  
"I thought we could talk about my grade," she mumbled and looked at the floor. "I can't bring home a D in English ... What will my family say?"  
"But you definitely deserve a D," Tuomas said and Tarja stepped closer - now he could see that she was wearing nothing beneath her skirt. Tuomas swallowed. If that scenario was real ... Well, in this way.  
"Miss Turunen, you forgot your panty," he pointed out and his jeans got tighter when she smiled at him innocently.  
"Did I?"  
"Oh yes," he said with a dry mouth and Tarja sat down on the coffee table, parting her legs.  
"Let's talk about my grade ..."  
Tuomas swallowed. "You have a beautiful vagina," he complimented and Tarja laughed.  
"Let's talk about my grade," she said again and opened her handbag - pulling out the black vibrator.  
Tuomas' mouth was so dry, it couldn't get drier.  
She fumbled with the buttons, making the black thing vibrate.  
"That's it," she mumbled, showing him the vibrator. "That's the level I like."  
"U-huh," Tuomas said dully, his eyes never leaving her naked glory.  
"Liking what you see?" Tarja asked innocently and put her feet on the couch, her legs making it impossible for him now to flee. Tuomas nodded and opened the zipper of his jeans - he needed more place.  
"Hm," Tarja said and looked down. "Is it still a D?"  
"Yes," Tuomas said and Tarja sighed. Without hesitating she slipped the vibrator inside herself.  
Tuomas internally died.  
She had never used the vibrator again after they had come together (besides the one time he had taken her with it), but now he wished that she had. Never had he seen something so hot ... She moaned quietly while pulling it outside and pushing it back, her eyes were closed, her mouth slightly open, her legs wide apart. The noise made Tuomas go crazy, the noise of the vibrator moving in and out her wet pussy.  
"Is it ... still a D?" she whispered and Tuomas cleared his troat.  
"Yes, Miss Turunen. You're simply to bad for a better grade," he answered and Tarja started moving the vibrator faster. "May I?" Tuomas now asked and touched her hand, which was pulling the vibrator in and out.  
"Only ... if you give me ... at least a C," Tarja whispered, already very close.  
"Okay, a C it is," Tuomas promised and Tarja pulled her hand away, while Tuomas took the vibrator. He knelt down in front of her and continued taking her with increasing fastness, while Tarja unbuttoned her blouse. She wasn't wearing a bra either.  
Tuomas could tell when she was close, it got harder for him to insert the vibrator, and the black thing itself was now completely covered with her juices. Tarja had cupped her breasts and massaged them, her eyes still closed. And when she let out a long, shrill moan, Tuomas pulled out the vibrator and leaned forward, licking away her juices.  
She came with a scream.  
Tuomas' tongue was licking every corner of her walls, looking for one specific spot inside her, but before he could find it, Tarja had pushed him away.  
"So, a C it is?"  
Tuomas nodded. "You taste wonderful, by the way. Better than the other students who had tried to bribe me."  
Tarja laughed. "You know - a B wouldn't be bad either ..." She twirled her long hair around her finger, her eyes wandering down. "I can tell you're very hard ..." Tarja pushed him back onto the couch and pulled down his jeans and boxers. "I've never seen or sucked the penis of a real man before," she said and Tuomas moaned.  
"You're a naughty one ..."  
"Gosh, you're hard," Tarja shouted in fake surprise. "And so big - I don't know if you will fit into me, I'm way too much of a virgin ..."  
Tuomas didn't answer and Tarja grinned at him smugly - and took his manhood inside her mouth. She didn't stop sucking until he was close, but before he could cum inside her mouth, she pulled away and climbed on him. She sat down on his hardness, making him vanish inside her within a second.  
"Condom -?" Tuomas breathed, but Tarja locked their eyes.  
"It's okay," she whispered and kissed him, while starting to ride him slowly. And Tuomas let go. The orgasm overtook him and he let his juices shoot inside her, which was a very new experience for both of them. Tarja grabbed his hair and rode him faster, pushed down on him, tightened her walls, making him hard inside her again.  
Tuomas grabbed her beasts and massaged them, while Tarja rode him towards the top.  
They came in unison, screaming out each other's last names.  
Their juices mixed and dripped out, staining their skins. But neither of them cared and as Tarja collapsed on his chest, both of them happy and exhausted, Tuomas hugged his 'student' gently.  
"You deserve an A in love making," he mumbled and Tarja smiled against his shirt.  
"So do you ... I love you so much," she nuzzled into the fabric and Tuomas chuckled.  
"The roleplay is over?" he asked and Tarja nodded. Tuomas put his hand on the backside of her head. "I love you too," he answered. His heart was going crazy - they had slept without a condom! He had come inside her twice!  
"Tarja ... Do you still take the pill?"  
"Why are you destroying the moment?" Tarja mumbled, but looked up to him. "No," she then answered his question and Tuomas' heartbeat stopped for a second.  
"No?"  
"I took the last pill two weeks ago," she answered. "My gynaecologist told me what could happen now, because, you know, my hormones will probably go crazy, now that I stopped taking it. But I don't need it anymore ..." She blushed. "Or what do you think?"  
"I also think you don't need it anymore," Tuomas said with a dry mouth and Tarja beamed at him.  
The unspoken words of the possibility to get a baby were floating around in the air but neither of them dared to catch them.  
"So," Tarja mumbled after a while. "What could we do today?"  
"What about visiting my parents?" Tuomas suggested and Tarja looked at him in confusion.  
"You're kidding, right?"  
"No, Tari. Look, we're going to stay together -" Tarja nodded and Tuomas continued, "they have to accept you. Accept us. Because one day, one day we'll - we'll be a family ..." He blushed and quickly continued, "I couldn't stand the thought that my parents, in front of all my very tolerant mother, don't accept my relationship with the woman I love more than anythig. It's been more than a month now, I'm already living with you - we should talk to them."  
"Okay," Tarja agreed. "Let me change, though."  
"No, why?" Tuomas laughed. "You can stay like that, especially my father won't mind."  
"No, thanks," Tarja laughed and got up. "Thanks for joining the roleplay ... It was fun."  
"Indeed," Tuomas agreed. "But I'm afraid your grade will stay a D - I'm no teacher to get bribed."  
"Damn," Tarja muttered. "Does that mean I have to find another way to get a good grade?"  
"Oh yes - with studying," Tuomas laughed and Tarja giggled.  
"You could give me private lessons, Mr Holopainen" she then purred. "We could study once or twice a week and have sex afterwards ..."  
"Sounds good to me, Miss Turunen" Tuomas agreed. "But please tell me, did I take your virginity today? I would feel bad if I did."  
"Mh - maybe?" Tarja winked. "Why would you feel bad?"  
"Because I know it's important to have your first time with a person you love, not with a person you want to bribe."  
But Tarja, again in her role, stepped close and locked their eyes. "I told you after we had sex," she whispered. "I do love you."  
Tuomas smiled. "I love you too, my naughty, little minx."


	38. Chapter 38

So Tuomas and Tarja drove to Kitee.  
They arrived around one in the afternoon, they had stopped somewhere for lunch, and soon they were holding hands in front of the Holopainen's front door.  
"Let's go in," Tuomas said softly and opened the door.  
Tarja followed him quietly. They stripped off their shoes and walked inside, their hands still entwined.  
"Mum?" Tuomas called and Tarja could hear quick footsteps approach.  
"Tuomas??" an unbelieving voice said and a second after, Kirsti Holopainen stood in front of hem, freezing.  
She stared at Tarja, only at Tarja and at their entwined hands.  
"Hi, Mum," Tuomas said softly, but Kirsti was still staring at Tarja.  
"Why is she here?" she huffed and Tarja felt her heart clench.  
"Because she's my girlfriend," Tuomas answered and pulled his woman close.  
Kirsti pressed her lips together. If she had only known about this relationship earlier ...  
"Mum," Tuomas said a little harsh. "Accept her. I love her."  
Kirsti glared at Tarja, who had started to blush a little.  
"You sleep with students?" Kirsti asked and Tarja shook her head.  
"No! Of course not! Tuomas is the first student I - I dated."  
Tuomas silently thanked her that she hadn't said 'slept with'.  
"It just happened," Tarja continued and smiled shyly. "He was there and he saved me from a horrible time ... he was so cute and nice ... I just fell in love with him ..." She blushed more and Kirsti sighed.  
"Will you take her to Sussu's wedding?"  
"I will," Tuomas said and squeezed Tarja's hand. "Everyone should see my perfect girlfriend."  
Tarja couldn't help but laugh a little. "I'm not perfect ..."  
"In my eyes you are," Tuomas mumbled and caught a little smile in his mother's face. "What?"  
"I can't deny you're cute," she sighed. "Well, as long as you don't care about the age difference ..."  
"We don't care," Tuomas immediately said. "We've talked about everything so far. I'll stay with her, Mum."  
"Well then," Kirsti sighed. "Congratulations."  
"Thanks, Mum," Tuomas said gently. "Where's Dad?"  
"He's working in the garage," Kirsti answered and Tuomas nodded.  
"Thanks. I'll go and get him. Do you want to stay here meanwhile?" he asked his girlfriend, who's heart stopped for a second.  
"Sure," she said, knowing that it would make him happy, even though she really didn't want to stay alone with his mother.  
"Great, you can help me preparing the dessert then," Kirsti suggested towards Tarja, who nodded relieved.  
"Sure," she offered and followed Kirsti into the kitchen.  
The blonde woman opened the cupboard and pulled out four plates and cups. Tarja carried them to the table, her hands still shivering.  
'Calm down, Tari,' she told herself. 'It's going well so far.'  
"So," Kirsti said as Tarja came back into the kitchen. "How exactly did it happen?"  
"How we came together?" Tarja asked nervously and Kirsti nodded. "Hm. It was at the Christmas party. He followed me outside after my performance and he just ... kissed me."  
"So he kissed you first?"  
"Yes, Mrs Holopainen. I wouldn't have dared to. I mean he's my student. It still feels weird ..."  
"And then you met again on New Year's Eve," Kirsti said and Tarja nodded.  
"We talked about the problems that could occur and we decided that we wanted to risk it. He then told me he loves me and well. He's just the right one for me." Tarja was staring at the kitchen counter, avoiding Kirsti's eyes.  
"Well, you definitely won't find a better man," Kirsti said and suddenly touched Tarja's shoulder. "Welcome in the family, Tarja. You can call me Kirsti."  
It still didn't sound as if she completely meant it, but it was a good start.

A little later, when Pentti had joined, the four of them were sitting around the table, drinking coffee and talking.  
Tarja had just told about her plan to quit and blushed when Kirsti asked if it was because of Tuomas.  
"Yes," she said. "Tuomas and I will stay together, which would mean that one day someone will find out about us. Of that I'm sure. As soon as I work at the Sibelius again, no one will care about us anymore."  
"You'll stay together," Pentti suddenly said. "So do we have to get mentally prepared that we could become grandparents soon?"  
Both Tuomas and Tarja went red and exchanged a look.  
"Probably," Tuomas said. "Yes."  
"Okay," Pentti answered while Kirsti didn't say a word.

"She still hates me," Tarja said and let herself fall on Tuomas' old bed. "I thought it was okay while you were gone but no, she still hates me. I don't know what to do ..."  
"Give her time," Tuomas whispered and crawled onto the bed, placing himself over his Love. "She didn't accept Kai either in the beginning. My sister's fiancé."  
"Thought so," Tarja said and closed her eyes when his lips met hers.

They made love in his old room, quickly and as quiet as possible.  
After that, they cuddled on his bed.  
"The baby talk," he mumbled, "we should have done it this morning."  
"Let's do it now," Tarja whispered and stroke his hair behind his ears. "I want a baby, Tuomas. But don't be scared, it won't happen that early. I only stopped with the pill two weeks ago."  
"Good," Tuomas said. "I want a baby from you, Tarja, but not yet. I can't be a father while I'm still in college."  
"Yes, I understand that." Tarja closed her eyes while Tuomas started kissing her neck. "Well, then let's not leave the condom away, hm?"  
"Agreed," Tuomas mumbled and nibbled her skin. "I didn't know you could be quiet as well."  
"While making love?" Tarja laughed. "Of course. I've had sex for several times inside my office and classroom ..."  
"Okay, got it," Tuomas mumbled and pulled away. "Let's go downstairs."

In the evening they only cuddled. Tuomas' fingers moved through her silky hair while Tarja had her eyes closed.  
"I love you so much, do you know that?" Tuomas whispered. "And even if my mother will never accept you, I will never stop loving you. You're my life."  
Tarja smiled happily.  
And he was her life.

And this way March ended and April started without any other drama. Drama came when Tarja started preparing everything for the music festival.  
"You lazy asses!" she screamed. "Your bands should have met in private to practise! So none of you ever met to practise??"  
The students shook their heads and Tarja groaned.  
"I can't believe it ... Okay. Calm down, Tarja." She breathed in and out and then her gaze immediately met Tuomas'. "Mr Holopainen and I will take that over."  
"What??" Tuomas immediately asked and Tarja clucked with her tongue impatiently.  
"Ever Dream, shall I go on?"  
Tuomas shook his head. She really wanted to sing Ever Dream ... In front of everyone!  
"Good. You'll be playing, then. We'll meet today afternoon for practise. You'll be there, no matter what you're up to this afternoon. See how easy it can be?" She looked around the classroom, every student was staring at Tuomas, who had blushed madly.  
Tarja grinned at him and Tuomas smiled back.  
This woman ...

"How did you do that?"  
Tuomas turned around. "Hey, Linn," he said and Linn crossed her arms. "How did you do that?" she asked again.  
"How did I ...?"  
"Miss Turunen likes you." Linn grimaced. "How did you do that?"  
"Well, I'm a good piano player," Tuomas said with a shrug.  
"So is Jule and about fifty other people in this school," Linn said and then she sighed. "Anyway. We haven't talked in a while. How are you?"  
"I'm fine," Tuomas said with a light smile. "And you?"  
"I have a boyfriend," Linn replied and now she smiled as well. "A Swede."  
"Nice," Tuomas said with a laugh. "Good luck to you. My lady is the most typical Finn someone can imagine."  
"We should meet!" Linn suddenly said. "All six of us, Val and Jack, Elis and me and your lady and you!" Tuomas swallowed, but Linn continued talking, her eyes shining. "What's her name?"  
"Soile," Tuomas said without hesitation.  
"Tuomas and Soile. Oh, I already ship you two." Linn jumped up and down. "Tell me a day she has time!"  
"I'm not sure," Tuomas stuttered, already thinking of asking Kaisa to be his 'alibi'. "She - she has to work a lot."  
"Just tell me, Elis and me are always free."  
"Okay," Tuomas muttered. "I'll call you when we have time." He eyed Tarja, who was sorting some things, grinning madly.  
"Alright," Linn said. "See you, Tuo. Bye, Miss Turunen."  
"Goodbye, Miss Barnelinen," Tarja said and as soon as Linn had gone out, she bursted into laughter. "You're screwed."  
"No, I'm not. I have a friend I could ask to play my girlfriend."  
Tarja stopped laughing. "Ah?"  
"Kaisa. Emppu's sister."  
Tarja's face went dark. "The blonde," she stated. "The pretty one."  
"Emppu or Kaisa?" Tuomas joked, but Tarja didn't laugh.  
"Meet me after your courses, Mr Holopainen," she said strictly and then she rushed out the classroom, leaving back a baffled Tuomas.

Tarja was crying. She felt so stupid, but she was so jealous ... She never really had been jealous before. But this was different ... Why was she jealous? She didn't know this woman, and after all Tuomas had the right to have a normal girl-friend!  
"Tarja?"  
Tarja looked up. "Oh. Hey Oliver."  
"Are you okay?"  
Tarja stared at him. After she had kicked him as he had tried to rape her, they hadn't talked to each other again.  
"I'm fine."  
Oliver didn't answer but instead he approached her, placing a single, red rose on her desk.  
Tarja looked at him. "Thanks," she muttered.  
"I just wanted to apologise," Oliver mumbled. "I shouldn't have done that. I know you have a boyfriend, but it's just - I love you, Tarja. I still do. It's been a year and I didn't stop loving you for a minute. I was jealous and desperate and I needed you ..."  
"It's over forever, Oliver," Tarja said coldly. "I was ready to give you another chance as that ... thing between us started after our break up. But Oliver, you raped me. I felt used, okay? Lauri doesn't use me for sex. He really loves me and he shows me."  
"I LOVE YOU TOO!" Oliver punched on Tarja's desk and Tarja jumped up.  
"Leave."  
Oliver grabbed her wrists. "I love you."  
Tarja got closer. "I despise you," she whispered and after freeing her wrists from him, she took the rose and slapped it into his face. The thorns left some scratches on his cheek.  
"Ouch! Fuck!" Oliver cursed.  
"You hurt me as well," Tarja said coldly.  
"Please, let me show you I love you -" Oliver tried again but Tarja cut him off.  
"No. Leave. Take your stupid rose and go fuck yourself with my face in your mind."  
"I always do," Oliver said and Tarja smiled, satisfied.  
"Good. Leave."  
Oliver lifted the rose from the floor, turned around and left the classroom, thinking of how he could show her.

Tuomas greeted her with a kiss, but Tarja replied it only softly. "Why didn't you tell me about Kaisa?" she asked quietly and suddenly Tuomas knew what was up.  
"I did," he said gently. "Don't you remember?"  
"Not really," Tarja mumbled and Tuomas noticed the tears in her eyes.  
"Baby," he said a little shocked. "Kaisa is Emppu's sister and she's the singer of my band ... Do you remember her now?"  
"The one who's engaged to the boy who bullied you?" she asked with wide eyes and Tuomas nodded. "I'm so stupid," she sighed and hugged him tight. Tuomas hugged her back, none of them noticing how the door went open. "Sorry."  
"It's alright," Tuomas mumbled. "I'm jealous too ..."  
Tarja looked up. "What?"  
"Mr Jokinen," Tuomas said with a dark face. "Every time he looks at you I could just punch him. I'm so jealous, Tari ..."  
"You don't have to be," Tarja whispered and kissed him. "You know I'm yours."  
A few metres away, in the halfway opened classroom door, stood no one else than Oliver himself.  
He kept quiet, but he couldn't believe what he just heard and saw.


	39. Chapter 39

Their performance had been a great success.  
Some who had understood the text had tears in their eyes while clapping, or at least they had tears in their eyes because the song had been so beautiful.  
"Thank you," Tarja said softly and smiled at Tuomas. "Thank you," she whispered to him and Tuomas smiled gently.  
"We were good," he said and Tarja nodded.  
"Meet me in an hour in the classroom?" she mumbled as Tuomas grinned at her, knowing what she was up to.  
"I'll be there," he promise, before he stormed towards his friends.  
He embraced Satu and pitied that Jukka hadn't come. Kaisa was there as well, and so was Emppu, and Tuomas was just glad that Paul wasn't with them.  
"You said your girlfriend was here," Emppu said and looked around. "Oh God - your music teacher."  
Everyone started laughing as Emppu hid behind his sister.  
"You were so good," Satu said to Tuomas. "Your teacher is a really good singer."  
"She is, isn't she," Tuomas said and sighed. "Guys, I have to tell you something ..."  
"Hey!" Linn had appeared next to Tuomas, embracing him. "Damn, you were good."  
Of course Satu, Kaisa and Emppu immediately thought that Linn was his girlfriend - everyone of them suddenly grinned madly.  
But then Linn asked, "So, whom of them is your girlfriend?"  
The smile of Tuomas' friends froze.  
"She isn't your girlfriend?" Kaisa asked puzzled.  
"No," Tuomas mumbled and Linn stared at him.  
"Huh?" she said. "Where is she then?"  
"Who is she even?" Emppu asked.  
"Stop it!" Tuomas called. "Just stop, okay? Satu, Kaisa, Emppu - this is Linn. Linn - my best friends. My girlfriend isn't here."  
"But you said -," Emppu started but Tuomas glared at him, so he stopped talking again.  
Linn smiled at Tuomas' friends, not commenting on that not even his best friends knew his girlfriend yet ... Was this woman even existing?

"We were so good," Tarja whispered while she slid off Tuomas' blazer.  
"We were, indeed," Tuomas whispered and kissed her neck. Kissed along her jawline. "We'll be good forever, no matter what we do ..." He pushed up her skirt and pressed his hardness against her panty. "You're so sexy by the way ... I almost couldn't concentrate on playing ..."  
"Me neither, I almost thought of giving them a little show ..."  
Tuomas chuckled before his lips landed on hers. Tarja fumbled with the zipper of his jeans pulling them down. His boxers and her panties followed and she pushed him back, right on her chair, where she sat down on him, letting their bodies join. She grabbed his shoulders while she rode him slowly, his hands on her ass, pulling her close whenever she came down. She breathed into his face and Tuomas claimed her lips again. Her arms went around him while she rode him faster.  
"We forgot - the condom - again," Tuomas moaned into her mouth.  
"Doesn't matter," Tarja breathed back and kissed him harder. The clicking wasn't heard through the sounds of their love making.  
Tuomas groaned when he felt that he was coming closer to the peak. "Tarja, I'm so close ..."  
"Wait, I'm - I'm almost there," Tarja breathed and Tuomas grabbed her thighs before he stood up and let her crash onto the teacher's desk, thrusting into her hard. He pushed himself so roughly against her, Tarja screamed with every thrust he made.  
And she let go when he did.  
Tuomas collapsed on her body, his juices floating into her, while her juices stained his shirt he was still wearing.  
None of them cared.  
They screamed and moaned until their orgasms were over then he pulled out of her and kissed her.  
Tarja was still breathing. "Tuomas ... I ..."  
"Let's go back to the party, before someone notices," he whispered and Tarja nodded. "By the way, I want you to meet my friends ... as my girlfriend."  
"Okay," Tarja whispered and smiled. "Today?"  
"I don't know, no one else should see us together," he mumbled, not knowing that it was already too late.  
Someone had seen them and someone had taken pictures of their love making in the classroom.  
And this someone was looking through the pictures right now, thinking of how he could bribe the handsome student and the stunning teacher ...

Tuomas returned to the party first. He and Tarja had agreed that they shouldn't return together, so Tarja was still busy with cleaning the desk.  
"Where have you been?" Emppu asked and Tuomas raised his brow.  
"Toilet," he just answered while Kaisa eyed him suspiciously.  
"Let me guess ... Your girlfriend is here," she said dryly and Tuomas sighed.  
"Yes, but -"  
"It's not Linn," Satu now said. "We know that."  
"Who is she? Come on, Tuo," Kaisa said challenging. "Sooner or later you have to tell us."  
"I'll tell you soon but not now," Tuomas muttered.  
"You smell like a woman," Emppu suddenly said. "She has a nice perfume."  
"Guys," Tuomas groaned. "Yes, we just had a quickie -"  
"Tuomas!" Kaisa screeched and slapped his arm. "You're not a virgin anymore!" she then whispered and Tuomas grinned.  
"Yeah. She took it from me."  
Satu and Kaisa screeched around like two crazy girls, while Emppu patted his friends' arm. "Congrats, bro."  
Tuomas grinned a little uncomfortably, he didn't want Tarja to see them. Luckily she was still inside ...

"Tarja, I -"  
"Dammit, Oliver," Tarja groaned. "Leave. I don't want to talk to you!"  
"I just - Tarja, you were amazing. That song was brilliant."  
Tarja looked at Oliver and noticed how sorry he looked. "Thanks," she said softly.  
"Tuomas is a good student," Oliver said and internally cheered when Tarja looked down, obviously trying to hide her blush.  
"Yep."  
"I just wanted to tell you that I ... I won't try to have you again. I promise." Oliver went closer and took her hand, but Tarja pulled it away.  
"And what was that, then?"  
"I just wanted to take your hand," sighed Oliver. "I won't pester you again but I also won't stop loving you. Good luck with your boyfriend. You deserve it." And with those words he left.  
"Thanks," Tarja mumbled after him.

After a while she went back to the party, catching Tuomas talking to his friends. Emppu was with them, so Tarja grinned and straightened her skirt before she approached them.  
Only the dark haired girl noticed that Tarja was approaching them and pulled the blonde girl's jacket, who now looked at her as well.  
"Hi," she said and came to stand next to Emppu, looking down at him demonstrative. "Remember me?"  
"Sadly," Emppu groaned while everyone else laughed.  
"Tuomas," Tarja said. "Thanks again for helping me. You're the only one in my class I can trust. Seriously. Don't think you won't receive a little thank you for that."  
Tuomas stared at the floor. "That's not necessary, Miss Turunen ..." he mumbled, but Tarja stepped closer, not able to restrain. Her hand took his upper arm and after giving it a little squeeze, she rubbed it gently.  
"It is necessary," she claimed and winked at him. "See you."  
And after she had gone away far enough, Tuomas' friends let out the breath they had been holding.  
"She is so hot," Emppu breathed.  
"You flirted again!" Kaisa whispered.  
"She harassed you," Satu said.  
Tuomas threw an icy look at Satu. "She didn't," he said.  
"What?" Satu said. "You know what it means when an elder woman rubs your arm like this? It means 'I want you'. Tuomas, this woman ..."  
"Yeah, did you see how she looked at him??" Kaisa now added. "It reminds me of Satu when she was after Jukka."  
Satu groaned. "Was I really that bad?"  
"Oh yes," Emppu now said before he turned to Tuomas.  
"I personally think the girls are right," he said. "Though I'm not that shocked. If you have the chance to, bang her for a better grade."  
Tuomas laughed dryly. "If I ever get to bang her, it won't be for a better grade," he said coldly before he turned around at walked over to his parents.  
He only heard Satu whisper, "Does that mean he likes her?" But he shook it off as he came to stand next to his parents.  
"You were brilliant!" Kirsti said and hugged her son. "I am so proud, honey!"  
"Kirsti can't believe you wrote the song," Pentti added. "I told her you got her talent, but she still won't believe it."  
"Well, Tarja and I wrote it together," Tuomas said. "She's always underestimating herself. She's so good but she can't really see it ..."  
"She has an amazing voice indeed," Kirsti said and pressed her lips together. "Tuo - you should be more careful ..."  
"Do you think it was a bad idea to perform together?" Tuomas asked nervously.  
"Well that and -" Kirsti lowered her voice. "That and the fact that you went into the school together fifteen minutes ago."  
Tuomas' shoulders fell. "We - we didn't do -"  
"We don't care," Pentti quickly said and received an angry look from his wife. "We don't care, Kirsti," he said and Kirsti rolled her eyes. "But Tuomas, really - be more careful. Someone followed you."  
"Are you stalking us?" Tuomas asked harshly, not believing his parents that someone had followed him and Tarja.  
"Tuomas Lauri Johannes Holopainen!" Kirsti said strictly. "Your father and I are concerned about you and, believe it or don't, your girlfriend. Pay a little more attention and tell your woman she shouldn't touch you in front of other people."  
"I can't believe you're stalking us," Tuomas muttered. "It doesn't matter, mother, Tarja will leave this school soon anyway."  
"But right now she's still your teacher," Pentti said. "I like her and I don't want her to get into jail."  
Kirsti glared at her husband. "Sure you like her," she spat. "You've always had it for women like her."  
"Could you please fight somewhere else?" Tuomas huffed. "I have to go to my friends now."  
And with those words he walked over to Amy, Linn, Valerie Elis and Jack, intending to introduce them to Emppu, Satu and Kaisa.

A while later, Tarja picked Tuomas up from the café they had planned to meet. Tuomas saw her black Ford stop in front of the café, took what was left of his muffin, said goodbye to the nice waitress and went outside.  
He entered the car and pulled his woman close, locking their lips in a searing kiss.  
They kissed for minutes, until Tarja pulled away.  
"You taste like chocolate," she mumbled and Tuomas offered her the rest of his muffin. Tarja slung it down greedily. "I'm so hungry," she said with a full mouth. "Where can we go?"  
"I know a nice restaurant, mother told me about it," Tuomas said gently. Even when her mouth was full of chocolate muffin she was still adorable. "She once said, 'Only bring a woman there if you want to spend the rest of your life with her'. And since I've found her ..."  
"Who is she?" Tarja joked. "I'll kill her."  
"Don't you dare," Tuomas said put his hand on Tarja's cheek. "Are you happy that this music not-festival is over?"  
"Very," Tarja laughed. "I hate to do this over and over every year ... I'm so glad I now have a real reason to leave."  
They smiled at each other, until Tarja spoke up again. "Let's drive to that restaurant, lover."

They sat at the table in the most beautiful restaurant that Tarja had ever seen. It wasn't all too noble but there was something that made the furniture something special.  
They held hands, their eyes locked.  
"Do you want to escort me to my sister's wedding?" Tuomas whispered and Tarja nodded.  
"Of course, baby ... Of course I want to."  
Tuomas smiled and pulled her close, pressing a kiss on her lips. "I love you more than words can say," he mumbled. "Nothing can part us."  
"Nothing," Tarja mumbled back. She couldn't believe how healthy and beautiful her relationship with this wonderful man was. "Nothing can destroy our happy being."  
Tuomas smiled and they kissed again.  
If they only knew.


	40. Chapter 40

"Wow. You look ... Wow."  
Tuomas was speechless and Tarja looked down at herself, smiling proudly.  
She wore a tight, sleeveless dress with black and white roses on it. It reached about her knees and showed her curves perfectly.   
She reached a little higher than up to his chin now due to her five centimetre pumps.  
Her hair was open and wavy and curled and her make up was easy and not too much.  
"I just fell in love again," Tuomas breathed and took her hand. "Who are you, beautiful woman?"  
"My name is Tarja," Tarja said with a smile. "Buy I warn you, handsome mister, I have boyfriend and I think he won't like -"  
Tuomas cut her off with a kiss. "I don't care, I will take my angel right here and now."  
But as he had lifted her up and was about to carry her towards the bedroom, someone rang the doorbell.  
"Mum is here," Tuomas groaned and placed Tarja on her feet again. "Let's do that later."  
He rushed to the door and opened, telling his parents they should come in. As they greeted Tarja, Tuomas noticed that his father was looking a little too long at the teacher, so he dragged his parents through the flat.  
"It's so tidy," Kirsti noticed.  
"It always is," Tuomas said and added quietly, "Tarja has a light form of an OCD."  
"Oh," Kirsti said and a hint of sympathy crossed her face. "What happened to that poor woman?"  
"Some things," Tuomas mumbled. "Come on, I'll show you her piano."

Later they sat in the backseat of the Holopainen's car, holding hands. "You'll like Sussu," Tuomas promised. "She's a lot like you, actually."  
"Yeah, the age is the same, for example," Kirsti said and Tuomas rolled his eyes.  
"Don't listen to her," he mumbled. "You'll love my family, especially my grandmother. And my aunt! My aunt is so funny once she has drunken too much."  
Tarja laughed. "And what if they don't like me?"  
"They will, I love you. Mum also accepted you at last."  
"I would accept her even more if she wasn't your goddamn teacher!" Kirsti defended herself.  
"She -," Tuomas started, but Kirsti interrupted him.  
"Yes, she'll quit, but she still was your teacher for two trimesters, still you came together when she was your teacher, still you had sex with your teacher."  
No one said a word, no one dared to. Kirsti turned around and looked at them. "You know how it'll look if he gets an A in Music?"  
"He will get an A because he's my best student," Tarja said quietly and Kirsti laughed.  
"And if he wouldn't satisfy you?"  
"Kirsti," Pentti now said. "Don't underestimate our son."  
"Tuomas isn't the only one who'll get an A," Tarja said, deep red.  
"So he isn't the only student whom you f-"  
"Mother!" Tuomas suddenly yelled. "Shut up, okay?? Why are you so unhappy with the fact that Tarja and I are in love??"  
Kirsti turned around again, not saying a word.  
Tarja was staring out of the window, fighting to hold the tears back.

They arrived at the little church in Kitee a little later. Tarja's eyes were red and Tuomas pulled her in an embrace before they left the car. "Shsh," he said gently and kissed her forehead. "I love you, that's all that counts."  
"I know," Tarja said and smiled. "Though I still don't understand why they had to pick us up."  
"They wanted to see our apartment," Tuomas said with a shrug and kissed his girlfriend's lips before he looked outside the car window, spotting almost his whole family in front of the church. "Come on, now. They're waiting."  
Tarja swallowed when she left the car with Tuomas, everyone's eyes widened. And as Tuomas grasped Tarja's hand and smiled at her gently, everyone else's mouths went open.  
"Hi," Tuomas greeted his family. "I hope the wedding hasn't started yet?"  
"No," an elder woman said. "Tuomas? Don't you want to introduce your ... date?"  
"Oh, right," Tuomas said. "That's Tarja. My girlfriend."  
"So Kirsti didn't lie!" Tuomas' grandmother called and grabbed Tarja's hand. "Hello, Tarja! I'm Pauliina, Kirsti's mother."  
Everyone introduced himself to Tarja and after they were done, Tarja didn't feel that bad anymore. They were all quite nice.  
Tuomas' aunt Aino had already confiscated her as her new best friend, she was talking and talking and talking ...  
"Hey."  
Tuomas looked right and grinned at his brother Petri. "Hi."  
They embraced shortly. "How are you?" Petri asked and Tuomas shrugged.  
"Quite alright. You?"  
"Not that good," Petri answered. "Saara and I broke up."  
"Oh no," Tuomas muttered and looked over to his aunt and Tarja.  
"Aino brought a hot friend, I see," Petri said and before Tuomas could stop him, he had stepped over to them.  
"Aino, hey!" he said and hugged his aunt before he turned to Tarja with his usual smile he used when he wanted to get a woman. "I'm Petri. Petri Holopainen. Susanna's brother."  
They shook hands and Tuomas grinned, knowing what would come next.  
"I'm Tarja," Tarja answered with her brightest smile. "Tarja Turunen. Tuomas' girlfriend."  
Aino's laugh was incredible, and so was Petri's shocked face.  
"This time Tuo was faster!" Aino giggled, while Petri observed Tarja from head to toe.  
"You're - together - with my ... little brother?" he stuttered and Tarja nodded.  
"For about five months now," she said and Tuomas stepped next to her, taking her hand.  
"Yes, Petri," he said with a light smile. "She's my girlfriend. What do you say now?"  
"Congrats," Petri muttered and then he wiggled his brows at his little brother. "She's way too hot for you."  
Tuomas opened his mouth to start a discussion, but suddenly the church doors went open.  
"Susanna is here," Kirsti announced. "Please take a seat everyone!"  
Tuomas had a seat in the first row, but Tarja had to sit more in the middle, next to a friend of Tuomas' cousin. He couldn't stop staring at her and for a minute Tarja was afraid that he knew her.  
But then the ceremony started and Tarja forgot about it.

The ceremony lasted about forty minutes and was simply beautiful. They had arranged a young singer with her guitar and she sung beautiful. Even Tarja started crying after Hallelujah.  
She waited for him outside the church, drying her wet eyes.  
Aino came to her and nudged her arm. "Beautiful, hm?"  
"Very," Tarja sniffed. "I cried."  
"I can see," Aino laughed and Tarja smiled. "So you're really together for five months already?" Aino asked and Tarja nodded.  
"Yes. We're already living together."  
"I really thought that Kirsti only joked about Tuomas and his new woman!" Aino said. "No offense, but how old are you?"  
"Thirty," Tarja answered and her heart jumped in joy when Aino didn't stop smiling.  
"Ah, okay," she only said. "I already figured you're a little older than him."  
But their conversation got interrupted abruptly when Susanna and Kai left the church and everyone started throwing flowers at them.  
Tuomas came to stand next to Tarja and together they threw flowers at the newly wed couple until they had no flowers anymore. "Did you like it?" Tuomas asked as he swept Tarja into his arms.  
"It was beautiful," Tarja said with a smile. "I cried."  
"I can see," Tuomas replied in the same way than his aunt had.  
He kissed her lips.

A while later they drove to the place where the party would be held, it was a hotel with quite a nice party location. They ate and drank as much as they could and a live band was there, nothing could be better. Every now and then someone sat down at their table and asked them things. Aino was the nosiest of them all.  
"What's your profession? Do you have kids? How did you meet?"  
"Teacher, no, long story," Tarja answered and squeezed Tuomas' hand beneath the table. They had talked and came to the agreement that the story how they met was complicated.  
A while later some cousins showed a slideshow of the wedding eve party and Tarja had tears in her eyes of laughing - seemed as if it had been really funny. One of Tuomas' younger cousins was quite embarrassed, she had been really drunk and was only eighteen. They had showed a picture of her hanging over a bucket the next day.  
"That's mean," Tarja laughed and eyes the young girl called Sirja, who, she had found out, was Aino's daughter. Aino was Kirsti's sister and Pauliina was Kirsti's mother.  
Pentti's family was somewhere else, at the bar, Tuomas had told her. His uncle was dancing with one of Susanna's friends while his aunt Emili, Pentti's sister drowned herself in alcohol and their son Oskar, who had talked to Tarja over the phone last Christmas, wasn't there anymore, he and his girlfriend had already left.  
"Let's dance?" Tarja suddenly asked and Tuomas choked.  
"Tarja, we can't dance."  
"Tuo, it's eleven in the evening and everyone's drunk - no one will care we can't dance."  
So they danced, well, jumped around like two crazy fools. Just like in the evening they had got together.  
Tarja had been right, no one cared that they couldn't dance. And when a slower song came on, they danced as they had danced at the night in December ... Tarja laid her temple on her lover's shoulder and Tuomas caressed her back gently. They didn't know they got observed by a few people until Susanna pulled them apart.  
"Tuomas??" she asked. "Is this - is this T???"  
Her eyes were wide and her cheeks were red. It was obvious that she had drunken too much already.  
"Her name is Tarja and yes," Tuomas said and Susanna screeched, pulling Tarja in a tight hug.  
"I love you for loving my brother back, Tarja!" she shouted. "He was so down because of you, he thought you didn't like him!"  
"I've always liked him back," Tarja said and Susanna pulled her away from Tuomas.  
"I'm Susanna, Tuo's sister." she said and Tarja laughed.  
"I figured."  
They twirled over the dance floor. "I didn't know you were older than him," Susanna went on. "How old are you?"  
"Thirty," Tarja answered.  
"Then you're even older than me!" Susanna called and Tarja got uncomfortable.  
"Yeah ..."  
The band had stopped playing for a second as Susanna asked on. "So, how did you two get together? Or how did you even meet? I've always thought you were a classmate of his."  
"Oh, that's complicated -" Tarja started.  
But she got interrupted.  
By a very drunk Kirsti.  
"Tell them the truth," she said loudly and Tarja's eyes widened in horror. She had stepped onto the stage and talked into the microphone. "Tell them, you're his teacher."  
Suddenly it was completely quiet. Everyone was listening.  
"His teacher??" Susanna asked and pushed Tarja away. "What?"  
"Tarja is Tuomas' teacher," Kirsti repeated. "Tarja Turunen sleeps with her students. She's a little slut."  
"I don't sleep with my students!" Tarja screamed and looked at Tuomas, who only stood there, not knowing what to do. "I - Kirsti, don't!"  
"I'm so sorry, Tarja, but I need to tell everyone. My son Tuomas is twenty-one and he lives together with his thirty year old teacher. They knew each other for only a month as they got together! They practically have sex everywhere!"  
"Kirsti!" a few shocked voices screamed.  
Tuomas saw his grandparents and his father approach the woman on the stage.  
"Leave me alone!" Kirsti shouted. "They all have to know!"  
"But this is private!" Pauliina yelled.  
"Mother!" Kirsti shouted back. "My son is fucking his teacher! And he will get an A in her subject - how does that look like??"  
"As if he's fucking her to get a better grade!" someone shouted.  
"Yes! And Tarja agreed! That just screams slut. I'm sure Tuomas wasn't the first student by whom she got laid. Hold her!"  
Tarja had turned around and started running, but a few quick hands had grabbed her arms and shoulders and pulled her back.  
"Let me go!" Tarja screamed.  
Her face was wet and she was shaking. "Let me -"  
"Let her go!" Tuomas now yelled and pulled his brother, cousin and his friend away from her. "Tarja, baby ..."  
Tarja was sitting on the floor, her face covered by her hands. Tuomas glared at his mother. "You monster!" he shouted at her. "Apologise!"  
"Never," Kirsti laughed. "You know that I'm against this relationship. Break up with her."  
"Never," Tuomas replied and lifted the crying woman into his arms, who slung her arms around his neck and hid her face in his blazer. Tuomas turned to the wedding guests.  
"Yes. This woman is my teacher. But for me she's so much more, okay? She's the woman I love. She's my life." Tuomas smiled. "I fell in love with her and she fell in love with me. It's not fair to say such things about us. All of you fell in love once, I happened to fall in love with my teacher." He put his hand on her head. "Shh, Love ... Listen, this woman makes me happy. So please forget about the fact that she was and still is my teacher. I'm not sleeping with her to get better grades. I'm sleeping with her because I love her more than anything. Think of it and if you're okay with our relationship, you may be allowed to come to our wedding."  
Tarja smiled as he said that and looked up to him.  
A few claps went through the crowd as Tarja pulled his face down and kissed him.  
Kirsti smacked the microphone on the floor. She cursed as her husband pulled her off the stage, shouting at her.  
Susanna stood in the middle of the dancefloor, helpless.  
"Make love to me," Tarja whispered and Tuomas grinned.  
"Excuse us!" he shouted. "I'm going to make love to my beautiful teacher now!"  
And then he carried her outside, laughing.


	41. Chapter 41

"I don't wanna go down," Tarja mumbled and buried her face in her pillow. "I'm scared, honey ..."  
"Don't be. But if you want to, I can go down first and see what they think about us -"  
Tarja nodded and kissed her boyfriend. "Do that. Please. I'll sleep a little more ..."  
"I will," Tuomas mumbled and kissed her back, before he went out and downstairs.  
His family was already eating, and when he entered the room, Aino waved him.  
"Tuomas!" she called. "Where's your beautiful girlfriend?"  
Tuomas smiled. "She's still sleeping."  
"Wake her up, we want to talk to her," Pauliina said calmy and Tuomas frowned.  
"Are you ... are you mad?" he asked lowly and Aino shrugged.  
"At your mother, yes," she replied.  
"That was not right," Pauliina said and now one of his cousins spoke up.  
"Who cares if she's your teacher? You love her, right?"  
"Very much," Tuomas said and smiled. "She's the one," he then whispered and Aino hugged him.  
"What your mother did was not right. You should have seen Susanna."  
Tuomas winced. "Sussu! Is she mad?"  
"At your mother, like all of us," Pauliina answered. "She's already awake, her and Kai's plane leaves in five hours."  
"I need to apologise," he said and stood up, but as he hurried out of the room, he ran into his sister.  
"Tuo," she called gently and embraced him. "Are you okay?"  
"I'm fine - but I can see you aren't," Tuomas chuckled. "Hungover?"  
"Very," Susanna groaned. "You?"  
Tuomas smiled. "Not even a bit. The only think I drank yesterday was a glass of wine."  
"What?? Don't tell me you're not drinking anymore!" Susanna looked quite unbelieving and Tuomas grinned more.  
"I'm not drinking nor smoking anymore. I quit both because of Tarja."  
"Wow, that woman is really good for you," Susanna mumbled and avoided her brother's look.  
"Sussu -" Tuomas started. "I'm so sorry because of yesterday ..."  
"So am I," Susanna said through gritted teeth. "It's all Mama's fault."  
"Somehow it's my fault," Tuomas mumbled. "I fell in love with my teacher."  
"That doesn't matter," Susanna said gently. "Love is love and I could see you love her with your whole heart. I wish you so much happiness."  
"Oh, Sussu," Tuomas sighed. "It's just - was it bad after we left yesterday?"  
"Hm, Dad pulled Mama away and the party went on, so not really. I danced with a few more people and some who asked me about you didn't seem as if they were thinking of your relationship in a way our sweet mother does. Don't listen to her."  
"Mother already knows that we want to get a baby," Tuomas said and Susanna started squealing.  
"Really?? Is Tarja pregnant?? Is that why you quit smoking??"  
"Shhh, sh, no she isn't - yet!" Tuomas hushed his sister. "We're waiting a little longer. I may even quit college to work again. I'd do everything for her."  
"Aww, Tuo." Susanna hugged her brother again. "Remember when I told you that 'T' would be stupid if she didn't love you back? This, exactly this behaviour of you is the reason she does love you back."  
Tuomas smiled. "Thanks for encouraging me. Do you have time to talk a little?"  
"Sure - just let me pack the rest of my stuff."  
"Where are you going?" Tuomas asked nosily and Susanna's eyes got dreamy.  
"Scotland. You know I've always loved Scotland ..."  
"Wow, haha, and I already thought you'd come home with a serious sunburn! No, I'm happy for you. Congratulations, by the way." Tuomas nudged his sister's arm. "Can't believe that big girl got married."  
"You're stupid." Susanna pouted. "Let's talk in a few minutes, okay? Okay?? Bring your lady!"  
"Okay!" Tuomas laughed and they parted.

Later Tuomas returned with his lady. Tarja still acted a little insecure, especially as everyone looked at her.  
Tuomas led her to the table where his grandparents, Aino, Sirja, Susanna and Kai sat and and soon they had taken a seat between Aino and Susanna. Tarja poured herself some coffee and started eating, aware that she was the only one eating. Had they all just waited for her?  
"So," Tuomas grandfather Harri started. "How exactly did it happen?"  
"How we fell in love?" Tuomas asked and everyone around the table nodded.  
Tuomas smiled. "As I walked into the classroom, I had no idea what a beautiful creature would wait for me. But then I saw her and ... It was love at first sight. For me it was."  
It was quiet and Tarja took his hand, her heart beating. Never had someone talked about her like this.  
"So it was for me, even though I desperately tried to hold it back. I told myself I couldn't fall for a student but it just happened ... He was so different than the others. Elder and so adult. So sensitive. So smart, so romantic, so ..." She lost herself in his blue eyes and couldn't help but peck his lips gently.  
"Aw," Susanna said. "So, Tarja, tell us more about yourself!"  
"Well, my name is Tarja Turunen, I'm a music teacher, I'll get thirty-one in August and I'm together with this wonderful man here," Tarja said and rubbed Tuomas' shoulder.  
"You forgot to tell them about your talents," Tuomas said, but as Tarja only blushed but didn't answer, Tuomas told his family. "She's the best singer this world has ever seen."  
"Shh, no I'm not," Tarja said and slapped her boyfriend's upper arm.  
"You are, believe me," Tuomas claimed. "Sing something."  
"Are you crazy?? Not here!"  
"Oh come on, you have to train your voice anyway!"  
"Let her, Tuomas," Susanna scolded her brother. "She doesn't want to." Tarja gave her a thankful smile and Susanna winked at her. "Sing for me another time."  
Tarja smiled happily and caught both Aino and Pauliina smile at her. Tarja's heart was fluttering. They liked her and they accepted their relationship. Nothing could ruin this day.

But when they arrived at home, Tarja's mood changed immediately.  
"We got a letter!" she said, both surprised and in panic. Who knew that they lived together besides Tuomas' and her family? And why would they write them? But fact was, the letter was addressed to Tarja Turunen & Tuomas Holopainen.  
"We got what?" Tuomas, who had just taken off his jacket, asked. He walked over to Tarja and took the envelope from her. His eyes widened.  
"Whom of those who know that we live together would write a letter to us?"  
"I asked myself the same question," Tarja answered. "And it makes me nervous that our names and address is written with the computer -  
Tarja suddenly got white as a sheet of paper. "I - I hope my mother is okay," she whispered.  
"Shall I open?" Tuomas offered and Tarja nodded.  
She was shaking, her whole body was shaking.  
Tuomas opened the envelope and pulled out was inside.  
His heart almost stopped as his eyes fell on the three pictures inside. "Fuck!" he cursed. "Tarja ... Shit."  
"What is -" Tarja started and took the pictures from him.  
She stared at them, not able to believe what she saw.  
It was a picture of them, or better said pictures of their love making during the music festival.  
The first picture showed Tarja riding him on the chair, on the second picture he was taking her on the desk and the third picture showed them kissing after their love making.  
"No," Tarja whispered. "Someone has seen us? No!"  
"Someone has," Tuomas whispered. "We weren't careful enough."  
Tarja shook her head. "Who! Oh shit, Tuomas! If this person tells someone -"  
"We're screwed," Tuomas mumbled. "Okay, calm down. Is there something else inside? A bribe?"  
"What, do you think the person wants to bribe us for money?" Tarja asked, but thruth be told, she hoped for it. At least the person would - hopefully - leave them alone then.  
But there was nothing inside, not a note. And nothing stood on the backside of the pictures.  
"Shit," Tuomas mumbled. "Who could -" He stopped talking when he remembered that his mother had seen someone follow them inside. But he couldn't call his mother, not after what she had done last night ...  
"What?"  
Tuomas looked up and noticed that his girlfriend's expression was desperate.  
"Nothing," he said. "We can only hope that this is only a warning. From now on we'll be more careful, okay?"  
"Okay," Tarja whispered and Tuomas walked over to hug her and kiss her forehead.  
"So now what should we do with those pictures? Burn them?"  
Tarja stared at him. "Are you insane?? Look at them - they're amazing! We look so hot."  
Tuomas laughed shortly. "It'd be even hotter if we made it by ourselves. But okay, let's hang them up in our bedroom."  
Tarja pressed her hands on her mouth and whispered, "Let's do it!"  
"What, hang them up?" Tuomas asked dumbstruck and Tarja started jumping up and down.  
"Let's do it - let's record us!"  
"You're crazy," Tuomas said with a dry mouth, but faster than he could even think about it, he added: "Okay."

And they did it.  
Tarja put the camera on the piano and checked that they would be seen.  
She nodded at Tuomas and he sat down on the bed, busying himself with some papers.  
Tarja stepped up to him, wearing the short skirt and blouse again. Soon they were in their roles once again.  
"Miss Turunen!" Tuomas said in fake surprise. "I hadn't expected you! What are you doing here? It's midnight!"  
"I couldn't sleep ..." Tarja mumbled. "I drove past the school and saw the light ... What are you still doing here?"  
"I also couldn't sleep," Tuomas replied. "I couldn't stop thinking of you."  
"Same here," Tarja replied softly and then she slung her arms around him, capturing his lips.

Later they watched the video, their mouths open. They had really made a porn. Tuomas grasped his woman's hand, his eyes drawn to the little display.  
What he saw was a trembling Tarja, who was clenching the sheets of the bed. Her legs were parted while a dark haired man's face was covered between her thighs.  
"This ... is ..." Tuomas mumbled.  
"Strange," Tarja whispered, her doubting look directed to her breasts.  
"Hot!" Tuomas claimed. "Look at your face."  
"My god, I look as if I was dying!" Tarja laughed and Tuomas nudged her arm.  
"You look as if you were -"  
"Tuomas - I'm - I'm -" the Tarja in the camera screamed and the Tuomas in the camera grabbed her hips. They watched Tarja reaching the peak with a scream and then they watched Tuomas entering her slowly.  
"We look - eh -" Tarja started and Tuomas hugged her.  
"Say we look good with each other."  
"We totally do," Tarja breathed, watching Tuomas grab her thighs to push himself deeper into her.  
Tarja let out a long and operating scream when she came again, a scream that almost sounded like the solo of a song ...  
"I love this sound so much," Tuomas chuckled. "Cause I know it was me who made you cum."  
They changed the position, now Tarja was riding Tuomas to ecstasy.  
"I love your back," Tuomas said before he watched himself cry out his Love's name.  
After the movie was over, Tarja and Tuomas looked at each other.  
"That was -" Tarja started again, but this time she put her index finger on Tuomas' lips. "Hot! Amazing! I've never done that before." She blushed. "Thanks for joining."  
"Of course, Love," Tuomas chuckled and kissed her finger. "Let's do that more often, okay?"  
"Yes," Tarja said, her eyes shining. But then her face darkened. "We have to find out who knows about us."  
Tuomas nodded and then his eyes widened. "What if - my mother -?"  
"No," Tarja immediately said. "I'm sure she has nothing to do with this. She may have talked about our sex life in front of your whole family, but -" she froze. "We should ... we should talk to her," she added softly.  
"If my mother did that I swear, I'll -" Tuomas clenched his fists. "But it only makes sense. She told me that someone followed us inside ..."  
"Okay," Tarja said. "Let's think about that. Your mother would never, never ever show the pictures to someone. Right?"  
"I don't think so," Tuomas replied.  
"So we should be safe, right?"  
Tuomas looked at his girlfriend and nodded. "Right."


	42. Chapter 42

They weren't safe.  
On Monday when Tarja entered the classroom, everyone was staring at her. "What?" she asked, without saying good morning. "Did someone die?"  
Everyone stared at Tuomas now and back at Tarja.  
"What?!" Tarja shouted and now looked at Tuomas as well, who avoided her look.  
"Nothing," a few students replied.  
Tarja glared at them and suddenly she got a shock - the pictures! Someone had seen them!  
Her stomach clenched and she had the sudden urge to vomit.  
"Let's start," she said softly and no one answered. It happened to be a very quiet lesson.

Tuomas was the first who left the classroom when the class was dismissed. He couldn't bear their looks anymore, but the words on his locker weren't better.  
TEACHER'S PET!  
Tuomas wondered if the words were written with a waterproof marker ...  
Everyone stared at him, he was aware of that. But how did they know about Tarja and him? Or didn't they know? If they knew, they would say something ... Right?  
"Hey, Tuo."  
Tuomas didn't see the girl's face but he recognised her voice. He quickly turned around and ran after her.  
"Amy! Hey, Amy!"  
Amy turned around, smiling at him. "Yeah?"  
"Can I talk to you?"  
They walked outside, away from Linn and Valerie, who were whispering with each other. They sat down on a bench.  
"What's up?" he asked. "Who wrote 'Teacher's pet' on my locker? And why?"  
"Well, what do you think why?" Amy mumbled. "Listen, Tuo - you and Miss Turunen seemed to have met a lot in private because your performance of that song was just amazing. I cried ... But besides that, you seem to get along pretty well ..." She bit her lip. "Do you know Jarkko? He's in my year."  
"No, I don't ... Why?"  
"He has been on a wedding last weekend ..." Amy sighed and Tuomas got white as a sheet. "He said it was the wedding of a Susanna Holopainen and that he was the groom's cousin. And what he said was ... that he saw you and Miss Turunen there. She accompanied you ... I'm so sorry, Tuo."  
"It's okay," Tuomas said with an empty voice. "Thanks for telling me."  
"Tuo ... You're not ... together, aren't you? Jarkko said he doesn't think so, but ..." Amy went quiet and Tuomas stared into the sky.  
This famous Jarkko - hadn't he seen the scene that his mother had caused? Hadn't he stayed long enough to see him carry out his teacher, yelling he'd make love to her now? Maybe he was lucky, maybe he had left soon enough ... They had kissed a few times, Tuomas needed to know if he had seen that.  
"We're not together," Tuomas now lied. "We're just friends."  
Amy nodded but she avoided his look.  
She didn't believe him.  
"The words," she now said. "Teacher's pet. I didn't know who wrote them, sorry."  
"It's okay. Thanks for telling me the thing with Jarkko," Tuomas replied, eager to talk to that guy.

Tarja stared at the locker, her mouth agape.  
Teacher's pet.  
Which insane person would have done that??  
And what did they know? Tarja was scared and this way she decided to quit now. She checked her clock, decided that she had enough time, and quickly drove home to get her letter of resignation. Forty minutes later she stood in the principal's office, handing him the letter with shaking hands.  
"I already have a place at the Sibelius," she told him. I'll start next September."  
"But Miss Turunen -," her boss started without taking the letter, but Tarja shook him off.  
"This has never been my dream job. Teacher, and here here I'm just that. At the Sibelius I'm a singer and a teacher."  
"Well then," the principal sighed and nodded. "I respect your decision. Can you hand me your resignation?"  
Tarja put the letter on his desk and left the office happily. She couldn't believe she had really done it - Tuomas would be so happy!

Tuomas was happy indeed, but all the incidents that day had caused him to think negative.  
He could only smile as Tarja told him about her resignation and after he had sat down at the piano and started playing a sad and beautiful melody, Tarja understood that he rather wanted to be alone now. Tarja didn't ask him about what had happened, she already thought she knew - the words on Tuomas' locker had shocked her as well. And then the pictures of them ...  
Tarja sat down on the couch and without a warning she started crying - unnoticed by Tuomas who was currently playing a song of The Piano.

Tarja circled her arms around her man and he stopped playing.  
"Not now, Tari," he mumbled as the black haired let her hands roam over his chest.  
But when she sat down next to him and looked at him, his heart almost stopped beating.  
Her look upon his was empty, empty and sad.  
"What happened?" he whispered.  
"You know what happened," Tarja croaked. "Who wrote that on your locker?"  
Tuomas went pale. "I don't know," he whispered.  
"Tuo," Tarja said quietly. "I thought a little and - I hate this but -" Tarja swallowed and embraced him. "I don't want to break up now, but I guess we should have a pause until school's over."  
Tuomas nodded, acting strong. His insides though were moving - his stomach turned and his heart clenched. "That's not bad," he said. "Its over in a month anyway."  
"Yeah, that's what I thought," Tarja replied softly. "We can still be together but we mustn't kiss and have sex ..."  
"Or even look at each other," Tuomas said and Tarja nodded.  
"I just want this to stop before it gets worse," Tarja said. "The pictures were a warning and then the text on your locker - someone knows about us, baby, and I don't want the whole school to know. I guess one month pause won't kill us, right?"  
"I think so too," Tuomas mumbled. "Will you be there for me after that month?"  
"Of course!" Tarja promised and hugged him tight. "I'll show you."

And how she had showed him. Her love making was desperate, hopeful, sad and passionate. She promised him to stay with him forever, she promised him not to do something she'd regret while they were apart.  
And the next day Tuomas didn't return to her home after college.  
"Of course you can stay," Jule said gently. "Willow won't mind. I'll prepare a bed for you."  
"It's good to have a friend like you," Tuomas said with a smile. He could have asked Linn as well, but Amy had warned him that Elis visited her every day. Valerie and Jack already lived together as well, and Amy still lived with her parents, so his next choice had been Jule, who saw nothing more than a good friend in him.  
Jule had immediately sensed something, but she was sensible enough not to ask him about his girlfriend.  
Tuomas didn't tell his parents that Tarja and him were pausing their relationship, he wouldn't be able to stand his mother's comments. Besides that, he was still angry at her for what she had done at Sussu's wedding, and he still thought about the possibility that she had shot the photos of them.  
So the days passed and more and more people talked to Tuomas again. Tarja was back to her furious behaviour, now she even screamed at Tuomas when he wasn't paying attention. They played their roles so well, that one day Tarja made him almost cry. The janitor had removed 'Teacher's pet' from Tuomas' locker and soon everyone had forgotten about the teacher's fondness of the elder student.  
In the beginning of June, Tuomas opened his locker and smiled. A letter had been thrown into it through the slits and he know the handwriting all to well.  
T, it started.  
You can't even imagine how much I miss you. I'm glad you left some of your clothes in my flat, they smell like you and I can't sleep without them. I love you so much, baby, and I can't wait to have you in my arms again. Two more weeks to go, darling.  
By the way, I thought about where we could go on holiday. I thought of Italy ... Think about it.  
With hopeless love,  
T.  
Tuomas sighed gently and opened the folder that showed some hotels in Lignano. One of them had been circled by Tarja and a question mark was next to it, after reading through the offers of the hotel, Tuomas took a pen, wrote "Yes, please book it" next to it and thought of a way to give it back to her.

He did when they gave her their last homework of the year, again a self written song, Tuomas placed the folder between the sheets of his new song Ghost Love Score and put it on her desk without looking at her.  
No one knew about their relationship until ...

It was the last week of college and every student and even teacher was unmotivated - every teacher besides Tarja.  
She yelled at her students when they were lazy again, and then she even threatened them to put a bad mark into their school reports.  
"Everyone of you will get an E, all of you besides Tuomas!" she hissed and everyone moaned.  
"Of course someone who pleases you won't get an E," Sandra mumbled and Tarja walked to her.  
"What?" she asked calmly.  
Sandra looked back at her. "Nothing," she replied.  
Now the whole class was staring at the blushing blonde.  
"Sandra," Tarja said again, this time a little less calm. "What did you just hint?"  
"That Tuomas sexually satisfies you?" Sandra said quietly, but loud enough that everyone heard.  
"That's quite a bad and in front of all a false accusation," Tarja said and Sandra bit her lip before she reached into her schoolbag and pulled out a picture, that Tuomas knew all too well, showing it to their gasping teacher.  
"I want to talk to you after my lesson," Tarja said strictly and Sandra ripped her eyes open.  
"I didn't do that!" she shouted and jumped up. "I swear, Miss Turunen! Turn it around!"  
Tarja turned it around and went pale.  
I put this into your locker because I know that you will tell everyone when the time is right, it said on the backside. I took this picture a while ago and thought everyone should know. You'll know what to do.  
"I didn't want to show it around," Sandra promised. "I wanted to burn it. It's private ..."  
"Now it isn't private anymore," Tarja said softly. "Do you have an idea who could have taken this picture?"  
Sandra shook her head and Tarja walked to the teacher's desk, put the picture into her bag, sat down on the desk and put her face into her hands.  
The whole class was quietly watching their teacher. Was she crying?  
After a minute she put her hands away.  
"Have you ever been in love?" she asked.  
"Never," Sandra answered.  
"Oh yes," Jule and Linn mumbled.  
The whole class was now mumbling either "Yes" or "No" or "Sadly" and Tarja smiled. Once the mumbles had died, she went on.  
"Those who are or had been in love, do you or did you ever love someone whom you aren't allowed to love?" she asked.  
Tuomas was the first one to answer with a yes, followed by a few others.  
Tarja smiled again, sadly. "I fell in love with someone I'm not allowed to love. And I still love him. That's why I'll leave."  
It was completely quiet again and everyone now looked at Tuomas.  
Tarja smiled. "Your suspicion is right," she said to her class and walked over to Tuomas, who now stood up and turned around as well.  
"I did never think of starting something with her for a better grade," Tuomas said and put his arms around his love's waist. "It all happened because of love."  
"It wasn't easy," Tarja said. "Accepting that I loved my student, coming together with him, keeping it a secret."  
"Though we kept it a secret for almost half a year," Tuomas said gently and then turned to his classmates. "I love this woman more than anything, alright? And since it's her last week here, I beg you not to tell anyone."  
"I don't mind," Tarja said. "I'll soon be gone anyway."  
Tuomas shut her up with a soft kiss that made every student start whispering. "Finally I can kiss you again," he whispered and Tarja smiled, replying his kiss gently.

Of course it didn't stay a secret. Soon the whole school knew and whispered about them, meanwhile Tuomas and Tarja couldn't care less and walked trough the school holding hands and kissing each other every now and then. They still didn't know who had taken the pictures of them, but they knew that, whoever had taken them, this person had to be furious now.  
And he was indeed.  
Oliver Jokinen couldn't believe that no one was bullying Tuomas or hating on Tarja now, no one tried to destroy them. No one cared! Sure, they all whispered about them, but no one seemed to be shocked about their relationship!  
What should he do with the pictures now if no one was shocked about them? He needed revenge.

Tuomas soon moved in with Tarja again, and soon after that, Tarja's biggest fear got fulfilled.  
It was a beautiful Tuesday evening in June, the first week after the college had ended. They had just ended their dinner and decided to go on a walk when a simple phone call destroyed their happy lives after the last not that happy weeks again.  
Tuomas heard a crash and sobbing from the living room, so he quickly walked away from the door where he had been waiting for her, back into the living room.  
"Tarja!" he breathed.  
His girlfriend had broken together sobbing, now she was leaning against the wall, her arms slung around her legs, pressing her knees against her forehead. Tuomas didn't see her face, but she was desperately shaking and madly screaming "No, no!" all the time. The earpiece of the telephone was hanging down, so Tuomas took it, lifting it up to his ear.  
"Hello?"  
"Miss Turunen?" a foreign voice asked. "I'm sorry -"  
"It's her boyfriend," Tuomas said. "Miss Turunen isn't available right now."  
"I understand," the foreign voice said. "I'm very sorry for her loss."  
Tuomas closed his eyes.  
"When?" he whispered.  
"This afternoon," the doctor said softly. "It happened quickly, her husband brought her here at two. She was in a horrible pain. It was over half an hour later. She's at a better place now."  
"I know," Tuomas knew. "Thank you."  
With those words he hung up and went on his knees, embracing his crying girlfriend.  
"She's with God now," he promised gently. "She can watch you now, protect you everyday ..."  
Tarja screamed out her pain, gripping her beloved, screamed into his hair. She couldn't believe it was over.  
She had lost her mother.


	43. Chapter 43

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> RIP Marjatta Turunen  
> † 2003
> 
> Warning:  
> Contents of this chapter:  
> Character death and funeral

Tarja wasn't herself anymore.  
She was moving slowly and softly and she didn't talk anymore - not as much as she had talked before.  
Tuomas didn't force her to do anything, but the Thursday before her mother's funeral, Tarja had rolled him over in the bed and started kissing him.  
But once Tuomas had been inside her, Tarja had started sobbing.  
"I'll stop, okay?" Tuomas had asked and even though Tarja had shaken her head, Tuomas had pulled out of his love and kissed her temple.  
"Good night," he had whispered.  
And Tarja had cried quietly, until she had finally managed to fall asleep.  
Everything was too much for her right now.

She looked beautiful.  
She wore a short black dress, a black blazer, black pumps and her hair fell over her shoulders. Even though she looked deeply sad and crushed, she had never looked more beautiful to Tuomas.  
"I'm ready," she said with a quiet voice and without looking him into his eyes.  
Tuomas pulled her close and in a bone crushing hug. "Don't think about last night."  
"I'll try to," Tarja mumbled. "Let's drive."

Tuomas had to drive, his girlfriend still was too weak for anything. While Tarja only sat there and looked out of the window, Tuomas tried to think of something to make her happy again.  
In the church he held her hand.  
The priest was doing a good job and in front of all he was leading a very sad and emotional mass. Tarja buried her face in Tuomas' shoulder.  
"Marjatta was a loved woman because she was able to love," the priest said and Tarja sobbed more. "She was able to laugh, able to be happy, able to believe. We need more angels like this on earth but instead she got taken from our circle way too early. Oh lord, why do angels fall first?" He went silent and looked at Tarja, who was holding on her boyfriend, almost breaking together.  
"Miss Turunen," the priest said softly. "Do you want to say a few words?"  
Tarja looked up. Her eyes were swollen and red, but she nodded and stood up. With wobbly knees she walked over to the priest, smiling bravely.  
She went pale as she looked around the church.  
Tuomas was so proud when Tarja unfolded a piece of paper and started reading.  
"Marjatta Turunen," she read, her voice hoarse. "I have so many things to say about you. I can't remember a time you weren't on my side. You always helped me, no matter what, you - you did everything for me. You weren't only my Mommy, you were - you were -"  
And Tarja broke together again.  
Tuomas jumped up and fasted forward. "Sorry, she's still upset," Tuomas mumbled to the priest while he pulled up his woman.  
"Sorry," Tarja sobbed into Tuomas' shoulder, who was now holding her tight.  
He took the paper from her and continued reading, his love in his arms.  
"You were my best friend. I remember a time I came home from school. I had been crying. You poured me some cocoa and listened to me. You always listened to me. You held my heart." Tuomas smiled gently. Yes, she could be poetic. "You saved me. I know I always say I can't rememeber getting bullied but I do ..." Tuomas started stroking her head, a little shocked about her confession. "I remember every word they said but I acted strong because of you. I wanted you to be proud at me ... and you were. I miss you so much, Mommy. Come back." Tuomas closed his eyes. His heart was clenching, and when he opened his eyes again, his cheeks were wet. "I love you. My best friend, you took my best friend from me. Why did you do that?" Tuomas hugged her tighter. "I prayed every evening but it didn't help. Why did you take my Mommy? What did she do?"  
Tuomas felt his heart break. He couldn't go on, but he had to. For Tarja. He felt her hands pressing herself against him and he knew he had to be strong for her.  
"I've found love now," Tuomas went on and smiled. "Tuomas. I love him more than words can say." Tuomas stopped reading to kiss Tarja's head, mumbling, "I love you too, sweetheart," before he went on.  
"You accepted him as I wished you to accept the love of my life. I wanted to thank you for it, but now it's to late. Thank you, Mommy, thank you for everything. I will never forget you, I will never stop being thankful for believing in me. Remember when you said I'd become a singer, marry the man I love and get babies with him? Thank you so much for believing in me like this. I wish you could have been able to meet our babies ..." Tuomas closed his eyes for a moment, but the tears were still dripping out of his eyes. "Watch us," he ended softly. "Watch Daddy and watch me and my little family ... We will never forget you."  
It was quiet after Tuomas had ended and as he looked around the church, he saw how many relatives of Tarja were crying.  
"Are you strong enough to walk?" Tuomas asked gently and Tarja nodded.  
"Yes ... I am." She pulled away from him and followed the priest, who was now walking outside.  
It was raining, much to Tarja's satisfaction. It would have been unfair if the sun had been shining while her mother got buried.  
"Bye," she whispered as they carried the coffin past her and she squeezed Tuomas' hand.  
And then she saw them.  
They stood next to get church, very far away, but Tarja recognised them, thanks to her new contact lenses. They were talking to each other ...  
"Let's go ... Quickly!" Tarja breathed and pulled at Tuomas' blazer. "Come on, Tuo, let's go ..."  
"It's not over yet," Tuomas said surprised, but Tarja pulled him away from the grave desperately.   
"I ... I need sex. Now."  
Tuomas laughed and then he noticed that she was staring over to the church all the time.  
"No -" Tarja wanted to stop him, but Tuomas had already turned his head.  
And who was standing there was no one else than Oliver - and Noel.  
"What are they doing here?" Tuomas whispered, thinking, 'Why Noel? Why him?!'  
"Mother got along with them pretty fine," Tarja mumbled. "I guess that's why ... But why are they talking to each other? They don't know each other ..." Tarja was almost hyperventilating.  
She was surrounded by her first love, the man who had raped her and the man with whom she'd spend the rest of her life.  
A wave of nausea washed over her and Tarja sent a prayer to heaven - she wasn't allowed to vomit now. Not now.  
"They're coming," Tarja mumbled panicking and hid her face in her boyfriend's chest. "Tell me they didn't see me ..."  
"They saw you," Tuomas sighed and Tarja let go of him.  
"Tarja," Oliver said. "I'm so sorry for your loss ..."  
"Me too," the second man, Noel mumbled.  
Tuomas tried not to stare at Noel but he couldn't help it.  
He was - he was everything that Tuomas had always wanted to be. He was tall, even taller than Tuomas. His hair was as dark as his but it wasn't long. He had muscles that Tuomas could only wish for. His beard was like Tuomas' but it looked even more perfect. His eyes, his nose, his whole face ... He was handsome. Tuomas felt more jealous because of him than he had ever felt because of Oliver.  
This guy was definitely a woman's dream guy.  
"Noel," Tarja said softly. "Why are you here?"  
"Marjatta was my friend," the tall man replied. His voice was deep and smooth.  
Tuomas said nothing and the men ignored him. After a while relative after relative vanished, telling Tarja they'd wait for her at Teuvo's home.  
And soon they were alone, Tarja, Tuomas, Noel and Oliver.  
"Oh, come here," Noel sighed after a while and pulled Tarja in a hug.  
Tarja replied the hug shyly.  
It felt so strange ... She was hugging the man she once had loved more than anything, the same man who had called her fat, bad in bed, the man who had cheated her for so many times ...  
Tarja pulled back and looked up to him. "You look good ..."  
"So do you," Noel replied with a smile and Tarja blushed.  
None of them noticed what happened behind them ...  
"She'll go back to him," Oliver said to Tuomas. "She doesn't need you anymore."  
"Shut up," Tuomas said.  
"You don't please her enough," Oliver went on and observed the big man and the small woman. "No one but him will ever be able to do that."  
"So if a woman cums five or more times a night, she's not pleased enough?" Tuomas asked dryly and Oliver shrugged.  
"Sure. You couldn't do that, you're only a boy. I'm sure she always faked it. Even though it looked quit real that day -"  
"What?" Tuomas asked and ripped his eyes from Tarja and Noel.  
Oliver shrugged. "Your quickie in the classroom. You know what I'm talking about. You received my pictures."  
For a moment Tuomas didn't react, but then his fist landed in Oliver's face without planning it.  
Tarja turned around because she had heard a crash and a scream.  
"Tuo!" she yelled as she saw that he was shaking his hand while Oliver was lying on the floor.  
"It's broken!" he screamed, meaning both his hand and Oliver's nose.  
"Did you hit him?" Tarja gasped. "Tuo, why did you -?!"  
"He took the pictures!" Tuomas yelped and looked at his blue fingers. "Ouch ..."  
"What?!" Tarja shrieked and approached Oliver on the ground. His nose was bleeding. "Why did you do that??" she screamed at him.  
"You're mine," Oliver moaned and grabbed Tarja's hand, pulling her down. "Mine ..."  
"I'm not yours!" Tarja screeched and tried to rip herself away from the dark blonde. "Help!"  
Noel reacted quickly, he grabbed Tarja's hips and put his foot on Oliver's arm, he pulled on the woman and stepped on the other man's arm, who let go of Tarja with a yell.  
"Okay, calm," Noel now said and looked at Tuomas. "I'll drive you two to the hospital. Tarja, do you want me to bring you home?"  
"I wanna be with Tuomas," Tarja whispered and took his healthy hand. "Just don't leave me alone with Oliver ..."  
"We won't," Tuomas moaned. He couldn't move his fingers anymore, but right now he didn't care. "He raped her."  
"What?" Noel asked in shock and stared at Tarja. "He did what?"  
"He raped me several times," Tarja whispered and Noel clenched his fists.  
"I'll kill him ..."  
"I'll gladly help you," Tuomas said through gritted teeth, but Tarja screamed, "No!"  
The men looked at Tarja, who was pacing in front of her mother's tomb. Everything had been so perfect but within a day everything had escalated ... "Don't kill him. Noel, bring us three to the hospital. Please."  
Noel did what Tarja had asked him to, and soon they were driving to the hospital.  
Noel called the police after he had listened to what Oliver had done to Tarja and her boyfriend, and after the police had gotten informed about the fact that he had raped his ex girlfriend and taken private pictures of her (and showed them to others), it was sure that he'd come into prison.  
Nothing happened to Tuomas, and while he doctors were checking on his fingers, Tarja walked around the hospital until she reached the fraction which she had been looking for.  
"Excuse me," she said to a female doctor who was currently writing something into a little notepad.  
"How can I help you, honey?" the doctor asked with a smile and Tarja blushed a little.  
"I'm not feeling well ... You know, I've gotten a few bad shocks the last four days -" Tarja breathed in and then she whispered, "Could you check if my baby is alright?"  
"Sure, honey," the doctor said gently. "How far along are you?"  
"I don't know exactly," Tarja replied. "Not that far. I only found out two weeks ago. A little more than a month, I guess."  
"Come with me, honey, I'll check on you and your baby," the doctor promised and Tarja followed her into the practice of the maternity fraction.


	44. Chapter 44

"How are you feeling?" Tuomas asked, stroking his girlfriend's hair behind her ear.  
"Mhh ... tired." she yawned. "It's so exhausting to lay in the sun all day."  
Tuomas laughed and Tarja chuckled as well. Then she sighed and turned on her canvas chair so she could look at Tuomas. "I don't want to go home ..."  
"Me neither," Tuomas replied and took her hand.  
One week they had been in Italy and slowly Tuomas' sunburn was fading. Tarja had always been careful enough not to be too much in the sun, first because of her skin and second because of the baby, which was still a secret she alone carried around. Only she and her mother had known and her mother had died soon after Tarja had told her, so Tarja was the only one who knew right now.  
Tarja closed her eyes and remembered the day she had told her mother ...  
Marjatta had been more ill as usual, Teuvo had even said to Tarja that she shouldn't go to her.  
"It's important, Daddy. I really need to talk to her," Tarja had replied and her father had let her visit her mother with a sigh.  
"Hi, Mommy," Tarja whispered and sat down at the chair next to the bed. Marjatta looked horrible, pale, and the bags under her eyes were horrendous.  
"Sweetie," she sighed weakly. "Why - are you here? You shouldn't - see me like this ..."  
Tarja took her mother's hand. Tears were in her eyes and she smiled. "I ... I have to tell you something," she whispered. "But swear not to tell a soul! Please, Mum ..."  
"I promise, honey, but what happened? Did Tuomas ask you to marry him?"  
"No, not yet," Tarja said and smiled. "Mum, I'm ... I'm going to have a baby."  
"What?" Marjatta whispered and even though she was way too ill she sat up and hugged her daughter. "I'll be a grandma?"  
"Yes," Tarja said, now crying happy tears. "I can't believe it, I'm pregnant ..."  
"Oh congratulations!" Marjatta said and coughed. "I hope Tuomas is happy!"  
"He doesn't know yet but he'll be happy. He wants a baby. Well, not yet, but -" Tarja grimaced and wiped her tears away. "It's early, that's true. But now it's too late."  
"Oh you two will be wonderful parents." Marjatta had tears of happiness in her eyes and put her hand on Tarja's belly. "How far along are you?"  
"I only found out yesterday," Tarja said and wiped more tears away. "You're the first one I told about it."  
"Oh, I'm so honoured," Marjatta said and embraced her daughter. "I can't wait ... My daughter will get a baby ..."  
The women had cried and Marjatta had felt too happy to be real. And Tarja's life had been perfect. Until the doctor had called ...  
"What are you thinking of?"  
"Hm?" Tarja looked at her boyfriend and sighed. "I'm thinking of Mommy ..."  
Tuomas kissed her forehead. "I also think of her a lot but I know that I can't even imagine what's going on inside you ..."  
Tarja smiled a little. "True, you can't."  
Tuomas' lips wandered down to her ear, kissing her earlobe. "Last night," he whispered. "Wow ... You made love as if you desperately needed it ..."  
"I'm in need twenty four hours a day," Tarja mumbled and Tuomas laughed.  
Tarja sighed. So many hints. He didn't seem to get it. Tarja tried so hard to make him get it.  
"I don't want the sun to shine on my stomach."  
"Is the cheese in there pasteurised?"  
"I'll take orange juice instead of the wine, thank you."  
"I'm feeling sick."  
"My feet are so swollen ..."  
"I think I'm getting ill, I just vomited."  
"I'm fat. I need to lose weight."  
"Can you lift that box for me? It's too heavy for me."  
"I need sex - now."  
Every single one of those sentences had at least fallen once in the last two weeks, but Tuomas hadn't even reacted on it.  
Didn't he get it or was he too shy to ask her if she could be pregnant?? After a while her hints got even more obvious.  
"Do we have some pickled gherkins left? I'd like to eat them on my Nutella bread."  
"I'll be done soon, I need to take my vitamin tablet first!"  
"Gosh look at my skin ... Those hormones are driving me crazy."  
"Did my breasts grow? Tuomas, what do you think?"  
"If I need something? Hmm, pasteurised cheese, chocolate ice cream, no tampons - oh, and could you buy some vitamin tablets in the pharmacy? Make sure there's folic acid and magnesium inside."  
Why didn't he get it?

Why didn't she just tell him?  
Tuomas smiled while he gently kissed the nape of his Love's neck. She was so beautiful, now even more than ever before. Tuomas knew that she already knew about her pregnancy, he had doubted it when she had started asking if her breasts were huge, saying that she was fat, saying that she felt sick ... But then she had started taking vitamins. She knew she wouldn't need tampons anymore. She knew she wasn't allowed to eat unpasteurised cheese. She knew, so why didn't she tell him?  
"Wanna fool around a little in the shower later?" Tuomas mumbled into Tarja's ear and the woman in need moaned.  
"I'd fuck you right here and now if I could ..."

He didn't bother with a condom anymore, why should he? He plunged into her, took her thighs and wrapped her legs around him, moved against her, captured her lips. Their tongues fought and Tuomas put his hands on her breasts, kneading them while he pushed against her, carefully enough not to smash her belly.  
Oh, how he loved this beautiful woman, this perfect woman, mother of the proof of their love.  
They kissed wildly and Tarja moved her fingers through his hair.  
Oh, how she loved this man. She loved him more than ever. The father of their perfect baby.  
They came so synchron as they had never come before.  
Sighing love declarations into each other's ears, they rolled over and kissed.  
Tuomas hands stroke over her belly. He was smiling and his eyes were full of happiness and love, and suddenly Tarja knew that he knew.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Tuomas asked a while later.  
The couple walked along the seashore, hand in hand, enjoying their last night in Italy.  
"I wanted you to find out," Tarja said. "Why didn't you tell me you knew?"  
"It was funny," Tuomas said with a grin. "Your steady tries to make me realise ... They got more and more obvious and it was just funny. But Tarja, how couldn't I have noticed? It's already showing."  
Tarja blushed. "Oh gosh, really?"  
Tuomas nodded. "You're slim, and when you stand there straight you either look pregnant or as if you've eaten a little too much."  
"Oh, Tuo," Tarja whispered and slung her arms around his neck. "We're going to be parents ..."  
"My mother will get a heart attack," Tuomas said. "Three children and the youngest of them will be the first one of them to give her a grandchild."  
Tarja laughed and rubbed her nose against his. "I've never been so happy before," she said. "I mean, can it get more perfect? I'm legally together with the love of my life, living together with him, I'm pregnant from him, currently I'm in Italy with him, walking along the sea ... It's so cheesy, I'm almost vomiting. Or maybe I'm just sick of being pregnant. Literally."  
Tuomas didn't answer and Tarja laughed. "Oh. I forgot you're a romantic. I bet you enjoy this cheesy love story of us."  
"I do," Tuomas answered. "But I don't quite agree with you, after all it can get get more romantic ..."  
"And how?" Tarja chuckled.  
And Tuomas fell on his knees.

No one of them said a word for a few minutes, Tarja had pressed her hands on her mouth, a few sobs escaping her.  
Tuomas stared back at her, holding the ring up to her.  
"I have no words," he breathed after a while. "You know what I feel for you and you know I want to marry you. Now it's up to you ... I've planned to ask you before I found out you were pregnant, so I'm not asking you because you are ... I'm asking you because you're my life -"  
"Asking me what?" Tarja interrupted him and giggled when he stared at her dazzled. "You haven't asked me yet," Tarja hinted with a whisper and Tuomas blushed.  
"Oh yeah," he muttered. "T - Tarja ... Tarja Soile Susanna Turunen, after all I want to be proper. Tari. I love you so much, way too much. A life without you would be so senseless so please agree on spending the rest of your love with this stupid boy here for whom you are the world. Will you marry him and make him the happiest man alive? Tarja ... Will you marry me?"  
And Tarja sunk on her knees as well. Now she was shaking as the tears took over. She couldn't say anything, she could only nod, nod and take the ring from him to put it on her finger.  
This was forever.

***

About eight months later ...

"Do you like the new music teacher?" Linn asked with a lifted eyebrow.  
Tuomas let out a bellowing laugh.  
"You're stupid, Linn," he said and nudged his friend. "No!!" Then he smiled and pulled out his camera. "That's her," he whispered and Linn gasped.  
"Tuo - she's -" Linn was unable to say something about this beautiful baby. With tears in her eyes she passed the camera to Valerie and Amy.  
"Wow, Tuo!" Valerie said. "I dare to say you did a great job."  
"How's Miss Turunen?" Amy asked.  
"Exhausted but happy," Tuomas replied. "You should see her, she's so calm ... As if she finally has found her reason to live."  
"Her eyes are green," Valerie suddenly said and zoomed the picture closer to the baby's eyes.  
"One of the many things she has from Tarja," Tuomas said with a smile. "Her eyes, her cheeks, her operatic voice ..."  
The girls laughed.  
"Aw, she has your nose," Valerie suddenly said.  
"She's so cute, Tuo, I could die," Linn sighed. "Can you bring her over one day?"  
"Maybe," Tuomas chuckled. When she's older."  
"So what's her name now?" Amy wanted to know and Tuomas smiled softly.  
"Marjatta. After Tarja's mother who passed away last June."  
"That's sweet," Valerie said. "What does your mother say?"  
"First she was furious when we told her," Tuomas laughed. "It was horrible. Tarja cried. But after a few months she slowly started to accept her. And Marjatta - seriously, my mother is totally in love with our little one. She calmed down after we told her that her third name is Kirsti."  
"What's her second name?" Linn asked curiously and Tuomas laughed.  
"Soile."  
Now the girls laughed again, remembering the time when Tuomas had dated 'Soile'. Now his daughter was called like that.  
"So, when is the wedding?" Valerie asked jokingly, but Tuomas grinned.  
"In August - wanna come?"  
"Wait, you'll really marry her?" Amy asked stunned. "You'll marry the devil??"  
"She's no devil anymore," Tuomas said softly. "She never was, to be honest ... She just needed love."  
"Awww," the girls made and one after the other hugged the young father.

"I'm home darling," Tuomas whispered and Tarja rushed out of the bedroom. "Where's my precious girl?"  
"Which one?" Tarja whispered and hugged her fiancé.   
"Oh, right. I have two." Tuomas chuckled and kissed his woman. "Where's Marjatta?"  
"Sleeping, finally," Tarja sighed. "And we should sleep as well ..."  
"You should," Tuomas said seriously. "You really should. How are you?"  
"Tired and sore," Tarja answered. "When I walk I feel ... I feel it." She grimaced. "A lot. Marjatta ripped my genitals apart on her flight out of me."  
Tuomas smiled. "I'll cook something for us, okay, baby?"  
"Please," Tarja mumbled and yawned. "Can you remember what happened a year ago?"  
"I remember exactly what happened a year ago," Tuomas replied with a huff. "I took you on the teacher's desk and Oliver took pictures ... I'm glad he's in prison, after all he has done ..."  
Tarja sighed melancholic. "So ... Did you talk to your boys already?"  
"Yes," Tuomas said and hugged the elder woman. "They say they would love to have you in Nightwish. We just have to wait until Marjatta is old enough."  
Tarja's face lit up. "They do - they do?? They want me in your band?? As your new singer??"  
"Yes, they -" Tuomas started but Tarja jumped at him and cut him off with a kiss.  
Nightwish had gotten a topic a few months passé, when Jukka had joined again and offered them to play in some clubs all around Helsinki, Kitee, Lahti, Turku and so on. Kaisa had officially left now, but instead they had taken Tarja into the band as she still had been pregnant. She had sung to the guys and everyone had agreed:  
With Tarja in their band, their career would go up faster than it had so far.  
Fact was, with Tarja's help, Nightwish would conquer Finland with the melodic sounds of their symphonic metal genre - or maybe even the world?  
Sometimes Tarja just looked up to the sky and thanked her mother for everything. Thanked her mother for taking her to Helsinki, in front of all. She even thanked Oliver somehow - without him she probably hadn't met Tuomas, her love, her life, her everything.  
Tarja pulled away and stared into his blue eyes, caressed the nose he had given to their beautiful daughter.  
Tuomas thanked God for putting this woman on his side as his teacher, he thanked his mother for forcing him to visit this college, he thanked Tarja for being the bitchy teacher she had been in the beginning.  
He knew he had been a teacher's pet, but he had never been one to get better grades.  
Everything had happened out of love, no matter that their age difference was high.  
Now their love was showing, the biggest proof of their love currently lay in the bedroom and slumbered peacefully.  
Tuomas had found his reason.  
Tarja had found her one and only.  
And they knew they'd never part.

***

\--- End of Teacher's Pet ---


End file.
